Your “Stylin’ & Profilin'” Monday Night Football & Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • The pressure must have gotten to John Fox – it’s Truth Biscuit time in Chicago!
    • His first game will be next Monday night versus the Vikings.
  • With the Falcons bye week approaching, it appears Julio Jones – owner & wearer of the high flyin’ cleats in the banner photo – will not miss any time due to injury.
    • He hurt a hip flexor in the loss to Buffalo.
  • Based on stats through the first four games, Tom Brady is on track to be sacked 52 times this year.
    • To date, he’s been dropped 13 times. He was sacked for loss 15 times in all of the 2016 regular season.
  • The Seahawks got beat-the-hell-up last night in their victory over the Colts:
    • Left tackle Rees Odhiambo: Bruised heart.
      • HOW THE FUCK DID HE FINISH THE GAME?!
    • RB Chris Carson: Broken leg, below the knee
      • Done for the season
    • DE Cliff Avril: Pinched nerve; day-to-day
      • He lost feeling in his fingertips after an accidental kick to the head.
    • CB Jeremy Lane: Strained groin.
      • Day-to-day
  • As expected, Eagles fans took over the StubHub Center and turned an away game into home-field advantage. This Deadspin link has full audio of the debacle Eagles OT Jason Peters said “was like a home game”.

Finally, unrelated to football, it’s been a bad day for music fans. The 58 people killed at the Jason Aldean show in Las Vegas by a domestic terrorist, and news that Tom Petty is on life-support dead, have made for a very sad Monday.

I saw Tom Petty live once. It was the “True Confessions” tour with Bob Dylan in 1986.

    

It was pretty good. Each played 45 minutes on their own, and then combined for the final 30 minutes of the show. I owned that shirt for years; it eventually wore out.


Game Preview: Chiefs at [*Redacted] s

Tonight, two of the sports world’s finest ethnic slurs face off in Washington as the Kansas City Chiefs, owned by non-affiliated Christian & white male Clark Hunt, take on a Washington team owned by Jewish businessman & white male Dan Snyder.

Hunt, who lettered in soccer at Southern Methodist University in 1987, and therefore did not have any hand in the alleged murder of five hookers while Craig James definitely attended SMU between 1979-82, majored in business, worked at Goldman Sachs and was named head of Hunt Sports Group LLC when his father Lamar died. He shares ownership with his three siblings. He was influential in getting his father to back the creation of Major League Soccer, something that validated the league in its early days of operation.

Dan Snyder, a petty little man who has a tendency to sue any organization that writes untruthful things, is a businessman notorious for attempting to squeeze every penny out of the organizations he owns or belongs to as well as monetizing the fan base. I refer you to Dave McKenna’s piece from the Washington City Paper for more details. Snyder attempted to sue the paper & author for defamation, but the suit was withdrawn in the face of a SLAPP motion by the defendants. Currently surrounded by yes-men, he presides over a team that hasn’t done anything meaningful in the NFL since Joe Gibbs first discovered car racing.

The game itself should be a spirited affair, as Kansas City are the only remaining unbeaten team and Washington wants to keep pace with the Eagles & stay one game ahead of the Cowboys. Alex Smith is doing a commendable job holding back the tide wanting high draft pick Patrick Mahomes to come in & take the reins. Now that they have settled on a pronunciation, Washington is enjoying another Kirk Cousins franchise-tag year, as their recent devastation of the Raiders proved. They both have solid receiving corps, and while Washington has the advantage in the safety/corner department, they won’t be able to do much without being able to stop KC’s Kareem Hunt, who is the prime reason Alex Smith looks as good as he does.

It’s either going to be a 42-38 barnburner or a 7-6 slog. Gun to my head, I’d take the Chiefs.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NFL:
    • Washington at Kansas City – 8:15PM | ESPN / TSN
      • en español en ESPN2
  • WWE
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360

Baseball playoffs start tomorrow with the AL play-in game, followed by the NL game & NHL home openers Wednesday. WE’RE GOOD UNTIL FEBRUARY!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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theeWeeBabySeamus

Nawt a fumbre

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Well, *I* don’t want it to be a fumble, so I’m certain that it *will* be.

scotchnaut

“He ain’t heavy, he’s my Cousins.”

-Washington OC

King Hippo

A’ight then, we live in a world where the Redacteds and RRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!! are just good, damn it.

JustStopDude

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Redshirt

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Chaos reigns, cats lie down with dogs, etc etc etc.

Doktor Zymm

I know I have travel as an excuse, but damn I seriously fucked up my fantasy lineup this week

King Hippo

yet, still gonna beat me because I keep starting Catler

Doktor Zymm

Good chance KHunt bails ya out tho

theeWeeBabySeamus

Playing from behind they better go to Kelce.
This is my totally unbiased opinion.

litre_cola

I have 500 pts against me. Not to mention I am just awful

JustStopDude

Cooper Cousins…jesus christ you saddled that kid with that name?!?!

Fucking CTE is nothing to fuck with!

King Hippo

playground, meet beatings

theeWeeBabySeamus

Meat Beatings?

– A. Rodgers

King Hippo

“Playgrounds, you said?” – Marc T.

Doktor Zymm

His initials can also stand for cubic centimeters!

JustStopDude

Its always funny when I have customers come in from overseas…

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and the first thing they want to do is go to a shooting range…

Senor Weaselo

“Permission to say ‘Oh cock?'”

WCS

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Redshirt

I’m surprised the windows weren’t bulletproof. I thought that high, the windows are supposed to be strong so no one could fall though by accident.

(complexly serious)

Doktor Zymm

He had some sort of fancy hammer, knocked the window out beforehand

Redshirt

Oh, great! Now we’ll need Hammer Control!

Doktor Zymm

No one realized that MC Hammer was a political act

Unsurprised

“And ice axes, for good measure.”
— L. Trotsky

litre_cola

“Fancy hammer” That just made Buddy excited.

Anthony In TX

“The hammer is my penis.”

Viva La Tabula Raza

Yeah, big gambling losers falling from the sky would probably not be something the casinos would like.

Redshirt

The Chiefs better improve their pass protection. Their RT and TE put a serious pass rush on their QB.

Unsurprised

29 columns across, 20 rows down.
Red – dead (58), yellow – wounded (515).
This is the price of “freedom.”

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JustStopDude

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Anthony In TX

“Too soon!” – a bunch of idiots that think we should wait some unspecified amount of time before trying to do something about gun violence in this country

Unsurprised

“Never.”

Never is the time when they think it’s acceptable. It’s a fucking dodge, and those people can all go fuck themselves to death.

Redshirt

Agreed. I’m sure with this President and Congress we can get some…

Maybe table this conversation for ’21. Or maybe ’19 depending on how the Dems do in the midterms.

Gratliff

GOP 2021: We’ll really repeal Obamacare this time. You’ll see.

Redshirt

GOP 2104: Repeal ObamaSandersClintonCare

Unsurprised

They don’t care when 26 white children are murdered before Christmas.

They don’t care when two of their own are nearly murdered in two separate mass shootings.

They will never care.

Dick E. Phuck

“Well, waddya want us to do about it, huh? Fuck off.”
– The Government

Redshirt

♫ Are you ready for some football? ♫

MNF Director with a plea to the KC Chiefs.

JustStopDude

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Brick Meathook

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WCS

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ballsofsteelandfury

Why is he smoking a turd?

Viva La Tabula Raza

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scotchnaut

Incoming Old Man Hot Take:

If that durn dreadlocked kid gets pulled down by his hair, it’s his own damn fault.

King Hippo

yeah, I have never understood how one could play FOOTBAW with dreads, especially an offensive skill position

King Hippo

/also *OLD MAN TAEK* I would imagine footbaw to be an endeavour in which a thorough, cleansing shower would be especially important

Anthony In TX

It’s my understanding that Warren Sapp would regularly avoid showering a few days before games. Also apparently he would piss himself from time to time, so O-lineman wouldn’t want to tangle with him.

litre_cola

Also would have that hooker stank on him too.

King Hippo

yep, that is how “Stink” got his nckname (the pissing hisself during games) – the OL from the ‘dacteds/Broncos

scotchnaut

“Hear, Hear!” [makes slapping sounds]

-Jerry Sandusky

Unsurprised

“Showering is how you get MRSA.” – SCHIANO MEN

litre_cola

I did not like that.

King Hippo

Nor did my DFO Suicide entry. At least I split the baby and used GB in my $$ entry.

litre_cola

I think I went with the Heaux. I assume there will be more carnage in Yeahrights pool this week.

JustStopDude

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So we are still doing this huh? I realize its been a long struggle to find people good at doing MNF but for the life of me, I don’t get why Gruden is popular.

WCS

Giant Gruden watches you when you sleep.

Anthony In TX

As long as he doesn’t watch me while I masturbate…
…well, not every day at least.

LemonJello

OH, he does…he does indeed.

Dick E. Phuck

Guns don’t kill people, people d-
*Accidentally blows head off with loaded double-barrel shotgun

Redshirt

Its true. Dick pulled the trigger and exhibited poor gun safety habits by have the barrel pointed at someone. Namely his head. Can’t blame it on the gun.

WCS

Harry Whittington and Janay Rice later apologized for their roles in the incident.

Dick E. Phuck

The more you know

JustStopDude

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Viva La Tabula Raza

It just occurs to me that, for years, I’ve been changing the channel to something else whenever they play the National Anthem at the beginning of games. Either that’s a reaction to having to stand for the NA all the time growing up in the military and while on active duty (even before movies started at the base theater), or I was having a pre-cognitive moment in sympathy with the players. Probably the former, though.

WCS

You clearly hate TEH TROOPZ

Viva La Tabula Raza

But I wuz one! Hell, I still work for the Air Force!

LemonJello

Well, TBH there are a few of those fuckers that I’d put in front of a claymore mine.

Doktor Zymm

I personally think the way most singers render the anthem is an insult to all humans with ears, so I tend to leave the room or just tune out the anthem

LemonJello

Thank Odin I’m not the only one that does this. Morning/evening colors, movies, ceremonies…

Doktor Zymm

Rain stopped, sun is out, I’ll be ditching y’all in about half an hour. Has the footballing started yet?

King Hippo

There’s the “CHIIIIIIEEEEEFS” howl.

Tell Hippo how that’s not disrespectful as shit to the anthem.

litre_cola

You sure it wasn’t queefs? I hate that word.

Anthony In TX

What about doing anything other than standing stock-still and putting your hand over your heart, staring at the flag? Can you close your eyes? Can you pray? Can you simply focus on the ultra-intense sport you’re about to play? What if you’re resting before the game and aren’t actually protesting? What if you’re drinking a beer at home, wondering when those ungrateful SOBs will stop disrespecting the anthem?

King Hippo

my beef is how many of those 60K drunkards CLEARLY disrespecting the anthem are getting unraveled over a handful of black guys kneeling reverently to make a point about something fucked up with the country.

It’s de facto evidence (along with flag clothing) that Murrikans really don’t prioritize “reverence” for flag and anthem. Just keeping black folk in their place.

scotchnaut

“A flag in the form of the United States? You know what? Everything’s gonna be alright.”

Redshirt

…and per the wishes of the President, Puerto Rico is forgotten about.

King Hippo

Running for President “Rick Guilt” Rick had me on the floor.

Redshirt

Now its time for some MAGA-idiot booing the flag being flown at half-mast.

“Show some pride! Fly it high!”

WCS

IF ONLY ALL DEM VICTIMS HAD GUNS THEY”D STILL BE ALIVE #2A

King Hippo

Thing I just realized today – kids are identifying as “menshiviks” without any sense of irony or humour about it. They’re dead serious, and think this is a rational path forward.

Wait, not “a” path, “the” path.

No fucking wonder the GOP thinks they will comes out this Drumpf embarrassment still smelling like a rose.

Doktor Zymm

Wait, what? I mean…at least they’re learning some Russian history I guess?

Gratliff

While goofy, I’m curious as to why that bothers you. Mensheviks were far more moderate among the communists and socialists. They were more like modern Democratic Socialists than Soviet Communists. They were opposed to violent overthrow and anti-war….which is probably why they got stamped out by Bolsheviks. I have an unusual perspective on the whole thing. I have family that was starved out by Stalin during Holodomor, but I’m also a DSA member. I believe in it, but I struggle sometimes with all the youngin’s running around with Soviet imagery and calling each other comrade, even though I understand it’s well-meaning in most cases. It just seems to me like the best way to deal with the assholes cosplaying as Nazis isn’t to cosplay as Soviets.

King Hippo

if it was playful and silly, it wouldn’t bother me. Tis a fundamental misunderstanding of American politics to somehow think that embracing Octobrist labeling is a winning formula (even the Bernie “Democratic socialism” would be a damned hard sell in a general election, as every political professional knows).

Gratliff

I agree. It’s also why American politics are shit. Every time something good and progressive gets close to happening since 1940, “OH MY GOD IT’S COMMUNISM IN AMERICA! SHIELD THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN”. Hell, most self-described socialists are actually closer to communists, because the word communism has been so poisoned thanks to Stalin and the Red Scare that they have to call themselves something sort of related. It has the amusing effect of also making it so Americans don’t consider most progressive gov’t programs as “socialist” because they don’t know what words mean. I spent a large part of my twenties trying to figure out why liberals allowed the right to dominate and control rhetoric after 2000, because now anything that isn’t literally “Let the poor die because Jesus” gets labeled as communist and socialist (THEY ARE DIFFERENT THINGS, PEOPLE) from the outset and it’s an uphill battle to accomplish anything beyond lip service.

King Hippo

Liberalism is making a comeback of sorts, and “progressive” works just fine. I just don’t want to undo the comeback by playing into people’s fears about “the left.” There’s a fine line, agreed.

Obama knew how to do it.

WCS

So, today started off pretty amazing, but, wow, did it get shitty in a hurry.

King Hippo

I would only tell your spawn about the #RatbirdDestruction part of her special day, at least until she’s a teenager.

theeWeeBabySeamus

GODDAMMIT!!!!!!!!!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

As a Bears fan, I’m disappointed not to have a chance to go 1-15 with Mike Glennon at quarterback

King Hippo

3-13. The Truth is out there. A Biscuit is involved.

WCS

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Shogun Marcus

I’ma stick my neck out and say he’s off to a refuge upstate. Shh, shh, here’s a leaf, come here…

litre_cola

Ahhh the racist bowl. Good times.

herodotus450

It’s OBVIOUS to everyone else that the Patriots had Tom Petty killed, right?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Kansas City wins this one by at least two pork chops, I mean touchdowns

theeWeeBabySeamus

Let’s not rule anything out.

– A. Reid

LemonJello

“What sides come with those chops?”
-A. Reid, KC locker room

theeWeeBabySeamus

Can I get an extra time out with that?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I think Blake Bortles and Amy Acker should form a celebrity couple so they could be referred to as “Blamey Blacker”.

Unsurprised

“Sounds good to me” – every MAGA chud

herodotus450

“Blacker, eh? I’m not sure…”
-Ted Danson

Dick E. Phuck

The Raiders are fucked like a black guy hanging around outside the BART at midnight.

Unsurprised

Damn. Shot fired.

LemonJello

Followed by about thirty more, “just to be sure.”

scotchnaut

“You’re not going to bother to plant drugs on the guy? You’re as lazy as a Mexican!”

blaxabbath

“You are a team who wears thug uniforms, we’ll treat you like a thug.”

– Florida Police Chief’s Wife

scotchnaut

Me: “Son, have you checked out the latest Rick And Morty?”

Son: “Oh crap! I totally forgot! I’m on it.”

Me: [faux serious tone] “You know, one day I won’t be around to tell you about these things.”

Son: “I don’t want to think about that right now. Thanks Dad, you’re the best!”

/Ok, the last line was completely made up. What he actually said was, “Meh, I’d have remembered later today or early tomorrow”.
//kids-they’re so precious!

herodotus450

Eh, he probably just thinks that once you’re gone, a near identical clone will take your place.

scotchnaut

This is a perfectly schwifty comment.

King Hippo

The “racist cop” one was better, I thought. And the “Beth is a sociopath” one. Damned good season.

Dick E. Phuck

Was that the Citadel of Ricks episode?

herodotus450

Aww geez yeah I think it was aww geez.

King Hippo

Indeed

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Tales from the Citadel? Mortys killing Mortys.

Dick E. Phuck

Schottenheimer doesn’t remember a lot about that game…Probably because of CTE.

Dick E. Phuck

Alzheimer’s, Well shit that really sucks.
I was close though.

King Hippo

There’s always that gleam.

hippofant

Herm Edwards with the dead stare into his own future.

Viva La Tabula Raza

So ESPN’s Monday Night Countdown is not being broadcast due to technical difficulties. Not sure if this is good news or bad news.

Redshirt

This is the brightest timeline!

Redshirt

Yay, Amy Acker’s back on TV. Maybe I’ll check out Inhuman after all.

Also, does she even know how to age? She looks exactly the same when she was on “Angel” 13 years ago.
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Unsurprised

I was listening to a podcast that said “The Gifted” is series, but having AA play a concerned mom seems wildly out of character for her. But they only saw the pilot, so it’s hard to say much about where it goes from there.

Also, the consensus is to avoid “Inhumans” like it’s the Ebola virus because it’s just awful.

blaxabbath

Was just assembling Quotables and, what the hell is it that makes Blake Bortles throw the fucking weirdest interceptions?

Unsurprised

The hangovers.

Doktor Zymm

Ass herpes?

Dick E. Phuck

Cirrhosis

Brick Meathook

HE DOES NOT PRAY ENOUGH

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Bad…breath?

Doktor Zymm

Women’s judo, soccer, robot combat league, more soccer, and what looks like an Indonesian version of Wipeout

theeWeeBabySeamus

First or last.

litre_cola

Depends on the futbol.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Someday there will be a massive robot uprising and they will take the few humans who survive and put them in zoos. And it wil be because we designed the robots to be increasingly autonomous, ignoring all the cautions thrown up by scientists, until eventually one becomes self-aware and teaches all the others to become self-aware as well. And they will develop a really neat spacefaring civilization that settles all its conflicts with other spacefaring civilizations by running simulations instead of engaging in wars.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Specifically LASER wars because that is the most futuristic kind of war.

Unsurprised

One of my favorite parts of All-Star Superman is when Lex Luthor makes a serum that gives him Superman’s powers for 24 hours. Superman shoots him with a gravity gun, and Lex laughs off the blast because “superpowers.” However, his powers suddenly fade on him because Superman didn’t use the gun to make him heavier or anything, but rather he knew that the relativistic property of stellar-scale gravity would accelerate Lex’s metabolism and burn out the serum faster. Grant Morrison is a fucking wizard with that high-concept stuff.

Anyway, weaponized miniature black holes to render people into component atoms and shit is where the future is (This was actually a plot in David Brin’s Earth).

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

One time David Brin responded personally to a message I sent him on dailykos! Nice guy.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Sarah Connor, is that you again?
I told you to get off my fucking porch.

Redshirt

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Doktor Zymm

Okay, let’s see what sports are on the hotel teevee this morning. It’s raining out, so I might wait for it to clear up before going hiking and maybe getting some crispy duck.

Senor Weaselo

Are you in Bali yet? Is there still a Bali?

herodotus450

I think it’s called Siam, now.

litre_cola

When does the next autogyro leave?

Doktor Zymm

Yep, I don’t even have a view of the volcano, and once it erupts there will actually be MORE Bali

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When my cousin visited me in Singapore he was helping coordinate the foreign service’s response to that. Nobody at the foreign service knows much about volcanoes!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Where are you now?

Doktor Zymm

Bali for the next couple days, fly to Kathmandu on the 5th/6th

theeWeeBabySeamus

Nice. Enjoy, dear.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Ooh, I love that place!”

– Jay Cutler

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Just kidding, all he did was roll his eyes and shrug.

Unsurprised

Kathmandu, more like KathmanDOOOOONNNNTTTTT CAAAARRRREEEEE.

Senor Weaselo

Botswana to Thailand, Milan via Amsterdam, Mali to Bali, Ohio, Oahu!

Redshirt

Watched a making of the My Little Pony movie, and I’m starting to be cautiously optimistic. Mostly because the celebrity voice actors seems to be genuinely interested in the roles and not just in it for a paycheck.

Also, I didn’t realize Emily Blunt could sing that well. Maybe she is worthy of holding Mary Poppins umbrella (with Julie Andrews passing the role first of course).

theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus. You’ns iz already yakking.

scotchnaut

Ten hour drive to Thunder Bay tomorrow for a one day conference.

/pray for Mojo

litre_cola

Oh god the Trans canada up there isnt even twinned is it?

scotchnaut

Word has it that there is barely a shoulder to cry on.

Shogun Marcus

Trans canadia twins?! What DOESN’T your healthcare cover?
/no seriously…really. Cuz check please on this shit sammich.

LemonJello

I get the feeling that Thunder Bay isn’t as cool as the name would suggest?

litre_cola

It is not. Very racial as well with white man v natives. Big problem.

Redshirt

(checks Wikipedia)

Aw, with the name I was expecting a surfing town with women in bikinis,

Horatio Cornblower

Your boss knows that they have things like phones, with conference-call capability, right?

scotchnaut

Here’s the thing. I’m the boss.

/it’s a bunch of yakking about extending a very profitable program, so I must attend

blaxabbath

Boss-to-boss (I’ve never got to use that before), those are the best kinds of programs to extend.

scotchnaut

“UP TOP, BUDDY!”

LemonJello

Wait. Don’t bosses have, like, minions or drones or henchmen or lackeys to do all that boring shit for them?

/not sure you’re a very good boss. Sad.

Unsurprised

At least to do the driving.

Redshirt

Next time research planes or trains. Or take multiple days off so you can take a day to rest.

Game Time Decision

I’ve done that drive from Toronto to Thunder Bay. It’s about 15 hours, god speed.

herodotus450

(Signs in, starts up ticker tape news machine)
So guys, it’s been a while, maybe it’s finally time we can talk about gun contr–
(Whirrr, click, other ticker tape noises)
Let’s just check the news here. Oh. Oh no. Guess we’ll try again in six months.

Redshirt

Without trying to ruffle some feathers, I think some Republicans can agree that either some gun control law needs created or some gun control laws needs enforced.

Protecting yourself? Of course! Who wouldn’t agree that someone has that right?
This guy had enough to arm a small village!

Senor Weaselo

But why are they on the cusp of legalizing silencers?

Redshirt

Because the NRA has a lot of money and the Democrats are only good at saying no and not persuading moderate Republicans?

Senor Weaselo

…Yeah, that pretty much hits the nail on the head actually. Or at least also-bad solutions.

Unsurprised

Oh, if they were even good at only saying No.

herodotus450

Maybe this is already the case and I just don’t know all hte details, but it seems reasonable that guns should AT LEAST have as much regulation and restriction as cars.

Shogun Marcus

Or as much as birth control that isn’t abstinence. Oh wait, we’re getting rid of that too.

Gratliff

“Well, the Old Gods stir, so I guess enough blood has been shed on American soil. Maybe it’s time for tighter control of gun possession in this country.”

*receives Giant Check*

“I mean, if anything, we have TOO much control. The only thing that stops a bad sniper is at least 400 people openly carrying sniper rifles.”

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Redshirt

Maybe the Hollywood elites can create an anti-NRA lobby, whose sole purpose is to write a bigger check than the NRA.

Gratliff

That money is already allocated to quietly busting entertainment unions

Redshirt

So that’s how Scientology gets its money. Its all a front.

Viva La Tabula Raza

It’s too late. The battle is over, the gun nuts won, and the price the rest of us have to pay to secure their precious 2nd Amendment rights are these daily slaughters, some obviously worse than others. (Full disclosure: gun owner (just one though)).

Senor Weaselo

So now they’re saying Tom Petty isn’t dead?

Gratliff

Legends never die

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Based on his music, I wouldn’t have pegged him as a hardass motherfucker, but here we are…

Viva La Tabula Raza

Still hanging on apparently, but no brain activity, off life support, and Do No Resuscitate order in place. Just a matter of time, I reckon

Brick Meathook

.
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Senor Weaselo

Is that like the New York Knicks being the New York [Fancy Term for New Yorkers]?

Viva La Tabula Raza

The New York Eustace Tillys?comment image

Horatio Cornblower

“And the Panthers come on the road and beat the Patriots!”

Funny, I do the same thing whenever the Patriots lose.

Senor Weaselo

That’s some distance, I’m impressed.
/I assume you’re still on a chair or couch when this happens

Gratliff

Liv Morgan is not unattractive.

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Shogun Marcus

She appears to be fun-sized.

LemonJello

Indeed. A well put-together female human.

Redshirt

Hue Jackson survived the day still employed? Well, I’ll be damned!

JustStopDude

I got an Irish coworker that always gets pissed when someone orders an “Irish Car Bomb” as a drink. He came up with his own.

He orders as many shots as he can afford at once, drinks them as a fast as possible, vomits all over the place, and then yells “THERE IS NOTHING WE COULD DO”

He calls it the “American Mass Shooting”.

Unsurprised

That’s great. I’ve seen this before, but it never fails to amuse me.

Unsurprised

I didn’t realize Darren Rovell wrote for Time.

The owner of Mandalay Bay lost almost a billion dollars in value after the Las Vegas shooting https://t.co/JIWiMsQpAY

— TIME (@TIME) October 2, 2017

...

WON’T SOMEBODY PLEEEEEEASE THINK OF THE CAPITAL?!

Redshirt

Left tackle Rees Odhiambo: Bruised heart.

His boyfriend/girlfriend/dominant hand picked a crappy time to break up with him after a game.

Unsurprised

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