“Down With the Irish” Lesser Footy Open Thread

We shall get to the title sequence in a moment, suffice to say it represents a real statement moment for my wolven sort.

First, the morning Lesser Footy, kicked off with a monster matchup, Spurs invading Old Trafford (7:30, NBCSN).  #3 at #2, and all that separates them is goal differential, with each on 20 points.  Harry Kane v. Romelu Lukaku, easily the two best players in the League.  Yes, wake up for it.

West Brom’s hopeless home tie against Man City (NBCSN) highlights the 10:00 window.  Seriously, City’s goal differential is +28 after just 9 matches.  That’s UNLV in the early 90s material.  Liverpool and Huddersfield Town play on CNBC (hangover from winning at United?), with Arsenal v. Swans being the best of the paid/streaming fixtures.

Once again, the spotlight dance is forgettable, Chelsea/Bournemouth (12:30, NBC).  JV NFL is better.

Sunday’s doubleheader starts light, with 12th position Brighton & Hove hosting 10th place Southampton (9:30, NBCSN).  These sides are pretty boring.  Next, bigger names with shittier records, as 18th position (yikes) Everton visit 14th place Leicester, both boasting new managers – Everton’s being of the interim varietal (12:00, NBC).  Both sides should have the “new manager” burst of emotional energy, and each has more skill than they’ve shown in the early going.  Perhaps they will entertain us, until Red Zone kicks off.  Damn the British time zones shifting differently from ours.

Oklahoma State at West By God Virginia (Noon, ABC)

A tasty appetizer ahead of the loaded 3:30 window, give us all your Big 12-ish offensing, please.

Cal at Colorado (2:00, Pac12)

Super interesting for these sides to play so early in the day, and the pickins are slim early on.

NC State at Notre Dame (3:30, NBC)

Here we go!  The banner pic is from the game in Raleigh last year, played in Hurricane leftovers.  State dominated, as the foundations of this season’s team (good OL, great QB, dominant DL) were finally starting to come together, and the pitiful secondary was neutralized.  In my mind, this is still a matchup that heavily favours the wolven sort, with the chance to pick up the most important road win in perhaps the last 30-40 years of the program.  A victory surely takes NC State into the Top Ten itself for a home showdown with Clemson next weekend essentially for the division title.  No pressure, guys!

Paedo State at Ohio State (3:30, Fox)

Get.  Fucked.

Georgia at Florida (3:30, CBS)

The World’s Largest (Forgotten) Outdoor Cocktail Party, we shall see if the Gators can manage to be more than a speed bump on UGA’s road to Roll Damn Tide.

TCU at Iowa State (ABC/ESPN2)

This is a really interesting, and surprisingly important game.  Why not move it to tonight, when somebody might fucking be able to watch the thing?

Mississippi State at Texas A&M (7:15, ESPN)

Ah, the always entertaining SEC West undercard fixture.  This one could be pretty wild and back-and-forth.

Tennessee at Kentucky (7:30, SECN)

UK always manages to blow it against UT.  This seems almost served up on a silver platter for the Wildcats, so they will twist themselves in knots to fuck up.  FUN SHIT.

Washington State at Arizona (9:30, PAC12)

Everyone done forgot about BEAR DOWN Foar Midterms, but they’re 3-1 in the League.  Beat Wazzu at home, and you are looking at a title game contender.  Not ded yet, eh, Rich Rod?

USC at Arizona State (10:45, ESPN)

Fresh off a butthammering in South Bend, the Troi Boiz highlight the tweaker match in Coed Valhalla.  This always makes for interesting viewing, though I have no idea what you will get out of either football squadron.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Croooow

And my hope Baylor goes 0-12 stays alive.

scotchnaut

One of the first college games that stuck in my memory. I loved underdogs and West Virginny had lost to Penn State 18 times in a row.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DoJs-cDlew0

WCS

Welp.

theeWeeBabySeamus

@Hippo…. daU w/ 11pt cushion, U*NC punting away with 6 1/2 to play.

Fronkenshteen

Jesus, WSU/OSU o/u is 77.5!

WCS

I’m just glad that wasn’t picked.

theeWeeBabySeamus

tl;dr : He good

WCS

I am liking this.

laserguru

Since the Vikings game starts so goddamn early tomorrow I’m thinking of trying the old “Let’s start drinking really early, pass out early and wake up in time for a 6:30 AM game” tactic.

It’s never failed me before.

scotchnaut

Actually, you’ve got until 9:30.

/giggles

laserguru

This is mostly true since I’ll DVR the game anyway.

scotchnaut

Hippo, I hope you got a good look at the shoulders of the sideline reporter in the Miami game.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I always watch those assdicks when they suck.
I ain’t tempting fate.

Shogun Marcus

So starting anyone on the 500’s is probably not a good idea this week huh?

laserguru

The one bloody time I get to watch the Cherries on national TV and they get fucking blanked again.

We’re gonna get relegated I just fucking know it.

laserguru

But they’ve only scored like 2 fucking goals all season.
Maybe they get better at Newcastle next week.

Wakezilla

Guy has been standing in front of the line at Tim Hortons for at least 3 minutes. He gets called up and that stupid shit doesn’t know what to order, leading to a longer queue. Ultimately, after anout another minute, he orders a fucking coffee. I am legally allowed to kick him on the dick, right?

theeWeeBabySeamus

He’s not your Guy, Friend.

scotchnaut

Canada Day I was bartending and the crowd was at least six deep for at least 8 hours. Some guy gets to the front and yells, “Buddy! I’ve been waiting for a while now!” I served two others before I got to him and said, “What’ll it be?” He hemmed and hawed and said “I’m not sure. Honey, what do you want?” She didn’t know either.

I was a bit frazzled so my response was “Are you fucking kidding me?” [pointing to the guy right beside him] “You. What do you want?” He rattled off his order and I turned to the first dude and yelled “THAT’S how it’s done. Get it?”

/I’m a little worked up just typing this

Unsurprised

You did God’s work.

theeWeeBabySeamus

daU/U*NC color commentator (after daU return man brings the kickoff out and gets crushed): I think that was a bad decision to bring that ball out.

And he gets paid for this opinion.

herodotus450

Miami (FL) v unc just, got, interesting.

herodotus450

They are spending most of the game talking about brain ice packs and new jerseys

herodotus450

Do commentators not actually watch the game they are calling? That’s about the only explanation I can think of for the stunning idiocy of most of them.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Buffalo @ Akron is the best game available right now.

Plus you get to say “Zips” a lot.

Shogun Marcus

Scatman Crothers and David Lee Roth agree.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Checking in from my buddy’s bachelor party. The hangover has subsided enough such that I can pack everyone into the minivan and drive an hourish to Firestone Walker’s Barrel Works brewery. Since I have to drive back, I’m preparing to spend probably $60 on bottles. Liver’s morale is high at the thought of a break.

Redshirt
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“It was a gas leak, and we’re all fine,” coach Hue Jackson explained. “The real hero here is DeShone Kizer, who personally tried to find and stop the leak, but was overcome by the fumes, judging by the fact that we found him passed out with his head in the oven here.”

Redshirt

I started watching the Wisconsin game, but then I say Tuberville commenting. Seeing first hand how he pretty much destroyed UC and walked away, caused me to fill with a rage that permeated long after I changed the channel.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’d be pretty happy about Miami losing any other week, but not this one.
C’mon ‘Canes, you’ve got one jorb today. Don’t fuck it up.

Redshirt

All work and no play makes Redshirt a dull boy.

scotchnaut

How long has it been since you last saw a play?

/you just got dad-joked!

Redshirt

Nice one, Daddy Scotch. Actually, it was a year or two ago. I was dragged there by my family for my sister’s birthday present. It was “Anything Goes”.

If I do eventually snap, Criminal Investigators are going to call that my “start of darkness”.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Last one I saw was Rent. Gay stepson wanted to see it.
Neither of us liked it and I had “525,600 minutes” reverberating in my head for weeks.

herodotus450

Quack quack quack!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I don’t mind dull boys, they’re a lot easier to talk into getting in the van.”

Marc T., Toronto

scotchnaut

Maybe my slow-poke son can get all his shit together so I can drive him to the lake, drive back, watch the football and drink some sweet, sweet nectar.

Shogun Marcus

Unrelated to anything, but I’m pretty sure Lisa Loeb has not aged.

Fronkenshteen

Still plenty of time for West Ham to fuck this up.

Fronkenshteen

Yep. There it is. I feel so bad for Bílic. He seems like a genuinely good guy.

Wakezilla

I know they flopped in America because America can’t have nice things, but, damn it feels good to have Jay and Dan back in Canadia.I adequately enjoy stupid sketches like this. One caveat though: Kate Bierness’s finisher should be called Shattered Dreams because there’s no way she’s that perfect.

/Edit: Just remember she’s a Bears fan. Never mind.

http://www.tsn.ca/jay-and-dan/video/tsn-battle-rumble-onrait-vs-o-neill%7E1243779

Shogun Marcus

*squints* …nope it doesn’t look that way. Though my perspective could be slanted.

Wakezilla

Holy shit, it just hit me that there’s still 2 weeks left of the CFL regular season and it’s October 28th. The hell are they doing to take so long? It was only a few years ago, the season ended early November. This league isn’t popular enough to draw out the season. This cheerleader is going to die of pneumonia when the Grey Cup weekend ends up in Saskatchewan.

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scotchnaut

How the hell is she going to catch a football with those gloves?

/I’ll be in my bunk ‘out-kicking my coverage’

Wakezilla

“/I’ll be in my bunk ”

Funnily enough, that’s how her gloves’ stick’em is made.

Redshirt

Just be sure to have adequate protection by locking the door. You don’t want a free running gunner to “interfere with the opportunity to catch the kick” if you know what I’m saying.

scotchnaut

Erik Karlsson has only played 6 games and he’s already tenth among defensemen in scoring (which is only 3 points behind the leader). He’s coming for you, Alex Pietrangelo!

Wakezilla

Either his foot is going to completely heal and he’ll run away with the scoring race by February, or, he may have come back too soon and will be out for most of the year by December. I’m still not sure which way it’ll go

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I am so gassy

JustStopDude

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Wakezilla

Tell me about it. I downed 20 Timbits last night for the first time and ages and now my farts and this morning shit is sugary lethal. Minus the sugar.

Shogun Marcus

I will be at a wedding, held at a megachurch. A young coworker of my wife’s who has known this guy for a little over 6 months. He appears quite…fabulous. Did I mention they’re both virginal until-marriage types? I’m viewing this as a fascinating sociological and anthropological study.

herodotus450

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Unsurprised

There’s nothing in the Bible about pegging.

scotchnaut

I had a girl buddy from high school do the same thing. When I met up with her before the wedding I could practically hear her clock ticking-absolutely desperate to be ‘in the family way’.

scotchnaut

Notre Dame getting its ass kicked?

I’LL BE THERE!

scotchnaut

Real NFL-quality players eh? Interesting…”

-Giants GM Jerry Reese

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I can get onboard with rooting for NC State against Notre Dame. Hell I can get onboard rooting for Jabba the Hut against Notre Dame

JustStopDude

Never thought I would be rooting for Ohio State.

It is still simply baffling that Penn State can run a pedophile ring for over 10 fucking years and nothing except removing a fucking statue of the guy that let it happened was their only punishment.

herodotus450

Is the barren moonscape of Buffalo most similar to Russian Winters?

herodotus450

Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line, but never, NEVER engage in a land vehicle tailgate-based drinking war in Buffalo!

herodotus450

Looks like Chicago takes the cake with 4.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Notre_Dame_Fighting_Irish_football_series_records#Record_against_opponents
I would have guessed Oregon State, they just have 2.
And don’t sleep on “Indianapolis Light Artillery” who only have 1 for now, but seem like a team on the rise.

Fronkenshteen

Paedo getting 7? I’ll bet a a lot of PSU fans will be lining up to hammer that spread.

I’ll go.

litre_cola

Down with the Irish. The bttle of Powers whisky from last night nods.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So does the altar boy, wistfully.

scotchnaut

Oh my.

blaxabbath

“Hurricane Leftovers” sounds like Trump’s name for Don_T.

herodotus450

My old bones ache

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey, who was that color analyst a couple weeks ago who I bitched at for saying a dislocated finger was more scary than painful?

Either way, fuck him again. Because I popped one out last night, popped it back in quick, and it still hurt like a bitch and still does and is a might bit discolored to boot. So fuck that guy.

Brick Meathook

Pain don’t hurt.
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JustStopDude

Preach….

During the training this week, the head engineer for the port pulled me aside during a smoke break to ask me if I was okay because the guys noticed how badly I was moving around.

Its amazing to me when it gets this cold, every single injury you ever had just comes back at you.

Fronkenshteen

Morning gents!

Unsurprised

Oh God. Why did I eat those fajitas at 4am?

theeWeeBabySeamus

One way or another, I’ll need at least a moderate level of sedatives by 3:30.

theeWeeBabySeamus

28-6 Gator Bowl is still one of my favorite bowl memories, btw.

Unsurprised

I hope a meteor vaporizes Indiana and Ohio.

Unsurprised

Nope. Not good enough. The school needs to be purged from the Earth, and the rest of the fat humps can all die in a giant grease fire.

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