Sexy Friday, It’s December! edition

Holy Moly how is it already December?!? It seems only yesterday that it was March and St. Patrick’s Day parties got cancelled because of some weird disease coming from China. I remember people thinking and saying everything would be fine in a couple of weeks.

Ah, good times.

However, many good things have happened. The summer went relatively well as the number of cases, deaths, and hospitalizations worldwide went down. We got sports back, first with the AFL and then soccer and then hockey and eventually other obscure sports like basketball and baseball.

Apparently a couple of LA teams won those championships, but neither got a parade, so I’m pretty sure that means they don’t count.

We are now in Week 13 of the NFL season or, as I like to call it, the N-Fuck it, they’re young and their careers are short anyway and we don’t have a health care program that covers them after their playing careers so who gives a shit if they all get COVID-L season.

Make no mistake, NFL players are the Declining American Empire’s version of the Declining Roman Empire’s Gladiators. However, forgive me if I want some more immediate bloodlust gratification. Having them die ten years after retirement doesn’t really do it for me, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

Now I want to go to a bullfight.

Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to make some tapas, open a bottle of wine, and watch La Liga tomorrow.

For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.

***

Without further ado, here are the Top Twenty Five Pics of The Week:

h/t Brocky
h/t Unsurprised
h/t Brocky
h/t Brocky
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t
h/t Brocky
h/t
h/t
h/t
h/t Brocky
h/t Unsurprised
h/t Brocky
h/t Don T
h/t Viva La Tabula Raza
h/t Brocky
h/t
h/t
h/t Brocky
h/t

***

YOU’RE-A-PRUDE

***

And now, for the music!

As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

Please check out this selection of good songs. We are back to our hidden themes. You can ask for a maximum of three hints in the comments.

Song Number One:

New Order – Temptation

Canción Número Dos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ahU-x-4Gxw
New Order – Age of Consent

Chanson Numéro Trois:

New Order – Ceremony

Canzone numero quattro:

New Order – Regret

Canção número cinco

New Order – Confusion

Seigarren zenbakia:

New Order – Crystal

Let me know in the comments what you think and what song brings a smile to your face.

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and try to stay the fuck away from stupid people. That’s not COVID-19 advice, that’s just general good sense. See you next week!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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clint greasewood

duh

Last edited 3 years ago by clint greasewood
Gumbygirl

200 comments for a non sports night is pretty good.
(Unless you count UL-Lafayette. And even people who went there probably don’t.)

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Because they can’t count

yeah right

We are a stupid, stupid species.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So I’m all for shelter in place and people not being idiots, but technically if my best friend came over and drank 6 feet away, would we be violating the new order?

yeah right

You need to be outdoors.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I thought even outdoors was verboten under the new one

Dunstan

“All public and private gatherings of any number of people from more than one household are prohibited, except for outdoor faith-based services described in Paragraph 5 and participating in an in-person outdoor protest while wearing a face covering, maintaining social distancing, and observing the Los Angeles County Protocol for Public Demonstrations.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m an ordained minister thanks to the internet, so problem solved

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I think the irony is you and I could both go shop in a store, but we can’t hang out together in a park.

Dunstan

Pretty sure even that isn’t enough under the new order.

Mr. Ayo

Depends on the size of his dick.

Oh, and mask size.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I think it’ll fit through a hole in the mask, is that ok?

Mr. Ayo

Whatever it takes champ!

Dunstan

Yes. Even if you sat outdoors and wore masks.

However, if you and your friend would like to go shoe shopping together, you can do it to your heart’s content.

I realize they’re trying to do a cost-benefit analysis, but it’s really not about health any more. The rules are inconsistent, unless of course you interpret them through the lens of “what activities generate tax revenue.”

And the other stupid thing is that they don’t really get enforced. Have you seen or heard of anyone getting ticketed for not wearing a mask? Or violating any other rules? There’s a “party house” near my friend’s house that finally got shut down, and I think that was for violating zoning laws, not the COVID order.

Unsurprised

unless of course you interpret them through the lens of “what activities generate tax revenue.”

Or “What benefits our megacorporation donors.”

Gumbygirl

Woo, listen to the fancy pants with the real friends!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Internet friends can only go so far

Dunstan

I found the same problem with girls in high school.

Dunstan

Just watched Airplane! for the first time in quite a while. Surprised how well it holds up.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Surely you can’t be serious

Dunstan

I am serious, and don’t call me Shirley.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Nice beaver?

yeah right

I thought the same thing about Green Acres earlier.

It’s actually radio for the most part.

Sets are minimal and it’s just the dialogue.

It’s whip-crack delivered (editors job)

With none of them costly effects.

Dunstan

And for a film that drops a joke every ten seconds or so, there’s surprisingly few that have aged badly. Even the racial humor (like the guys speaking jive) is pretty innocent — it’s a little dated now, but not offensive.

yeah right

Let’s give a toast to our own Beer Guy Rob.

God speed on the rehab.

A shot might be required.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afQRpGiNGVc

yeah right

And we brought the party.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The party is a weird euphemism for booze and fleshlights

Gumbygirl

I’m watching some old lady renovating her Florida condo on DIY. Party animal!

TheRevanchist

I’m catching up on Dateline episodes! Woohoo!!!

Gumbygirl

If I watch that too close to bedtime I will have murder dreams. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Viva La Tabula Raza

When I sleep, I have a 50/50 chance of nice dreams or nightmares. For the last year, being awake is a 100% guarantee of nightmare.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIb6yIcRfsA

Gumbygirl

Pat Travers…Boom Boom Out Go the Lights?

Viva La Tabula Raza

I took five hits of blotter acid at the Texxas Jam, Cotton Bowl, August 1979 (“The Last Concert of the Last Weekend of the Last Summer of the Seventies”) and was getting off like a Saturn booster when PT started playing. It was a religious experience.

TEXXAS Jam – Cotton Bowl in Dallas (General Admission – $15.00) “A Farewell To A Texas Summer”


Note: Joan Jett did not show up.

Gumbygirl

5 hits of blotter, whoa! I went to high school with a kid who was selling blotter in the bathroom. A teacher came in, and he panicked and swallowed all of them. Chuck was never quite the same after that!

Last edited 3 years ago by Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

Actually, now that I think about it, it was purple microdot, not blotter.

yeah right

I did a 4 way hit of blotter at a Talking Heads concert in Long Beach. The guy who sold it to me backed away..

“You guys are nuts!”

Gumbygirl

Didn’t they call that 4 way stuff windowpane? It’s been a minute!

yeah right

Oh shit, I’m late.

Hi everybody!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hi, Dr. Nick!

yeah right

You’re going to beat the Lions right?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m not suiting up

yeah right

Smart man.

Mr. Ayo

Only for the losers!

Brick and I have a YUGE pile of snow we’re cutting into lines.

Grab a c-note, roll it up, and let’s party.

yeah right

Live from LA motherfuckers aren’t staying home.

yeah right

Yep. 10PM.

yeah right

I report this as a non-motherfucker who was home way before curfew.

Law and order every time.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

As all the northern canadian hobos know, scotch is quieter than beer

Last edited 3 years ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Mr. Ayo

That’s a bold strategy Ragin Cajuns.

Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

— B. Walsh

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Shit, i just remembered something i need to do tonight and I’m two beers in. At least they’re only (checks abv) 8.5% and 8.6%.

Mr. Ayo

See, if you were four beers in you wouldn’t have that problem.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Good advice for later

Horatio Cornblower

I hope that thing was to drink two more beers.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Done with the work thing, now trying to figure out if I can pour another drink without waking lady bfc

Doktor Zymm

There are a few things that BIG CHRISTIANITY hasn’t told you about Christmas

FB_IMG_1607143437561.jpg
Mr. Ayo

BIG CAT is an agent of evil, ppl forget that.

Dunstan

It turns out the wise men brought gifts of gold, frankensense, and purr.

litre_cola

So is the Rona ripping through refugee camps? I went from Stevie Ray Vaughn to world news. The folks from Tigray (I am sure they have a footy team Hippo has bet on), are refugees in Sudan. Escaping the violence being crucial, is the Rona there? You would think it would rip through a camp.

Doktor Zymm

Honestly hard to know considering the poor level of medical facilities and information leaving the camps

Horatio Cornblower

Rona is probably a secondary concern to things like cholera, at least in the immediate term.
/is not a doctor

Doktor Zymm

My understanding is that’s part of the issue, much harder to disambiguate cases/cause of death when there’s generally poor public health and no diagnostic facilities

Horatio Cornblower

Watching skeleton racing on the Olympic channel right now, and you have to be absolutely out of your mind to do this sport.

Mr. Ayo

And to think luge is actually more dangerous. RIP Nodar.

Horatio Cornblower

They’re both nuts. And then there’s two man luge, which is both degrading AND dangerous!

litre_cola

Or cozy.

Horatio Cornblower

I try not to judge.

Doktor Zymm

I would totally attend a mixed luge speed dating event

Doktor Zymm

I’ve been lugeing once, but it was just the bottom three corners on a day that was almost freezing so the ice was really slow and it’s really hard not to sit up so there’s lots of drag, and with all that I probably didn’t break 20 mph. Still fun (except for carrying the damn sled up the stairs), but not exactly the adrenaline rush of facefirst at 80 mph

Doktor Zymm

There must still be a go-go scene in DC, right? https://youtu.be/M_XNUwv6Y1o

Mr. Ayo

Of course. I’m just glad the original gogo scene gave us the boot.

Horatio Cornblower

My daughter just came home with empanadas. Holy Christ is this deliciously bad for me.

Mr. Ayo

I stopped reading at came.

Horatio Cornblower

Big Cory Chase fan, are you?

Mr. Ayo

Look, I had to google that. So, no.

herodotus450

(Crosses “Ted Cruz” off the list of possible alter egos for Mr. Ayo)
Well, we’ll just have to keep searching.

Don T

Hehe. This was today’s breakfast
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TheRevanchist

Ooh! Truly sexy Friday, right there.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is that pie filled enough to call it Cory Chase?

Unsurprised

I think all the time about how this claimant I had who had moved to another state, and whose separation I decided on, by the time she actually got her payments after a convoluted series of events I won’t go into, was working from home as a UI claims specialist for a third state.

I also think about how I have been directly responsible for feeding, clothing, and housing thousands of people and their households in the last eight month, which is more than any politician has done or will do.

I hate seeing people post about being unemployed here and not being able to help the way I can help people through my job. I was unemployed four 4.5 years between graduation and my job now and almost no one even did anything and the one guy who did saved my ass with some contract work and making me take initiative. I’ve talked to people who have worked for DECADES without break who had to claim and who were terrified, and all I could say was that they weren’t alone while trying to avoid saying “This won’t end soon and no one is going to save you.” And the CARES Act benefits end on December 26 because Congress is led by and almost entirely comprised of the worst people in the world.If you think things have been bad before, it will get worse. It will get a lot worse.

ANYWAY. I’m drunk. UI offices may be hiring, not just in your state but every state. It’s also something I’ve been thinking about because of this long email that I’ve been slowly working on all day to people who won’t read it or care.

Horatio Cornblower

It’s Friday night. Take a big step back and a night off. Hell, take the weekend off. You can’t go full tilt at the universe 24/7

litre_cola

I have gone down a Stevie Ray Vaughn rabbit hole. Died so young.

Horatio Cornblower

Vic Morrow winces in appreciation.

Viva La Tabula Raza

So do the little Vietnamese kids that died with him in the same crash.

herodotus450

At least his brother Mo Vaughn had a good run.

Mr. Ayo

Just had a flashback of my fantasy baseball team in 1997.

herodotus450

Pop quick hotshot: Pat Hentgen or Roger Clemens? WHO DO YOU CHOOSE!?

Mr. Ayo

I chose Pat back then.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Planes, man

litre_cola

He didn’t even know he was one of the best ever as he was so young. Planes man.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I saw SRV live three times, including the first time when I had never heard of him and saw him open for George Thorogood at the Ritz Theater in Corpus Christi in 1982. Shortly thereafter he recorded Let’s Dance with Bowie and the rest was history. What a talent.

Gumbygirl

Balls, were these New Order songs all used on movie soundtracks?

Last edited 3 years ago by Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

TV shows?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Old Order songs for radio shows?

litre_cola

I don’t even want to talk about the Germans new order.

Doktor Zymm

All these songs were on a gold DVD with episodes of ‘The Love Boat’ and embedded in the ice sheet of a comet for future generations of comet mining aliens to find?

Gumbygirl

The same movie soundtrack?

Gumbygirl

I think I have it now. They were all on a New Order tribute album, right?

Gumbygirl

They have the same title as a movie? I am determined to get this one!

Gumbygirl

Jesus, I’m exhausted from all of the Deep Thinking!

Mr. Ayo

Congrats!

I haven’t heard of any of these so called movies.

Horatio Cornblower

Watching a Netflix shows called ‘We Are The Champions’ and there’s an episode on a chili pepper eating contest set in Carolina and I am fully expecting to see tWBS wander past the camera at any second.

litre_cola

Oh Senor Weaselo mock everyone there!

Horatio Cornblower

13 rounds. Round 6 is the Carolina Reaper.

I’m in pain just watching.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

We’re watching Queen’s Gambit and then I just want to go to sleep before 9. Not gonna happen but tis an inclination.

Horatio Cornblower

That was really good.

litre_cola

Deadliest Roads docos on teh Youtube is definitely worth your time. If you are high/drunk/both and miss travelling to obscure places.

litre_cola

Deadliest journeys is ok, same genre but less anthropological.

Doktor Zymm

I’m scratching that itch by planning future trips. Kona, and the National Parks within 4 hrs drive of El Paso in Jan, Ecuador in Feb.

litre_cola

I really need that vaccine so I can go back to Scotland in June for the Euros. Been since 99 since they have been in a major tourney.

Doktor Zymm

Fingers crossed it’s in general distribution by then. Although the UK has been open to US residents, albeit with the 14 day quarantine, but there’s talk of reducing that, so you could go without the vaccine if you were personally comfortable with the risk

litre_cola

Wouldn’t risk it with 70 year old mom etc. Jab me, and I am back in the Tartan Army!

Horatio Cornblower

Tartan Army hell, you’ll be in Fulham’s starting back 4.

Doktor Zymm

Pre-pandemic there were apparently bullfights in the Central valley, as part of the large Azorean community there

Doktor Zymm

The part you’ll remember from Looney toons starts at 1:14
https://youtu.be/Tnue8UiEenU

Doktor Zymm

And the beer song for that matter

Mr. Ayo
Doktor Zymm

This one makes the Apocalypse Now scene seem significantly less bad ass: https://youtu.be/Yxiv3CBMS4M

herodotus450
WCS

I just want to point out that during Lil’er WCS’s music class today where it is all kid’s songs for 45 minutes, the teacher noticed my shirt. She pulled me aside, and said thiS;

“I like Tool, too.”

Dunstan

Dear Penthouse Forum….

Unsurprised

If you ever had any faith in these pieces of shit or think it matters that Trump lost, I fucking hate you.
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litre_cola

Ooooh more weed, wine and a New Order show.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’ve been to (I think) 2 bullfights. The first one my buddy caught an ear in the crowd. We didn’t really know if we were supposed to save it or what but he definitely brought it back to the hotel and put it on ice.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I think you’re supposed to eat the ear if you catch it. Immediately.

Gumbygirl

If I wanted to be around angry, tormented cattle I’d still be working at the Post Office.

litre_cola

Still do.

Doktor Zymm

You can only get criadillas de toro during bullfighting season. Otherwise you’ll have to settle for something lesser, like pig testicles

Doktor Zymm

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Last edited 3 years ago by Doktor Zymm
BrettFavresColonoscopy

No gracias

Doktor Zymm

They’re actually supposed to be delicious, but understand the hesitancy

Mr. Ayo

Rocky Mountain Oysters!

At least, that’s what they were called where I grew up. Even had a Testicle Festival around it.

Doktor Zymm

When they’re frozen on a stick it’s a testisicle!

Dunstan

I went to one. I don’t think I had quite appreciated before then just how sad the whole thing is. I mean, I knew they kill the bull in the end, but I didn’t quite put together how all the other dudes (too lazy to look up the terms and spellings) torment and exhaust and weaken and bleed the bull before the matador shows up.

I did, however, get to see a matador get gored, so the bulls didn’t get shut out.

Doktor Zymm

At the one I went to, the first couple guys had no issue with coup de gras, but the third guy required multiple strikes, and ended up having to go through the head. It was only maybe a quarter full, but the boos resounded.

Doktor Zymm

Aren’t the picadors partially supposed to make the bull charge straight? Something to do with the placement of the lances on the shoulders

Unsurprised

The matador probably would’ve like his ear back.

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
WCS

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Horatio Cornblower

Son of a bitch!

Don T

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Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve got everything I need, thanks.

Don T

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Doktor Zymm

What kind of gas mileage does the synth get?

Don T

Three Emerson Lake & Palmer shows

Viva La Tabula Raza

For a while, Keith Emerson had the largest organ in the world. Drove the ladies wild.

Don T

2nd largest.
-Rick Wakeman

Viva La Tabula Raza

Why, Yes!
I did qualify with “for a while.”

Gumbygirl

Gregg Allman knew what to do with his organ. Ask Cher.

Viva La Tabula Raza

There were some weird marriages/relationships in the 70s. Burt Reynolds/Dinah Shore. Peter Wolf/Faye Dunaway. Gregg Allman/Cher.

herodotus450

Unlike the keytar, the Duranthasizer never found an audience.

Unsurprised

This describes most lawyers I’ve known.
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SonOfSpam

She right about that.

SonOfSpam

Temptation
Age of Consent
Ceremony
Confusion
Regret
Crystal

THEME:

Balls crashes a local quinceanera?

Gumbygirl

Duh, the theme is…New Order!

Don T

Just exchanged serious insults with the Ex (2020-2020). She got the last word—about 50 of ‘em. And now comes the part where I’m truly excellent: not texting.
If TWBS were alive (pours club soda), I’d yell “Now THAT’S closure, amigo”.

Horatio Cornblower

You (don’t) tell her, Don!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

If tWBS was still here he’d be texting her

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWkMhCLkVOg&ab_channel=remhq

This was played on SiriusXM’s Classic Rewind today. I bought this CD when it came out.

I was having a good day, and now, I feel really old.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I bought Monster out of the cutout bin in 1995 when I was living in Houston. Not sure why it was in the cutout bin, and not sure why I was living in Houston..

SonOfSpam

The lesbian serial killer movie? Damn, that was hot.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Nah, the REM album. My time machine wasn’t operational in ’95.

SonOfSpam

(sigh) let me have my joke man

Viva La Tabula Raza

I still have this album, which I bought in 1970.comment image

Don T

I made the Top 25!
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Fronkenshteen

.

Last edited 3 years ago by Fronkenshteen
Mr. Ayo

The theme is New Order

Mr. Ayo
Gumbygirl

This is what happens when I show up late.

Mr. Ayo

No shame in being right even if you’re not the first.

Mr. Ayo

Oh, I know!

007!

Unsurprised

This week’s gallery, which is actually a few weeks’ worth. https://postimg.cc/gallery/pj8mHc2

Unsurprised

Hannah Ferguson (she’s also in that above gallery and the bodypaint pics are in the next folder, which is all Softcore (NSFW). This one is safe. Maxim, SI, etc.

https://pixxxels.cc/gallery/TPN6PTH

Unsurprised

Softcore (NSFW)

h

ttps://postimg.cc/gallery/16XMGkX

Unsurprised

This will be updated continuously as I get new titty pics.

Unsurprised

Syndney Sweeney as Cassie Howard in Euphoria (NSFW). HBO rules. They really know how to cast hot women willing to get naked.

h

ttps://pixxxels.cc/gallery/3vs6BYx

Unsurprised

AOC. I’m not sure why I made this but it’s been sitting in my archive.

https://pixxxels.cc/gallery/hnx3vxS

Unsurprised

Susan Sarandon being a big-titty MILF

https://pixxxels.cc/gallery/dqg4T4h

Unsurprised

I have a bunch of MP4 videos saved that are also on redgifs or gfycat or imgur. And I have a bunch of gifs over 10 MB, many of which are just crappier versions of said MP4 videos. I don’t really want to organize them into DFO, NSFW, duplicates, and “You don’t get to see these.”

Mr. Ayo

See you guys Sunday!

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jjfozz

The Eldest Fozz Spawn contributed this to Sexy Friday
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Sharkbait

Amazing.

Don T

Vow of obedience ✔️

Doktor Zymm

The elf is giving you some serious side eye for your voyeurism there ?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Falwell Jr. approves from the corner of the room.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I chuckled out loud

Gumbygirl

Raising him right, Fozz!