It is a new day. Maybe not a great one, but a new one.
The apocalypse of creative and funny versus corporate and restrictive mutually-assured destruction occurred, and now we find ourselves naked and bruised but definitely not alone navigating this nuclear winter. Rather than licking our wounds over what had been, let us appreciate what we have. Take stock in possibilities. Out of destruction, we have the humor and the sincerity of truly witty and brilliant friends brought together through the rubble, through the ash, to make fun of yet another season and to share our lives along the way. We will mourn our friends lost and fallen heroes, but it is our responsibility to marshal on.
…. And to endlessly jeer the ‘Boys—and Horatio in the process—for things like Romo missing practice camp Friday and being questionable for today on account of treatment for a sty. The Romophobe is off to beginning this season’s camp with a whimper and not a bang thanks to (what I am assuming) is a horrible and disfiguring eyelid pimple. (Ha, take that for everyone who had him out in Game 11 with disc compression!) I just hope that it hasn’t impeded the good works of artsy-craftsy Romo. For those unfamiliar, this is a sty, albeit, not the best of artistic renderings.
Channel your inner or outer foot fetishist. Embrace our new society without pants. We don’t have to be up for# whatever here. So let’s start sharing our toothpaste, toilet paper, and cans of Cream of Mushroom and make the new era our era. Let our doors fly open!
It is a new day. It may not be a great one, but it is our day.
So… HOW THE FUCK YOU DOIN’ BOYS?
WHOA, IT’S LATE. THIS WOULD EXPLAIN A FEW THINGS…………
Derp. Chillin’ now.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/bea1234ca76179a5486927a9867d5876/tumblr_nekktxrI8y1rc7zl1o1_400.gif
http://41.media.tumblr.com/4dc7f43770ac9d65b1baf5af5543fcd3/tumblr_nitoxhDZkZ1r9ged7o1_500.jpg
http://38.media.tumblr.com/e90ce2a66c09501741ffe34cb9225569/tumblr_nqq7dfDsaB1qixedeo1_400.gif
http://31.media.tumblr.com/7376cd0380a1894d5ee48acd9927fb8e/tumblr_nqq7dfDsaB1qixedeo4_400.gif
http://38.media.tumblr.com/071ddb118c42e2af7e7f0683a9538db5/tumblr_nsa3ikOKMc1tauas6o2_500.gif
The Transit of Venus.
http://31.media.tumblr.com/ddcddf5c48e98440b5ac789b68942093/tumblr_nrrqfvaKDK1rcfi9jo1_r1_500.gif
It’s a little late and I’m starting to hallucinate.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/10df5ced4867a042bc41e0141ae60dd9/tumblr_nrnjwrQkW51sh3iebo1_500.gif
Batboner.
http://33.media.tumblr.com/d091b9a1de7e9bf5b9aff6bf1c787781/tumblr_n9lu3mhUnx1qzk2apo1_500.gif
While I’m not big on Zionism, this is pretty good. More of a mellow IPA:
http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/262/103285/
http://www.ratebeer.com/beer/hebrew-death-of-a-contract-brewer/220046/
May the Shmaltz be with you.
http://beerstreetjournal.com/wp-content/uploads/Hebrew-Death-of-a-Contract-Brewer-.jpg
You know when your mom warned you and you didn’t listen.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/6f79b220eaad9704286132bb18dec6ba/tumblr_nsew42LZvM1u2jwbho1_400.gif
Continued.
http://31.media.tumblr.com/5ec0bcce258e25beedc8847f332833f9/tumblr_nsf0ngUug71s2yegdo1_500.gif
http://33.media.tumblr.com/7e56ef75de2cd96741ef085e53ec5c59/tumblr_mrqvx2IkyM1qdie0jo1_500.gif
I know your mom warned you not to drive a Wennieboat (TM) around, but you were not paying attention….. .
http://40.media.tumblr.com/b220ad9843518dfa3ca916343307d573/tumblr_n0yijp62Wk1qam8b5o1_500.jpg
For those IPAers this is pretty good. Strong, bold.
http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/158/123363/
Dericious.
http://www.ratebeer.com/beer/great-divide-showdown-rye-ipa/274095/
http://thefullpint.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Great-Divide-Showdown-Rye-IPA.jpg
It’s like a li’l fren.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/8cfe3d618f5d9cc3385c563a61665ff4/tumblr_nc6a8i7UWB1rrphlpo1_1280.jpg
I love teaching, with the exception of the students.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRCkLyYl1pk
http://33.media.tumblr.com/6e2aa94d6675554418be26e04f32efaf/tumblr_mfhp97id8W1r9uzkco1_500.gif
Watching some Aussie Rules Football on TV. Really cool stuff.
Three weeks off between Summer Semester and the beginning of Fall? Make it worthwhile. Trust me, kids. I’m a professor.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imWnuirIL8o
http://38.media.tumblr.com/c95f178a06e224441722f58c82f2e2ad/tumblr_nazg4sMMtJ1qe4ru4o3_500.gif
3 a.m and just about to nod off. Halfway through Wet Hot: First Day. I think I like it? What say anyone else?
But goddamn, Showalter looks like shit.
Are we stilling posting music? I don’t care. Here, enjoy, ya jizzstains.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMedTmZKo38
Pretty damn good weekend thus far. Saw Aliens in a theater while munching on popcorn and drinking a pitcher of some kind of red ale. That movie is still fucking fantastic. Followed it up today with a few board games with friends, then to a BBQ featuring home brewed brew.
Finally watched The Raid the other night, and now my wife is bugging me to watch The Raid 2 tonight.
Why yes, she does hate “chick-flicks.”
Do so. Immediately.
Immediately.
You are a lucky man.
Marry h…Oh, never mind. Carry on.
Snow White & The Seven Dwarfs Are Slaughtered One At a Time
http://41.media.tumblr.com/58734489210ab229c892d344d3226d83/tumblr_nrghsir6ES1u93f8so1_500.jpg
Today in handsome mutha fucker.
Saw this move the other day with Gregory Peck.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/b9c35572c63f268ef214de93ff3b67ec/tumblr_nbg3var2AE1r8oez8o1_500.jpg
Don’t fuck with Pirate Cat.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/140a9f7ee0e9b0dfe56c0c38678dddd7/tumblr_mquy9loPDK1qi9lyqo1_1280.jpg
Had dinner with my – technically – fiance (we’re supposed to get married in another 7-8 years). Taught her oldest daughter a few standard guitar chords, you know the standard EAGD exchanges and had an overall great day. It’s not bad to have filet mignon two out of three weeks with a baseball game sandwiched in between is it?
I may have to rethink my Sunday Gravy post after that. Who am I kidding? I’m bringing in my fastball tomorrow.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TJC48BRBn8
This works with Moose’s pancake gif. It’s hypnotic.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/84647a9096b20ea15504c388372b2ff6/tumblr_ns2z6fU95M1qht42zo2_1280.jpg
No worries; nothing was in the bottle.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/16074663dd57f4e9351b9da32f33a333/tumblr_nsb3x2QBqM1ubiau5o2_500.gif
I’d hit that…and miss.
Bring the food porn over……
http://40.media.tumblr.com/8926fc4af8efe1c06f16cf02f117c451/tumblr_nq1zdzivdB1s2j0zlo1_1280.jpg
Niece’s birthday went off without a hitch.
Platypus Evolution Breakfast was a fantastic success.
See y’all tomorrowish.
So pancakes in the morning?
http://38.media.tumblr.com/16b4005b05db660100aa7991e6f89099/tumblr_nrbh8i22gR1tezjkso9_500.gif
http://31.media.tumblr.com/a0f7a9813e492d6caeef7a689d9c11c0/tumblr_nrwzf0cKk21s2wio8o5_500.gif
I make some awesome pancakes but I cannot compete with this.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/7bfc632fa977b14d9467b30f98f8d898/tumblr_ns0lhv6WgD1qjcdw9o3_1280.jpg
http://multiversitystatic.s3.amazonaws.com/uploads/2013/10/Archie-Makes-Ace-Pancakes.jpg
FUCK YEAH!
I’m already quite drunk, but I have found my way to a bar with a great jukebox and fantastic whiskey selection. How do I maximize my experience before blacking out and hopefully waking up near home?
Sip the whiskey. Find Rolling Stones songs on the juke and dance to them. Alternate water with the whiskey. Play pool. Call a cab.
Vaya con Dios.
Drink a water between drinks, get some crappy bar food and keep pumping in the quarters.
I drink water and it helps tremendously, at least one to one.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/18f729109f7832f5d52f6bf55d8dc60f/tumblr_nmkpayHE461sek8pqo4_1280.jpg
Here you go. Sip easy and water back as our man Horatio says.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvpMeq_4BPM
The Stones could have stopped after Exile and still been an all-time band.
They should have used the sax more often. It works so well.
Pound for pound one of the greatest albums ever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lNP-x94-SE
http://i.imgur.com/kFqzQs5.gif
Kellen Winslow, Jr., ladies and gentlemen!
Doesn’t look like a Target parking lot.
THE BEN LOVE FUN TIME TWO WHEEL CAR WITHOUT WINDOWS BUT IT HURTS HEAD SPOT. HARF HARF HATF.
And I meant every word of that.
Your best comment ever.
She is not only hilarious, but DAMN
https://instagram.com/p/53BLs8vTC8/
I would have sex with her like you read about.
I’m assuming everyone here likes to read aboot a lot of pathetic lies.
:gently knocks on door:
Is this where we’re drinking tonight?
Tonight’s tally, (chiefly due to an unexpected horseshoe tournament)(runner-up if your scoring at home)
3 Captain’s Daughters Double IPAs http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/27710/140460/
recommended by the guy who owns the package store 100 yards from my house. Not sure what this says about me.
1 Sculpin 22 oz.
http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/199/29619/
Not an overall favorite of mine but very, very good and very hard to beat in hot weather.
1 Flying Dog Snake Dog IPA
http://flyingdogbrewery.com/?beers=snake-dog-ipa
Overall consensus is that the Captain’s Daughter is a decent find and worth drinking again, Sculpin is fantastic during the summer but probably not a year round beer, Flying Dog makes interesting beers but not quite up to being put in the regular rotation, and none of them are up to the Lagunitas Lil’ Sumpin Extra that I put back in the cooler when the owner of the package store suggested the Captains’s Daughter.
Can’t blame anyone for suggesting a new beer though. Because believe you me, I am #upforwhateverdoesn’tinvolveBudLight.
Nicely done, sir. I’m just plowing through the Lagavulin tonight.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/1e18ee2fde8a2a89127aad500dc63696/tumblr_nothryw4P21tyyu1ao1_1280.jpg
MOOOOOOOOSE – these herbs are super crunchy
That’s so good I’m going to have to steal it.
If you have so much in common, just go with it….
http://36.media.tumblr.com/776f91f1653abe1e9d016dcb7a9adb81/tumblr_nqg4fyUj8k1rnbekgo1_1280.jpg
http://33.media.tumblr.com/8bee6672d10d0f35d0bda79f1c1c66be/tumblr_nme8kksl401uq2n6jo1_400.gif
/jealous of limber kitten
//takes another NSAID
I am going with some steak and vegastables on the side from the farmers’ market (wonders if they use Farmersonly dot com for haystack hook-ups).
What be you cookin’ tonight?
http://38.media.tumblr.com/71fa03457809e430930697f1d5c77cb9/tumblr_nmhpb2wYj31u2602to1_500.gif
http://38.media.tumblr.com/f17da4c93613fb2b2bcaedf27a64ca9d/tumblr_mkojj4xo8s1qhansmo2_r1_400.gif
http://33.media.tumblr.com/46c99481b0171d99de6b009f46bcda6d/tumblr_mkojj4xo8s1qhansmo6_r1_400.gif
http://31.media.tumblr.com/e8b3a3eb074dac1a8ad7f60e521b7836/tumblr_mkojj4xo8s1qhansmo7_r1_400.gif
http://31.media.tumblr.com/b00398cad6111546b2765091863e74eb/tumblr_mkojj4xo8s1qhansmo8_r1_400.gif
These are awesome. And explain so much.
Unfortunately, probably heating up leftovers. Good, though.
Burgers on the grill. Then to buddy’s house for chicken marinated in Asian herbs of some kind and a ridiculous venison sausage.
I feel a breeze, do you feel a breeze?
http://40.media.tumblr.com/2a61a7ff35340a0f976b19dd86c44a83/tumblr_nnbu43waCF1qfbon7o1_1280.jpg
http://31.media.tumblr.com/2ae613c1cbd8c2bfdc4cfe6879c9fa35/tumblr_nl4fa8l0vd1qzhvd4o1_r1_400.gif
https://youtu.be/mojJSYSjP18
Wahhhh? This was meant to be High School Confidential by Rough Trade. Weird.
Dare I say it? Can it be? Do you want it? Do you want it bad? Are you open to experimentation and variation of the usual? Will you get used to it and expect it all the time? It cut hurt along with the pleasure you know.
What am I speaking of? In your heart you know what it is and you know you want it.
The question is: IS THIS THE OPEN THREAD FOR SATURDAY AUGUST FIRST TWOTHOUSANDFIFTEEN???
Hell yes.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/c4202b4a71e597423fa62f5f78bece68/tumblr_nsbevrdBCQ1s4el99o1_1280.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/6a43496ec0d5826fd7b8b35518555625/tumblr_ns9wziusJQ1szxmu6o2_1280.jpg
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/t_original/19e044yem88ftgif.gif
Well thank Christ THAT made the transition to the new klubhouse….
I owe you a big thanks friend.
Any more and I might develop a psychological dependence.
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/082009/1250499942_tree_branch_saw_fail.gif
Kind of how we all feel right now.
I mean, sure, I’m alive, but what’s the point?
I guess I’ll just have to get used to the taste of homemade dick jokes…
Sill was planning a lovely murder/suicide pact for us all to celebrate the new NFL season in WICHITA. Perhaps they can meet the enhanced space needs of the enlarged DFO Kommunity?
I think there might be a better place in Moose’s neck of the woods:
http://southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com/shared/locations/airport-hilton.jpg
Well, you are going to need to order the molding kit and…..
WAIT, err…..
Jokes, yeah! HAHA!
I’m not going to lie to you-I get loaded faster than a WordPress page.
Everything just seems… off… today.
https://youtu.be/l56Hdjx0ckg
Speaking of post-apocalyptic adjustments, shouldn’t someone update this to reflect the death of KSK:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kissing_Suzy_Kolber
I like how one of the sources starts the citation with “Ape, Christmas”
What are these “pants” that you speak of?
All I can remember about last night is giving a guest lecture at Villanova. Or maybe it was a street corner…?
Common mistake.
/ducks soup can thrown by Nova-grad brother in law.
BUUURRRRNNNN
http://files.shroomery.org/files/07-19/859936327-insult_master.jpg
Sadly I think it was Penn State.
if by “lecture” he meant “showered with a 10 year-old”
/slowly rolls off the couch as the light of the day assaults his eyes
Where am I, why am I wearing only a tutu, and what is drawn all over my face?
My guesses: the river, beer, and a penis. Not necessarily in that order.
Goddamn river.
Can you just look around and see if you can see my van.
Spray painted windows, two grey primer fenders, a Darwin sticker, etc.
Covalent, your bloomies are showing! Well, your two team preview posts are up. Somehow you “privately” published them, but I can see them. You may want to take them down. The post, not your bloomies. Unless you want to. It’s a free country.
Aaaaa! Fuck. I’m in Mexico at moment! Delete them if you can or I will get to them when I am through lecturing! Fuck!
Soooooooo sorry!
No worries! I’ll set them as scheduled to publish.
Looks like you took them down already. Enjoy Mexico!
Thanks for looking into that!!!!
Oh it’s just the epidemiology course I teach weekly.
I swear one day I will grasp publishing at a later date!
Two words:
Donkey. Show.
My new goal in life is to win the lottery and open a bar called…wait for it…The Yellow Bar.
You’re all invited.
And that bar shall only serve craft beers and cocktails that we have discussed here. That will be GLORIOUS!
Only problem with the Yellow Bar is that once you place your order, no changing it.
Bill Parcells has a name for a yellow bar.
Bahl?
And you will be known as the Yellow King.
[BAR FLIES OPEN]
[IMMEDIATELY PACKED WITH COLDPLAY FANS AND GOLDEN SHOWER FANS]
Hora too: I’ve made a terrible mistake.
Hora too? I’m not even going to fix that.
The fuck? No bar of mine will EVER be packed with Coldplay fans.
The golden showers? Eh, I don’t judge; just take it outside freaks.
Does this mean we are now required to komment naked? Cuz I’m ok with that.
We weren’t before?
Also, Romo is clearly exhibiting poor eye discipline.
Huzzah! VIVA LA PANTLESS REVOLUCION!
http://jogos2p.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/grim-fandango-salvador-limones-viva-la-revolucion_.jpg
I have a slightly different cause.
http://www.onderka.com/wp-content/che.png
OMG Grim Fandango! I bought the remastered version and fell in love again.
https://youtu.be/1srzsTJOW2c
Romo’s injury is fairly minor, so I expect it’ll only cause Darren McFadden to miss a couple of games.
Bravo! A brave, pants-less dawn for all! I shall take to the streets to spread word of this good news!
/is immediately arrested