Don Carlo Fawning Boxing Day Open Thread

Oh my LAWD, they’s a bunch of Lesser Footy going down.  Who says the Day After Christmas is depressing?  I don’t have to work, and we get a de facto Second Lesser Saturday.  I’ll fookin’ take it, like.

Spurs and Brighton kick us off bright and early (yes, I set my alarm – 7:30, NBCSN).  One might think Mourinho would take out his frustration over Chelsea kicking his teeth in last weekend – but Trashbirds have been a tough out most of the season.  I wouldn’t rule out their stealing at least a point here.

Southampton at Chelski is your NBCSN broadcast choice for the 10:00 window.  I cry bullshit – a manager the calibre of Carlo Ancelotti makes his debut for Everton (home to Burnley, 10:00, NBC Gold), and you don’t focus on that.  SHAME.  I would say they’d never do that with an asshole London club…but Arsenal/Bournemouth (Horatio/yeah right Derby!!!) is in the same boat.  Might have to have both laptops running this window.

At least we get an afternoon doubleheader, meaning 4 match windows to stuff oneself with.  I have no idea how Newcastle have managed to sneak into the top half, but there they are nonetheless.  They get a Boxing Day trip to Old Trafford (12:30, NBCSN) and one never knows what to expect from Ole’s United.

Unquestionably the match of the day – 1st place Redshite visiting (albeit distant) 2nd position Leicester.  I will watch it despite both rancid cunts on the touchline, and I expect Man City to be in silver medal position after their Friday clash with Wolves (2:45, NBCSN).  But nobody is catching the blasted Reds, to Hippo’s chagrin.

The picture above?  My kids put Kruger’s stern, leader face on top of…what I think is a picture of Alexander the Great?  Anyway, it’s cool as fuck and I figured I would share.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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theeWeeBabySeamus

I am currently high as fuck. And my mother is pissed off. She’s not pissed because I’m high. She’s cool that way. But she’s pissed about something else and keeps wanting to talk about it. And every time she starts talking I start laughing. Ya know, because I’m high n junk.

It is not making her happy. But it is making me laugh.

litre_cola

Just bought a pair of hiking boots, and pair of Doc Martens from the boxing day sales without leaving my couch and having to kill someone at the mall!

Vodka time!

theeWeeBabySeamus

WELL I HOPE YOU BROUGHT ENOUGH FOAR EVERYBODY!!!!

(nah never mind, screw the rest of them, I hope you brought enough foar meeeee)

Horatio Cornblower

How’s he supposed to do that when he doesn’t know our sizes?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Why do I find daU losing (so far at least) to LaTech completely hilarious?

The Maestro

Afternoon, folks. We have hockey, JV football, and futbol on here at my folks’ place. I haven’t moved in hours. This is why you call your mother – to keep coming back.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Artist’s Conception…
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scotchnaut

Do they test college refs for roids? If you be watching this football game you’d say ‘Hell, Nah!”.

scotchnaut

Anyone gonna watch The Might As Well Be Walk On’s The Sun Bowl?

yeah right

Greeting from work!

Only 7 1/2 more hours to go!

Actually, we’ve got a fair amount of stuff to do so it should pass quickly.

Gumbygirl

That cat knows what’s up, but he aint tellin’!

scotchnaut

Canada has tied things up at 2-2 and the announcers are slightly less happy than the players.

scotchnaut

The US is up 2-0 on the Canadian Juniors. No word yet on how much Mark Trestman is up on American minors but the rumour going round is that he’s completely dominating them.

LemonJello

Well that description just got a huge share of the Catholic priesthood to tune in…

scotchnaut

Anyone have any beefs with this list? I haven’t gone down too far but the greatest college tight end of all time is Ditka with 45 receptions and 7 TD’s? Among his accolades (and there are very few) is the fact he punched a couple of his lineman.

https://www.espn.com/college-football/story/_/id/28356861/the-all-all-america-team-college-football-150th-anniversary

Horatio Cornblower

Ditka was, I think, the first TE to really be used as something more than an extra blocker, even those his stats would be one halfway decent season these days. I don’t have a problem with his ranking if it’s to give him that credit.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Couldn’t they just rank the mini Ditkas 1-11?
OH COME ON THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN HILARIOUS.

scotchnaut

I didn’t try very hard and found Ron Kramer-53/880/8 over his career at Michigan. I think Ditka just captured sportswriter’s attention back then.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why is Peyton Manning on that team instead of Tee Martin?

Horatio Cornblower

Got a request for a donation from UConn to help them fund the new president’s idea to let lower income kids go to UConn tuition free. A worthy idea indeed, but as the request came on the same day I got hit for $1,800+ so that my son can take a winter class in a subject he already took but since he transferred in from another school UConn wouldn’t honor it, and when they’re raising fees again in part to cover what might be the most embarrassing football team in the US, the answer was a rather aggressive “no.”

theeWeeBabySeamus

what might be the most embarrassing football team in the US

NC State would like a word with you.

scotchnaut

Promised the wifey that I would spend some time with her out in No Internet Land. It’s been a rough go. No pics of partially-clad women. No intelligent back and forth’s regarding politics. No snarky quips. No sprots of any kind. Lots of gossip about local people. Plenty of mundane chatter. Is this hell?

/Not quite, but close enough for me

LemonJello

This isn’t just some elaborate alibi for another hobo hunting/scouting expedition, is it?

Beerguyrob

Malls are just “recon missions”.

litre_cola

I hate futbol. Stupid addiction.

Horatio Cornblower

“The worst”-Sid Vicious

scotchnaut

[in gravelly voice] “You and me, kid.”

-William S. Burroughs

Horatio Cornblower

“……………… ”
-Mrs. William S. Burroughs

scotchnaut

This guy knows his “Getting Away With Shooting Your Wife In The Head Down In Mexico” history.

Beerguyrob

“Stop stabbing me.”

— Arn Anderson

Horatio Cornblower

Just did an Ionic Cleanse Detox which consisted of me sticking my feet into a pan of warm water and then getting some sort of mild electric charge through it. Wife got it for Xmas. Claims to cure/help everything from Autism to Vaginal Dryness, (pleased to report I have neither), so I smell a fair bit of bullshit here.

My takeaway is that me feet are absolutely filthy, but now feel clean and tingly.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!
STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!
STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!
STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!
STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!
STRONG COFFEE COLONIC!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

Do they run an electric current so that you shit your pants?

I’m not clear on how this will “cleanse” you…

Horatio Cornblower

It takes all the negative ions out of my body through my feet, duh.

There’s a pamphlet* and everything.
*Pamphlet has not been cleared by the FDA

theeWeeBabySeamus

Might be the way toward making the Q.
Just saying.

ballsofsteelandfury

It might make you poop out a pretzel…

rockingdog

Yikes
Chelsea now down 2-0

Horatio Cornblower

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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TheRevanchist

I don’t know who Chelsea is, but she seems like my kind of woman.

rockingdog

Yooooo
The dude Pulisic coming in to try to turn this around.
Gooooo Chelsea!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Good morning! How’s everyone’s head? Mine’s at like a 3.5 out of 10, so not great, but I’ve been worse.

ArmedandHammered

Everyone else in the house is feeling worse for wear, but my head is clear. I had to work today so no drinking for me, normally that would not stop me but I am the only one on my entire team working so I can’t pawn any problems off on anyone else. Boo.

I hope everyone else had a great Christmas.

yeah right

Actually about a 7. I’m surprised as well but we didn’t get too crazy just a few beers, some wine and a couple of bourbon shots.

You know, a Wednesday.

litre_cola

Jesus H Christ. 4 kids in Decilitres daycare would be better than Might Whiteys back line.

Fuck it

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I first read that as “tighty whiteys”.
Then I remembered you’re weirder than I am so I will refrain.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Racist or language pun?

It can be both.

The Gentlemen (2020) dir. Guy Ritchie

rockingdog

Go away stupid I-Phone ad.
I have an I-Phone SE and I love it!
I call it the Bat Phone.

rockingdog

Yikes Chelsea down 1-0

bk109

Heh… you know you’re bored, when you decide to see if you can hack your own WiFi password. Still, thank Jebus for CUDA (and the advancements in Kali-land 😀 )

Edit: Oh, Look… Arsenal are shitting the bed again… Shocker, I know.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Maybe I should change my password from a Balls’ Pornhub search term, plus 69…….

bk109

Actually, used the guest account password, which is the name of an Austo-Hungarian battleship sunk near the end of the 1st World War.. Tho’ balls can see what sort of kinky shit can “Szent Ivan” (Saint Ivan) provide him

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“WillemJosephvanGhent###69”

‘You are connected’

bk109

heh-69-hehcomment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Anybody see 1917 yet?

Asking for a history pedantic.

bk109

Followup question if someone in here actually saw it… Why is the whole premise of the movie 2 people having to cross enemy lines to another friendly unit to stop something or other, OR ELSE? I mean… unless the other unit is encircled, which isn’t mentioned in the trailers, that makes zero sense.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Kinda where I was going with that. Getting stranded behind the lines and surviving in spite of repetitive and predictable command decisions based on past wars’ tactics would be a great story, although not Hollywood enough. Visually it appears to be fantastic, the cinematography seems to have potential, and the equipment and ‘feel’ based on clips seem good. It’s just that a ‘Hollywood’ type story line could ruin all that.

yeah right

Agreed. The concept of doing the entire movie as one continuous take is cool as hell. Kind of like Birdman. Saw the trailer the last 2 times I went to the movies and I’ll see it for sure on the big screen.

ArmedandHammered

I kind of filled in the blanks with my own imagination, that the brother’s unit was mounting some sort of secret surprise attack on an apparent weakness (maybe a supply depot that is supposed to have little to no guards?), that is actually a trap. Plus in WWI there was little to no radio communication, they used telegraph’s in the trenches to communicate with command and each other. So they have to send a messenger to the unit to tell them “It’s a Trap!” and to not attack.

bk109

But here’s the issue with that logic… Why do that THROUGH the enemy lines, where you can get easily intercepted and killed, when you can just go through your own lines of communication where… well.. you don’t get killed. Also “field telephones” were a thing in WW1 (especially useful for artillery coordination), so “It’s a Trap” was literally a couple of calls away 😀

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

Pussy?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That has complications.

ballsofsteelandfury

Morning boys! I’m working.

ballsofsteelandfury

Should be interesting. I would definitely pick Monterrey to win today. América has lost every road game in the Liguilla and Monterrey is tough at home.

Horatio Cornblower

To be fair America hasn’t been all that great on the road since Vietnam.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“I’d like a word.”

-General Douglas MacArthur

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

*Since everybody seems to hate ties.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“…..??”

-Donovan McNabb

litre_cola

Already down 1-0, Lua Lua is still playing football and he beat the pathetic back 4.

however now 1-1 in the 8th.

rockingdog

Found a funny:comment image

rockingdog

Gooooo Chelski!

rockingdog

Happy Boxing Day all!

Fronkenshteen

Holy shit. Don Carlo’s left eyebrow arch is positively Belushian.

litre_cola

What a fucking goal.

LemonJello

I am at work. Because I needed a break from family, and the Lady LemonJello had to work today as well.

House LemonJello’s Christmas Prime Rib dinner was fan-fucking-tastic. Big thanks to all who advised on proper prep & cooking.

Food was consumed. Booze were drank. Family was sent on their way. It was good.

litre_cola

Friends of Fulham

Ask most Whites supporters and they’d tell you they would prefer the Championship over the Premier League. Why? The sanitised Premier League experience, the drastic gap between the top and bottom clubs, and the exorbitant ticket prices all contribute to the top flight losing its luster.

In the Premier League, you could never get a day out at Luton Town. Where else would you walk to the away end through a row of houses?

litre_cola

The entry to Luton Town is through peoples row housing block. It is amazing.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Not so much.”

-People in flat next-door.

Fronkenshteen

What immediate changes you expect? Formation? Personnel?

Fronkenshteen

What time did decilitre wake up. Fronkenshrub awoke at half six.

litre_cola

He woke up at 520. No matter what time we put him to bed he gets up at 5. He was tired so slept from 6 pm to 520. We have adjusted our habits for this. I go to sleep at 9 pm. I usually have to get up for work at 515 during the week so only a big deal when there is no futbol on.

Fronkenshteen

And to think in ten years, we’re going to be yelling at them to get out of bed at noon.

Fronkenshteen

Just mentioned that to my wife. You’ve a keen eye for teh upset.

litre_cola
Fronkenshteen
litre_cola

WHAT ABOUT FULHAM”S TRIP TO..

/checks notes. Luton Town?