Hello there fellow DFO’er.  Hope you’re well today.  And thanks for coming back to see last weeks comments of the week as decided by my brain.  There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t.  

This is now a year (52 posts) of me doing the comments of the week posts, the original COTW post (loves ya Sharky).  The idea behind me doing these posts was for me to help out balls and to free him up to write other things but after a few months, I forgot that I was just the understudy and just kept doing them.  And since balls hasn’t asked for these posts back and hasn’t complained anywhere that I’m able to see, I’ll keep doing them.  And honestly, I read all the comments anyways, and feel like I should contribute to the #content for the site, this feels like a good fit for me.  I’ve got a good system for doing these now but have thought about writing some code to format the comments for the post into a WordPress(tm) format.  Someday.  
So, thanks for sticking with this for a year.  You’re all my favoUrite.  I cannot imagine what I would be doing without all you around this past few years.  Y’all bring the funny and weird and troof and friendship that makes me feel so very comfortable here.  I can just read the comments or I can (randomly) comment and no one cares either way.  So, thanks for being you.

Also, there was a recommendation* from a few folks to play Timberborn on Steam.  I’ve managed to get a Steam account and even got logged in.  So my next question is that can Timberborn be played on a tablet?  I see specs for Windows and IOS, but nothing about Android or tablet and cannot tell from the write ups that I’ve seen on Stream.  If no one know, then I’ll do some more research, aka RTFM ( Read the fucking manual).  I’m trying not to log back into the laptop after hours as I’ll end up working and don’t want to do that.

*love that there’s recommendations of all sorts from y’all.

And for the snow update this week, we just got a bit of snow, so like a 1 slicer.  But was talking to my manager, who lives in Fort Worth TX and how on Tuesday night the LEAD news story down there was there might, MIGHT, be snow on Thursday.  So, there were already closings and panic buying at the grocery store and other stupid things on Wednesday.  The snow there was not expected to stay or accumulate at all.  I asked on Thursday how much snow they got, and they got nary a flake.  We got a few inches but it wasn’t enough to need to shovel or to need to do much to clear the car. Which is my kind of snow. Just showed me how perspective matters.

As a reminder, this post will cover comments made up to and through the Saturday Night Open Thread. Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post. Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts. Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.    

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Some positive news for those who were unsatisfied by yesterday’s results: the James Webb Space Telescope has completed its final burn and has arrived at its destination! It’s going to be another six months before we see any images (lots of cooling and calibration still to do) but today is a very happy day for anyone who care about this stuff.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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I may have to listen to Pat McAfee’s podcast tomorrow to see who/which combination of folks Qaaron throws under the bus.
scotchnaut

Just don’t make fun of him. He doesn’t like to be needled.

(stolen, nawt my joke)
SonOfSpam

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I’d like to see the Rams take it all. Rewarding Fatthew for his years in the wilderness.
2Pack

He’ll hug the Lombardi like it were a bucket of custard.
Don T

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It’s weekends like this one that remind me why I will never be able to quit this objectively dumbass league and sport.
The Maestro

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Not information any you necessarily need . . . still, good to know I suppose

Downfield Matriculator

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Things I have done today to procrastinate the work I absolutely need to do today:

–Interview prospective college students for my alma mater and complete evaluations that aren’t due for a month
–Clean three toilets
–Laundry
–Lie down doing nothing for a while
–Crossword puzzles
BrettFavresColonoscopy

WCS

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1) The colts were right. Fuck Teddy Bruschi

2) Both teams deserve to touch the ball in OT.

3) I picked SF +3 and Cincy +6 before the lines came out.

4) Peter Doocy IS a stupid son of a bitch.

5) Self hatred is the broccoli of emotions.

6) Just getting around to watching “The Wire”. Pretty good!
Fronkenshteen

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Sharkbait

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Here’s my counter-argument to all those whining that Buffalo lost without getting the ball: (ahem) ITS CALLED DEFENSE, YOU WHINING ASSHOLES! ALL THEY HAD TO DO WAS KEEP THEM OUT OF THE ENDZONE AND THEY’D GET THE BALL!
Redshirt

I don’t recall Redshirt being this high and mighty when the Bengals were perpetually mired in last place in their division and couldn’t win a game to save their lives. You’ve changed man…
scotchnaut

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“Let’s check in on Game Time Decision as he clears the snow from his driveway.”

Gumbygirl

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Finally at my hotel.

Doors that only open when you turn the handle UP should be outlawed.
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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We got fantastic news today, the house in Desert Hot Springs appraised at full loan value, so we don’t have to go way out of pocket. All the paperwork is done, we went and signed a bunch of stuff in Palm Springs today. We came home through Yucca Valley and the desert to catch 18. Sunset and Joshua trees, it was really nice!
Gumbygirl

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Found a funny;

me: i want to play runescape

computer: listen closely. there is a man named mark zuckerberg. today he is only a child, but one day he will create the website that sows the seeds of mankind’s destruction. you must find him and stop him at all costs

me: haha silly beeps 🙂
rockingdog

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The mask requirement at work has been stepped up to at least KN95 masks. Since they are a bit more restrictive and you really need to be at peace to remain comfortable in them there’s been the side effect of people talking less to each other which kind of sucks.

Plus everyone looks like a plague doctor.
yeah right

I prefer the N95 to the KN, the ear loops are not my friend
Doktor Zymm

Plus all that added potassium is very flammable.
herodotus450

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Doktor Zymm

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What do you think platypus eggs taste like?

Doktor Zymm

Plant-based chicken
Don T

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Redshirt

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Found a funny;
[first day as a baker]

boss: open this door. you better not be making sculptures again

me: ahh [frantically trying to hide bread pitt and angelina doughlie] just a second
rockingdog

“The first rule of Gluten Club? Don’t talk about Gluten Club.”

-Bread Pitt
scotchnaut

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Ever get home, take your shoes and socks off, and then, ask yourself, “What stinks so much?” Then you look down and think, “Oh, Lord, I am so, so sorry.”

My socks could be weaponized, but would then be considered a war crime.

WCS

And this is how Luxembourg became a nuclear power.
ballsofsteelandfury

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Maybe this was discussed in an earlier thread, but: Jeff Garcia doing the “you didn’t play the game” thing at Mina Kimes because she said that Garrapolo didn’t play well against GB? Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, I bet you have to have laced on the cleats to appreciate the subtle genius of that 11/19, 131 YD, 0 TD, 1 INT line.
Dunstan

They have that in common, I don’t recall him playing the game either.
Gumbygirl

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“Visit The Honduras-The odds of you being murdered while on vacation here have dropped by 26.4%! We’re not like those savages in The Barbados!”

-The Honduras Tourism Association
scotchnaut

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My cable tv had been behaving weirdly since like November, and after trying all the obvious things I gave up because dealing with cable companies is annoying and I don’t watch much live tv and the DVR was still working so I could watch live sports on a short delay.

Last week there was a service outage in my neighborhood, and when it ended, my cable was working again.

What I’m saying is, my lifelong strategy of “just ignore a problem and hope it goes away” has finally worked. I will now keep doing this for the rest of my life.
Dunstan

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Redshirt

It could be worse. He could be cleaning up the holodeck. Especially after Riker or Barclay has been using it.
Dunstan

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https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cincyjungle.com/platform/amp/2022/1/14/22883546/adam-pacman-jones-upgrading-from-andy-dalton-to-joe-burrow-is-why-these-bengals-are-different

He’s not wrong, but Adam Jones blaming Andy Dalton is like Adam and Eve blaming the Serpent for the Fall of Man. They’re right, but their fingerprints are all over this thing.
Redshirt

obligatory

SonOfSpam

“Woo, I’m Pac Man!” – King Hippo, after arriving home from the pharmacy
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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The US has broken through against El Salvador, and this time they’ve done it without even having to fund right-wing death squads.
Horatio Cornblower

“Just because we don’t have to doesn’t mean we can’t though, right?” — CIA
Dunstan

(pops up)

-R. Reagan’s desiccated dong
SonOfSpam

[winks]
-Nancy
scotchnaut

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If I never see the Rapist’s fugly face again, my life will be better for it. Good riddance, you fucking creep.
Gumbygirl

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Found a funny;

[jesus dying on the cross] please… make a tv show where vegetables talk about me
rockingdog

/related

[Caesar bleeding out] “Mix together some vodka and clam juice, add some hot sauce, salt, perhaps a little Worchestershire? [takes deep gasp] Maybe rim the glass? Add a stick of celery. Use that to swirl the drink because everything tends to fall to the bottom. Could you do that for me?
scotchnaut

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Go with The Plow King. Mr. Plow is a loser, and I think he is a boozer. [ for the Nor’Easter last week]
SonOfSpam

WCS

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It’s been a long and frantic ten days, but today my wife and I, with an assist from a couple of friends and neighbors, finished rehoming the pets that my wife’s friend left behind when she died. And by that I mean I’m simply not telling my Mom that that sheepdog I dropped off last Wednesday is never leaving.

I am emotionally, mentally and physically exhausted, so it’s time to have exactly* one beer and got to bed at a reasonable hour.**

People, if you’re in your 60’s, please do not buy parrots. They can live 50-70 years, and you can’t.

*ish

**stare at the TV until 2 am before wandering off
Horatio Cornblower

You did a good thing. Hope the Mrs. is feeling better.
ballsofsteelandfury

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/A thing I did wrong today at work

Employee: [excited] “Are you going to greet the Freedom Convoy when it runs through town later today?”

Me: “I stopped waving at big trucks when I was about 8 years-old.”
scotchnaut

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My word! We have made it to the quarterfinals of the AFCON! There is so much to be discussed! Do put on your reading glasses once again!

The Divine Nation of GAMBLOR vs. The Indomitable LioUNs: This is perhaps the worst case scenario for the home side, as they are not only up against oddsmakers, but also GAMBLOR himself! There is almost no doubt that this contest will go to penalties (it is presently 0-0 at halftime) — I know who I will be putting my shillings on once we get there!

Squad of Dishonest Men vs. Tatooine: Though the sand people have demonstrated their incredible resolve throughout the tournament, I predict that the Burkinabe barbarians will roll through their ranks like Erwin Rommel’s tanks during the Siege of Tobruk. This one figures to be a bloody contest with lots of cards.

Sultanate of Egypt vs. Atlas LioUns: I am extremely confident that our fine British forces from Cairo will advance deep into Moroccan territory at least once today. The question is — will they be able to land the blow that is required to advance to the next round? They will need to do whatever they can to keep the LioUns at bay for 90 minutes — fortunately, rumour has it that there is no better lion tamer in all of Egypt than Mo Salah.

French Senegal vs. Equatorial (Equitable?) Guinea: This should be a cakewalk for the merchants of Dakar, but if the Equitable Guineans stall out the Senagalese with a 90 minute long keynote lecture on Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion, then this match will be a coin flip conducted from the penalty spot. The Senegalese players should keep their ear plugs in so that they can stay focused on the task at hand.

My colleagues at Royal Dutch Shell just struck oil off of the coast of South West Africa this week. I hope they don’t forget that they will need to go through Walvis Bay (a Cape Colony possession) before they ship it to market!
Cecil Rhodes

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Just tucked in trying to survive a howling blizzard, where we could get snowfall totals of as much as 7″-18″.

Not to get all “get off my lawn” here, but when I was a kid this storm would warrant a school cancellation, and not breathless 24 hours news coverage on every local station. Although the hysteria on display is oddly hypnotic, and likely drives ratings through the roof.
Horatio Cornblower

WCVB up here was doing a 5 person box last night during the 11pm newscast. A little overboard
Sharkbait

“5 person box? Pfft!”
-Houston
Horatio Cornblower

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I can’t read Hippo at 3:30 in the morning. Maybe after 3 hours of sleep it will make more sense to me.
TheRevanchist

Narrator: It would NOT make more sense later.
King Hippo

The Hippo text messages read my by car are the BEST. 0 clue what the computer lady is talking about.
litre_cola

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WCS

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Legit.

Doktor Zymm

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Found a funny;

centaur: I broke my arm

doctor: it’s okay I can fix it

centaur: I broke my leg too

doctor: cocks rifle
rockingdog

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Me: What the hell are you doing?

Wife: Smoking a bong and blowing the smoke up the chimney.

Me: That’s what I thought, but I had to ask.
Horatio Cornblower

You married a good woman
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I very clearly outkicked my coverage.
Horatio Cornblower

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Mississippi’s new anti-CRT bill forbids teaching specified tenants. The landlords are at it again!! shakes fist

Doktor Zymm

So it’s true, that no good obummer really did institute shania law smhgh
herodotus450

I thought it was Shakira law

Doktor Zymm

Thine hips shall not bear false witness against thoust neighbor
herodotus450

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First pass through with the snowblower. About 18″ in MA

Sharkbait

Snap, that’s like FOUR AND A HALF Favres!
King Hippo

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Thanks for all you’ve done this season Boris; you’re probably my favorite non-vodka Russian.
SonOfSpam

You forgot to add “Don’t tell the others”.

-Groznygirl
scotchnaut

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Twelve hours from now, the NFL Network will be talking about Tom Brady’s career while on the bottom of the screen:

AFC Championship Game Update: Entering Septuple Overtime tied at 73-73, after ejections due to a fight in the 4th Overtime that results in the on-field arrests of QBs Patrick Mahomes and Joe Bur-

NFL NETWORK BREAKING NEWS: Tom Brady eats hamburger for the first time since high school. Stay tuned while experts say what this means for his retirement decision.
Redshirt

This is a safe space, so I can tell you guys my darkest secrets, right? Ok [deep breath] here goes: I want to tie Tom Brady up and force feed him Carl’s Jr. Monster thickburgers. And then strawberries. Ooh baybee! Be right back, I have to- erm… Be right back!
Gumbygirl

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I’m doing a job remotely in New Brunswick Canada. I think it was thursday or friday, we had to stop for the day because the local temp got below -50C.

I can’t make my brain comprehend that temperature.
JustStopDude

[is remided of the time he fulfilled a dare to consume two Slurpees in two minutes] – Eli Manning
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.

Stay busy and safe out there.

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