Happy Scottish New Year Open Thread!

As this post goes live, the New Year will be starting in the United Kingdom, Ireland, Portugal, Senegal, Liberia, Sierra Leone, THE Gambia, Guinea-Bissau, Guinea, Mauritania, Côte D’Ivoire, Togo, Ghana, and Burkina Faso.

That also means that the UK is officially OUT of the European Union. Many in Scotland are drinking their IrnBru and pondering how they can get back in either through independence from the UK or other means. Depending on how badly things go across the Irish Sea, North Ireland may be choosing an alternate path away from the UK as well.

Let no one tell you the New Year doesn’t bring new things!

One of the traditions I have is to wish certain things for my friends in the new year. They are different from resolutions in that I am basically coming up with good things to happen to them instead of them coming up with goals for themselves.

As an example, I previously wished for one of my buddies to finally break up with his girlfriend because they were obviously wrong for each other. Two kids and years of marriage later, I stand by my assessment.

In that spirit, please see below the New Year’s wishes I have for a selected group of you:

King Hippo

I wish that a pharmaceutical truck breaks down in front of your house and the sexy bare-shouldered female driver knocks on your door looking for assistance

Redshirt

I wish that you could find another team to root for as the Bengals are not deserving of your fandom. Just don’t pick the Jets.

Just Stop Dude

I wish that the Browns would stop Browning every time they have a chance to not Brown.

Yeah Right

I wish that the Fremantle Dockers would make the Eight so that you wouldn’t have to rely on the Vikings to have a team in the playoffs. I also wish for you to have safe walks east of Gaffey.

Rikki Tikki Deadly

Te deseo lo mejor en el nuevo año y espero que sigas aprendiendo el español para que podamos platicar en español uno de estos días .

Don T

I wish that you would meet a sexy passionate single Latina that is also san… I’m sorry I can’t even finish that sentence. Talk about wishing for impossible things…

I wish that you find a fulfilling and satisfying job in your field and that you continue to perform well in your side gig here at DFO providing us with quality pics of scantily-clad females with either daddy issues or drug problems.

Horatio

I wish that you can take some butchering classes so that your neighbor’s wandering cows can “disappear” and we can all enjoy Horatio steaks by mail order.

Scotchnaut

I wish that the authorities be always one step behind our favourite Northern Ontario hobo enthusiast. I’d add the Horatio butchering classes, but I have a feeling you don’t need them.

Gumbygirl

I wish you and Gumby a safe and fun time in the next few weeks as you watch the stupid valley-dwellers park their cars in the ditches trying to maneuver around the mountain roads.

Doktor Zymm

I wish you a happy return to your travels and secret agent activities. May the wines be sparkling, the cheeses soft, and the missions successful and uneventful.

BeerGuyRob

I wish you a speedy and healthy recovery from your shoulder surgery. Just take it easy on the penis when you are able to get the full range of motion, ok?

Litre_cola

I wish that the Puebla jersey I sent you that ended up in Sydney would actually make its way back to either you or me.

BFC

I wish that you didn’t have to work so hard that you ended up becoming the new Thread Ender after Moose left.

Moose

I wish that you are doing well and enjoying the many Wonder Woman gifs and pics.

bk109

I wish that Santa got you a new tank or tank accessory for Christmas. It’s really a shame your team is Arsenal…

Brick Meathook

I wish your gigantic cock wouldn’t get in the way of shooting a new Freeways of LA video. Video idea: Freeways of LA with Porn Stars. Think about it. Have your people call my people.

rockingdog

I wish for you to find many funnies in the new year and that you continue to share them with us. I love those.

Dunstan

I wish that the neighborhood walks with open containers do not stop for you once the pandemic is under control.

SonOfSpam

I wish I was one quarter of the funny that you are. The best to you and your family!

DTZM

I wish that WordPress would stop doing automatic stupid updates that break the site and that you then have to fix. Thank you for all your hard work!

Sharkbait

I wish that your new house has enough room for a bar and that it’s always well-stocked.

JJFozz

I wish that everyone in your former place of employment catches AIDS/COVID/and syphillis.

The rest of the Canada contingent: GameTime Decision, Wakezilla, and probably more that have not identified themselves as Canadian for fear of being hit up by filthy Americans for places to live

I wish I could live in your beautiful peaceful country, eat ketchup chips, donuts, and poutine all day, and not freeze my Mexican ass off. Seriously, thank you to Canada for making this site as great as it is. Your contributions to the site are not unnoticed.

Portland contingent: Unsurprised, Big Black Richard, Old School Zero, etc

I wish that the smell of patchouli does not stick to your clothes like the tear gas thrown around in your downtown area. Stay strong and clean and safe!

Musical contingent: The Maestro and Senor Weaselo

I wish that your works are discovered by the right people and you are given the opportunities you rightly deserve. Oh, and I wish that the government would make undestructible material out of whatever is inside Weaselo’s asshole.

The occasional commentists: LemonJello, JerBear, monty this seems strange, Mr. Ayo, JimU, theRevanchist, and others I can’t remember right now.

I wish that your schedules would give you more time to comment. Y’all bring the funny and it’s always a pleasure to see your comments.

The lurkers

I wish that you would take the leap and comment on the site. We don’t bite and we welcome new voices!

Finally, I couldn’t close out the year without one wish for tWBS:

I wish that you are finding hot service industry workers that will treat you right wherever you may be. You’re gone, but not forgotten.

I apologize if I missed anyone, but I’m scrambling to write this before it’s time to post. A raise of the glass and a tip of the hat to all of you in the DFO family.

Thank you very much for being here. I wish for all of us to have a happy and fulfilling 2021!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Doktor Zymm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxTHeNHEG7M
BY CHOICE. I’m choosing it

Beerguyrob

Happy New Years you magnificent bastards, you princes of WordPress, kings of kommenting.

Gumbygirl

Rob still has a few painkillers!

yeah right

Happy New Year you magnificent survivor of the knife and the physical therapy and Happy Fucking New Year to you!

Spur

Great movie they just cant make today
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YDo2Ef3Cxw&ab

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, I guess it’d be tough to play suicide for laughs. Which is a bummer because unless I’m remembering incorrectly the Cusack comedies (Better Off Dead and One Crazy Summer) were some of the only 80’s comedies that didn’t rely on gay panic jokes. I guess Revenge of the Nerds didn’t really, either, but then you get into that whole “rape under false pretenses” thing.

Last edited 3 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Spur
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

…and that little boy grew up to be Mike Brown.

Spur

Sorry your mom blow up Ricky

yeah right

Playing true to form but this is my song for this year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4wdbibV3IM

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can’t remember where I saw these guys – somewhere in Echo Park, I think?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jU1If9zLks

Spur

LV Strip is empty. nice people are taking this somewhat seriously

Gumbygirl

Didn’t they have to shut down a mega party on Fremont St earlier?. Or maga party. Either one is equally stupid.

Spur

not sure. know fireworks were only for downtown and at the casino downtown. No fireworks on the Strip. It is getting windy too…

Gumbygirl

It’s getting windy here too. And it’s about 20 degrees. Should keep the idiots inside!

Spur
Spur
yeah right

Three shows I missed this stupid fucking year. Ministry, KMFDM and Front Line Assembly at House of Blues Anaheim.
Rammstein at the Coliseum and the aforementioned Black Crowes at Red Rocks.

Fuck that stupid fucking year.

Gumbygirl
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Best artist I’ve seen on a business trip. You should have seen my face light up with delight when I realized she was playing just a few streets down my hotel (Kristin Havens), one half of this duo.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZI-FTcFtn8

Spur
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Best band I’ve seen play live that I didn’t appreciate at the time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDoqw51G3Do

Doktor Zymm

YES! BOUNCING SOULS ARE AWESOME!!

Doktor Zymm
Doktor Zymm
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Like I said, I didn’t appreciate it at the time. It was at a ski resort – Mammoth, I think?

Spur

Best Coast coming up..

yeah right

Damn skippy!

Gumbygirl

And then we will GET DOWN, brothers and sisters!

Spur

GET DOWN TO BED with a podcast to drift off to sleep to

Gumbygirl

Yeah, I still have a few pages left in my book.

Mr. Ayo

I can’t believe I have to work tonight. Bullshit.

yeah right

Hey it’s the boss…

Line 1.

Mr. Ayo

In my defense, I took all day off until now.

Spur

Happy New Year Arizona Methheads!

Doktor Zymm

Also Coloradans high on altitude! And recreational drugs!

Gumbygirl

Rocky Mountain high!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Band I am most looking forward to seeing play live in Los Angeles once it becomes possible to do so again.

I THOUGHT I WOULD BE MORE THAN THIS!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIitQNXVgb8

Spur
Dunstan

If Spur will forgive me horning in on his turf:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLVWEYUqGew

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Rest In Peace.

Dunstan

I mostly knew John Prine as a guy my dad liked, who I thought mostly wrote funny songs like “Dear Abby.” But there was so much more to him.

And hey, at least he got Kacey Musgraves to write a song for him:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6A-pRJxCKR8

yeah right
Spur
Spur
TheRevanchist
Doktor Zymm

Searching out decent Sally songs for Gumbygirl.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhYNz-0O-XM

Doktor Zymm

This one may be polarizing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsgsi7o1K_g

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh yeah. Somehow I ended up with like six full albums worth of music by Gogol Bordello. More was NOT merrier in this case.

yeah right

Saw them live!

Gumbygirl

Hmmm. I like the song, can’t really decipher the lyrics. It’s a maybe. Better than most.

yeah right

Gypsy Metal at it’s finest!

Gumbygirl

This one is good, never heard it!

Doktor Zymm

This is an interesting find, not sure if it totally counts, but I’m digging it on first listen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8a2T1PeW7Pw

Gumbygirl

I like it. Very Kurt Weil.

Doktor Zymm

It reminds me of something I would see in an anachronistic RenFaire pub

Doktor Zymm

It’s a specific Sally, but gotta love Ska
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1LlObxlUVQ

Doktor Zymm

Older, original version
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZk0HgG-TUU

Top one was second wave, this is first

Gumbygirl

Yes to both of these. Apparently I gave up on Sally songs too early!

Doktor Zymm

Another maybe doesn’t really count contender. Fun Fact: Moby bought a tea shop in the LES and despite spending lots of time on the LES and liking tea, none of us ever went there
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_gPDULwKOkY

Gumbygirl

Nope.

Spur
yeah right

I still have tickets to see them August 31st at Red Rocks THIS year.
Bought the tickets bout 2 year ago. And they’re good for 8-31-2021

It requires travel.

And rooms.

And someone elses food.

I’ve got 8 months to work on that.

Doktor Zymm

8 months is forever, anything is possible

yeah right

East of Gaffey is still a bit harsh. Ain’t gonna lie.

The walk once you get past it is immaculate.

I think it’s the weather and the view and the fact that there’s no fucking 737’s taking off over my bed that seals the deal.

Sorry I left you San Pedro.

I’m thankful for coming back home!

Doktor Zymm

We could almost make this song about the year this song was released….for reference, That 70’s Show was first released in 1998 and was set in 1976. A show released today that was set 22 years ago would be New Year’s Eve of 1998.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CiOWcUVGJM

Spur
Gumbygirl

Ok, there are 3 decent Sally songs, forgot this one!

Doktor Zymm

Not sure if I want 2021 to be harder, better, faster, stronger than 2020. Depends on the implementation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x84m3YyO2oU&list=PLKzSywvokrZ8-A1xJIW5mqGAAYJlvz9RD&index=25

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll settle if it’s just this
comment image

Don T
Doktor Zymm

This one’s a good 20 yr old song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QcdmSX04cE
Although shitty sound quality

Doktor Zymm

The official video is better, and has a neato cat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYxAiK6VnXw

TheRevanchist

Boring show. So boring. If I ever find the writer of this damn show, I’m going to kick them square in the nuts.

Doktor Zymm

Wow, we may only remember the gems, but there was some REALLY shitty music that was popular 20 years ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIcK30k6dwM

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This is tragic because Ash is not *that* bad of a band. I defy you to listen to Jack Names the Planets or Kung Fu or Burn Baby Burn and not find yourself running through a series of brick walls.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5ZtotlZ0ug

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh! This song is almost 20 years old too!

Doktor Zymm

Maybe not that bad, but deserving of being a top ten single for 8 weeks? eeehhhhhh

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Was it really? Wow. I had no idea.

Senor Weaselo

Can’t forget that they had a song in Gran Turismo! (On the phone, it’s late and I’m lazy)
https://youtu.be/sGdDaH4wtxY

Senor Weaselo

Shortened links work? Hot damn!

Gumbygirl

This is my sister in laws dog, Roxie. She is not down to party

IMG_5412.jpg
Dunstan

Still festive. Good dog. 11/10.

Gumbygirl

She is a very good girl.

TheRevanchist

Some fuckwad in my hood keeps blasting fireworks and my poor girl is afraid. I’m not above calling the cops against anyone who fucks with my dog.

Spur
litre_cola

So much wine

Sharkbait

So much or not enough?

litre_cola

Yes

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Who knew that a year coming to an end could fill me with so much fucking joy.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Best show I’ve seen in Los Angeles:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4BATCIlUuQ

Dunstan

Knitting Factory is a good venue

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’ve only seen the one show there. There’s so goddamned many venues in Los Angeles, I’ve probably only been to half of them.

Doktor Zymm

Is that in any way related to the Knitting Factory in NYC? Seems like too odd of a name not to be?

Spur

Great Stern Moment with Goo Goo Dolls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAaDd_CO5q8&ab

litre_cola

Love you all. You have helped me rhrough so much. Laughinh, dancing, laughing, smoking. Seriously you all mean so much to me.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Same same same same same same same same.

Same.

Spur
Gumbygirl

You’re my favorite. Don’t tell anybody.

Doktor Zymm

Cheers! To lots more awesome!

Spur
Doktor Zymm

Thing that was cool about 2020 over 20 years ago? No one gives a shit about any of the Beckhams
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dl15xG3cHd4

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“The guy who bends it like himself!” was a delightful line we encountered while watching Ted Lasso tonight.

Spur
Brocky

balls, to add from the story earlier, it was senor i met in new york. i had an “unown” a rare pokenon, so i offered to coordinate a meetup to help a fellow trainer out

Last edited 3 years ago by Brocky
Gumbygirl

HNY, middle earthers!

Spur

Happy New Years Texas!

Brocky

well despite me and covids best efforts, I’m still here.

fuck you 2020. your legacy will be misery. you are the 2008 lions of calendar years

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

HAPPY FUCKING NEW YEAR THOSE WHO LIVE IN THE DFO TIME ZONE!

Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

This is what I meant to post, no disrespect to Messieurs H and O.
https://youtu.be/x6KkJ6-Ecxw