In a happy coincidence that is in no way ironic or predictive, in the middle of the Great Depression in the year 1934, the Detroit Lions were born. A rich person named G.A. Richards bought the Portsmouth (Ohio) Spartans and, in traditional NFL fashion, quickly moved them to another city to try and make a quick buck. As part of the “incentive” package for him to build the team and a following, the NFL allowed him to host a game on Thanksgiving against the Chicago Bears, who were the defending back-to-back champions.
The Lions lost, but they were able to get a commitment from the NFL to continue to host the Thanksgiving game thanks to Richards owning television stations and securing a broadcast deal. Nearly 90 years later, the Lions are once again hosting the Bears on Thanksgiving.
In fact, Bears-Lions is a very common matchup in history. If you don’t count the clashes in Roman times, they have met 13 times on National Fatass Day. Only the Packers have met the Lions more times on Thanksgiving.
In case you haven’t watched the NFL at all in your lifetime, the Lions have a losing record on Thanksgiving with 37 wins, 42 losses, and an incredible 2 ties.
We’re all feeling another tie, right?
This post is going live (I hope. The gerbil that powers this place pulled a hammy this week and things have been… dicey) at 10 AM DFO time, which is 11 Eastern and 8 Pacific. The game starts at 9:30 AM Pacific, so that means we have about 1 1/2 hours before kickoff.
I’m hoping you’re not spending that time travelling. I heard traffic is horrible. Much better to make yourself a Caesar, start the morning food spread, and get that turkey in the oven.
If you’re into that type of thing.
I myself will be sleeping in today, working out, and then tuning in. I made a pecan pie that turned out pretty good two days ago and we’re having Trader Joe’s side dishes for dinner. We’re only 3 people; a turkey would be a waste. Besides, I maintain that the best thing about Thanksgiving dinner is always the side dishes and never the main course. Feed me those side dishes all weekend and I’m a happy camper.
What are you making for today’s food orgy? Please share in the comments.
Oh, and watch the game too and comment on how badly played it will be. Because it will be. It’s the Bears against the Lions. We’ve touched ourselves all year and this is what we deserve.
Before I go, many people have special movies or TV show episodes that they watch at Christmastime with friends and/or family. As far as I know, no such tradition exists for Thanksgiving.
Well, I’m here to change that.
I could not find the full episode online and I do not know where to find it on streaming devices, but do yourself a favour and hunt down the WKRP In Cincinnati Thanksgiving Episode.
As King Hippo says, it’s MANDATORY!
Here is the best part:
https://twitter.com/MarshallJulius/status/1463812203673497607?s=20
HOW THE FUCK DO YOU GET A 12 MEN PENALTY ON OFFENSE?!
If the Lions win, can you imagine what Dan Campbell will do to that turkey?
Make it do pushups?
Of course I sat Hockey and his underperforming ass.
I traded him for TE Mike Gesicki
I have more faith in the Fins offense then the Lions offense the rest of the season.
I figured he was the only viable target in their passing game but, oh well. I’m rolling with Friermuth now because I suck and make bad decisions constantly.
I would have started him if I remembered to this morning.
Happy Thanksgiving reprobates. My son just found out about the rum Don T gave me, so I expect this is the high point of the day.
At least he didn’t find out about the herpes he also gave you.
Don T doesn’t give people herpes, he bestows it upon them.
And the very BEST of herpeses, k?
My mother made roast chicken (with rosemary + butter), ground beef “stuffing”, and arroz con tocino (white rice with salt pork). She didn’t even bother with a salad, heheh.
The yams I brought (with marshmallows), got rave reviews. And sparked a feisty discussion about The Beetus involving my mother, her husband and another slice of flan.
Troy just called the WFT by their old redacted name. Buck semi-called him out on it.
Man, watching this game is like watching two dead people trying to fuck.
But enough about James Carville and Mary Matalin…
We would also have accepted Mitch McConnell and Elaine Chow.
/you’re welcome
Watch out, Black lady! That cop standing to your right is probably going to shoot you because you are threatening his life with the unidentified weapon you are holding!
I’m still at work here; principal walked in on me invigilating a standardized test here on my prep time this afternoon, and I smoothly managed to shut my laptop without her noticing I was watching the game. PERFECT SUCCESS
fuck EQAO or whatever it’s called this week.
Yeah, the OSSLT. What a pile of absolute fucking garbage.
Remember when they said that EQAO tests wouldn’t be used to judge students, just to evaluate schools and their performance? And then they almost immediately backtracked on it and let schools put EQAO performance as part of students’ final grades? Fuck EQAO.
yep, i think it’s only like a few percent of the final mark, but still. But I’m sure there were lots of kids just fucking around on the test and they wanted some “real” scores
“Time for Tony’s keys to the second half.”
“I need to talk better.”
Well, I’m caught up. Dalton sucks almost as much as Nagy.
I am done my Xmas shopping and I have wrapped everything.
*This has been paid for by the stoners who do stuff corp.
Yahoo’s live prediction for the Bearistocrats! D/ST? 6.66
In a game as unholy as this one, that tracks.
Makes sense, being Bearistocrats-Loins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-iRf9AWoyE&ab_channel=xHolyDiv3rX
Double Dong Doink
That INT was Rocking!!!! 💪
Also legit celebration with the defense 👍
Lionception!!! In da end zonie!
yeah right is Bob Belcher in an alternate universe where Bob is actually successful.
(DJ Taj is Gene)
“…everything the McCaskey family represents…”
Terrible quarterback play and draft choices?
don’t forget the cobweb-ridden vaginas!
I have to get dressed and drive to Riverside to hang with the fam. We bought a new weed pen for the occasion, makes being pleasant and sociable much easier! Happy Thanksgiving, ma dudes and dudettes!
Enjoy be safe
Enjoy the pen!
[sighs]
And the socializiiing tooo.
I’ve roasted a head of garlic, bread is on its first rise and I’ll be breaking out the food processor to shred my 80 dollars worth of cheese for the mac and cheese. Last week’s chicken stock is defrosted for the gravy and I’ll also be mashing potatoes and making green bean casserole and a side of corn. Son in law is smoking the turkey and Eldest granddaughter is making dessert.
Schedule is rigid but I’m right on time.
Happy family day everyone.
I’ll be over in a few hours.
Buon appatito!
Afternoon all, I have a feeling that choosing to read rather than watch the game was a good idea.
Hello fellow American degenerates / Canadian expatriates living in the US!
Well, looks like Swift is going to be decidedly less so for the rest of today.
yeah, that ended my “paying attention” portion of this fixture.
But it’s our Darby!
oy vey, we are facing off in BOTH leagues, and you are gonna gets the clean sheet.
I think you have DonT in Freezer Vodka.
Basketballdown!
Hey, WCS, 3rd and 32??
1st and 30. Just turned it on, but the LioUns are winning?
Turkey is done.
Jamaal Williams’ running style would have annoyed the fuck out of my ex-wife. One of her favoUrite in-game exclamations was always Why is he running straight into the people? What a dumbass!!
The color commentator on the radio is butchering every single name.
“Please do not besmirch the good names of butchers by comparing that man’s work to such a noble profession.” – Coach Andy
You ever pause or rewind something on live tv and then start watching and forget you could fast forward through the commercials? Just me? Ok.
“Can’t say that it’s ever happened to me.” – Trent Green, unloading some laundry from his dishwasher
DOINK!
With playcalling like this, THESE are the Lions we know and cherish.
righteous punt, though!
The Dr. Mrs. is celebrating Thanksgiving the same way she celebrates every day of her life on this earth: by vacuuming.
Recommended for the Dr. Mrs.:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRG3R2FmGlY
not that there’s anything wrong with that
Oh are you saying I’m the one who brought this unpleasantness on myself by having a hangover? I’ll have you know…
I’ve been so busy with work and some weekends away that I haven’t had the chance to watch the NFL in weeks. The first game back on screen for me after so much time away is this Lions game.
I am a deeply sick man.
Call it methadone for the usual dope sickness.
Am very satisfied with the “throw it to Swifty 20+ times” gameplan
Mock the ex-Rams QB at your peril I guess?
kidding, he sucks
JB Smoove is one marble-mouthed sonofabitch.
I will NEVAR not love him for telling Larry David “LD, you put that pussy on a pedestal”
Missed this the first time around. Loving it today.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xzwicesJQ7E
And then there’s this, which bangs:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XQjnCoDgqEM
Lions have to win this right?
Morning Folks. Let’s see how long I can avoid my family today. Am guessing the start of Dallas game will be the start of the “where’s your girlfriend?” talk
Just look nervously at the shovel and bag of lime, they’ll stop asking.
Family is why the good lord gave us liquor and drugs.
“Look. She was a fabrication. Must we go through this again, ESPECIALLY TODAY?!”
Appreciate the Caesar reference Ballsy. They are magnificent.
A great thanksgiving movie is “Home For The Holidays” starring Holly Hunter. Very poignant and VERY funny. Fantastic ensemble cast. Jodie Foster’s directorial debut, and I think she knocks it out of the fucking park.
she wuz just tryng 2 get in Holly Hunter’s pants smgdh
Why would you shake your head? I don’t care who you are, there is nothing wrong with trying to get in Holly Hunter’s pants.
One presumes the ppl of Michigan give thanks for the No-Fuck Lions being off their teevee boxes this Sunday.
Per Rotowire:
Headed for No. 2 role Week 12
/heck, I thought he was pretty #2 last week smgdh
Found a funny;
The hometown urge to point out to your partner every single place you have ever done anything
Current ear worm:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zd9jeJk2UHQ
If they did get another tie and went 0-15-2, that would, by rules of NFL, be equivalent to a 1-16 season.
MANDATORY:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZHkABO0VwCg&ab_channel=jodyvancevids
Daggummit the big boys aren’t getting this footage
https://youtu.be/ZHkABO0VwCg
I just had a big bowl of cereal. That’s probably it for me, unless Shame Pizza is an option later in the day.
I ordered exhausted shame pizza last night after a tofu stirfry……
Here’s my preview of this Bears game, with the coke replaced by urine from the Lions players:
https://twitter.com/harleybaghdad/status/1463573809622048774?t=UFOrLVvMf1qeyaW9I21AlQ&s=19
The German roots in Chicago run deep.
I love that they take turns!