Your Very Last NFL Monday Night Football Thread

Just a reminder that there’s a double-header on Saturday and then an avalanche of tilts next Sunday.

Fallout:

-I keep coming back to this but here we go again. The Vikes, in the first three quarters of all games this year have a point differential of -97. If I had my druthers I’d prefer the Giants play these guys rather than the Niners, even though Jefferson will tear us apart.

-That Pickett’s Charge Joke has Legs: The rook qb now has two game winning drives in consecutive weeks right there in his back pocket. The once 6-8 Steelers are still only mostly dead.

-Speaking of surprises, Dobbs gets the start next week vs the Jags. Will he get a Game Sock if he plays well?

-I Sense a Theme: Maybe perhaps Brock Purdy should have been drafted earlier than the 7th round. I do snort at internet fellas that are adamant about this player or that need to be drafted to my team when front offices with much more resources at hand can’t get it right.

-The Not-Goth QB was the Right Call: Stidham’s TD 60 yard pass to Davante was the first toss on a scramble play that the Raiders have had all year.

To The Game!

Bills/Bengals:

-Gamblor Alert-Cincy is 12-3 against the spread this year.

-A Little More Knox Perhaps: Allen has a fancy-schmancy 102.9 passer rating when throwing the ball Dawson’s Way.

-Someone that Allen isn’t meshing with is Gabe Davis-he was expected to take a big step forward this year but is being held back by a rancid 55% catch rate.

-Though Cook and Singletary have been unreliable (for those folks that play fantasy, that is) the Bills are the only team to run for 100+ yards in each game this year.

-Despite not having many known guys (outside of Ohio, I guess) the Cincy D is 9th in points allowed (20.4) and 7th in rushing yards allowed. (106.4)

-Keep your eye on Trenton Irwin-he could easily have had the TD hat-trick last week. Boyd’s finger is almost a non-issue.

It’s all yours.

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Don T

I just turned in the game. Is this an alternate universe where players are treated as humans?

Redshirt

Also, the fans applauding both teams. No one wants to continue.

Brocky

On a lighter note:

For the second year in a row, Rutgers has knocked off unbeaten #1 purdue

Get fucked boilermakers. The 76 undefeated hurrying hoosiers is one of the last things my dad has in this world. I won’t want to see that record tarnished before he passes

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Roger Goodell right now, referring to the players:

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Redshirt

You son of a bitch, I don’t feel like laughing.

Spur

That’s the right thing. Pause this game for now. postpone until tomorrow, aren’t shit happening tomorrow in Cincy or Buffalo tomorrow

King Hippo

It’s also a SAFETY issue. They can’t play with their minds where they are.

SonOfSpam

Just heard the first “puts things in perspective” comment

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Petronel

Good. Nobody’s in a position to play right now.

King Hippo

The coaches called it off. They’re not going to play.

Horatio Cornblower

It certainly looked like Buffalo’s coach had no intention of coming back out.

Doktor Zymm

Watch the NFL fine them for being decent human beings.

Redshirt

Both teams forfeit at the same time. Call it a draw.

And my team has the lead!!!!!!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If this game somehow gets canceled/drawn and Kansas City gets a free pass to the bye and home field advantage, I will…hmm, probably not a good time to make a joke about what my reaction would be.

Horatio Cornblower

If they restart the game I’ll be turning it off.

You can hear the announcers, in the studio and on the field, are trying not to cry.

Doktor Zymm

I’ve already turned it off. They said they’re giving them 5 minutes to warm up. Who fucking cares about the game now.

Brocky

He is. There’s no kinda there

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I just watched the play where he got injured. Looked like an untouched soccer player the way he collapsed.

SonOfSpam

Had a Hank Gathers feel.

litre_cola

Didnt know whether to plus this or minus this

SonOfSpam

I remember the video when he collapsed. Just terrifying.

litre_cola

Was soooo bad. I was quite young and it scarred.

Horatio Cornblower

“frantically administering CPR”

Oh that’s reassuring.

Petronel

Not a medical professional, but from what I understand about CPR, the guy now probably has at least several cracked/broken ribs, etc. I just hope that’s all he’ll have to deal with.

Horatio Cornblower

Jesus Christ, they cannot restart the game.

SonOfSpam

You really don’t understand the NFL apparently.

SonOfSpam

Happy to be wrong! And used to it!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh, they will.

Horatio Cornblower

You’re probably right. Unfortunately.

litre_cola

Wife said money talks.

Redshirt

Don’t pull an Owen Hart and continue like WWF did. If Buffalo and Cincinnati meet in the playoffs, play it at a neutral site.

Spur

yeah. postpone until tomorrow

litre_cola

In better news, MATRON SAINT!

litre_cola

Just had to explain to my wife this…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc65NC44dSk

King Hippo

Call it a tie, send everyone home please.

SonOfSpam

I can hear Goodell scoff from here.

Gumbygirl

This guy may be dead. Jesus Christ. He went down all stiff legged, like an electrical shock. Horrible.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Nice job with the ads, ESPN. Because the one thing people want to see more of when there’s a player literally dying on the field is MORE FOOTBALL HIGHLIGHTS!

Redshirt

The hit didn’t look that bad.

Horatio Cornblower

No, nothing unusual about it at all.

Doktor Zymm

Christ, CPR. If he dies on the field and they continue the game I’m done with football.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The NFL would never, not in a million years, acknowledge that he died on the field. They will say it was in the ambulance or at the hospital.

SonOfSpam

Oh shit, they’ve been doing CPR.

This is horrible.

Recovery Whiskey

For over five minutes which isn’t good at all

Spur

Giving CPR?

Doktor Zymm

Reminds me of that soccer player

clint greasewood

Christian Eriksonn

Brocky

Chuck Hughes was the lions player who died

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I was thinking of the same thing.

Redshirt

…I’m legitimately frightened for him.

Brocky

So me and pops are watching the end of purdue/rutgers, (my dad is bitching at the refs)

What happened?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Nothing obvious. He made a tackle, stood back up, and immediately collapsed again. Since then it’s been an escalating medical response.

Mr. Ayo

Hamlin got hurt making a tackle. Been down at least 10 minutes. CPR being administered, ambulance on the field.

Petronel

Took a hit in the upper chest-ish, got up for a second, then fell back over.

Hope that this isn’t another case of a hit to the chest causing heart issues, but given the mention of CPR…we’ll have to wait and see.

SonOfSpam

“Looks like a sore back”

-Dolphins’ medical staff

litre_cola

Oh that’s good.

Brocky

God damn you for making me laugh like this

SonOfSpam

I hate myself more than usual.

Petronel

…this is very bad.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Good, that does not look.

Mr. Ayo

He’s just having a fainting session.

Someone get him those smelling salts.

Doktor Zymm

Well that don’t look good

litre_cola

He was up and then out. Adrenaline?

Brocky

Speak for yourself

Spur

in Aikman’s defense, he doesn’t remind he used to throw a ball them for a living.

Spur

Evening Folks

Redshirt

Yeah, wait that not Chase?!

This is what sports gaming is? Being disappointed my team scored because it’s the wrong guy?!

King Hippo

#ItGetsBetter*

*this is a complete lie

SonOfSpam

This is why I was happy when Commiefornia didn’t pass either Gamblor bill

TheRevanchist

It’s early still. Hang in there.

Spur

Wasnt he Aquaman?
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SonOfSpam

Yes, in that movie where Aquaman was a tiny pussy.

litre_cola

Burrow is dialed in.

King Hippo

Trying to recall the last time the AFC had three QBs this good. Maybe briefly with Elway, Kelly, Marino?

But I think all 3 of Mahomes, Burrow, Brokeback are better

SonOfSpam

really it’s a quartet seems you forgot about WHITE MAC

King Hippo

His Legend speaks for itself (speaking of cracking the whip)

King Hippo

88 be all liek DEEEEEZ NUTS!!

TheRevanchist

If you didn’t want to be disappointed, you shouldn’t have went to Utah.

Not just the school, but the state.

Col. Duke LaCross

No shit. And I’ve lived here for 44 years.

/Probably moving to New York soon

litre_cola

Where in Nuevo York?

Col. Duke LaCross

Probably Westchester County someplace. The lady wants to move back and I don’t want to lose her.

litre_cola

EH, you are from Utah. NY winters are just more humid.

Senor Weaselo

Caucasian Plains area? I went to Purchase for my undergrad and I have much better memories than Senorita Weaselo, who went after I got out of there.

SonOfSpam

Sounds expensive, what with the four wives and all.

Brocky

Evening all.

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I just want to remind you all that I only know about this film from you folks talking about it.

I hate to sound disparaging, but that one “older user” who’s name escapes me.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Brick?

/ducks

TheRevanchist

This does look like something Brick would wear while taking apart ‘40 Ford V8 engine.

litre_cola

And flying a drone that is filming it all.

Brocky

I want to say the name was tab Rosa?

Does that ring a bell for anyone?

King Hippo

oh yeah, we think he has passed into Valhalla

Brocky

A Google search shows Viva La Tabula Raza.

I wished I had more one on one conversations, if he truly has passed

Gumbygirl

I miss him.

litre_cola

He was a good man. RTD and I emailed him and no response.

Gumbygirl

I know you did, you guys rock. He was having health problems, but I’m thinking it was a sudden event, like a heart attack or something. Sucks, early 60’s is too damn young.

litre_cola

What do you mean start dressing like this? So much support.

ballsofsteelandfury

Honestly, I’d wear the shit out of that!

litre_cola

Depends on the beach. I mean that seriously.

litre_cola

Edit, not the boots.

Spur

Open Carry – check
Loin cloth with bandier – check
Knee length boots – check

Is the body hair optional? Asking for a friend.

ballsofsteelandfury

I would hope so because I have very little.

Redshirt

What do you think I’m wearing?

Downfield Matriculator

So . . . the wildly overrated James Franklin getting gifted a Rose Bowl victory after Cam Rising got hurt is bad enough, but what is with the fugly “S” hat he chose to wear — Is that for Sandusky?

Last edited 1 year ago by Downfield Matriculator
Recovery Whiskey

Guessing “State”. “State of denial” not ruled out

Downfield Matriculator

Given the weather in Pasadena, I suppose we should have all expected Penn State to be dangerous in the showers

litre_cola

Wife and son in Bengals jerseys.

Spur

aren’t you a bird family?

Redshirt

I did a thing:

C3AFCED5-920D-44A3-83A1-3AC9F7A0B694.jpeg
litre_cola

I have Burrow 2 tds, Cinci+3.5, Over.

King Hippo

I did at least finish a book today, Take THAT, Lea Michelle!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do we really have to get back to work tomorrow?

Mr. Ayo

I got up and went to work today. Then I got to the office and realized I didn’t have work today. So then I did some work.

Worst. Monday. Ever.

King Hippo

you have a freezer vodka stash in office, at least?

Mr. Ayo

Of course.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s hilarious

King Hippo

I need a plan to hide.

Doktor Zymm

You don’t HAVE to do anything, but most people seem to like the part about getting paid

Senor Weaselo

Where do we complain about SNF being Lions-Packers, here? Good.

Gumbygirl

Frozen Tundra. You had to know it would happen. The Shield is determined to get Rodgers another ring. Fuck him, fuck them. Fuck. Go Liouns!

Horatio Cornblower

God knows they can rely on Dallas to let them through at least one round of the play-offs.

/eats the lead paint off my windows

King Hippo

I only watch if Seattle loses (making it “win and in” for DET as well). Collinsworth is gonna have a sore throat for weeks after that game, at least.

King Hippo

quickly?

Dunstan

That’s what she said. But I was just nervous!

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