GB @ Was: The weather in Washington, UK is 41 degrees but it feels like 34. However I don’t think that it’s going to be an issue for this game. It’s been quite some time since the Slurs hosted a playoff game. This’ll give you an idea:
-Bread was only .25 but you had to slice it yourself.
-Women holding mics on the sidelines were called ‘assistants to someone that matters’ or ‘wanton hussies’.
-The NFL called concussions ‘a figment of everyone’s fevered imaginations’.
-Dan Snyder was in grade school, mixing Lysol and tap water together, labeling it as ‘lemonade’ and selling it for a buck a glass to his classmates.
-speaking of school, Tom Coughlin was walking uphill thru 4 feet of snow to a one-room schoolhouse.
-bananas hadn’t been invented in a Monsanto hothouse yet.
Those were the days, huh? Contrary to what every Packers backer thinks/the expectation of the casual NFL fan/common sense/all that is good and right in the world, Wash has an enormous advantage at the QB spot. Over the last 10 games Rodgers has a 57% completion rate and a 16TD/6INT ratio. Over that same span Cousins’ passes have found their mark 72 percent of the time and his TD/INT ratio is a “am I reading this right?” 23-3! But wait! The Slurs didn’t win a single game against a team that was over .500. Also, of Cousins 11 picks, 7 came against the blitz. There is a team playing today that blitzed the 5th-most this year. I’ll give you a second or two to figure out which one it is. Hint-for this game only the Pack D has named themselves “The Cousins Fuckers”. Now that you’ve got every single relevant bit of data related to this game, well, start with the typing!
I got nothing to do but back to Netflix. You get one more Rachel Bilson
http://33.media.tumblr.com/7ad60c25ceb19953bad5d2d01d8a6e33/tumblr_mqjao8Plcy1r426i4o1_250.gif
The Washington [*Redacted] s Go Fuck Yourself Christmas Special came late this year.
STOP WITH THE POLITICAL ADS!
He he, just getting started.
Dropping down into cruise control with this tasty bastard.
An Argentenian Malbec.
http://www.gourmetretailer.com/vendors/products/318.jpg
Maybe I should drink?
You know is really difficult to tell which comment you responded to.
On the plus side, the “you like that” chant should die out as it’s easy for the opponents to mock
The “craft of playing QB”
So do they post pics of this craft to their Pinterest?
SUCK MY DICK IT’S IN A BOX IN THE NIGHTSTAND AND IT’S MADE OF BLUE RUBBER BUT SUCK IT ANYWAY FUCK YOU
CotW
It’s blue?
In the heat of Slurs derp, Doktor Zymm wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Chicago.
What a lovely image.
An expletive tulpa!!
I THOUGHT it felt warmer up here!
I believe we have our banner quote for the week
GO PACK YOUR ASS FULL OF DYNAMITE.
I like rage-filled Dok.
No pants. All-rage.
Cate Blanchett: still fucking gorgeous.
I’m trying to imagine what would happen if an opponent beat the Raiders in a playoff game and their fans started chanting like these Packers fans are. I honestly believe, without hyperbole, that each and every one of them would get assaulted.
If the tuck rule bullshit happened in Oakland the riot would still be going on.
If that happened at O.co, no one would get arrested.
Good. That is what true fandom is all about.
Just as the NFL still needs Jones/Suh/Burfect to show that the league is still “tough” and “hard hitting”, they still need fans like Raider Nation (#onenation) to sell that fan in the stands really do care about their teams and aren’t just there because they got corporate tickets that week.
In 2012 I went to Green Bay and watched the Giants beat up on the Packers. I was basically as obnoxious as I could be. It was right around the time of the discount double check. I think I shouted Hey Rodgers like 5,000 times. I’m usually a mute in the stands but the damn Packer fans were so polite and understanding that I kept pushing it to see if they could FEEL. I feel like it would be the precise opposite in Oakland.
If I were on the jury, I would totally acquit, too.
Way too low. I reject that completely.
Should have been 90 minutes.
Seriously, you gotta clean the pipes daily if you can.
Yes, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too low.
Almost more lying to themselves than the …………………pole
http://33.media.tumblr.com/52759bf07da3339383930b1613fdba96/tumblr_nw126cP5Jm1rkskbao1_500.gif
All about getting warmed up.
Still more fingers than JPP
I’ve jerked it during this game to an Alison Brie, a Rachel Bilson, and two Yvonne Strahovskis.
I just saw Alex Ovechkin’s dad on my TV screen and holy shit, the Skins should sign him to play nose tackle. He makes his son look small.
http://49.media.tumblr.com/caa24d9a045c8b5ec160f53c0cea60f0/tumblr_nxyu6rWl6Z1qbia6oo4_500.gif
I know I’m a realist and I adjust my expectations realistically, and so I was expecting a [*Redacted] s loss and really didn’t want them in the playoffs to begin with, but…SHIT THIS SUCKS. FUCK THE PACK. FUCK YOU PACK. FUCK YOU PACK. I CHANGED YOUR CHANT, ASSHOLES.
At least you can focus on the Wizards now.
The Wizards are the NBA Texans.
FASTER THAN A SPEEDING WIZARD? FASTER THAN A SPEEDING HIGH RANKED GUY IN THE KKK? YEAH WAY LESS OFFENSIVE.
http://i.imgur.com/C2vQHa6.gif
Nice change of pace.
Why on earth is Rodgers still in? Have we learned nothing since both times Kurt Warner got hurt when the game was no longer in question?
Coach is a discount double dumbass.
http://57.media.tumblr.com/9a7af4950ce7524bb32e4a4605a5801c/tumblr_nxyu6rWl6Z1qbia6oo3_500.gif
Testing something really quickly
[poll id="4"]
WELP that doesn’t work.
WP be like “nah”
No, it worked.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/f1252a900808f93549c4f27b19d107d7/tumblr_nyrz93WsGz1u9127so1_500.jpg
A pair of pants was all that stood between a group of Packers fans and a grisly death. If only they knew how close they came.
Oh the number of times I’ve yelled that from my lawn…
BAD GHOST!
http://57.media.tumblr.com/0c035dc8aa660aa50db18d7e88de7887/tumblr_nxytpkDeKd1rp0vkjo1_500.gif
Still time to score 50.
Wild Card Weekend for Least
I posted this one but I fucking love it so it is showing up again
http://img.pandawhale.com/112694-rachel-bilson-hot-dancing-gif-Xer8.gif
She is a very attractive woman
And little. Google says she’s 5’2.
I love short women. No clue why
Because they’re fun.
Are the crowd still chanting “We like that” after that sack? Or are the Packers fans doing it to mock them?
Yes.
I think if you chant “USA” at a Washington game you should get deported, and I am running for President on this platform.
I’d vote for you.
But they’re not yelling that.
I’d vote the fuck out of this if I had citizenship.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/67834d80683efdcc0414c560829e6b17/tumblr_n5542z2eKI1s9ocx8o3_r2_250.gif
Yum
And a nice sack waaaaaay outside the pocket to top off this humiliation for Skins fans.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/4c8c3e83c67995941706697a72fc3c19/tumblr_nxx2vb3zba1r6mdwlo1_500.png
http://cdn.rsvlts.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Alison-Brie-GIF-034.gif
Clearing the open tabs as the game runs down
http://i.perezhilton.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/alison-brie-sexy-santa-holiday.gif
Aaron Rodgers will think twice next time about asking for a challenge with nothing to lose.
No. I’m not leaving my place, cause I would have to put on pants. Note to self, figure out this “killing people with my mind” thing. Would be really useful here.
I’ve been trying for 40 years. If you figure it out, let me know.
The only doctor I know who can pull that off is also a partner in TB12.
Or with a sniper rifle like that adorable kitty that accompanies all of your posts.
You need to go to South Harmon Institute of Technology
There’s no rule against killing whilst wearing a sensible skirt with comfortable shoes.
As long as Holtby, Ovechkin and the other core group of Caps players can stay healthy in the playoffs, they’re going to the finals this year.
They’re going to shed the Sharks of the east rep this season
Nah.
I don’t want to live in that world.
FUCK THAT.
Love em, but believe it when I see it.
You mean Ice Redacteds, and Ice Niners?
http://www.crossingbroad.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/ovi.gif
I LOVE this gif.
/Ice Giants fan. AKA Caps playoff kryptonite.
They’re going to suffer a humiliating 5-game elimination to the Ghost Bear-led Flyers. I must see Caps fans cry.
Cromulent challenge.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/d5626d915b50c5306d82acbbb7957371/tumblr_nxyzpx8E2J1ue9j4wo1_400.gif
I would be quietly disappointed, but I might just have to go hunt down and kill these “GO PACK GO” assholes. FUCK YOU PRISON HARD.
http://56.media.tumblr.com/a739458424e00c7949d433a280fb8772/tumblr_nxzllw3kQU1qa0wj4o4_540.png
GET EM DOK
NOW YOU UNDERSTAND WHY WE HATE THEM
Pretty ballsy to yell that in Chicago.
Another:
http://cdn.makeagif.com/media/11-03-2014/yJ186H.gif
It is almost time for a wonderful scotch fueled nap, then cook me up some sausage and vodka sauce.
You do that! Thanks for the hospitality earlier, and for letting me out of the Play Dungeon!
Look it this guy, all not dead n shit!!
https://twitter.com/GMoneyELITE/status/686349980077002753
Still time for some Packer derp…
Can’t wait for All-Pro Eagles QB, Robert Griffin III.
Coached by Tom Coughlin.
Dont you drag me into Zymm’s depression
Just like everything else in my life the [*Redacted] s make me bitter and,depressed.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/ba208b82198f31bdf9787f138a06b075/tumblr_nxyu6rWl6Z1qbia6oo1_500.gif
Dallas. Do they go for RG3 or JFF?
Both
RGIII
You die. You die and go straight to hell.
http://57.media.tumblr.com/f089f2c7525eb55cccfa9b140621d618/tumblr_nxyu6rWl6Z1qbia6oo2_500.gif
The Texans will win the bidding for JFF. It is their destiny.
Um hi. I just landed in Denver and couldn’t get the wifi to work all flight. Is Dok ok?
pantsless. corner. crying. threatening to kill local pack fans.
So, what? Average?
Seems to be contemplating mass murder. Otherwise fine
If RG3 ever went to Dallas…
Live from Dok’s apartment.
Welp. May as well let his backup get some play time in, so he can experience playoff game environments.
there are assholes going “woo” and chanting “go pack go” outside of my window. Do any of you lovely people know where I can buy some automatic weapons?
‘Merica?
Gunshows before they close that loophole.
Gun shows.
Follow the chant of “Go Pack Go”. Like 50/50 they are at a gun show
Sorry it is small
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/4319758/yvonne-strahovski-o.gif
Thats what she said.
Immediately realized I phrased that wrong
I guess the takeaway here is that the 4 lower-tier division winners are dogshit. Who knew?
(Everyone. Everyone knew)
Joe Buck says the Skins have a lot to be excited about. I think that’s the meanest fucking thing he’s said all day.
I think he is too dumb to be mean