TURDSDAY NIGHT FOOT FETISH

Well, here it is. Our favorite greatest coach ever gets his shot as the new(ish) head man of the Buffalo Bills. The Bills visit Met Life Stadium at 4-4 (2-1) against a surprisingly competent Jets team, who is 5-3 (3-1). I’m not sure I’m comfortable with living in a world where the Jets aren’t hilariously DERPy, but it appears that might be the case.

There’s been a bazillion and nine things already written about this, so I won’t really say too much. I think this game could be entertaining and fun. The Jets, behind Fitzpatrick (insert HAHHVAHHD joke here) and Chris Ivory have managed to move the ball well (and score lots of fantasy points for me in Sill’s Insanity League). Their defense is real. Todd Bowles deserves a lot of credit for having this team actually doing things right. The Bills haven’t been necessarily terrific, and when the lose, they fucking lose. That hasn’t stopped Bills fans from continuing to be the most insane fanbase in the NFL. When did this happen, by the way? Every week, Deadspin has another article on Monday, showcasing continued crezzy behavior from Bills fans. Is this something I was just never aware of? Philadelphia fans, Oakland fans, Washington fans? Yeah, we know those people are fucking nuts. But, Buffalo? Okay, sure, I guess?

Anyway, while it should be a fun and entertaining AFC East game-for-who-gets-finish-not-quite-as-far-behind-New-England, it’s still a Thursday night game, so it will be just terrible. It’s what we deserve. At least Buffalo still has pride!

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*Credit to Commentist Entrophy for that magnificent which absolutely deserves more recognition.

Additionally, in the JV footed ball, we have the Battle of the Techs, which is one the most ACC-things possible on the TWWL. The Virginia Tech Castrated Turkeys travel to Atlanta to play the Georgia Tech Yellowjackets. Normally, I love college football night games. Hell, I make time for weekly #MACtion. But, seriously, fuck this game. Fuck Virginia Tech. Fuck Frank Beamer and his weird neck growth. I can’t really say anything about Georgia Tech. They’re a big letdown from last year, I guess? Who cares. The ACC is the AFC South of college football. For some reason, people think they deserve a spot at the big-boy table.

There’s probably hawkey and NBA on somewhere, too.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“The 33” seems like a movie that Peter Gallagher’s character would have come up with in “The Player”.

Recovery Whiskey

Hahahaha

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Doktor Zymm

So….I should just keep drinking until I think this is a really exciting hockey game, right?

Smithchez

Fun Fact: No team has missed a field goal against the Jets since 1841.

Recovery Whiskey

Not everything said on the internet is true — Abraham Lincoln

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

Time traveling Nate Kaeding agrees.
comment image

blordinaryfagicmox
entropy

Ziiiiiiiiiip

Sill Bimmons

Fuck.

This.

Ad.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

THANK ALLAH!

Sill Bimmons

INSURMOUNTABLE EQUIVALENCY

Doktor Zymm

Defense is supposed to bat the ball, offense is supposed to catch the ball. Right?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Only by tradition.

entropy

He didn’t somehow drop it, he just sucks.

“He’s a hand catcher?” As opposed to what, Phil? A dog catcher? Shut the fuck up.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

From the announcing to the referees to the gameplay, this game is just terrible. Even by Thursday night standards.

Smithchez

Sammy Dropkins

Recovery Whiskey

Hit him in a bad spot

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

LET’S DO NOTHING TO SUPPORT OUR DEFENSE!

bourb0nblues
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Labyrinth?

entropy

Oh yes.

bourb0nblues

The one and only.

Sill Bimmons

NOBODY EXPECTS THE BOWIE INQUISITION

Smithchez

That’s…unfortunate.

Senor Weaselo

And derp.

Recovery Whiskey

Deflecterception

Sill Bimmons

Name five better homestyle dinners than turkey, stuffing, etc. You can’t:

http://northdallasgazette.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Thanksgiving-Turkey-Dinner.jpg

Old School Zero

I much prefer a well-made roast chicken over turkey, actually. But the rest, yeah, can’t beat that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

Such majestic, graceful creatures.

blordinaryfagicmox

comment image?w=500

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I appreciate you going down the Happy Endings gif wormhole for me. I would be there if you hadn’t done it for me based on a Casey Wilson drunk falling over pic

Smithchez

ALWAYS FUCKING INSIDE RUS ON FIRST DOWN

entropy

Do the Jets feel that running up the middle of first down is some kind of catechism?

“FIRST AND TEN, NEW YORK!”

“… Let us run…”

“UP THE MIDDLE”

“…and gain two yards…”

“AT A MAXIMUM..”

“FOR EVERYONE SEES THIS COMING, FOR EVER AND EVER, FOURTH DOWN.”

Recovery Whiskey

So mote it be

Doktor Zymm

“AND LO THIS GATORADE BECOMES THE BLOOD OF OUR SAVIOR, WEEB EWBANK”

Recovery Whiskey

This game color scheme is saying the holiday season has begun

Smithchez

That’s right. Just keep running it inside on first down, Chan. They’ll always (never?) see it coming.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I just went for a Chapelle dance gif, I didn’t have a reason

http://media0.giphy.com/media/jMzxuKoG8757O/giphy.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

This gif IS the reason.

Senor Weaselo

Do you need another reason?

Recovery Whiskey

Wilkinson’s Robot was a strong effort

entropy

I’m seriously waiting for a commentator to make a “loose tie rod” joke when the Bills offense is all over the field.

Doktor Zymm

Now that you mention it, it seems inevitable. Unless they already have and it was cut out on tape delay.

blordinaryfagicmox
Smithchez

Wilk-shake Bu-ma-ye

Gratliff
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Puntin’ Time!

Senor Weaselo

I am okay with sacks for the sack god.

Shogun Marcus

RIP “Philthy” Phil Taylor.
*Ace of Spades for the room*

Recovery Whiskey

Someone post Lemmy

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Recovery Whiskey

She might get invites to thanksgiving dinner

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Rashida Jones again because my first gif failed. I didn’t promise boobs I like this pic

http://25.media.tumblr.com/9dab47ebb6e94ead20aa41f9ea836744/tumblr_mjxkso0l8E1qeywaio2_250.gif

Recovery Whiskey

I am strangely intrigued. Drunk women

entropy

Any Rashida is a good Rashida.

Recovery Whiskey

Anyone else remember that Tostidos ad 2 years ago was featuring Niners fans

Sill Bimmons
Doktor Zymm
entropy

Mmmmm pizza….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Doktor Zymm

I like the stream I found. It’s good quality and it just says “Commercial break” instead of showing commercials.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That was how the Super Bowl was broadcast when I was in South Africa. It was nice.

entropy

I was watching one like that on Sunday, only I got a shit-brown background with a tarnished gold NFL shield on it. Most apt presentation of the shield I’d ever seen.

MR F

Anyone else forced to watch this on NFL mobile, apparently on a 7 minute delay?

Doktor Zymm

That’s not a delay, it’s just that every play has basically the same outcome.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Smithchez

I don’t think the Jets have ever run that play and actually given the ball to the motion back.

entropy

“You can DO that?”

–every Jets offensive coordinator.

blordinaryfagicmox

They can only do that if the play were named after them.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t mean this as an indictment of Darth Vader’s sense of imagination, but Obi Wan didn’t really become all that powerful.

entropy

True, but “If you strike me down, I will glow blue until the end of the trilogy” doesn’t have that same dramatic flair, y’know?

Sill Bimmons

Obi-Wan pretty much lied about everything throughout the sexlogy.

Worst. Jedi. Mentor. EVAR

So rain, short week, defensive orientated teams, so-so offense, I hope you guys think scoring more than 10 points in a game is a travesty.

blordinaryfagicmox

Did Anne Hathaway just tell me to kill myself in that commercial?

Sill Bimmons

I think that was Anna Kendrick.

blordinaryfagicmox
Sill Bimmons

Anna >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Anne

Doktor Zymm

http://malanaorganicfarm.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/3.jpg

I can’t quite figure out what’s going on in this play. I think there are too many men on the field.

blordinaryfagicmox
entropy

You’re having a lot of dichromatic fun this evening,

Doktor Zymm

Oh, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Fear my company training addled brain.