Enough has been said about protests and all that, so I won’t discuss that subject.
Most of the major European soccer leagues are returning soon. Sports are slowly and surely restarting, which is a good thing.
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Sprots News
By this time next week, AFL will have already played the first games since March! I can feel my excitement growing every day. Those of you that are International Members have the Watch AFL package with your membership and can watch through their app.
If you’re not a member, you can still get the Watch AFL app and catch every game. Most games are on the weekends going from the evening to the early morning in North America. Don’t forget to join the Tipping Contest pool!
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Without further ado, here are this week’s dirty dirty Tik Tok girls. Enjoy:
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And now, the next episode of our new feature!
As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!
My aim each week will be to showcase a tune or band from the 80s (the best decade EVAR!) that not many people know about or have heard of. In this way, hopefully these artists will find new audiences and the old audiences can reminisce about what they were doing in the 80s.
Today’s band was named after Mark Sanchez’ theological philosophy. I speak, of course, of Heaven 17.
They were a trio from Sheffield that released their first album in 1982, like last week’s band. I was in middle school then and I was fully embracing the new wave sounds coming from the UK. The first song that was played on the radio (KROQ here in LA and a handful of stations around North America that played new wave back then) was “Let Me Go”.
It was the 12″ remix, however, that would stick in my brain. I absolutely love songs that go 2 minutes in without saying a word. Pure instrumental and danceable bliss:
Again, I invite you to imagine a Young Balls in a dark middle school gym dancing with a cute girl while the long version of “Let Me Go” played. Those are great memories.
Heaven 17 would have another minor hit in Los Angeles with a song called “We Live So Fast”. I’m not really sure if it was all that popular elsewhere.
The band started getting involved in collaborations with other artists and didn’t release another album for a long time. By then, the New Wave days were gone and other styles were in vogue. However, for those two brilliant years of 1982 and 1983, Heaven 17 shone like the stars in the….
Sorry.
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That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and try to maintain the social distancing so that cases/deaths don’t spike and the easing of regulations doesn’t stop. See you next week!
Apparently its just us moose
Darn it all, I did the stupid thing where I fall asleep too early then wake up later for no reason.
Anyways, gifs
Switching to straight rye.
I just made the executive decision to continue drinking until I physically cannot.
Not sure if I’m rooting for passing out or a reversal of fortune.
That’s the spirit!
It got a little out of hand.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orIy18qIaCU
As long as we’re getting serious about drinking songs,
https://youtu.be/4z2yNxfBRM4
Hard to believe this was only five years ago. I was looking for the old Andy n Alex puzzle but wound up here instead. This stupid puzzle ate up like 20 hours of my life.
https://kskkommenters.wordpress.com/2015/05/29/weekly-puzzle-elishas-pen-pal/
Cannibal Andy Reid’s dinner order.
–
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLX5Nym9fcs
“Half?!”
–Any Andy Reid
“Cannibal” Andy Reid is just Andy Reid stuck in traffic in an Uber at lunch.
I’m good for one more, so you fuckers know what that means…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuz750Braks
I was totally expecting you to blow this last opportunity.
Then I refreshed.
And you totally redeemed yourself!
Sounds like my honeymoon.
“Aw fuck, Horatio’s drunk and on YouTube again”
-DFO clubhouse, in unison
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FIUvCTaBeM
It’s times like this we must all embrace our inner Seamus and spam the shit out of the clubhouse with our own terrible musical tastes.
I mean, if you’re gonna invoke his name…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTYq66Tx1GY
This song just rips
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztibpXAryg4
I just got hammered on Peachtree Schnapps and threw up on my shoes because this is so 80’s.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AvuetnVoxIs
https://youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=3D4U3W2d0LA
Thank you for your support
Goddamn the 80’s were weird
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSIn7g1h7YA
Also very 80’s.
–
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfcrjN37e04
Underrated movie.
I thought so too!
Barry Sonnenfeld’s cinemetography was very conspicuous of someone who was going to move on to bigger and better things.
So apparently the two things that kill bigger black men in Minnesota are the police and training camp.
Jesus Christ I should not be laughing as hard as I am at this.
See I can’t be racist because the first time I ever had feelings for someone was Toni Braxton in the “Unbreak My Heart” video. Uncle Ed thought Tyson Beckford looked like ‘that Seal guy without the fucked up face’ though.
This picture makes me horny
It’s just getting me drunk, but if I can make it to 2 am I’ll probably hit on it.
The crowd shots are goddamn outstanding
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80WyBxo0Hto
Also, those boobs are clearly factory add-ons
Her titties are natural; they were stuffed in her signature plastic bra. She did spreads in various adult mags and they were definitely not plastic. She may have had them done later. So I’ve heard.
There’s no way I’m gonna argue with Moose about the breasts of 80’s pop stars. I know my lane.
I heard this from a guy that’s done his research. Well, and Terry Bozzio; great drummer.
In 2009, she was convicted on animal cruelty charges after unsuccessfully trying to rescue sick and feral stray cats.
I have switched from bourbon Manhattans to rye Manhattans.
That’s my story.
We all have to make adjustments to adversity.
Modern problems call for modern solutions.
I’ve switched from heroin Manhattan to Molly Manhattan! All you have to do is cross Houston Street!
“It’s pronounced ‘Huston'”
/Some fucking local when I asked where ‘Houston Street’ was.
It’s actually pronounced ‘urban hellscape filled with Midwest hayseeds who are bored of the country’
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ao-Sahfy7Hg
“Not cool.” – Stedman Bailey
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJwt9qJb6Sw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UEW8riKU_tE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eseCex-rgHs
Huh, I bet you uncultured assholes would upvote Cash’s shitty cover of Hurt over these.
Let’s find out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8AHCfZTRGiI
Not gonna lie, I like Cash’s version, and I like Cash, but it is not getting my vote over NIN fucking shit up.
You mean this one: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hurt_(Christina_Aguilera_song)
I like Cash’s version and never got into NIN, but will very seldom think a version is better than the the original writer/ performer’s version. They wrote it with the artistic intention of how it should come across. It’s a great song and I think that is why Cash recorded his version, some people do do version for that or tribute, others seem to do them for their own ego, or because they think they are a bigger name, or just for plain CASH MONEY.
DC Mayor should get Nobel Peace Prize for her trolling of the orange cunt.
https://www.rawstory.com/2020/06/dc-mayor-trolls-trump-by-lighting-black-lives-matter-plaza-we-turned-on-the-night-light-for-him/
At some point I need to stop drinking and go to bed.
Now is not that time.
My vodka tonic agrees with you
You East Coast guys are my heroes.
That’ll be me getting out of bed tomorrow and going for the Gatorade.
I’m not even wearing a cape.
Yet.
Thanks to Sharkbait for validating my spring drink of choice. I’m drinking double Dark & Stormys in his honour & for my pleasure.
Glad to be an enabler.
[gives Horatio a hug for giving me the inspiration I need to pour myself another Jack Daniels]
Watching Tetsuo: The Iron Man. This is definitely a movie.
Watching the Yankees play the Orioles from last year, just to see if tWBS fucks with me and gives the Orioles a win.
Spoilers: Gleyber goes yard.
Dear Lord everyone sucks
Mel Gibson’s father is right; the Catholic Church really has changed the Scriptures.
That’s a mass I would attend.
(I would not)
Drew Brees PR firm works quick.
That is not the Catholic school I went to.
Would you have enjoyed it more if it was?
Dear god yes.
Not that I would have been any more competent with the (Jerry Lewis voice) LADIES, but at least the scenery would have been better.
Hold out your hand and let me rap your knuckles sharply with this ruler.
We had this tiny old crone nun, Sister Domitilla- I swear it was her real name! She used to run that big old wedding ring they all wore up and down your spine, grinding it in, during lunch if she felt you weren’t suitably grateful for the food. Nasty old bitch, I hope she’s on a rotisserie in hell with Sister Mary Andrew.
Ok, this one made me laugh out loud.
Saving money on the Alpo down to the Winn Dixie, anyway.
Just saw someone with the screen name of W.E.B. Du Brees, which is probably as good as it’s going to get
Damn that’s good
Lots of fun being had at Brees’ expense
A day later, Drew Brees is posting in support of BLM protests. It’s all very stupid and centered entirely around protecting his personal brand, but fun to watch dipshits who were fawning over him yesterday getting very Mad Online about it and condemning the league again. Most importantly, it gives me an excuse to post good Malcolm Jenkins photos.
He’ll hit both knees for the anthem, but the soles of his shoes will say “AD” & “VO”
It is of course disingenuous, but this is also what victory looks like for a social movement. When people start pretending that they always supported you all along, you just grimace and say “oh, of course, we appreciate your support.” And laugh privately, of course.
What the?
“Fox News: Correlation, What’s That?”
Mirror meet douchebag.
Dr. Mrs. worthy. Such a perfect distillation in just a single, unretouched image.
“Up next on Fox News: Part 35 in a series about how black people’s misfortunes help us good folks”
I don’t know if I like how FOX is conflating stock market spikes with assassinations of black people. I hope a flaming C-5A full of flammable liquids accidentally crashes into their office building while they are all in attendance.
As long as the crew is okay.
I think it’s not so much “spikes” as it is the lack of drops. This is the “don’t worry, your 401(k) is safe” counterpoint to the “Antifa is coming to murder you in the suburbs” melody.
“But they still are coming to murder you. Unless the Orange King takes the gloves off and sticks it to those dirty libs.”
Rodney King didn’t get assassinated, he got beat up.
The source and the correlation makes sense, because the wealthy, the rich and their sycophants are fucking assholes.
Randy Rhoads died much too soon in much too stupid of a way
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDVLMS_Yhe4
Yes and yes.