Westminster Dog Show Open Thread – Day 1

Yes, it’s not Presidents’ Day.  A great holiday when a lazy ass Balls can wake up at the crack of 10 AM, throw some shorts on (never pants!), and get to the mall to catch the 10 AM showing of Deadpool expertly calculating the amount of time the stupid previews take in order to show up exactly just a minute before the actual movie starts!

No, that’s not the day today is/was.  Today is the first day of the 140th Westminster Dog Show!

WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today and tomorrow are the only days of the calendar year when the word “bitch” is NOT primarily used as a derogatory term for women (and sometimes men).  Let us rejoice in that and enjoy the multiple double entendre and dick joke opportunities this day provides.  Acting as Head Judge and presiding over the festivities this year is a Canadian evil mastermind named Meen.

 

The morning sessions are not televised and are held at Piers 92/94 in Manhattan.  The evening sessions are held at Madison Square Garden and are on both CNBC (tonight) and USA Network (tomorrow).  The Canada has coverage of both nights on Animal Planet.  Here is the schedule:

MONDAY & TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 15-16, 2016 6PM-11PM

Doors open at 6 PM for best of breed benching area

  • Monday to include Hound, Toy, Non-Sporting and Herding groups (beginning at 8 PM)
  • Tuesday to include Junior Showmanship, Sporting, Working, Terrier groups and BEST IN SHOW (beginning at 7:30 PM)

Power up the jokes, dogs!  (I’m sorry)

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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WCS

At long last.

Shogun Marcus

Deadpool was excellent. Big dumb lovable dog of a movie. Me and the missus would happily go again.

King Hippo

just time to say HAI then BYE, since I am waiting to Call Saul until my morning coffee time.

I will note that Odenkirk’s range, depicting with only his eyes and body language the depth of his heartbreak when Kim turns down the offer of working together with a joke. That was some genius shit. And when I knew this show was gonna take us to deep, meaningful places.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

People are actually talking about dogs here finally. I was alone earlier. You guys suck. I have 1 min to smoke a cig before new Saul

theeWeeBabySeamus

Dammit kid….leave me kibble alone.
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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I found a tumblr with USWNT pics. I assume she is the planned replacement for Solo. Never saw her play a game but I am ok with this until I see a game she plays and sucks and then I want the asshole back in net. Ashlyn Harris.

http://49.media.tumblr.com/846580ec56a714d6e8d49c37f19cee53/tumblr_o2gt3pacnK1qhpwd2o1_500.gif

King Hippo

It looks like she is holding an invisible cigarette.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

That somehow makes it hotter for me

Romonobyl

If any of you are watching the Grammys…is there sufficient “diversity”?

Senor Weaselo

They had Lionel Richie, Kendrick, and Hamilton, so they’ve already topped the Oscars.

Romonobyl

Awfully slobbery sometimes though.

Doktor Zymm

That’s fine, as long as they’re primarily outdoor dogs. I kinda got used to animal slobber with horses. There’s a fungus that grows on red clover which makes horses drool like crazy. We used to have to put extra bedding in the front of the stall to soak up the horse spit.
http://www.omafra.gov.on.ca/english/livestock/horses/facts/info_slobbersf1.jpg

Romonobyl

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JustStopDude

We need bring this sport back…

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JustStopDude

Got to own gravity SON!

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theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s some crazy shit.

WCS

Meanwhile, in Russia…

Romonobyl

One of those rare instances where “son of a bitch” is entirely appropriate.

JustStopDude

Fucking suppose to go to Detroit today. Started snowing here last night. Woke up this morning to about four inches. This area of Virginia believes snow plows go against Baby Jesus or some shit.

Make my way to work after checking to be sure my flight is still going to take off. Drop off my keys for my coworker so he can check on my pet. Struggle to get to the airport (I drive a sports car which cannot handle snow at all).

Get through check in and TSA. Then they update the status of flights showing they are all canceled.

Get back to the office to pick up apartment keys. Car gets stuck in lot. Get ride back to my place from crazy guy I work with who I think sells meth on the side.

So now I got to get up early, hope the taxis are working in the AM, get to work, get my car to airport (or call another taxis as I got about an hour’s worth of work to do), and then fly to Detroit. I fucking hate Detroit.

theeWeeBabySeamus

So….free night?
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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Col. Duke LaCross

On tape-delay here, but Jesus Christ, somebody tell this Weekend guy that Micki Free from Shalomar wants his haircut back.

Senor Weaselo

Note to self, actually see if I can get Hamilton tickets at some point.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

USWNT is playing. Kelley O’Hara got a goal last time I was out for a cig. So pic (like 10 min late, got distracted looking at pics and alt+tabbing between that and the show I am watching)

http://45.media.tumblr.com/7df59b63246085cf567bb1fe7d52b872/tumblr_nroa8sZLgE1uaifc3o7_250.gif

Yeah, it isn’t overtly sexual, she is a talented woman and I find that attractive

Romonobyl

Mrs. Nobyl loves these dog shows, but only for the herding group (we have a German Shepherd, 90 pounds of wannabe lap dog). The Best in Show is usually judged by a high maintenance elderly lady with a Southern old-money ancestry, which explains why the toy group so often wins. That woman will only pick a dog that will fit in her purse.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ladyfriend turned on the Grammys. I have to think Glenn Frey can’t look much worse than his surviving bandmates.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

RWing the last ep of Better Call Saul on AMC. I forgot how bad his breakdown was.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ditto on the RW and the forgotting the breakdown severity.
Chuck is a dick.

theeWeeBabySeamus

After the latest crushing NCSU defeat, I had planned to watch my last Deadwood ep.
Instead, am doing the 3 hour Saul event (last yr’s finale, this year’s premiere, Talking Saul).
/I just can’t stand the thought of Deadwood being over 🙁

Shogun Marcus

Truly one of the great shows. I understand your pain.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Go away cat… well maybe we can be friends

http://www.importrottweilers.com/images/studs/iwan/iwan2.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/lzwlFy2PJZ0/hqdefault.jpg

Not quite the point of the joke, but hey.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I thought it was a good response

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Defensive Back Mike Wallace

HOW DA FUCK AM I JUST NOW LEARNING ABOUT THIS SITE?!?!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Not to spoil the ending, but this paralyzed dog walks again at the end. He was obviously faking to become a youtube star

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DO9PKG05OJY

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Every time I see NFL Network talk about Barry Sanders, I’m astounded that he was burnt out by Detroit’s sheer incompetence. That’s like making Ray Charles tired of playing music.

Senor Weaselo

Shit. Now I want to see Barry Sanders sing “What’d I Say.”

WCS

Megatron too! The Lions have this “Being Shitty” thing down.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

In hindsight, it’s amazing that Detriot went 0-16 once.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Only once

Col. Duke LaCross

The really nutty thing is as shitty as they were when he played there, the Lions still got to the playoffs five times in that span.

WCS

The NC State alumni here may not want to turn to the blood bath currently happening in Charlottesville.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Have had it on since the tip. We had a great first five, a good first 20.
And then reality set in.
Not like it’s anything new and/or unexpected.
Treading water for an NIT bid…which currently is beyond likely.
Yeah baby!!!!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Besides…you trying to say that a 39-15 2nd half (so far) is somehow something to be ashamed of?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
theeWeeBabySeamus

So close….but now he needs Pey Pey’s neck doctor….
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/042014/1396630635_dogs_fails_at_jumping_on_couch.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
WCS

I still can’t tell if this is genuine anger/disappointment, a standard “against the consensus” clickbate piece, both, or a troll job:

http://io9.gizmodo.com/here-s-what-was-wrong-with-the-walking-dead-s-mid-seaso-1759186419#_ga=1.157455795.889794861.1439852476

theeWeeBabySeamus

I vote both.
Probably wrote some fan fic that he thought was better.
/spoiler alert

Anytime shit gets blowed up, lakes get set afire, and entire families get consumed by the living dead….I mean how can one not enjoy that shit?
Too bad about Jessie tho….Rick can’t catch a break.

The Maestro

No doges on my teevee here and sure as shit don’t feel like watching the Grammys.

What am I gonna do with my life now??

WCS

Better Call Saul, muthafucka.

Senor Weaselo

I’m watching the Grammys for Hamilton.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

See, this is much better. I want to steal her to be a friends w/ my puppy

theeWeeBabySeamus

Happy dog.

laserguru

Since today was my payback day off for working the day after Thanksgiving I decided since it’s a 3-day weekend and it’s over fucking 80 degrees that I needed to grill some New York strip steaks, bake a couple of potatoes and steal a few days of summer.

Happy Memorial/President’s Day everyone!

Let’s drink!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Senor Weaselo

Deadpool was worth the many months of excitement. I’m planning on going again.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

In reference to the actual dog show. I will go for watching videos of mutts and purebreads that weren’t inbred to the point of being just unhealthy online. This is like porn before the internet, yeah I could still watch whatever Red Shoe Diaries clone Cinemax has on now or spend 3 seconds online looking for something better.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Shelter dogz R da bestest.

Sill Bimmons

Too much other stuff going on my teevee tonight.

Specifically rewatching the last couple episodes of Better Call Saul so my senile brain can keep up with the new episodes.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’ve got the last three from last year recording as well.
I had similar senile brain concerns.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was reminded last night during TWD, still forgot it was back tonight. I might do a RW of the last ep as a catch up before it airs

theeWeeBabySeamus

They’re doing a “Talking Saul” as well…Hardwick doing his Talking Dead schtick for Saul, I presume. Didn’t realize Saul got ratings good enough to warrant that, but I’ll give it a look.
Great mid season TWD premiere last night, btw. So much death and dismemberment.

/I may need therapy

Spanky Datass

Yes, I’ve watched five episodes of ‘Saul’ since Saturday in prep for tonight’s offering.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am going to see Deadpool tomorrow, obviously still in shorts and probably my Bears slippers, not even gonna bother with sandals even though it is like 0 out and probably will snow again tonight. But 10 am sounds early to be drunk and there is no way I am watching this sober

/ Tuesday early showings or late night showings are when I go see all my movies, less people and $5 Tuesdays at our local theaters
// Will actually just be mildly buzzed, drunk driving isn’t worth it. Maybe I could get a DD

WCS

I recall how much this thing pissed me off when I was younger because it preempted Raw.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Kungjitsu

I want a gangsta category where you spark out your dog. There will be a Pitbull division and a Rottweiler division.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

That dog is a great actor.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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