After the Yellow Bar

It is a new day. Maybe not a great one, but a new one.

The apocalypse of creative and funny versus corporate and restrictive mutually-assured destruction occurred, and now we find ourselves naked and bruised but definitely not alone navigating this nuclear winter. Rather than licking our wounds over what had been, let us appreciate what we have. Take stock in possibilities. Out of destruction, we have the humor and the sincerity of truly witty and brilliant friends brought together through the rubble, through the ash, to make fun of yet another season and to share our lives along the way.  We will mourn our friends lost and fallen heroes, but it is our responsibility to marshal on.

webcomic+cats+apocalypse
It is how the cat do…

…. And to endlessly jeer the ‘Boys—and Horatio in the process—for things like Romo missing practice camp Friday and being questionable for today on account of treatment for a sty. The Romophobe is off to beginning this season’s camp with a whimper and not a bang thanks to (what I am assuming) is a horrible and disfiguring eyelid pimple. (Ha, take that for everyone who had him out in Game 11 with disc compression!) I just hope that it hasn’t impeded the good works of artsy-craftsy Romo.  For those unfamiliar, this is a sty, albeit, not the best of artistic renderings.

Sty
If you were a neckless hunchback with a moth-eaten mustache… and had a sty…

Channel your inner or outer foot fetishist.  Embrace our new society without pants.  We don’t have to be up for# whatever here.  So let’s start sharing our toothpaste, toilet paper, and cans of Cream of Mushroom and make the new era our era.   Let our doors fly open!

It’s a white-linen sort of apocalypse that I have in mind…

It is a new day.  It may not be a great one, but it is our day.

So… HOW THE FUCK YOU DOIN’ BOYS?

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There are worse things than frying an egg naked, but few things that will scald your tummy as much.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

WHOA, IT’S LATE. THIS WOULD EXPLAIN A FEW THINGS…………

Derp. Chillin’ now.

http://38.media.tumblr.com/bea1234ca76179a5486927a9867d5876/tumblr_nekktxrI8y1rc7zl1o1_400.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Beastmode Ate My Baby

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

While I’m not big on Zionism, this is pretty good. More of a mellow IPA:

http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/262/103285/

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I know your mom warned you not to drive a Wennieboat (TM) around, but you were not paying attention….. .

http://40.media.tumblr.com/b220ad9843518dfa3ca916343307d573/tumblr_n0yijp62Wk1qam8b5o1_500.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

For those IPAers this is pretty good. Strong, bold.

http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/158/123363/

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

I love teaching, with the exception of the students.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRCkLyYl1pk

Croooow

Watching some Aussie Rules Football on TV. Really cool stuff.

WCS

Three weeks off between Summer Semester and the beginning of Fall? Make it worthwhile. Trust me, kids. I’m a professor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imWnuirIL8o

kushiro

3 a.m and just about to nod off. Halfway through Wet Hot: First Day. I think I like it? What say anyone else?

But goddamn, Showalter looks like shit.

WCS

Are we stilling posting music? I don’t care. Here, enjoy, ya jizzstains.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMedTmZKo38

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Pretty damn good weekend thus far. Saw Aliens in a theater while munching on popcorn and drinking a pitcher of some kind of red ale. That movie is still fucking fantastic. Followed it up today with a few board games with friends, then to a BBQ featuring home brewed brew.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Finally watched The Raid the other night, and now my wife is bugging me to watch The Raid 2 tonight.

Why yes, she does hate “chick-flicks.”

laserguru

Do so. Immediately.
Immediately.

ballsofsteelandfury

You are a lucky man.

Horatio Cornblower

Marry h…Oh, never mind. Carry on.

WCS
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Today in handsome mutha fucker.

Saw this move the other day with Gregory Peck.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/b9c35572c63f268ef214de93ff3b67ec/tumblr_nbg3var2AE1r8oez8o1_500.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
laserguru

Had dinner with my – technically – fiance (we’re supposed to get married in another 7-8 years). Taught her oldest daughter a few standard guitar chords, you know the standard EAGD exchanges and had an overall great day. It’s not bad to have filet mignon two out of three weeks with a baseball game sandwiched in between is it?

I may have to rethink my Sunday Gravy post after that. Who am I kidding? I’m bringing in my fastball tomorrow.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TJC48BRBn8

laserguru

This works with Moose’s pancake gif. It’s hypnotic.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Horatio Cornblower

I’d hit that…and miss.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Sill Bimmons

Niece’s birthday went off without a hitch.

Platypus Evolution Breakfast was a fantastic success.

See y’all tomorrowish.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Horatio Cornblower

I make some awesome pancakes but I cannot compete with this.

ballsofsteelandfury

FUCK YEAH!

Doktor Zymm

I’m already quite drunk, but I have found my way to a bar with a great jukebox and fantastic whiskey selection. How do I maximize my experience before blacking out and hopefully waking up near home?

Horatio Cornblower

Sip the whiskey. Find Rolling Stones songs on the juke and dance to them. Alternate water with the whiskey. Play pool. Call a cab.

Vaya con Dios.

Cuntler

Drink a water between drinks, get some crappy bar food and keep pumping in the quarters.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I drink water and it helps tremendously, at least one to one.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/18f729109f7832f5d52f6bf55d8dc60f/tumblr_nmkpayHE461sek8pqo4_1280.jpg

laserguru

Here you go. Sip easy and water back as our man Horatio says.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvpMeq_4BPM

Horatio Cornblower

The Stones could have stopped after Exile and still been an all-time band.

laserguru

They should have used the sax more often. It works so well.

Pound for pound one of the greatest albums ever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lNP-x94-SE

Brick Meathook
WCS

Kellen Winslow, Jr., ladies and gentlemen!

Horatio Cornblower

Doesn’t look like a Target parking lot.

Cuntler

THE BEN LOVE FUN TIME TWO WHEEL CAR WITHOUT WINDOWS BUT IT HURTS HEAD SPOT. HARF HARF HATF.

Brick Meathook

Brick Meathook

And I meant every word of that.

Horatio Cornblower

Your best comment ever.

ballsofsteelandfury

She is not only hilarious, but DAMN

https://instagram.com/p/53BLs8vTC8/

Horatio Cornblower

I would have sex with her like you read about.

I’m assuming everyone here likes to read aboot a lot of pathetic lies.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

:gently knocks on door:

Is this where we’re drinking tonight?

Horatio Cornblower

Tonight’s tally, (chiefly due to an unexpected horseshoe tournament)(runner-up if your scoring at home)

3 Captain’s Daughters Double IPAs http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/27710/140460/

recommended by the guy who owns the package store 100 yards from my house. Not sure what this says about me.

1 Sculpin 22 oz.

http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/199/29619/

Not an overall favorite of mine but very, very good and very hard to beat in hot weather.

1 Flying Dog Snake Dog IPA

http://flyingdogbrewery.com/?beers=snake-dog-ipa

Overall consensus is that the Captain’s Daughter is a decent find and worth drinking again, Sculpin is fantastic during the summer but probably not a year round beer, Flying Dog makes interesting beers but not quite up to being put in the regular rotation, and none of them are up to the Lagunitas Lil’ Sumpin Extra that I put back in the cooler when the owner of the package store suggested the Captains’s Daughter.

Can’t blame anyone for suggesting a new beer though. Because believe you me, I am #upforwhateverdoesn’tinvolveBudLight.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Nicely done, sir. I’m just plowing through the Lagavulin tonight.

Genital Issimo

MOOOOOOOOSE – these herbs are super crunchy

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s so good I’m going to have to steal it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I am going with some steak and vegastables on the side from the farmers’ market (wonders if they use Farmersonly dot com for haystack hook-ups).

What be you cookin’ tonight?

http://38.media.tumblr.com/71fa03457809e430930697f1d5c77cb9/tumblr_nmhpb2wYj31u2602to1_500.gif

ballsofsteelandfury

Unfortunately, probably heating up leftovers. Good, though.

Horatio Cornblower

Burgers on the grill. Then to buddy’s house for chicken marinated in Asian herbs of some kind and a ridiculous venison sausage.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
scotchnaut
scotchnaut

Wahhhh? This was meant to be High School Confidential by Rough Trade. Weird.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Dare I say it? Can it be? Do you want it? Do you want it bad? Are you open to experimentation and variation of the usual? Will you get used to it and expect it all the time? It cut hurt along with the pleasure you know.

What am I speaking of? In your heart you know what it is and you know you want it.

The question is: IS THIS THE OPEN THREAD FOR SATURDAY AUGUST FIRST TWOTHOUSANDFIFTEEN???

laserguru

Hell yes.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Well thank Christ THAT made the transition to the new klubhouse….

Brocky

I owe you a big thanks friend.

Any more and I might develop a psychological dependence.

WCS

comment image

Kind of how we all feel right now.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I mean, sure, I’m alive, but what’s the point?

I guess I’ll just have to get used to the taste of homemade dick jokes…

Old School Zero

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King Hippo

Sill was planning a lovely murder/suicide pact for us all to celebrate the new NFL season in WICHITA. Perhaps they can meet the enhanced space needs of the enlarged DFO Kommunity?

ballsofsteelandfury

I think there might be a better place in Moose’s neck of the woods:

http://southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com/shared/locations/airport-hilton.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, you are going to need to order the molding kit and…..

WAIT, err…..

Jokes, yeah! HAHA!

scotchnaut

I’m not going to lie to you-I get loaded faster than a WordPress page.

Old School Zero

Everything just seems… off… today.

https://youtu.be/l56Hdjx0ckg

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Speaking of post-apocalyptic adjustments, shouldn’t someone update this to reflect the death of KSK:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kissing_Suzy_Kolber

Senor Weaselo

I like how one of the sources starts the citation with “Ape, Christmas”

trollsoharduniversity

What are these “pants” that you speak of?

WCS

All I can remember about last night is giving a guest lecture at Villanova. Or maybe it was a street corner…?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Common mistake.

/ducks soup can thrown by Nova-grad brother in law.

Duchess

Sadly I think it was Penn State.

King Hippo

if by “lecture” he meant “showered with a 10 year-old”

Old School Zero

/slowly rolls off the couch as the light of the day assaults his eyes

Where am I, why am I wearing only a tutu, and what is drawn all over my face?

ballsofsteelandfury

My guesses: the river, beer, and a penis. Not necessarily in that order.

Old School Zero

Goddamn river.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Can you just look around and see if you can see my van.

Spray painted windows, two grey primer fenders, a Darwin sticker, etc.

ballsofsteelandfury

Covalent, your bloomies are showing! Well, your two team preview posts are up. Somehow you “privately” published them, but I can see them. You may want to take them down. The post, not your bloomies. Unless you want to. It’s a free country.

ballsofsteelandfury

No worries! I’ll set them as scheduled to publish.

ballsofsteelandfury

Looks like you took them down already. Enjoy Mexico!

King Hippo

Two words:

Donkey. Show.

Horatio Cornblower

My new goal in life is to win the lottery and open a bar called…wait for it…The Yellow Bar.

You’re all invited.

ballsofsteelandfury

And that bar shall only serve craft beers and cocktails that we have discussed here. That will be GLORIOUS!

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Only problem with the Yellow Bar is that once you place your order, no changing it.

montythisseemsstrangetome

Bill Parcells has a name for a yellow bar.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Bahl?

laserguru

And you will be known as the Yellow King.

Cuntler

[BAR FLIES OPEN]

[IMMEDIATELY PACKED WITH COLDPLAY FANS AND GOLDEN SHOWER FANS]

Hora too: I’ve made a terrible mistake.

Cuntler

Hora too? I’m not even going to fix that.

Horatio Cornblower

The fuck? No bar of mine will EVER be packed with Coldplay fans.

The golden showers? Eh, I don’t judge; just take it outside freaks.

ballsofsteelandfury

Does this mean we are now required to komment naked? Cuz I’m ok with that.

American Pie Story

We weren’t before?

Doktor Zymm

Also, Romo is clearly exhibiting poor eye discipline.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I have a slightly different cause.

http://www.onderka.com/wp-content/che.png

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

OMG Grim Fandango! I bought the remastered version and fell in love again.

Duchess
makeitsnowondem

Romo’s injury is fairly minor, so I expect it’ll only cause Darren McFadden to miss a couple of games.

pickettschargeksk

Bravo! A brave, pants-less dawn for all! I shall take to the streets to spread word of this good news!
/is immediately arrested