Please, allow me to extend to you some traditional Canadian US-Thanksgiving hospitality.
Have a slice.
Maybe make a small plate and take it into your den, because I hope you’ve got room for one more game. Your old pal Roger has gifted you the Steelers & Colts. YINZERS & HUMPS, BAY-BEE!
News of note:
- Injuries:
- HODOR is out. He couldn’t clear concussion protocol in time, which is also the euphemism Jim Irsay uses to explain why he can’t make a court-order drug test. So get ready, fantasy owners of the Steelers defence, it’s TOLZIEN TIME!!!
- listed as questionable: Donte Moncrief (hamstring)
- Steelers backup RB Karlos Williams has been suspended 10 games for a second substance-abuse violation this season.
- will-play-but-injured: Sammie Coates (fingers)
- HODOR is out. He couldn’t clear concussion protocol in time, which is also the euphemism Jim Irsay uses to explain why he can’t make a court-order drug test. So get ready, fantasy owners of the Steelers defence, it’s TOLZIEN TIME!!!
- John Madden took a run at having Thursday football every week, and how it makes the games bad. Somehow, some way, Goodell is going to try and find a way to punish both NBC and MCI Coach. (FYI: Here’s a link to a story about the old Madden cruiser.)
Pittsburgh at Indianapolis – 8:30
On paper, this shouldn’t even be close. Luck is sharing pain meds with his owner, and one of his key receivers has a gimpy leg. Jim Irsay has probably been screaming Peyton’s name at Ryan Grigson all day, druggedly alternating between demanding he be signed by 5:00 and trying to force-feed their other quarterbacks Brain & Nerve Tonic to try and replicate what they did to Manning. Scott Tolzien is not a good quarterback, so the full “Blitzburgh” defence should be on display in order to keep him guessing and provoke numerous three-and-outs & more turnovers than a Sara Lee factory.
[FYI: Sara Lee is owned by Bimbo Bakeries USA, the American corporate arm of the Mexican multinational bakery product manufacturing company Grupo Bimbo. Make sure to point that out after racist Uncle Karl finishes his slice of pie.]
AND YET! We all know that this is the kind of game that also gives rise to the “Shitsburgh” moniker. Ben should be able to pass for 500 yards to AB et al, but yet something inside Mike Tomlin always seems to make him either take pity on the opposing team or try experimentation because it should be that easy, with both concepts ultimately leading to a Steelers 2-point loss. It’s the kind of game where he tries to use the wishbone formation with a flea-flicker thrown in. It’s maddening yet predictable. If Sill were still here, I know what he’d say
Anyway, enough talk.
Prediction: Steelers 38, Colts 10.
If they were at home, I’d take 14 points off the Steelers, because of the cuteness factor. But on the road Tomlin’s less likely to try the bullshit.
Hopefully, you’ve sent the relatives home and can enjoy the game on your own terms. Alcohol is mandatory. PANTS ARE OPTIONAL!
Hey everyone, off to bed but hoping everyone had a nice holiday.
I’m a mailman, so…this next month is going to be a bit of a gauntlet. Basically, see you next year.
Have a good one Porky!
Holy shit. My neighbor was a mailman in ABQ for fifty years. Finally retired in like 2011-12.
Take care man. Best wishes to you and your family.
Dance party?
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/op5q3qg639.gif
Seinfeld > post game coverage.
Tivoed Archer for me
Die Hard is playing on repeat on Canadian TV. Commercials, but all the swearing.
Best Christmas movie.
Even with Anti Semite Gibson, I maintain Lethal Weapon is a slightly better Christmas movie
On a much lighter note: I had a good Thanksgiving. Hope everyone else here did too.
I see I made the right choice turning off the game with Pittsburgh up two scores in the first half.
Switched over to local news and commenced gnawing on the ham bone like some kind of Raiders fan. Prob time to call it a night.
Any sentence that ends with “like some kind of Raiders fan” is probably good cause for self-reflection
I have to fucking work tomorrow.
Not retail.
Stupid Air Force.
Stupid national defense.
I actually love my job.
Let’s see what happens when I press this button.
Same here, but Navy.
Yep, if the customer is open guess we’re open.
“Let’s see what happens when I press this button.”
Nice Trump impression.
The last line between him and Armageddon is a military officer who I hope would sooner beat him to death with the nuclear football than unlock it for him.
My last job I went to work on black Friday. My boss and I were the only people there. After an hour she just told me to go home. Even with lots of people there, I’m guessing tomorrow will be a laid back sort of day, hope it’s fun!
Time to start burning shit down, this place is boring
img/68/6878dd670dd6b43b02d068b7200ae5c6d923ddb08133a8aff32739cff7465740
http://m.quickmeme.com/img/68/6878dd670dd6b43b02d068b7200ae5c6d923ddb08133a8aff32739cff7465740.jpg
I dunno why it gets on my nerves, but it always bugs me whenever they say “Steeler (or Patriots or Packers) fans travel well!”. I’m willing to bet most of them actually live there.
It’s basically saying that those cities are crappy enough that lots and lots of people leave, but not quite so crappy that they can’t afford to leave.
Ha! Joke’s on you! New England isn’t a city!
*remembers is currently in New Hampshire.*
Fuck.
It’s not that they live there. They travelled there for the last road game, and the gravy & salt consumption led the doctor to declare them unsafe to travel back home.
That’s why Indy is such a large city.
Do they schedule the shitty games last on Thanksgiving because they assume everyone will be too drunk/asleep to care?
Paul: still a shill, just changed shirts
yeah NBC, we really needed that “no coaches’ challenges during last 2:00” for this shitburger
Welp the dinner is done and the inlaws are gone. Football sadly is over. Happy fkn holiday, peoples
the shittiest Shitsgiving that ever was shatted out!
There’s probably some news footage of people killing each other to buy shit at Target, that’s sort of like football, but no one is a winner.
We are because we’re not them.
but we could be watching a REAL LIVE MURDER!!
One could hope
You as well.
Hope you some help with the dishes.
Farmers: we’ve seen some shit
Due to the presence of actual no-fucking-shit Nazis now being allowed to roam free in the land, grammar nazis will now be the Alt-Write.
Can we hold this one in reserve for next week’s Banner Comment?
I want to get really really really fucked up
Pass that shit on over brother man.
Still time for a Hodor? Hodor.
Man, I wish there was more football on after this.
I watched an intermittent 5-10 minutes of football. I’m clearly not ‘Murican enough.
I missed most of the first game cause cooking, the second game was good, but DC lost which was disappointing when they played as well as they did, and this game has made me wince a whole lot, so football watching has been a bit hit or miss for me today. Another game would give me another chance.
I had to listen to the end of the two good games on the radio, like it was the 1950s. But I got home for almost all of this mess.
At least not according to Grandma. (Or whoever that was from your earlier story.)
Why the fuck does an adult elf onsie exist?
Something Something Millenials
Hey thats my fetish
I’m sure you have a co-worker that could answer that question for you.
Alright. Steelers won. I’m hitting the stuffing.
Night.
Isn’t it about time someone posted the “He’s aleady dead!” Simpsons gif?
http://116.imagebam.com/download/QL7svInQ0wEv7h399y6o2w/49059/490583880/584333.gif
Indianapolis : Where QBs go to have their virgin brains sacrificed to the concussion gods
Garbage yards may now commence
Blake Bortles: You called?
Boss Todd looks like he’s about to send a disappointing and unsolicited dick pick.
http://gif.mocksession.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/TODD-HALEY-F-U.gif
I just had the very frightening thought of Boss Todd on Tinder
LEFT! LEFT!
Can someone send me drugs? Now!
you didn’t raid the medicine cabinet during jubilee time? AMATEUR
Chris Hardwick stars in: It’s Not Plinko!
The wall: plinko on steroids?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j73OsXo19vI
We’ve gone full 70’s tonight.
Read your caption first and honestly assumed it was a youporn link. Which also makes sense
How many scores is that Antonio?
That’s four pumps, definitely more than two.
Why are you fucks watching this minutes before it airs on the tv I’m watching?
We’re from the Not Too Distant Future.
My real name is Slightly Newer School Zer
Next Sunday A.D.
Good news? My fantasy opponent benched Prater for Boswell. Cost him like 9 points. Bad news? Uh…a minor matter in the form of Kirk Cousins.
Please see banner quote.
So pissed I started Cam instead of Kirk. I kinda knew he was gonna have a good day, even in a loss, but it’s so hard for me to have any sort of faith in him.
YOU don’t LIKE THAT?
In a sense…took ALL the stress out of my Sunday. So, I can thank him for that.
BOSS TODD has a pretty damned fine hobo beard going.
Goes well with the IROC Z28 on blocks on the front lawn.
Prayer circle over, that was extremely fucking uncomfortable
Fozz, are your sins absolved through being in the same room, or has Bleergh already condemned you to a life betting on Shankor?
Bleergh done cast this sinner into a deep pit. It’s more fun down here
ALL TEH FANTASY POINTS
Will Smith stars in: Oscar Bait
a/k/a Hippo’s 4th undiagnosed stroke
Pursuit of Happiness 2: Life Sucks Again
Hey, that’s still a pretty long way for a high school janitor to throw a football. AND he made the tackle! That’s first-rate personal responsibility right there!!!
Ballgame?
Yup.
My wife made a sweet potato boob joke from Vinatieri’s clip just now. *pours more wine*
You need to use this to your, and hopefully her, best advantage.
Thanksgiving, NBC style. The black guy likes collard greens ,, no ofence.
WHOOOOOO IT’S RV SALE TIME!
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/8/3316/640/CIMG1515.jpg
That’s….unfortunate
Only if your name is Tom.
Where Ben gets his RV?
Hide yo turkeys!
So, the chestnut puree I made turned out to be one of the most delicious things ever, and I just discovered there’s no need to heat it up, it’s almost even better cold!
Damn. That sounds amazing.
This is basically the recipe I used, except I roasted my own chestnuts, added thyme with the bay leaf, and used cream instead of milk.
http://www.lindasitaliantable.com/chestnut-puree/
That sounds awesome. I have a feeling that would work well with macadamia nuts too.
Oooh, that would be good. Though one of my favorite parts of macadamias is that unique sort of crunch that they have. Glazed macadamias…mmmmm.
That was definitely a telestrator dick
Why aren’t they showing the AFC finalist banner?
I hate to get personal during the footballing, but I gotta share this:
My son is 20 years old, works and is a full time student; he still lives at home while going to school. I started a load of laundry tonight, while checking his pockets I got a surprise! No, not coke, crack of even the dreaded Mary Jane…but a single individually-wrapped condom. I was caught off guard to say the least, but then I remembered he is 20 and has a girlfriend, so I can’t help but be cool with it. He’s currently in Houston visiting his older brother, so I think I’ll just leave the condom by the sink in his bathroom and say nothing. He’s a genuinely good kid, and I can’t help but be impressed by him acting responsibly.
I had to vent, thanks for listening!
Sounds like the right reaction. And kudos to him for being safe!
Is the right call. I mean he is 20. No need to call him on it. My mom took out the trash in my room once before I could, and damned if a used condom stuck to the lid on the way out. I was 16. All she said when I got home was way to be smart, now go get rid of it.
I’ll admit I’m glad I didn’t find a used one.
I think according to DFO rules you’re supposed to slap him on the ass and say it’s great hustle.
Singapore Air has some pretty good Black Friday fares, valid through September, if anyone’s looking for a trip. Under $700 r/t for pretty much anywhere in Europe or Asia.
I’m still waiting to hear about my China itinerary in December, because I need to read up on airline policies and see if I need one of my grandfather’s beater violins.
I’ll actually be flying all around Southeast Asia through most of December, including Singapore. Already have my reservations of course…too little too late as usual.
wait, if HODOR is supposed to be resting his brain owie, why is he trying to explain how footbaw works to the guy off the street they gave twenty bucks to pretend to be his backup?
So, can we just start drawing dicks on the screen? I don’t even mean waiting for a replay. Just right now. All over Dungy’s face, even.
Writing on balloons with a Sharpie will eventually eat through the rubber and pop the balloon. I know this from college, when we tried to give our friend a balloon girlfriend for his joke birthday gift, but she kept dying.
I think both teams pretty clearly have money on the other side.