Well, somehow we made it. I’m so glad that we didn’t have to turn the car around due to bad behavior. Does everyone know which teams are playing? That’s what I thought. Between that and Hippo’s excellent breakdown of the game I’ve nothing to say about that end of things but I would like to share with you some “behind the scenes” tidbits about this very site that I think you might be interested in. I’m not going to name names…just yet.
Way back in 2007 the founder of this site, a grizzled, PTSD-wracked veteran of 3 tours of the second invasion of Iraq (anyone that has a beef with this version of events can take it up with me in the boardroom tomorrow morning) decided that there should be a new-ish football site. With a ton of moxy and just one good arm he created “Abandon Hope All Ye Football Fans That Enter”. That site was a disaster. I mean, it was right there in the title. Who the hell would want to join? Years later, after his extended recuperation at the St. Tunison Sanitarium For The Hopeless he decided to give it one more go.
It was a super-tough haul, putting this site together with nothing more than used scotch tape and pigeon feathers but he got the damn thing to work. But would Door Flies Open fly? A number of lawyers flocked to the site but it was immediately apparent that as a result, the site lacked “any sense of a moral compass”, according to internet pundits. At that point the site was opened up to almost everyone. Normal people came to the site in the dozens-including yours truly.
What followed was a ton of hard work. Night after night, huddled together in a dumpster underneath a single street lamp, we batted around the questions. “How can we take this site to the next level?” and “Is no one going to throw some pizza crusts in here?-I’m hungry!” and “Could you please not urinate on my pizza crust?”. We learned a lot about each other. Who knew that someone could be triggered by two exclamation marks but not one or three? And the hygiene, OH, THE PERSONAL HYGIENE!
So here we are now. We’ve morphed into a mid-major behemoth of a football-specific website that is bound to knock off a #2 or #3 ranked site as soon as we’re allowed back into the tourney. “Ongoing Pattern of Irregular Prescriptions”, my ass. The Internet is clearly out to get “The Little Site That Could”. We’ll survive and thrive…and maybe, just maybe, I can finally get that $12 Toys R Us coupon I was promised at the outset…
If this commercial had a bunch of fat sheep singing “Fat Bottom Girls” you might have had me Honda, but you couldn’t quite pull that trigger could you?
I thought that was a commercial for Wool.
Sheep singing Queen. Sure. Why the fuck not?
Well……you know. Sexual abominations.
Big day for Queen
They need a wider camera angle. I didn’t see any goddamn blocks at all.
Peyton can’t throw 10 yards downfield.
You’ll all note that I called out Schofield in my SB50 prediction post…..
Not if I keep drinking like Prohibition’s coming back at midnight I won’t.
Can’t believe the Broncos are even in the Super Bowl with Schofield, the NFL’s worst starter.
Can we somehow pair him up against Ginn?
He tried to hold on that sack, but couldn’t even do that right.
I haven’t seen a pile move like that since the last time I had lunch at Chipotle.
http://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/shaking_head_breaking_bad.gif
Next up on Who Ya Got: A field of weiner dogs dressed as weiners or a field of business/studious corgis?
Always bet on black. Labs
I still think it’s gonna take 2 MOAR FGs. This’un not in the barn yet.
You mean it’s not an insurmountable 3 FG lead?
My laptop battery is dying and I’m too lazy to get off the couch and plug in the charger.
I kind of want the next snap to sail ten feet over Pey-Pey’s noggin.
Jesus, does the center even have the strength to get that kind of height?
Producer must be a Steeler fan.
someone bitching about putting ketchup on hot dogs in
3
2
1
vvv
Too late
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again…
YOU DON’T PUT KETCHUP ON HOT DOGS!!!!!!!
^^^
Unless you’re under age 8, in which case I’ll just figure you’re from Flint and drank lead-laced water.
Let’s go pick 6.
Let’s go back to not believing in the Panthers. Maybe then they’ll start playing better to prove us wrong.
I think “you know, maybe the Panthers aren’t so bad” then I hear the Cortland Finnagen was in on a play.
WHY IS MUSTARD A KETCHUP MUSTARD IS NOT A KETCHUP WHAT THE FUCK
True.
I am putting in as much effort paying attention as these teams are trying to win.
This league needs an enema!
/partyhorn
The Panthers are straight up fucking themselves over.
Wasn’t it super obvious the Denver defensive end lined up offside? I mean, it was blatant.
Aqib Talib for all the penalties.
TJ Ward should not have gotten into Von’s post-game Molly at the half.
The Hall of Fame Game gets earlier every year.
“He threw it so hard that Ted Ginn could not make the catch.”
Phil Simms, refusing the blame the QB for anything, ever.
Bet Ginn was the fastest guy off the field there.
http://i29.tinypic.com/ir6ek9.jpg
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Derp level plaid
YOU GET A DERP AND YOU GET A DERP AND YOU GET A DERP
If Cam spent more time studying and less time dancing, he wouldn’t have thrown that pick.
Camcepfumberdonksrecover
mother pus bucket
WELLLLLLLLP
So….that just happened. In the Super Bowl.
Yakety Sax!
Late McManus 55-yarder for a 22-20 win?
If Jerry Richardson’s O face was ever to be seen in public the universe would collapse back in on itself.
Jerry Richardson looks like a very old baby.
Who is made of rubber
There’s still a large glass of win left in this bottle, but tempted to switch to Gin
Win and gin?
Stick with the win.
The kids all talk about how good it is.
Any bourble around?
No, bourble is something you get into.
Is that 2003 vintage win?
Panthers have had their fill of Gin(n).
They likely are out of win.
Slow developing shit like that ain’t gonna work against this D.
Ted Ginn does not deserve a SB ring. Ever.
If the Panthers win, Cam should get his too, for the amazing feat of making him look decent.
That was the most Ted Ginn play ever.
Hell of a catch
PHILLY BROWN Y’ALL
Measty
Holy shit, that catch was insane.
Does anybody remember the cat herding commercial from ages ago? Now THAT was funny.
When you brung in a herd of short hairs … Aint a feeling like it in the world
Last commercial I recall truly enjoying
Butterfinger commercials have gone downill since the Bart and Homer days.
I’m afraid that no obvious MVP candidate for the Broncos means Peyton is in play. Imagine an MVP QB with a negative TD/INT ratio.
LEADERSHIP GRIT INTANGIBLES OMAHAS FETUS PARTS
JEEBUS, how ya let him fucking catch that shit? Who do you think you are, the Lions prevent unit??
Miller or Ware.
Every time Peyton looks at his old SB MVP trophy, he should send a check to Dominic Rhodes.
X-Men: Apocalypse might be incredible, but sweet Lord that commercial was stale piss.
Psylocke without a booty is criminal
This Bai shit is like battery acid in your stomach.
Even at half-strength it’s fucking killing me.