Greetings, imaginary and non-imaginary friends alike! Lady BFC and I have ceased our nomadic lifestyle and have finally landed in a new home. That’s all very exciting, yes yes, but let’s focus on the important thing–I can FINALLY stock my bar. My neglected, nearly drained, and yet still-beloved-despite-largely-being-abstract-for-nigh-a-year bar.
For the last 10 months, we have been shuttling between furnished rentals in different cities with our stuff in storage and/or scattered amongst friends’ houses, which has done significant collateral damage to my liquor cabinet. A moratorium was (begrudgingly deemed as rational and accepted as) declared on the purchase of new booze so that we weren’t accumulating more bottles to haul from apartment to apartment and city to city for indeterminate lengths of time. Alas, I had to subside on beer and straight whisky and even had to place limits on receipt of gift beer during the last leg of uncertainty.
But now NOW I am open for business AND our new place has tons of storage space for bottles and glassware (as well as a wine fridge). I need you to help me fill that space and my gullet.
I am not starting from scratch (I’m not a monster), so I have some base spirits and still have my trusty bottles of cherry heering and creme de violette, but I don’t have, say Sharky’s allspice dram or any chartreuses and such.
So I ask YOU, my fellow commentists, what should I, nay, what NEED I add to my bar and for which concoctions? Consider it a given that I will have luxardo in both liqueur and cherry form, peychaud’s and angostura bitters, bourbon, rye, scotch, tequila, mezcal, and gin.
What I’m really looking for is do I need to buy some sloe gin? If so, what kind and what can I make beyond a fizz? Is Galliano a nice to have or a never bother? Have you stolen Rikki’s insulated martini shaker and want to send it to me as a housewarming gift? What’s out there that you think I need to know about? And hell, maybe there’s a brand of bourbon, rye, scotch, tequila, mezcal, gin, vodka, amaretto, brandy that I absolutely must try, go ahead and let me know about that. Who knows, maybe Lady BFC will even let me host an east coast gathering now that I’ve met a sufficient quantity of you in person without being murdered or defenestrated. To the comments FOR THE SAKE OF KNOWLEDGE.
Recently discovered the Spanish old fashioned. Bourbon, cream sherry, chocolate bitters, garnish with orange peel. Holy shit is it a fantastic switch from a standard old fashioned or manhattan.
Aguamiel blanco tequila is good and cheap, and is good for margs and ranch water. Pimm’s is a weird gin-based British liquor, but a Pimm’s cup is great light drink on a hot day. You always need bitters, cointreau, vermouth, bailey’s, other shit like that for random mixes. We don’t drink vodka or gin much, but we always keep around a bottle of both for company (stoli and sapphire, respectively). Important to have rye on hand (Bulleit is the best at a reasonable price, but Journeyman is a good small-batch one out of Michigan), and we always buy a handle of Irish whiskey before St. Patrick’s Day because sales, and that usually lasts until the next St. Patrick’s Day. You’ve got everthing else covered with your bourbon/whiskey/brandy etc. in your post above, so have fun. Also, don’t put Malort in it, as that is hipster bullshit that I never heard of growing up and it tastes like weird butt. Have fun.
This was the second most useful thing in this post.
I’m usually about as useful as Madison Cawthorn’s legs.
I forgot, you need all the non-alcoholic shit too (simple syrup, soda, tonic water, ginger beer, ginger ale, 7up/sprite/coke, etc.) and some cool Bears glasses. I have a set of these from my neighbors growing up. Nothing better:
So horrible.
Not the joke, the glasses.
Found a funny;
give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day, push a man into a volcano and the sun god will ensure a bountiful harvest this season
The Far Side is sorely missed.
Wife: “Honey, how do feel about nachos tonight?”
Me: “WHY ARE YOU TAUNTING ME SO!?”
/may not have happened
Dram of Scotch achievement unlocked as well.
And bemzima with the PK
RMadrid is finally Rockingggg 💪
Hahahaha
RealMadrid is Rockingggg!!!
Dude
Took em long enough!!!
Fucken Real Madrid. You can’t kill ’em.
Bananacakes achievement is unlocked
Holy shit Madrid.
Bananacakes achievement unlocked…?
Welp, extra time is going to be interesting…
Finally! Finally! Shoen has turfed at least 6 guys from the Giants scouting department. Years overdue.
https://www.bigblueview.com/2022/5/3/23055220/giants-move-on-from-two-pro-personnel-scouts-per-report
But they’d been so successful at developing prospects!
Uf. Mahrez
With The Heavy Hoof!
TUDN narrators calling for the Red Cross to help Walker out 🤣
MLB Pitchers Are Fucked In the Head, Part 120435796413541:
https://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/33855451/madison-bumgarner-ejected-arizona-diamondbacks-miami-marlins-game-awkward-exchange-umpire
Umpire should have been escorted off the field by security and tossed into the parking lot.
I’ve got this Peanut butter whisky from Skrewball, I get that it doesn’t seem like it would work, but it totally does. It’s a bit sweet, with hints of caramel in it, along with the peanut butter flavoUr.
I’ve been having it on the rocks or in some hot chocolate.
Man city vs RealMadrid round 2! ⚽️
Hopefully it’s rocking!
I’m not saying the rest of you are useless, but I will say only Horatio had a box of beer delivered to my house today.
If he didn’t include a box of Kraft Dinner and Alberta Pure vodka, he’s worse than Litre Cola.
I don’t think there’s any doubt that I’m worse than most of you.
You’re a law-talkin’-guy, so, it’s a given.
I have news for you about 3/4 of the members of this club…
Despite that handicap, you’re still worse! Congrats!
Pfft, been done before…..
I think I still owe you some
I’ll take it
I was going to send you something, but the terms of the restraining order were quite clear.
As to bar equipment — I am a big proponent of the Boston shaker (the “smaller metal cup that fits into a larger metal or glass”) plus a Hawthorne strainer over the more common “metal cup with a metal lid and built-in strainer”) arrangement.
A juicer is really useful; it’s less work and also helps you get the most juice out of your lemons, limes, etc.
And those ice cube trays for making the big cubes or globes are nice.
‘The Boston Shaker’ is going to be the only option left if Roe v. Wade is repealed
Wasn’t there some high-profile criminal trial back in the 90s in Boston of some English au pair who was accused of shaking the baby to death? I remember that being a brief media sensation.
Edit: Found it!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louise_Woodward_case
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louise_Woodward_case
From today’s Wall Street Journal:
Meanwhile, the federal Trademark Trial and Appeal Board is currently refereeing a trademark dispute between two criminal defense attorneys in Texas—both of whom handle marijuana-related matters—over who can call themselves the “dopest lawyer.”
https://www.wsj.com/articles/best-lawyers-list-dopest-lawyer-litigation-11651676657?mod=hp_featst_pos5
That bottle of bourbon could very easily collapse the skull of a drunken, passed out hobo if you used the proper technique.
/did I say that out loud?
Yes, but it’s not clear which of your voices said it.
Just read this in the news: “Musk has said he wants Twitter to “ authenticate all humans,” an ambiguous proposal that could be related to his desire to rid the website of automated spam accounts.”
…and that made me think of this from Revelations: “…it causes all, both small and great, both rich and poor, both free and slave, to be marked on the right hand or the forehead,so that no one can buy or sell unless he has the mark, that is, the name of the beast or the number of its name”
Yet another clue that Elon Musk is indeed the Anti-Christ.
“I’m on board! Oh wait, you said ‘authenticate’? Never mind.” — Bender
Nah, he’s just some loser flipping out cause his ex hated his penis SO MUCH that she’s now getting pleasured by pretty much the exact opposite of one.
Some J&B, old standard
For base spirits, I would add brandy and Calvados (or apple brandy) to your list.
You didn’t mention vermouth, but I would say both dry and sweet are bar staples, even if you’re not into martinis and Manhattans. Along the same lines, Lillet (blanc and rose) are nice-to-have but not essential.
Campari has many uses even if you’re not a particular fan of bitter drinks. An amaro is probably only useful if you like the bitter.
A small bottle of absinthe will last you a long time, but there’s really no good substitute so I highly recommend.
I’ve found the chile liqueurs quite fun to play around with, and Canton ginger liqueur brings something unique. Same for the allspice dram.
Some stuff that has been sitting in my bar for a long time, which I will not replace when they run out: Cynar, Pernod, Frangelico, Macadamia nut liqueur (I think I brought this back from Hawaii), Chambord, amaretto, pear brandy. None of them are bad per se (well, the macadamia is really sweet), but I haven’t found regular applications for them.
I think pear brandy would be good in sangria.
These are great suggestions. Forgot about Lillet, that’s on the eventual wish list, too. I like to keep sweet vermouth and punt e mes on hand and typically go with st George verthe absinthe but am very open to other specific brands!
Lillet is clutch. Definitely get some of that. Also the I’m still looking for more ways to use the allspice dram. Other than tropical drinks, I think cider and mulled drinks in the fall would go far with that liqueur
I make an Old Fashioned variant using the allspice dram. It’s like autumn in a glass.
I get St. George too — the little bottles are great. Love their gin, also, especially the Terroir.
I just had two roadrunners frolicking in my yard! If you enlarge the picture, one is at the far left by the cactus, the other one is behind the chair with the blue pillow, by the palm tree. They make me sooooo happy! Meep meep!
Ugh, compressing the pic made them blurry. Trust me, they are there!
That’s a nice view! Weather’s been great lately; it may get a tad warm over the next few months.
It’s going to get stinking, hellish hot! There’s still some snow on the mountain that has the tram, I have a nice view of it.
Mmmm, Sterno!
Thanks for the inspiration, RTD…
Man, I am having issues with images… (well, I have issues galore, so why not one more?)
You’re welcome, but…huh?
From below (in reference to Everclear):
“Can’t make a Flaming Homer without it!”
‘Course I imagine Hippo would take exception to the “non-narkotic” type being used…
Get this and soon your new pad will be full of 23 year old annoying-but-attractive babes.
“eww”-Matt Gaetz
Finally, the cheer babes Gregggggggg spoke of all those years ago.
Grand Marnier, a solid silver tequila, and triple sec.
Cince de Mayo is tomorrow. Figure it out from there.
Also latest Treehouse shipment is “out for delivery” today per the good folks at UPS.
“Man, I wish *my* treehouse was going to be accessible that soon.” – Elisha
Olivia doesn’t trust Eli in high places, so it’s going to take more time to get the higher safety rails in.
/waits outside on porch all day
I need a good bar re-stock as well. I haven’t experimented with Charteruse yet, so I think that might be my next purchase.
I think you should have some sort of orange liqueur. Cointreau is my go to.
Also yes to the East Coast DFOCon
Agree with both of those.
I prefer green chartreuse to the yellow. It’s good just on the rocks, but also in cocktails like The Last Word (and its mezcal-based variant).
A fine selection of bum wines for your bum wine fridge:
Do get some St. Germaine. It’s very pleasant to add to things.
One of my favoUrites, thanks to a Sharkbait post.
One thing I can advise you *against* getting is a whole bunch of exotic flavors of bitters that you will never end up using. Like “chocolate” or “grapefruit”. If you want something to taste like grapefruit, use juice.
Eh, I’ve absolutely used both of those bitters in particular so boo on you.
I stand by my statement.
All you need. Taste is for losers, after all.
Can’t make a Flaming Homer without it!
/I mean I guess you could use 151 proof rum but whatever
I mean, you can take that and make limoncello, so there is that.
The Dr. Mrs. bought some limoncello flavored sparkling water. It’s been very amusing watching her pretend it doesn’t disgust her.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67BnSw1VtDY
Ah, good old grain alcohol-it was my best friend and my worst enemy when I was in my teens.
Purple Jesus, the finest garbage can punch. Two ingredients: Everclear and grape koolaid.
So much vomit and regret!