Your “I Waited All Season For This?” Super Bowl and Related Entertainment Shenanigans Open Thread

As Barry Manilow would caterwaul, “Looks like we made it” to our second Super Bowl as a bunch of kid-like creatures that exist under the DFO banner. Well done everyone! [waits for ecstatic applause to die down] It just goes to show you what can be done with a wee bit of moxie, three cadavers, an empty garage, a government research grant, one teaspoon of wasabi, a pair of cargo shorts from Eddie Bauer, the letter “R”, (“G” can suck it-look at us now buddy, maybe you’ll actually answer your emails in the future) a few bottles of Zantac (150-the extra strength kind), the love of a bi-polar woman, superior gas mileage and some second-hand pot smoke. We’re unbelievably lucky because if you were to combine all these things together at any other point in time you’d not only not get this particular result, you’d more than likely get arrested. I thank God every day that there was no God to interfere with the extraordinarily delicate process that brought this whole thing to fruition. TO THE GAME!

In your daily wanderings across the internubs you may have gleaned that the Falcons of Atlanta are dueling the Patriots of the New England. Based on my long history of watching football I know that each and every member of both teams are going to try their very best to win the game because there is a financial bonus attached to doing so. For some it might be 10k, for others it may be 5 mil-whatever the amount, all participants (including coaches) regard this as “free money” and will do their utmost to have that money dumped into their bank account. Some will secretly record practices, others will intentionally deflate footballs. It’s more than likely that a certain unnamed squad is violating the spirit of a specific rule as I type. I’ve always felt that you are the sum of your actions and not what your guttural one- and two- and three-word responses in press conferences imply.

Okay. Now you know who I’m cheering for. Big whoop. Now it’s time for you folks to chime in. Tell us goobers what you’re up to. What are you cooking? Where are you watching the game? Hey lurker, say hello and let us know that you like what we’re doing and how we might make things better. We’re all ears-except for me, I’m all coccyx. Yeah, that’s right-I’ve got a big coccyx. If you lurk and have a medical degree…please, this condition is not pleasant AT ALL.

Enjoy the game people.

 

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Well 2017, you’re off to a good start.
My nuts are here for 11 months more good kicking.
‘Night folks.

laserguru

Fuck you Buck.

Romonobyl

Let the slobbering begin.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
The Maestro

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Gratliff

Guh

ThursdaySkyGoddess
...

*sighs*

ThePirateSloth

I hate everything

Doktor Zymm

Fuck night, y’all.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Bring back General Sherman

theeWeeBabySeamus

Bloody hell.

herodotus450
The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

I’m out. Later taters

the Alpha and the Amoeba

I honestly don’t care who wins, I’m just glad it’s been entertaining.

makeitsnowondem

This sucks ass.

Spur

Falcons couldn’t get one FG in the 2nd half.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Swallowing the whistle on cut blocks i see

Duchess

and holding… and face masks

Recovery Whiskey

Gentlemen. It’s been a privilege commenting with you

laserguru

You as well

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hate to say it….but good call.

the Alpha and the Amoeba

Didn’t turn his head; wasn’t making a play for the ball

entropy

Uncalled chop block there….

laserguru

You throw a flag now?

...

I’ll never say anything good about Atlanta again.

Wakezilla

So many holds

Romonobyl
Old School Zero

Fuck you, bleergh.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

LET THEM PLAY

ThursdaySkyGoddess
herodotus450

Wait, pussy overtime rules now apply to the playoffs?

Gratliff

Think I’m gonna become one of those sportsball guys from this point on

Beastmode Ate My Baby

The one with the pucks and the baskets?

Claymaker

This is fucking happening.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

SOMEONE BRING ME DONOVAN MCNABB AS A SACRIFICE

laserguru

Here comes the pick.
C’mon c’mon.

Spur

Can Brady retire after this please?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Can someone cut the Patriots out of the Falcons’ defensive radio freq please?

Doktor Zymm

Dear Atlanta. The TOILET is for shitting, NOT THE BED.

Gratliff

Welp, time to throw up all that queso I shouldn’t have eaten

laserguru

Perfect balls.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Thank you.

...

Thank God I don’t have kids else I’d have to explain to them evil actually wins most of the time.

the Alpha and the Amoeba

All through the post-season, it was nothing by complaining that the games weren’t close enough, but it seems that was what you really wanted all along was blowouts.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Now I remember why I hate Atlanta.

Recovery Whiskey

Patriots got away with a hold

entropy

Is water still wet, too?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Hey look, someone knos how to take knee in the endzone…

Doktor Zymm

I should just go back to playing No Man’s Sky. I need to make some copper wire, which isn’t made out of copper for some reason.

ThePirateSloth

Play Factorio for that instead

Old School Zero

Isn’t that the worst? And Rigogen is so inconsistent to find in quantity.

Doktor Zymm

My home planet is actually pretty good for Rigogen, but it’s radioactive as all hell, so kinda risky making resource runs.

Old School Zero

Yeah, I made sure to put my home base on a decent Rigogen planet. Very hostile sentinels, which are a pain to deal with when I’m underwater, but it works. My room full of pearls is complete.

Romonobyl

I’m gonna go play Russian Roulette with a single barrel shotgun…BRB.

ThePirateSloth

This is just a dramatic recreation using amateur actors of election night, isn’t it? You totally got us Lifetime.

Fronkenshteen

This is gonna suck…

Spur

Olivia Munn hasnt seen an erect dick in a very long time