Well, we finally made it to the fireworks factory! Honestly, this has been the most entertaining season I’ve experienced since 2011- (had to throw a Giants reference in here in some way) what with the unexpected emergent teams (two of which you’re going to watch this evening!) some mind-boggling upsets, younger players coming to the fore, owners getting exposed in new and interesting ways, etc. It’s been a blast.

As always, we’ll go…

To The Game!

Seahawks/Patriots:

-Yes, New England is the home team, I know everyone was wondering.

Hot Takery Alert?: I really don’t have an issue with this version of the team. There’s no Brady or Belichick to annoy me. “But what about that simp of an owner?” you say. That icky, creepy bastard just got his comeuppance earlier this week by getting snubbed by the HOF. That’s a degree of personal humiliation that folks of his stature rarely experience. I’d also point out that if he were on your team, Gronk would be a loveable goofball but playing where he was he was dragged down by all the crap that was going on around him.

-The O/U sits at 45.5. Do you think we’ll get there? Each team is going to try to slow the game to a crawl and try to stop the opposing run game. The only scenario I see is Seattle running away late with the help of a pick-six or returned fumble late.

-Speaking of, having played a few top 10 defenses Maye has 6 fumbles and is passing at a pedestrian 58% rate this postseason.

-His peer however has nary a turnover yet.

-They usually talk about the D watching film but it seems as though Darnold has been self-assessing himself-(with the coaches help of course) in 2 of their 3 losses he gave up the ball late. Nowadays when he feels pressure he doesn’t force a play and instead throws it away or takes the sack.

-All the kudos belong to Vrabel-let’s not forget that this squadoo was coming off back-to-back 3-14 seasons.

-There’s always an unsung hero that catches a 4th down pass, makes a game-saving tackle, forces a fumble that is recovered by someone else, etc. My pick is 2nd string wide receiver Jake Bobo because his last name is funny. I’m not a complicated/serious person.

-I’d look for a few long passes outside the numbers to JSN in order to try and break the game open for Seattle. If Maye can get the time, look for the same to Boutte, who seems to be the Pats only speedster.

-Methinks that Seattle can afford one, maybe two turnovers and still win. The Pats? If they have 2 or more it’s all over.

As I always say, do please pop in and say hello no matter what you’re doing-we’d love to hear from you. Cheers!

 

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Porky Prime

The Patriots finally can make 19-0 happen!

Porky Prime

Fuck. Well maybe I have the power?

Wakezilla

Hopefully that fan on the field isn’t the 2026 version of the Blackout swing

Last edited 2 months ago by Wakezilla
Redshirt

Mike Vrabel is about to get the ejection that Seahawk deserves.

Horatio Cornblower

I know we don’t want to encourage fans to run on the field by giving them publicity, but if players are going to jack that fan up I would very much like to see it.

Horatio Cornblower

Speaking of which, do we have a location for Beerguyrob?

Redshirt

It should be like Pro Wrestling. You enter the field, you get your ass beat down. Award points to the first player to make the hit.

Petronel

“And tonight, on a very special edition of Jacked Up…”

SonOfSpam

Oh BeerGuy Rob’s on the field. SHOW HIM COWARDS.

Petronel

So does the 28-3 Shanny curse hold in his home stadium even when he’s not there?

WCS

Sssshhhhh

ThePirateSloth

I’m so excited!!!

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Gumbygirl

My shitty, yet really effective vape is working like a champ. And I shared a cheap tallboy beer with my 18 year old cat- I didn’t need much for my chili- so I’m pleasantly slothlike myself. No wonder those fuckers are always smiling !

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THIS SEAHAWKS POINTS TOTAL I CALL IT THE RANGE OF AGES OF TRAFFICKED GIRLS WHO WERE OFFERED TO STEVE TISCH BY HIS GOOD FRIEND JEFFREY EPSTEIN BECAUSE IT WENT FROM 12 TO 19.

Senor Weaselo

Dagger.

Redshirt

This’ll be close.

IMG_3243
Porky Prime

I believe!

Doktor Zymm

A touchdown? Neat! I almost forgot about those!

blaxabbath

“So why did you bet the Patriots?” is the only thing left to ask anyone still watching this Week 23 action.

Unsurprised

Finally! A fucking touchdown!

Mr. Ayo

Game. Set. Match.

HOX!!!!

King Hippo

Back to Prince…Game. Blouses.

Redshirt

Welp, that’s the game.

Horatio Cornblower

Game, blouses

Horatio Cornblower

Collinsworth: “They may just run it out”

Seattle: (throws two straight passes)

DFO: SHUT THE FUCK UP, CRIS!!

blaxabbath

When will the Patriots begin with the more evident cheating?

Petronel

Right around now might be advisable.

King Hippo

SeaTruthers can’t possibly risk a forward pass. The remainder of the game.

yeah right

I’m still thinking shutout.

King Hippo

At some point, there will be pity.

Doktor Zymm

No pity in the Owl!

Wakezilla

Please C-TRUTHERS, get a tuddie here 🙏

Unsurprised

Is that Scott Hansen in Gold Zone?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Chris Hanson since this game isn’t going to sniff 18

Last edited 2 months ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Gatoraids

think he was there in other olympics

The Maestro

At the start of this season, Will Campbell said he’d absolutely be willing to die for his quarterback. I say it’s high time for me to act on this statement after that last fumble.

Gumbygirl

I already knew I was speshul, mmmkaythanks?

Horatio Cornblower

No one who wasn’t speshul could be our favourite!!

Beerguyrob

I paid how much for this?!

att.nI9II3UmQ0dA4jdVoBwwd9Ppbq2rTCxZIRmz3AuhPbg
Doktor Zymm

Drake Maye is getting lots of hugs from the Seattle D tonight!

Porky Prime

The AFC of the 90s has returned.

WCS

Started last year.

Bogdanski

D lineman about to have 6th kid? I guess they’ll play against Rivers’s’s kids

Horatio Cornblower

They’ll be badly outnumbered, but sure.

Horatio Cornblower

Also, can check…

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Elysian Space Dust here

Horatio Cornblower

Oh, so a nice light 8.2%!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just taking er easy

Unsurprised

Wait. Didn’t the Patriots get shut out against the Rams?

Doktor Zymm

In LIII? It was 13-3

Col. Duke LaCross

SUDDEN CHANGE!

ThePirateSloth

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WCS

Nice of the GREATRIOTS to turn the ball over already in field goal range. Just kick now, Seattle.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sudden lack of change!

Mr. Ayo

HOX!!!

Gatoraids

trying to get through this San Francisco game anyway we can

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtTHfOBbYuk

Horatio Cornblower

Moar liek Drake Maybenot, amirite?

WCS

Definitely a far cry from last year’s Chef dismemberment.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh, I may need to switch from beer to bourbon to survive the fourth

Downfield Matriculator

Collinsworth just jinxed the shutout

Wakezilla

Sam Darnauld has gone back to his Jets form. Tough break for the C-Truthers

Redshirt

Good for my parlay. I doubt it will hold up because I’m one quarter and there’s always a F-U TD pass.

yeah right

But the other team has no offense.

Redshirt

AND THE PUNTERS TAKE THE LEAD, 13-12-0!

Horatio Cornblower

Sorry for the gap in my commenting; the cod sandwich I had for lunch caught up with me and I had to take a Collinsworth.

Unsurprised

Jesus Christ. Thank God they didn’t resurrect Richard Attenborough.

This does, however, prove that Jon Hamm can eat shit and die.

Also, my DraftKings/The Last Boy Scouts idea is hardly in bad taste when all things are considered. Resurrected Taylor Negron, Noble Willingham, and non-dementia Bruce Willis, plus Danielle Harris and Damon Wayans celebrating how the villains of that film totally fucking won would be icing on the shit cake of this shit world.

Last edited 2 months ago by Unsurprised
Porky Prime

Spared SOME expense.

Petronel

AI Sam Neill was…underwhelming

yeah right

I just threw up in my Budweiser.

Porky Prime

Thank god the flavor was unaffected.

Horatio Cornblower

if anything it would be enhanced.

Petronel

Budweiser: MURICA FUCK YEAH

King Hippo

Did JSN not pack a spare foot smgdh

Redshirt

Good. Gives Walker another lineman to block.

Gatoraids

paying 13 bucks a 12 pack and Coke cant come up with a super bowl commercial , how the country has fallen and bud cant afford one til the 2nd half

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