Sexy Friday, Mid to Late August 2021 edition

As I mentioned last week, I’m switching things around. HOWEVAH, before I do that, I need to catch up on the pics that you all have posted.

Therefore, today’s Sexy Friday features 25 (not 11) pics that you have posted in the last few weeks.

On to Balls’ Thoughts O’ Da Week!

***

Balls’ Book Corner

I’m not as avid a reader as many of you are. Honestly, I don’t have the time. However, I like to pick up a new book from time to time that you all have recommended to see if it strikes my fancy.

Recently, King Hippo posted about the “Fractured Europe” series by Dave Hutchinson. It’s a series set in a not-so distant future where a global pandemic from China (talk about great timing!) has ravaged the world, nationalism and regionalism have taken over, and the European Union and indeed entire countries have been broken up into many tiny states or “polities” as they are described in the books.

I saw that the first book, “Europe in Autumn”, was on sale in paperback on Amazon for $12 so I decided, fuck it, let’s see how it is.

I read it in two days. And that was only because the fucker is 425 pages long and I had other shit to do. If I had started in the morning, I might have finished it in one day.

Hutchinson does a great job of world-building, using the present (the book was written in 2017) and the past to frame a future that makes sense if the dominoes fall a certain way. There are major sci-fi elements to the story but it’s grounded enough in a plausible reality that you don’t necessarily find yourself going, “Oh fuck you!”

The writing keeps you on your toes as Hutchinson does not follow a traditional story-telling technique. There are flashbacks and when one chapter ends and you think the next chapter will follow the action, it ends up going in a completely different direction. However, the threads are well-tied together so you are able to follow what is happening.

The thing that I enjoyed most about the book is that it is accessible and challenging at the same time. You have to keep track of characters and actions but you get the satisfaction of seeing how they all fit in the more you read. There is a little bit of suspension of disbelief that you need to have (due to the sci-fi element) but I think it’s a credit to the writer that it doesn’t seem that far-fetched. He knows human nature well and all the characters’ reactions and motivations are perfectly rational.

Perhaps the best thing I liked about the book is that Hutchinson doesn’t reveal everything. It’s very similar to real life in that we never truly know the whole story of anything. We piece together what we can out of the information we are given and then react to it. He allows the reader to fill in the blanks and ride along with the protagonist in figuring out exactly what the hell is going on with him.

The ending shocked me because it’s not really an ending, more of a beginning. Hutchinson clearly meant this to be a series from the start. In fact, the paperback I bought has a couple of chapters of the next book in the series in it.

The next book is “Europe at Midnight” and I will be buying it from Amazon for $12 on paperback, which I guess is the highest form of praise I can give this book.

If you like sci-fi deeply grounded in reality and a read that flies by while at the same time making you use your brain, this is the book for you. I’ll let you know how the next one goes when I finish it…

***

Recommended Viewing

For those of you that read our English Premier League preview and were wondering, like me, what the hell a Crystal Palace is, watch the video below:

Joolz is another great Youtuber that I like. His videos are informative and interesting and he takes you places you might otherwise not go to.

The Crystal Palace video is a great example as I’ve been to London many times and never thought about going to Crystal Palace or seeing that area. Having seen the video makes me interested in, if I’m lucky enough to go back, checking it out for myself.

I highly recommend a subscription to his YouTube channel if you do that sort of thing. He’s great!

***

La Liga Update

For some anglo-centric and biased reason (certainly not food-based!), the DFOers love themselves some English Premier League. I, contrarian that I am, am much more interested in La Liga, Spain’s top league. Yes, I have my own biases on this, but this was the league of Messi and Ronaldo and some of the best teams of the last two decades.

Well, Messi is now in Paris, Ronaldo is still in Turin, and the humongous amount of money that ESPN paid to get the US rights to La Liga away from BeIn Sports and to ESPN+ seems to have been wasted.

HOWEVAH, I beg to differ. La Liga started last weekend, just like the EPL, and I watched several of the games. Here are some notes:

  • Barcelona will be just fine without Messi. Heck, they may actually be better.
  • Real Madrid is still Real Madrid. Bale and Hazard are now the backbone of the team, as weird as that may sound.
  • Atlético Madrid look good to defend their championship.
  • There were a lot of red cards given out. Valencia-Getafe and Celta-Atlético both ended 10 against 10. Rayo Vallecano and Villarreal also ended up with 10 against Sevilla and Granada, respectively.
  • Everyone else is pretty even and any team can beat any other team on any given week.

Now, I ask you, doesn’t that an exciting league make? La LIga is shown on ESPN+ in the States and on BeIn Sports in Canada. Over the course of the season, I’ll provide updates and let you know of any matches that would be good for you to watch.

This weekend’s Match To Watch is Barcelona visiting Athletic Bilbao at 1:00 PM Pacific on Saturday. Barcelona traditionally struggles at the San Mamés, so it will be a close and exciting match. As I’ve mentioned before, San Mamés is an absolutely gorgeous stadium and y’all should go to a game there if you have the opportunity.

***

For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.

Here are your pictures of the week.

h/t
h/t Brocky
h/t RTD
h/t RTD (72421)
h/t RTD
h/t Litre_cola
h/t Don T
h/t Brick
h/t Mr. Ayo (Balls’ Pic O’ Da week!)
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Horatio
h/t WCS
h/t Horatio
h/t Brocky
h/t Horatio
h/t Anthony in TX
h/t Anthony in TX
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Anthony in TX
h/t Anthony in TX
h/t Brocky
h/t Brocky
h/t Brocky
h/t Anthony in TX
h/t

***

YOU’RE-A-PRUDE

***

And now, for the music!

As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

Today we are back to the puzzles! As always, I will give up to three hints in the comments at your request. You try to determine the hidden theme or link between all the songs. Good luck!

Song Number One:

POOLCLVB – Space

Canción Número Dos:

FISHER – Losing it

Chanson Numéro Trois:

FISHER – Just Feels Tight

Canzone numero quattro:

SCNDL – The Munsta

Canção número cinco

DJ Tigerlily – Ashes

Seigarren zenbakia:

NERVO – You’re Gonna Love Again

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and fly low and avoid the radar.

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Popped by a Longmont brewery called 300 Suns, mixed bag. The yuzu gose was not great, the blue corn cream ale is decent, and I’m hoping the imperial toffee brown is better.

Because otherwise it’s scotch time.

yeah right

So free, single and beer-less in Denver on Tuesday August 31st.

If you know a body.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And when will you be in Boulder?

yeah right

Checks abacus…

FelonySqwrrl

Left Hand Brewery has the best local beer in my opinion.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Incorrect but not a terrible answer

yeah right

Book wise, Dok recommended “The Bad Muslim Discount” by Syed M. Masood and it’s wonderful.

The author does incredible characters and it’s an insight to an unfamiliar culture that is warm, approachable and deeply empathic that helps the reader truly understand the struggle of even wanting to be Muslim in America.

Great stuff.

Full recomendation.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Beer me

Horatio Cornblower

comment image

yeah right

Will accept!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So jelly

Mr. Ayo

I’ve only got this reserve bottle of freezer vodka.

You’re welcome.

Horatio Cornblower

I was trying to find out who the nude skier was for…reasons, and I stumbled, (seriously, I am not trying to make a pun here), on this double amputee paraolympian.
comment image

Goddamn.

yeah right

I am now fully outfitted with new cargo shorts and disposable poncho liners.

Fuck it. I’m going to Denver.

No. I’m going to Red Rocks.

I bought these tickets 2 years ago.

I’ll be fully masked up and am already fully vaxxed.

Let’s see the Black Crowes for the third or fourth time, I forget these things.
comment image

Let’s go to Red Rocks.

yeah right

Two years ago who among us ever put a single thought to the phrase “Crippling anxiety?”

Today, who among us hasn’t.

My last great memory from the “Before Time” was seeing David Byrne play at Red Rocks.

https://doorfliesopen.com/2018/10/02/boots-on-the-ground-things-to-do-in-denver-when-youre-drunk-pt-2-red-rocks/

I’m gonna get my mind right, Boss.

I’m gonna get my mind right..

Viva La Tabula Raza

Was that the American Utopia thing? I saw that show three times when he toured it, back in the Before Times. Can’t even remember if that was ’18 or ’19…

yeah right

It was! The acoustics were incredible!

Brick Meathook

Here’s another submarine story. I hope these don’t bore you.

This is the Deep Submergence story.

Ordinarily we would cruise at 400 feet. That was our “sweet spot.” No matter how bad the weather and the seas were upstairs, we didn’t feel a thing. Surface ships are getting the shit kicked out of them; we are down below drinking coffee and watching movies.

However, we always had to be able to listen to radio messages. We didn’t broadcast (radio silence) but we always had to hear, and this was a big deal. If our main listening device malfunctioned (which was seemingly always) we had to cruise at 150 feet to use our “floating wire.”

Sometimes we would go deep, and I don’t know why but I can tell you that I hated it. If we got down to 700 feet the only word I can use to describe it is “spooky.” Back in engineering we had four seawater cooling systems and they were going nuts due to the extreme seawater pressure. There were weird noises everywhere. It was like we were on the edge of death.

Please please please let’s go back up to 150 feet.

Doktor Zymm

As a recreational diver who has never gone past 110 feet or so, I am just familiar enough with the effects of pressure to be incredibly freaked out by the idea of being at 700 ft.

Brick Meathook

We were required to be handsome.

SonOfSpam

Damn, must’ve been rough when you got demoted to Marines.

Doktor Zymm

I assume not, because if something does happen at 700 feet you are almost certainly fucked no matter what training you have. Even at 400, you would need specialized equipment and the time to get into it, along with the training. Much easier to just build subs that can handle those depths.

Doktor Zymm

At a minimum, you would probably need a LOT of helium tanks sitting around, and that would take up space that doesn’t exist

Brick Meathook

You are confusing a nuclear submarine with scuba diving.

Doktor Zymm

I’m thinking of trying to dive out of a sub that had some sort of critical failure at depth. As far as I know that has never happened

Brick Meathook

There’s no escape. The beauty of submarines is that everyone gets killed instantly and simultaneously. However, we were in the killing business. We were not in the “getting killed” business.

Brick Meathook

We were rated for 1350 feet, but we never went there on my six patrols, and I’m glad we didn’t.

Doktor Zymm

I understand that people do underwater dry welding up to 1300 ft, which is crazy to me.

Doktor Zymm

I enjoy the podcast “Hidden Brain” but I kind of wish there was another podcast called “Hidden Brian” about obscure and not so obscure people named Brian through the ages

Anthony In TX

Looks like it’s time to launch a podcast

Doktor Zymm

In slightly less horrible news, today I learned that Princess Diana once pushed her elderly stepmother down a flight of stairs

scotchnaut

Just once? Between that and her charity work she’s an even better person than I had previously thought.

Doktor Zymm

Wait, do most people push old women down stairs a bunch of times?

scotchnaut

Random old women? Perish the thought. Stepmothers? Absolutely.

blaxabbath

This Last Night in Montreal is excellent. Thank you, Hippo.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Dr. Mrs. is watching the CW version of Kung Fu. It’s aggressively bad.

Anthony In TX

Is that better or worse than watching the Jaden Smith version of Karate Kid where Jackie Chan teaches him… kung fu?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I presume it’s approximately equal.

Doktor Zymm

There was a roundtable discussion about Afghanistan on the radio, and they found a really horrible woman to be on the panel. She was 10 when 9/11 happened and somehow came to the conclusion that it was a couple guys with laptops who independently executed the whole thing, Afghanistan had no link whatsoever, and they clearly didn’t like Democracy that much anyway, because if they really cared about it they would have martyred themselves and potentially their whole families in some sort of idealistic last stand instead of going home when the Taliban was advancing. And I think she’s supposed to be the far-left voice. She did at least say she didn’t think we should genocide Muslims, so good for her I guess?

Redshirt

Still a better take on Afghanistan than Biden has.

Doktor Zymm

That we don’t have any moral responsibility and should just leave all the Afghans who worked with us to be killed because they don’t like us enough? I dunno, I think I prefer the poorly executed airlift idea

Doktor Zymm

I agree with most of that, although we never really invested in state building in Afghanistan and it seems we did expect the government to collapse, just not so quickly. If we didn’t expect them to stand on their own two feet, then why not try to evacuate a significant portion of people ahead of time?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Too much wine for a serious discussion of this right now, so I’m going to pull some cowardly shit where I post an opinion and then go to bed, [Stephen A. Smith voice]…BUT…evacuting people and the government collapsing went hand and hand. Jake Tapper has been beating the drum for evacuating translators for a good solid month. When it finally started happening, the collapse of the government happened *very* quickly thereafter. The two are intimately connected. Once the first started happening, the second was inevitable.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And not just inevitable – *immediately* inevitable. It’s like pulling a load-bearing leg out of a jenga tower – once it’s out, the other pieces are coming down in a tumble of chaos and there’s no amount of planning or yelling or firing guns you can do that will make them go down calmly and orderly.

scotchnaut

I don’t downvote hardly ever but this is such a dismissive, snarky, youtube comment-informed hot teak-I had no choice.

Doktor Zymm

Found her twitter, she’s from Arlington, Texas and describes herself as “Christian. Mother. Avid partisan of humankind.”
Lol

blaxabbath

This tabloid media nonsense is what they report as analysis.

Doktor Zymm

Well, she’s solely an opinion writer, and its just a discussion show, so at least in this case it wasn’t presented as anything like analysis

blaxabbath

I hate when I’m right but wrong.

Doktor Zymm

Well, since she is so awful, she probably thinks she is doing analysis, so close enough

Redshirt

These Washington Reserves are going for the knees so much, Tonya Harding is starting to get a little turned on.

SonOfSpam

Sydney vs Gold Coast on FS2 in 40 minutes

Redshirt

You know a team has been weak at kicker for a while when social media is freaking out over a 50 yard field goal that splits the uprights.

Beerguyrob
Redshirt

4th String QB Alert!

scotchnaut

This Patterson rb playing on Team looks to be a viable handcuff to Gibson. I’m writing off McKissic because Fitz is not a dumpoff pass guy.

Redshirt

I see the Bengals Defensive Secondary is in midseason form.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is my refrigerator running? No, no it is not.

Anthony In TX

Apparently something called a “CM Punk” is back.

I don’t watch wrestling.

Redshirt

Uh… in football terms, this is like Joe Montana being traded to Kansas City.

Anthony In TX

Ah, gotcha.

SonOfSpam

The CM stands for Cock Magnet.

That’s the extent of my wrestling knowledge.

Anthony In TX

Hey, that’s more than I know. My wrestling knowledge ended around the time of the Ultimate Warrior and Hulkamania.

SonOfSpam

The only ultimate Warrior I know is

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47y5bo8wtqM

scotchnaut

One thing about 80’s videos was that creative minds were given almost complete free reign with relatively little corporate interference. For every Take On Me, Thriller, Sledgehammer, Don’t Come Around Here No More, Land of Confusion and Once In A Lifetime there were dozens and dozens of videos like the above. Here’s another one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sV7w5TaYjRA&ab_channel=KateBushMusic

Anthony In TX

This is definitely un-sexy:
https://twitter.com/JoshMandelOhio/status/1428784031638949899
I’m sure the patrons would LOVE to find out they were served by a sick waitress…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Could this qualify as slander due to the damage it’s going to do to their business? Assuming they are willing to lie and say that she wasn’t sick and he made the whole thing up.

Anthony In TX

Probably depends on the findings of the Wood County Health Board. I feel quite certain that place will get a visit in the next 24-36 hours.

scotchnaut

Ironic, given that after the civil suits are settled you could buy the business for five cents on the dollar.

blaxabbath

I thought we hated the NFL though?

Anthony In TX

They’re both white players.

Take from that what you will.

Horatio Cornblower

Josh Mandel is a fucking idiot.

Brocky

REDSHIRT YOU WATCHING THIS?

Redshirt

CM Punk? Yes. I’m happy for him.

Beerguyrob
SonOfSpam

Music guess – these are all songs voted Music That Will Most Likely Make You Experiment With The Same Sex At A Foam Party In Ibiza?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Unless they make the playoffs, I guess this is the only time I will see the Bengals on national TV this season.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
blaxabbath

People are big on Burrows.

Can’t say I remember the last guy who missed most of his first season with an improving team and came back to kick ass though.

rockingdog

Found a funny;

[texting family]

me: we live in a cruel world. i welcome the sweet release of death

me, twenty minutes later when my stomach feels better: disregard that last text

Anthony In TX

There’s a little spot in rural Michigan that began wishing for the sweet release of death right around the time I stopped.

Redshirt

Halftime. Time to see if Joe Burrow is so desperate to play that he jumps the 3rd String QB and steals his uniform at Halftime.

scotchnaut

re: TD review-Is an elbow the same as a knee?

Mr. Ayo

Depends on if it’s your team.

herodotus450

Bungles’ lineup always seems to resemble a college football playoff game from 2-4 years ago

Redshirt

You misspelled “cupcake game squad”.

scotchnaut

I heard Cupcake Squad got even worse reviews than it’s Suicide cousin. The FNU* is absolute trash, imo.

*Food Network Universe

Sharkbait

I remember when the Food Network showed actual cooking shows, and not various competitions/reality shows. That format needs to come back

scotchnaut

I remember when the History Channel wasn’t floating out ‘documentaries’ about Hitler fleeing to Argentina in a submarine.

What I’m trying to say is that I’m old.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I remember when the History Channel was called the Shit’s Happening Right Now Channel. I too am old.

scotchnaut

There was a sister channel in Germany?

Redshirt

Aw, hell. That ball hit the ground. Where’s an MLB Umpire when I need him?!

scotchnaut

Mecoledown!

Redshirt

(talking with friends)

Friend #1: “When do you think CM Punk will debut tonight?”
Friend #2: “The real question is will Bryan Danielson debut the same night? What do you think, Redshirt?”

Me: “I’m just wondering how long the Bengals will have Brandon Allen play with the #1s tonight.”

scotchnaut

It’s my first delicious alcohol drink in 15 (nobody’s counting!) days. And just when my liver was starting to talk to me again…

Sharkbait

Gotta keep it in line.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I went to take a leak last night and my liver was already in the bathroom, puking in the toilet…

scotchnaut

It’s a long way down scrambling-wise from Kyler to Colt McCoy.

King Hippo

This is a hard watch, even with Theeeeesman muted

scotchnaut

Think of it as an early morning London tilt. #mandatory

BrettFavresColonoscopy

COVID test came back negative, woot woot

Sharkbait

Better have a drink to be sure. Alcohol does kill germs after all…

blaxabbath

Cud is a hoax.

Gumbygirl

Throw it to Gawking-Ganderballs again, Grandpa!

Anthony In TX

Yay! Sexy Friday!
Give me Amy Pond/Nebula or give me death
comment image

King Hippo

good golly, that’s some nice shoulders

scotchnaut

Hey there’s a Scotch/Hippo Derby first game of the season. Neither team can afford that 0-1 start out of the gate.

King Hippo

I finally paid off my #ShameBet with DonT, so I am open to the concept again.

scotchnaut

How long exactly did you have to wear underwear on your head during Zoom calls? I can’t remember.

Sharkbait

Hippo right now:
comment image

scotchnaut

Jamarr Chase is smart or has alligator arms. Pick one.

King Hippo

Sure, I’ll pick one. The camera won’t notice! – Chase Y., Landover, MD

King Hippo

Alligatored a 2nd. Good thing WKRP passed on that generational left tackle to snap him up!

Redshirt

The Scounting Department Guy, All the Coaches, the Homeless Guy Who Lives on the Concourse, JaMarr Chase may have liked New Age Anthony Munoz. But Joe Burrow wanted his friend. Or Chase is the same blood type as he is.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I have not been paying that much attention, have they shown how many folks are in the stands?

scotchnaut

Mahomes only has eyes for a Hardman.

Gumbygirl

Christ, that’s Theisman, isn’t it?

Viva La Tabula Raza

OH SNAP! IT IS!

King Hippo

But enough about Joe’s tibia!

Viva La Tabula Raza

WAY TO RUIN MY JOKE!

King Hippo

is tonite’s theme, yo!

King Hippo

Speaking of awkward boners…when Chase Young makes Joe Burrow ded (in about 80 seconds) – will Redshirt’s tOSU penis get hard before his Team WKRP heart breaks?

King Hippo

WAY TO RUIN MY JOKE, fuckadoos holding out Joe Burrow tonight.

scotchnaut

Me first comment was going to be about it being patently unfair for Team’s starting D to play against Brandon Allen.

King Hippo

just fielding 11 defenders is unfair to that dude