We have TWO scintillating Championship games on tap for your viewing pleasure today. First up:
Euro 2024
Spain v England
All the English are banging on about Bringing It Home and all that shit but the Scots, Welsh, Irish, and pretty much every country that was conquered or harassed by the English is rooting for Spain.
Interesting side note: I am in a pool with friends where we were assigned teams randomly and accumulated points as they won games. Nice meals are at stake. If England wins, I get to pick the restaurant and my friend pays for the meal. If Spain wins, he picks the restaurant and my other friend pays for the meal.
Go Spain!
Copa América
Argentina v Colombia
In a similar way to the Euro, the only ones not rooting for Colombia are Argentines. They already won the World Cup, we don’t need them to be Copa Champions AT THE SAME TIME. God, they would be even more insufferable than they already are.
Interesting side note 2: We also did a pool for the Copa and I’ve already wrapped that up. We also did a Nassau-style wager where we add up the points for both competitions and determine an overall winner. The result of that hinges on the Euro final.
Again, Go Spain!
Who are you rooting for?
1968 Alfa Romeo 33 Stradale
https://ibb.co/S38LYt1
Whoa Jacoby Jones died? Does that start a new three after Shannen Doherty?
Okay, Death. We get it. You feel embarrassed for dropping the ball with Agent Orange. No need to take it out on everyone else.
How did he die? Isn’t he like 39/40?
So far it says he died in his sleep.
Just like Dad when he went out for cigarettes, it’s not coming home.
England reach back-to-back Euro finals
And loose both!
Whoa!!!!!
Whoa, indeed.
🎉
jamás 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
2 more and they’ll be like the Bills in the Superb Owl
THESE ENGLAND STRIKERS, I CALL THEM THOMAS MATTHEW CROOKS, AS THEY GOT THEIR SHOTS ON TARGET, BUT THEY DID NOT PRODUCE THE DESIRED EFFECT!
crook on crook violence smh
Very nice!
It’s over!!!!
Spain win!!!! 🇪🇸
4 time Euro Champions!!! ⚽️
That’s Rockingggg!
Gonna go make some.dinner, meet back here for the Copa finale?
Sounds like a plan to me.
Whatcha got cooking?
Ribeyes, corn on the cob, a loaf of onion/asiago bread we picked up at Publix. A little bourbon to wash it all down.
How do you say “park that bus” in Español?
¡aparca ese autobús!
parkea down here.
Phonetically paLkea
Hahahaha!
ESP defense showing OUT!!! 💪
This 2nd half has Definitely been Rockinggggg! ⚽️
Goooo Spain! 🇪🇸
The Biden press conference and the news are all talking about “We don’t know the motive.”
Motive?
Motherfucker was trying to shoot a fucking mutt.
There. Motive.
He was trying to emulate Kristi Noem?
The Old Yeller defense.
¡está volviendo a casa!
Well, fuck.
WHAT A GOAL!
That was ROCKINGGGG!
My feed seems to be way behind yours, so I was like what goal is he talking about?
That was a killer pass.
Massive save by Pickford
Yooooo!
That’s was Rocking!
This guy may be the goalie we need!
-Toronto sportswriters
Cole Palmer you beauty!!!! Rule Britannia!
GBR Fans definitely are Rocking now!!!
Gotta give them credit. That was a good goal.
Hahahaha!
England counter attack leads to a Palmer strike! 💪
That was ROCKING!!!!
Hahaha!
That’s Rocking! ⚽️
Well, I guess this will end up in pennos.
SUDDEN CHANGE
Well this just got interesting…
THIS ENGLISH TEAM, I CALL THEM MESOAMERICA BECAUSE SPAIN IS DESTROYING THEM
Dammit. Spoke too soon.
It’s ok, you’ll look very prophetic when the English start dropping dead of smallpox during extra time
My last checkout at the Alpine Market German store before it closed for good
Torrance CA, February 2023
Looks like Aaron Rodgers’ last trip to the Castro District.
THIS GUY BRICK MEATHOOK, I CALL HIM ARBYS BECAUSE HE HAS THE MEATS
The once mighty imported German beer section on the last day:
Yoooo
That turn by Bellingham the seeing the 2 ESP players running into each other
Is kinda rocking…
Harry Kane is sub’d out…
Ok then… 🤨
Please use his full name:
Harry Fuckface Kane
And the coach thinks they will need him for the next game. *snerk*
The lad was about as effective as a North Korean missile out there. Southgate had to try something.
Having no Spurs players on the pitch will help a team when they need to win a trophy
England experimenting with the Dunkirk defense it seems.
How many of these guys (on both teams) will be competing in the Olympic diving events?
WOOOOO!
D.C. Half-Smokes
Weenie Beenie, Arlington VA
Ben’s Chili Bowl gets all the love but Weenie Beenie in Arlington is the originator of the half-smoke and still the best:
https://ibb.co/RzhnZT9
https://ibb.co/TK94Lxz
Ben’s chili bowl is overrated
THIS ENGLISH SIDE, I CALL THEM THE LUFTWAFFE, BECAUSE THEY ARE LOSING THE AIR BATTLE
Williams from Spain scores a beauty! ⚽️
Great team work passing & finish!!!
That’s Rockingggg!!!
Not sure if Pickford was guessing or just read the ball wrong.
I would like to sincerely apologize for my earlier mistake. It is Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité. I mixed up my grave and acute accent marks. Merde!
That is a grave error
I am acutely aware. Not a good circumflex on my part.
“It’s ok, people mix things up sometimes. It should become a recurring joke that nobody lets you forget, ever.” — Gumby
RIP Jacoby Jones
I have a wedge of cheese that’s called St. Angel. It’s a triple cream brie with a really funky rind so you can go from pure rich creamy goodness to double funk as you see fit.
It’s fucking sensational.
Here’s a very cool video of dolphins jumping in a sub’s bow wave. This is a very common sight. The music is pretty terrible so you might want to mute it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXs5uA2KAl4
Dolphins love submarines that were occupied by twentysomethings in the 70’s/80’s that won the Cold War all by themselves. That’s just a cold, hard, completely made-up fact!
“I was told that I won the Cold War and I got a coffee mug to prove it!”
OMG! Today is the last time I will hopefully ever see that damn commercial again! That deserves to be celebrated.
Won’t they try to use it during the Olympics?
Please don’t harsh my buzz man. Give me something to look forward to, I need to have this.
Fair enough.
Interesting first half. Not sure what’s in store for the second half beyond more yellow cards.
Time to pack the half time bowl!
Elijah giggles while the Arrowhead Stadium janitors draw straws for who has to deal with Coach Reid’s private toilet.
Spanish players going down like ships-of-the-line at Trafalgar
Lemonjello I hope you and I can both attend a DFOcon at the same time. I think we would really get along.
C’mon Spain, Harry Kane is no Admiral Drake.
Francis Drake>Nathan Drake>>>>>>>>>>Canadian Drake
NO ONE DENIES THIS!
This ref is handing out yellow cards like they were free samples at Costco.
or the free candy from the guy in the white panel van.
I CALL THIS EURO CUP FINAL A COLDPLAY SONG BECAUSE IT’S ALL YELLOW!
“Would you say it’s a shower of yellow?” — Donald T.
Early yellow card for Harry Fuckface Kane.
What does this mean for the Leafs next season?
Early playoff exit
This article has already been pulled by Forbes, apparently…
Gee, can’t imagine why.
LoL!
Imagine being the editor who approved this is the first place!
Lmao!
The AI is still learning.
A computer program is only as smart as the evolved ape who created it.
Yup. Right along with the whole “Black support for Trump will increase due to his being a convicted felon” thing…
I only hope that Trump actually believes it and talks about it.
From your mouth to Cthullu’s aural receptors.
But the author is a “DEI expert” so it must be true. (That is clearly trolling.)
Thought Own Goal was going to appear there for a second.
He’s warming up to come on as a substitute and make a real difference late.
Am finally able to ensconce myself in front of the TV. C’mon Spain! Got my best bunny and my best bong by my sides!
Whatever has the mostest schadenfreude, so Spain and Columbia. Hopefully the rioting is kept to a minimum but climate change, so nawt likely
Euro Final LFG! ⚽️
Hopefully this is Rocking!!!!