We shall get to the title sequence in a moment, suffice to say it represents a real statement moment for my wolven sort.
First, the morning Lesser Footy, kicked off with a monster matchup, Spurs invading Old Trafford (7:30, NBCSN). #3 at #2, and all that separates them is goal differential, with each on 20 points. Harry Kane v. Romelu Lukaku, easily the two best players in the League. Yes, wake up for it.
West Brom’s hopeless home tie against Man City (NBCSN) highlights the 10:00 window. Seriously, City’s goal differential is +28 after just 9 matches. That’s UNLV in the early 90s material. Liverpool and Huddersfield Town play on CNBC (hangover from winning at United?), with Arsenal v. Swans being the best of the paid/streaming fixtures.
Once again, the spotlight dance is forgettable, Chelsea/Bournemouth (12:30, NBC). JV NFL is better.
Sunday’s doubleheader starts light, with 12th position Brighton & Hove hosting 10th place Southampton (9:30, NBCSN). These sides are pretty boring. Next, bigger names with shittier records, as 18th position (yikes) Everton visit 14th place Leicester, both boasting new managers – Everton’s being of the interim varietal (12:00, NBC). Both sides should have the “new manager” burst of emotional energy, and each has more skill than they’ve shown in the early going. Perhaps they will entertain us, until Red Zone kicks off. Damn the British time zones shifting differently from ours.
Oklahoma State at West By God Virginia (Noon, ABC)
A tasty appetizer ahead of the loaded 3:30 window, give us all your Big 12-ish offensing, please.
Cal at Colorado (2:00, Pac12)
Super interesting for these sides to play so early in the day, and the pickins are slim early on.
NC State at Notre Dame (3:30, NBC)
Here we go! The banner pic is from the game in Raleigh last year, played in Hurricane leftovers. State dominated, as the foundations of this season’s team (good OL, great QB, dominant DL) were finally starting to come together, and the pitiful secondary was neutralized. In my mind, this is still a matchup that heavily favours the wolven sort, with the chance to pick up the most important road win in perhaps the last 30-40 years of the program. A victory surely takes NC State into the Top Ten itself for a home showdown with Clemson next weekend essentially for the division title. No pressure, guys!
Paedo State at Ohio State (3:30, Fox)
Get. Fucked.
Georgia at Florida (3:30, CBS)
The World’s Largest (Forgotten) Outdoor Cocktail Party, we shall see if the Gators can manage to be more than a speed bump on UGA’s road to Roll Damn Tide.
TCU at Iowa State (ABC/ESPN2)
This is a really interesting, and surprisingly important game. Why not move it to tonight, when somebody might fucking be able to watch the thing?
Mississippi State at Texas A&M (7:15, ESPN)
Ah, the always entertaining SEC West undercard fixture. This one could be pretty wild and back-and-forth.
Tennessee at Kentucky (7:30, SECN)
UK always manages to blow it against UT. This seems almost served up on a silver platter for the Wildcats, so they will twist themselves in knots to fuck up. FUN SHIT.
Washington State at Arizona (9:30, PAC12)
Everyone done forgot about BEAR DOWN Foar Midterms, but they’re 3-1 in the League. Beat Wazzu at home, and you are looking at a title game contender. Not ded yet, eh, Rich Rod?
USC at Arizona State (10:45, ESPN)
Fresh off a butthammering in South Bend, the Troi Boiz highlight the tweaker match in Coed Valhalla. This always makes for interesting viewing, though I have no idea what you will get out of either football squadron.
And my hope Baylor goes 0-12 stays alive.
One of the first college games that stuck in my memory. I loved underdogs and West Virginny had lost to Penn State 18 times in a row.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DoJs-cDlew0
Welp.
@Hippo…. daU w/ 11pt cushion, U*NC punting away with 6 1/2 to play.
Cane D should hold onto that
Jesus, WSU/OSU o/u is 77.5!
good, wet and cold in South Bend
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6GuEswXOXo&ab_channel=milkshake30
White men can’t jump (and catch at the same time).
I’m just glad that wasn’t picked.
https://247sports.com/Article/Meet-CFBs-most-versatile-weapon-NC-States-Jaylen-Samuels-109425818
tl;dr : He good
yup
I am liking this.
Since the Vikings game starts so goddamn early tomorrow I’m thinking of trying the old “Let’s start drinking really early, pass out early and wake up in time for a 6:30 AM game” tactic.
It’s never failed me before.
Actually, you’ve got until 9:30.
/giggles
This is mostly true since I’ll DVR the game anyway.
Cousinfuckers just got two insta-TDs and now within 6 of BDSM State.
Hippo, I hope you got a good look at the shoulders of the sideline reporter in the Miami game.
Can’t, fookin’ Holes might win if I flip over there. Bad enough tWBS is watching.
I always watch those assdicks when they suck.
I ain’t tempting fate.
So starting anyone on the 500’s is probably not a good idea this week huh?
Nope. Yet I am stuck with Hopkins in my money league. For some reason, our Friday waivers (when I tried getting Sanu) didn’t go through.
Weather in NJ supposed to be nasty anyway.
The one bloody time I get to watch the Cherries on national TV and they get fucking blanked again.
We’re gonna get relegated I just fucking know it.
it ain’t lookin’ good
/then again, my Toffees are your neighbours right now
But they’ve only scored like 2 fucking goals all season.
Maybe they get better at Newcastle next week.
Guy has been standing in front of the line at Tim Hortons for at least 3 minutes. He gets called up and that stupid shit doesn’t know what to order, leading to a longer queue. Ultimately, after anout another minute, he orders a fucking coffee. I am legally allowed to kick him on the dick, right?
He’s not your Guy, Friend.
Canada Day I was bartending and the crowd was at least six deep for at least 8 hours. Some guy gets to the front and yells, “Buddy! I’ve been waiting for a while now!” I served two others before I got to him and said, “What’ll it be?” He hemmed and hawed and said “I’m not sure. Honey, what do you want?” She didn’t know either.
I was a bit frazzled so my response was “Are you fucking kidding me?” [pointing to the guy right beside him] “You. What do you want?” He rattled off his order and I turned to the first dude and yelled “THAT’S how it’s done. Get it?”
/I’m a little worked up just typing this
You did God’s work.
daU/U*NC color commentator (after daU return man brings the kickoff out and gets crushed): I think that was a bad decision to bring that ball out.
And he gets paid for this opinion.
Woke from my Benadryl nap. Looks like Johnny Reb/Pig Sooey is all they is, competitive footy-wise. Terrible, but sorta fun (shootout)
Miami (FL) v unc just, got, interesting.
you can bet your rebel ass I ain’t watching THAT one unless the Canes make it a shitshow
/I did note that ESPN all of a sudden brought back U*NC sidebar game comments, after going silent during VPI’s throttling last week. FUCKERS
They are spending most of the game talking about brain ice packs and new jerseys
Do commentators not actually watch the game they are calling? That’s about the only explanation I can think of for the stunning idiocy of most of them.
Buffalo @ Akron is the best game available right now.
Plus you get to say “Zips” a lot.
Scatman Crothers and David Lee Roth agree.
Checking in from my buddy’s bachelor party. The hangover has subsided enough such that I can pack everyone into the minivan and drive an hourish to Firestone Walker’s Barrel Works brewery. Since I have to drive back, I’m preparing to spend probably $60 on bottles. Liver’s morale is high at the thought of a break.
Apparently the Factory is a tariff-proof export.
https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/browns-forced-to-evacuate-from-london-hotel-early-in-the-morning/
“It was a gas leak, and we’re all fine,” coach Hue Jackson explained. “The real hero here is DeShone Kizer, who personally tried to find and stop the leak, but was overcome by the fumes, judging by the fact that we found him passed out with his head in the oven here.”
I started watching the Wisconsin game, but then I say Tuberville commenting. Seeing first hand how he pretty much destroyed UC and walked away, caused me to fill with a rage that permeated long after I changed the channel.
I’d be pretty happy about Miami losing any other week, but not this one.
C’mon ‘Canes, you’ve got one jorb today. Don’t fuck it up.
All work and no play makes Redshirt a dull boy.
How long has it been since you last saw a play?
/you just got dad-joked!
Nice one, Daddy Scotch. Actually, it was a year or two ago. I was dragged there by my family for my sister’s birthday present. It was “Anything Goes”.
If I do eventually snap, Criminal Investigators are going to call that my “start of darkness”.
Last one I saw was Rent. Gay stepson wanted to see it.
Neither of us liked it and I had “525,600 minutes” reverberating in my head for weeks.
Quack quack quack!
“I don’t mind dull boys, they’re a lot easier to talk into getting in the van.”
Marc T., Toronto
Maybe my slow-poke son can get all his shit together so I can drive him to the lake, drive back, watch the football and drink some sweet, sweet nectar.
Unrelated to anything, but I’m pretty sure Lisa Loeb has not aged.
Still plenty of time for West Ham to fuck this up.
Yep. There it is. I feel so bad for Bílic. He seems like a genuinely good guy.
I know they flopped in America because America can’t have nice things, but, damn it feels good to have Jay and Dan back in Canadia.I adequately enjoy stupid sketches like this. One caveat though: Kate Bierness’s finisher should be called Shattered Dreams because there’s no way she’s that perfect.
/Edit: Just remember she’s a Bears fan. Never mind.
http://www.tsn.ca/jay-and-dan/video/tsn-battle-rumble-onrait-vs-o-neill%7E1243779
so…I guess Yuli Gurriel is all like NO SMIRE this morning, eh?
*squints* …nope it doesn’t look that way. Though my perspective could be slanted.
Holy shit, it just hit me that there’s still 2 weeks left of the CFL regular season and it’s October 28th. The hell are they doing to take so long? It was only a few years ago, the season ended early November. This league isn’t popular enough to draw out the season. This cheerleader is going to die of pneumonia when the Grey Cup weekend ends up in Saskatchewan.
How the hell is she going to catch a football with those gloves?
/I’ll be in my bunk ‘out-kicking my coverage’
“/I’ll be in my bunk ”
Funnily enough, that’s how her gloves’ stick’em is made.
Just be sure to have adequate protection by locking the door. You don’t want a free running gunner to “interfere with the opportunity to catch the kick” if you know what I’m saying.
Erik Karlsson has only played 6 games and he’s already tenth among defensemen in scoring (which is only 3 points behind the leader). He’s coming for you, Alex Pietrangelo!
Either his foot is going to completely heal and he’ll run away with the scoring race by February, or, he may have come back too soon and will be out for most of the year by December. I’m still not sure which way it’ll go
I am so gassy
don’t you hate it when you go to bed that way and wake up in the same state? Seems so unfair.
Tell me about it. I downed 20 Timbits last night for the first time and ages and now my farts and this morning shit is sugary lethal. Minus the sugar.
I really can’t declare anything #Mandatory since the decree is already thrown down for tomorrow am’s #ThePauls/Vikes tilt, but I really do strongly encourage watching State/ND in the 3:30 window (with TCU/ISU as your flip option). It will be an old-school trench war, with real NFL-quality players, and I think a very evenly-matched game. State’s QB and OC will make the difference, and hopefully outweigh ND’s vast kicker advantage.
give the Paedos no ratings
I will be at a wedding, held at a megachurch. A young coworker of my wife’s who has known this guy for a little over 6 months. He appears quite…fabulous. Did I mention they’re both virginal until-marriage types? I’m viewing this as a fascinating sociological and anthropological study.
Give the happy couple a Fathead of Aaron Rodgers that they can put on the ceiling and make sure the pastor tells the husband it’s not a sin for the wife to be on top.
There’s nothing in the Bible about pegging.
I had a girl buddy from high school do the same thing. When I met up with her before the wedding I could practically hear her clock ticking-absolutely desperate to be ‘in the family way’.
Notre Dame getting its ass kicked?
I’LL BE THERE!
“Real NFL-quality players eh? Interesting…”
-Giants GM Jerry Reese
I can get onboard with rooting for NC State against Notre Dame. Hell I can get onboard rooting for Jabba the Hut against Notre Dame
Never thought I would be rooting for Ohio State.
It is still simply baffling that Penn State can run a pedophile ring for over 10 fucking years and nothing except removing a fucking statue of the guy that let it happened was their only punishment.
Paedo State footbaw and U*NC…well, everything, deserve a special place in hell. Along with the NCAA for enabling and looking the other way at same.
That said, the NCAA letting Paedo State out of gaol early (for no reason and despite showing no real remorse or penitence) was the first major signal they were gonna let the Holes off completely.
There’s even a Putin connection here, srsly:
https://www.gq.com/story/donald-trump-shady-scheme-to-buy-nfl-buffalo-bills
Is the barren moonscape of Buffalo most similar to Russian Winters?
Strong Tundra! Strong Circling of Wagons, Da!!
Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line, but never, NEVER engage in a land vehicle tailgate-based drinking war in Buffalo!
Flipped to Huddersfield, WBA and City each scored w/in 5 minutes. SHIT
WBA held out until the 10th minute. Now the battering should be on.
This makes me wonder – what JV NFL side has the most victories v. the Fookin’ Irish whilst still remaining unbeaten? Surely someone tops NC State’s 2?
Looks like Chicago takes the cake with 4.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Notre_Dame_Fighting_Irish_football_series_records#Record_against_opponents
I would have guessed Oregon State, they just have 2.
And don’t sleep on “Indianapolis Light Artillery” who only have 1 for now, but seem like a team on the rise.
Paedo getting 7? I’ll bet a a lot of PSU fans will be lining up to hammer that spread.
I’ll go.
ND is -7.5 v. my wolven sort. That extra half-point is almost insulting, even if it is a public side.
Down with the Irish. The bttle of Powers whisky from last night nods.
So does the altar boy, wistfully.
spitting priest jism is a mortal sin ,, ppl forget that
Oh my.
“Hurricane Leftovers” sounds like Trump’s name for Don_T.
what a header assist by Big Rom, that’s United clear 2nd, then
My old bones ache
I know that feeling
Hey, who was that color analyst a couple weeks ago who I bitched at for saying a dislocated finger was more scary than painful?
Either way, fuck him again. Because I popped one out last night, popped it back in quick, and it still hurt like a bitch and still does and is a might bit discolored to boot. So fuck that guy.
HOT TAEK: Pain hurts.
/also pillz RULE
Pain don’t hurt.
Preach….
During the training this week, the head engineer for the port pulled me aside during a smoke break to ask me if I was okay because the guys noticed how badly I was moving around.
Its amazing to me when it gets this cold, every single injury you ever had just comes back at you.
Morning gents!
OF COURSE, Spurs v. Manure is a total stinker of a dud.
Oh God. Why did I eat those fajitas at 4am?
One way or another, I’ll need at least a moderate level of sedatives by 3:30.
28-6 Gator Bowl is still one of my favorite bowl memories, btw.
Too bad Amato spoils it. Good trivia question, NC State being 2-0 v. Notre Dame lifetime in footbaw, though.
I hope a meteor vaporizes Indiana and Ohio.
you don’t need the IN meteor, wolves will take care of it on the pitch. Just like last season.
Nope. Not good enough. The school needs to be purged from the Earth, and the rest of the fat humps can all die in a giant grease fire.