Zombie TWBS Wednesday Motivational

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Not on a Wednesday. Not written by TWBS. Now in POSTER FORM!

So, a few days ago, I happened to comment that we had a few motivational posters in our conference room at work and Scotchy did not believe that was actually a thing. The actual words were, “pics or it didn’t happen”.

Well, here we are. I took pictures and I will now let our esteemed colleague Litre_cola provide colour commentary on each one.

Teamwork The First

TEAMWORK

Litre_Cola – Someone always gets the credit and it ain’t gunna be you Jack.

Balls – The only credit I know about is a card that fits in my wallet. 

Teamwork The Second

TEAMWORK

Litre_Cola – Nobody has ulterior motives at all. We are all the same.

Balls – I need to hang this poster at my next orgy. 

United We Stand

Balls: I have no idea either.

LC: Historically this is wrong. Ask the folk who were livin here. Same up here too.

Vision

VISION

LC: Vision is actually knowing you WILL be hungover for 2 days if you have that 2nd bottle of wine.

Balls – And then you’ll have Double Vision!

Communication

COMMUNICATION

LC – This goes against everything I believe in. – D. Trump

Balls – I disagree! – S. Palin

Seek To Understand Then To Be Understood

SEEK TO UNDERSTAND THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

LC: Hearing is done by ears. 

Balls – Or the penis.

Customer Service

CUSTOMER SERVICE

LC: Handjibber below the table for you sir? It will pair well with your Amarone.

Balls – Don’t mind if I do! – R. Kraft

Success

SUCCESS

LC – HOW CAN I BE A FRONTRUNNER THIS WAY????

Balls – I bet you this one is very popular in Boston. 

Be Proactive

BE PROACTIVE

LC – I 100 percent believe in being proactive instead of reactive. It is one of my greatest challenges in my current job. As for people carrying their own weather? My friend from Vancouver just moved here and it has rained for a week. Checks out.

Balls – I have no idea what honor has to do with being proactive,  but there it is. 

***

Yeah. I know. 

Now, I’ve decided to get rid of all of these and replace them with new ones I discovered thanks to Dunstan!

Here are the new posters that I’ve ordered from Despair.com:

TRADITION

SENSITIVITY

SACRIFICE

TEAMWORK

Thoughts?

5 3 votes
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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Going on 16 hours of masked meetings today. Woof.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah well maybe you should have thought about that before you got into the luchador business.

Gumbygirl

To install my new blinds I had to remove the old brackets. They were screwed in there at a bizarre and awkward angle. Then I had to put in the new brackets, also at a sucky angle. My arms are killing me, but I got them up! Woohoo, it will be great to sleep in a dark room! Good night, everybody!

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rockingdog

Found a funny;

oh we’re in a “bear market”?? well I think we’re in a platypus store. that’s what you sound like. that’s you.

Brocky

I forgot how much I love this format

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Brocky

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litre_cola

That’s Matisyahu, seen him live a couple times. Solid, and now apparently a ninja.

Senor Weaselo

He came to my school once.

I have not performed with him. Yet.

Senor Weaselo

Meanwhile in San Francisco…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBQ2mjkvYY8

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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litre_cola

Chef’s kiss.

Brocky

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Mr. Ayo

Always

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TheRevanchist

Isn’t it kind of a win-win? I mean, we are talking boobs.

Brocky

Bonus points If anyone recognizes this anime

Mr. Ayo

We can only hope International Disgrace Gary Bettman also enters the health and safety protocols before the Stanley Cup is awarded.

Mr. Ayo

Also, never show or interview the owners. Total asshats, the lot of them.

Senor Weaselo

Reports of a dog rocking are confirmed. I repeat, confirmed!

litre_cola

Thats rockin

TheRevanchist

Man, I hope he rocks forever!

scotchnaut

“Oh Crap!, wasn’t ready for this!”

-Rocks

Brocky

And of course it’s in steelers colors

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What do you mean, “of course”. There was an equal chance it’d be Colts colors.

WCS

OWAH PAIN! OWAH AHHNGUISH!

Brocky

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Sharkbait

Seriously. There are four year olds that havent seen a championship. We cannot allow this to keep going.

WCS

YOUAH DO NAWT UNDAWSTAHD OAWH SUFFAHING NO ONE DENIES THIS

Brocky

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scotchnaut

The Celtics failing like a bunch of failures on their home court. #whoopsie!

Mr. Ayo

The parquet is being sullied.

(No Sully, this doesn’t have anything to do with you! Go home!)

Brocky

You’re boston.

The other team could pull out a fucking uzi and I still wouldn’t be sympathetic to you not getting a call

Dunstan

NAWT FAYYYYYUHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Brocky

The difference between WordPress and Boston?

Occasionally I like WordPress

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Senor Weaselo

Wait, so Dwayne Johnson is going to be Krypto the Superdog… and Black Adam? I look forward to the self-convo.

SonOfSpam

If he’s Krypto, will he be wildly overhyped and then a bad idea?

litre_cola

*kickour

SonOfSpam

*Molson Iced

**Moulsoun Iced

Last edited 2 years ago by SonOfSpam
Mr. Ayo

*oUwn

Horatio Cornblower

My daughter just referred to the 56-year-old guy as “the old man” and boy do I have some disappointing news for her about who’s about to have to pay their own goddamn student loans.

litre_cola

Blair witch?

I know I read this to my wife hours ago.

Senor Weaselo
scotchnaut

“You know, these little guys would have been murdered if they tried to go to the rim back in the ’80’s”

-Laimbeer, Mahorn, Mason, etc.

“You know, you guys wouldn’t have even made the roster back in the 70’s.”

-Havlicek, Dandridge, Unseld, Hayes, MacAdoo, etc.

Horatio Cornblower

LeBron James wouldn’t even notice as he ran over Bill Laimbeer on his way to the basket.

He’d probably have to notice Mahorn, because Mahorn would stab him.

scotchnaut

Bird, talking about Mahorn (“he played hard”) and Laimbeer (“he tried to hurt you”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRqFFsaxCjA&ab_channel=JonnyArnett

King Hippo

Who was everyone when they played pickup ball as a young lad? I always played as Mychal Thompson, because I was boring even aping the Showtime Lakers.

Horatio Cornblower

Alternate universe Larry Bird, the one where Bird was still slow and white, but also couldn’t shoot, pass, or jump.

2Pack

I had a decent sky hook so Alcindor/Jabbar

Last edited 2 years ago by 2Pack
SonOfSpam

Ditto, but my range was like 8-9 feet, or less than half what Kareem could do.

If you said he was the greatest ever, I wouldn’t argue.

Last edited 2 years ago by SonOfSpam
scotchnaut

Shut up! Really? How tall are you?

SonOfSpam

He’s the tallest guy in Italy.

5’9″

2Pack

6’1″ of pure bassiball derp Buddy! Plus I was in Milwaukee back then so…

Last edited 2 years ago by 2Pack
SonOfSpam

TRIED to do that. Couldn’t hit the broad side of Meghan McCain doing it.

yeah right

I use to shoot the George Mcginnes one hand free throw too. Once in awhile tried the Rick Barry granny free throw.

scotchnaut

That was one of the weirdest (slow) releases of all time but he somehow got away with it. I just don’t get it!

litre_cola

Chris Mullin sans sweet haircut.

Senor Weaselo

I was of the generation that any shot you put up you yell “Kobe!” Especially if it’s a bad shot.

SonOfSpam

KOBE!!!

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scotchnaut

Worst. Steak. Ever.

WCS

Well done, just how a certain former President likes it.

SonOfSpam

I revisit the Spencer Hall Roast of Trey Wingo’s Steak whenever I need a pick-me-up.

SonOfSpam

Byron Scott (I was an outside shooter. Unlike the Uvalde guy.)

scotchnaut

I was Sidney Moncrief when we played on 8 foot baskets because I could do the Tomahawk Dunk that was on the cover of a Sports Illustrated mag back in ’79. Go to 6:50 on this vid and you’ll see it in “reel” time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sos-vmwW36E&ab_channel=WARMACHINE2013

yeah right

I was George Gervin, with a little bit of Lloyd B Free. I could shoot like a motherfucker and my baseline turnaround jumper was deadly.

scotchnaut

One of the most brilliant quotes of all time (imo, of course) belongs to Free-

As a Sixer he had a great game against the Celtics on their home court.(scored a ton of points) He had a long, looping, high-arching jumper, btw.

“I messed up their banners, I messed them up real good.”

Last edited 2 years ago by scotchnaut
Mr. Ayo

Magic and the skyhook. Too white and too short to make a career of it, but damn I got good at it.

SonOfSpam

I would’ve gone for the Magic rawdogging.

Mr. Ayo

Sigh, if I only knew that HIV treatment was so close.

scotchnaut

I almost laughed out loud. ALMOST!

Col. Duke LaCross

Karl Malone, because I wanted to be a truck driver like my dad when I was six and I had a semi reliable turn around jumper from the block.

Horatio Cornblower

Thank god you didn’t say “because I also liked to date 14-year-olds”

herodotus450

“You guys would have played in the other league back in the 60s”

Horatio Cornblower

Love is Blind: Japan has the couples in the same room but separate beds, and I am frankly appalled.

litre_cola

When I worked in the Rockies when Japanese tours would come through the hotel they always would have two beds. Nicest people in the world to serve, no question.

herodotus450

Oh no… oh no… I have terrible news. The NHL has caught the sickness from the NBA, and apparently is scheduling two days in between Finals games…

WCS

#GaryBettmanIsAnIntergalaticDisgrace

Horatio Cornblower

Wait’ll you hear about Bettman’s determination to keep a hockey team next to the Phoenix Suns, come hell or high water.

herodotus450

Maybe they could get more fans if they had a famous coach, like maybe a really good former player like Jarri Cury or Mark Messier

litre_cola

Yes because they don’t have an NHL stadium in Quebec City….. Bettman thinks fuck it let em play at ASU in an OHL sized barn.

Sharkbait

My theory is theyre going to force Auston Matthews to sign back home and save the franchise.

Senor Weaselo

It was apparently due to a scheduling conflict or something.

Mr. Ayo

There was a potential conflict at MSG and Game 7 between the Ice Bradys and Ice Knicks and a Bieber concert. I haven’t seen anything about the finals though other than Ice Donkeys moving a couple of concerts.

TheRevanchist

Man, these Celtics are as bad as every other Boston team. Any way they can cheat, they will.

2Pack

On topic here. Ciao tutti.

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WCS

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Horatio Cornblower

I work from home, so…

2Pack

With the accompany low chick ratio huh Buddy…

2Pack

You would appreciate the climate around here now. Short shorts and halter tops are making a come back. Paying attention while driving is a serious challenge.

2Pack

And we are in a heatwave so you do the math…

Dunstan

Gotta love underboob.

scotchnaut

Is Gary Payton The Second nicknamed “The Condom That Covers Your Penis”?*

*you know, because everyone is stupid and irony is dead

King Hippo

Somewhere on earth, surely there is a poor bastard named Jimmy Hat

scotchnaut

“Warriors down 6 with 5 minutes left in the 1st quarter-the fix is in.”

-the 2002 Sacramento Kings, live-streaming tonight’s game

scotchnaut

Can someone please explain to me the popularity of Stephen A. Smith? Yeah, I’m old and yeah, I’ve come across plenty of shouty stupid people in the past. What giveth?

WCS

He’s a literal migraine that gained sentience.

scotchnaut

You spelled ‘bowel movement’ wrong.

WCS

That’s Colin Cowherd.

TheRevanchist

Imagine you are ESPN and you realize that people love to watch things they hate, The Kardashians, 90 Day Fiancé, every show on MTV. And you have a person who will yell out random sports thoughts and doesn’t care about the ramifications or if he is wrong. The people hate him so much they will tune in to watch him. Ratings and cash all around!

Horatio Cornblower

Colin Cowherd makes millions for this very reason.

See also Skip Bayless.

King Hippo

We just had an extended family dinner at The Pit (downtown Raleigh, BBQ but fancy). Our waitress was really thin and cute (YES great shoulders) with a nosering. Just for a moment, tWBS’ ghost surely swung by.

Also, Dave Doeren was hosting a FITBAW recruit in the VIP room. I decided…to leave him be to do his jerb.

litre_cola

You went out? Good on ya!

King Hippo

Small enough group, food I really like, and my mom asked me nicely.

Horatio Cornblower

Boy are you in for it in Baltimore.

King Hippo

I mean, I haven’t pulled the “fake heart attack” routine in quite some time. The classics always work best.

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll just yell “get his pills” and I’m only calling 911 if you don’t respond to that.

WCS

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WCS

By the way, “strangebeaver dot com” seems like the kind of place that needs a 25 Questions About.

King Hippo

We are getting a backlog (PHRASING!) here, Balls-y…

scotchnaut

I got this-it’s the story of an orphaned beaver pup that finds its way to a small river that needs damming. An older beaver, wise in the ways of dam building, helps our young Castor Canadensis learn proper chewing techniques.

/it was required reading in Grade 4

Dunstan

All it needs is a crossover with The Littlest Hobo

Dunstan

“Ditka is still regular size? Mini-Bears win, 96-18.” — Bill Swerski

Horatio Cornblower

Buddy, they traded their next 4 #1s to get that little guy.

WCS

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WCS

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King Hippo

#EnjoyArbys

Brocky

My high school defensive coordinator had this hanging in his class room

Horatio Cornblower

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This was always my favorite. If I ever have to go back to the office I’m gonna order it.

Last edited 2 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Brick Meathook

On the classroom wall at the AIW prototype, the number three engine room of the USS Enterprise located in the high desert of Idaho, there were wooden plaques with “Rickover Says” motivational quotes carved into them. Here’s the one I remember:

Rickover Says:
Heaven Is Blessed
With Perfect Rest
The Blessing Of Earth Is Toil

I was like “where the fuck am I?”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyman_G._Rickover

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Which of you signed me up for Washington Commies emails? I shan’t be using promo code DAD22 to get “up to” 45% off of SnyderBucks.

Col. Duke LaCross

Demotivational posters are better.

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Redshirt

.

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Senor Weaselo

There’s a bank near me called Metro City Bank. I pronounce it the Megamind way.

Gumbygirl

Ugggghhhhh! Yesterday I finally went to Home Depot to get new blinds for my bedroom window. I measured carefully to get the exact width, but… I forgot to measure for length! Zut alors! The fucking things are about 3 or 4 inches too short. I found this out AFTER I put the brackets up, of course. Goddammit!!!

WCS

“Get Dad what he REALLY wants for Father’s Day…”

To be left the fuck alone?

Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
litre_cola

Oh God yes. A day at the pub solo please, and the next morning off too.

ArmedandHammered

My latest computer build, it really is the best looking one I have ever built, plus the most powerful:

computer pic revised 2.jpg
LemonJello

Skynet? HAL? Jarvis?

Actually, that is a pretty sexy computer.

WCS

SkyHALvis

ArmedandHammered

I might have to rename it to that…

ArmedandHammered

Not that powerful, but Ryzen 5 5600x 6 core 3.7ghz, 64 gig of ram, Nividia RTX 3600 and 4T of M2 storage. I should not have to upgrade for at least 5 years.

Brick Meathook

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herodotus450

Why is it spelled gundum though

ArmedandHammered

That is just his thing, he does do Gundam models, the really technical ones, but mainly he does a comic/satire youtube site.

WCS

The USFL post was there and now…

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WCS

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Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
scotchnaut

If I put any of those garbage motivational posters in my workplace it would be defaced within an hour, or after the raucous laughter died down-whichever comes first.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The important thing is that you know your workplace pretends to care about you.

WCS

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Sharkbait

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Game Time Decision

I’d argue that to be a proper business rowing team, there would only be oars on one side of the boat.

ArmedandHammered

and some people would be facing in the wrong direction…

ArmedandHammered

and some would be rowing backwards to make someone else look bad and half would be arguing with the coxswain.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Thank God they didn’t put this current 1/6 on in primetime. Judge Luttig is simply impossible to listen to.

SonOfSpam

He’s the living embodiment of Buzz Killington.

WCS

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Game Time Decision

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And while I failed the training, I did learn a bunch of new things to offend people.
So I win.
Fuck you snowflake
-MAGA crowd

Last edited 2 years ago by Game Time Decision
Sharkbait

I love demotivational posters

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yeah right

I hope the overseers of your office are big fans of “Office Space” and they’re doing this ironically because if they put those up for actual motivational reasons?

Damn, son.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And with the posters I imagine you’ll be putting up, you’ll earn another stamp from an HR office visit

King Hippo

In case WCS needs a break from impregnating royalty, here’s long-form Athletic preview of Fuckers du Cousins:

It didn’t happen in the flash of an epiphany. Instead, it transpired bit by bit, a succession of frustrating performances, until Neal Brown arrived at the realization.
His West Virginia offenses had ranked 119th, 85th and 92nd nationally in yards per play over three seasons, and they never climbed higher than 82nd in scoring, irrefutable evidence that Brown needed to prioritize his head coaching duties and delegate the play calling.
Within days of an 18-6 loss to Minnesota in the Guaranteed Rate Bowl, Brown brought Graham Harrell aboard and handed over the offense.
“The role of head coach in college football has changed dramatically over the last two years,” Brown told The Athletic. “I wasn’t having enough time to prepare myself to call games like I had in the past because of NIL or other things tied into retaining players. I think our plays were good and our plans were solid, but I also felt like I was failing the offensive staff because we weren’t getting into the game plan early enough in the week.”
After 14 consecutive seasons of calling plays as a coordinator and head coach, Brown stepped back this spring to watch the offense be reshaped by Harrell, who is coming off a three-year stint at USC.
“Graham has great energy. He’s confident but not arrogant,” Brown said. “And I’m already a better head coach because I’m in a better head space. I’ve got more time to invest in relationships.”
It was obvious West Virginia was headed for a rebuild when Brown replaced Dana Holgorsen in 2019 — and only one inherited player has been drafted. Three years later, fans are impatient for the turnaround to take hold. Brown’s 17-18 record includes seven gut-punch losses in which the game came down to the final possession.
Such losses haunted last season’s 6-7 team. Four turnovers made the difference in a 30-24 setback at Maryland, and then the Mountaineers lost consecutive heartbreakers to No. 4 Oklahoma and Texas Tech on walk-off field goals.
“A lot of close losses,” Brown said. “But the reality is we didn’t win those games, and we’ve got to learn how to close them out.”
The remedy is souping up the offense. That could involve transfer quarterback JT Daniels taking more downfield shots, or Harrell devising ways to improve West Virginia’s red zone touchdown percentage, which has sputtered in the bottom half of the Big 12 under Brown.
comment imageThe Mountaineers believe former USC and Georgia QB JT Daniels can rekindle the five-star talent he possessed in 2018 when he won the Trojans’ starting job as a freshman. (Steven Limentani / ISI Photos / Getty Images)
At age 37, Harrell is still viewed as a rising star in some corners, though he could use a bounce-back from the USC experience. While some offensive numbers looked impressive, the running game lagged and Trojans quarterbacks threw 35 interceptions during Harrell’s three years, second-most in the Pac-12. USC’s record in that span was only 17-14, with things spiraling after head coach Clay Helton’s firing last September.
That begat Lincoln Riley taking over, which begat a staff housecleaning, which begat Harrell moving across the country to join up with Brown. Add in Daniels, and it’s an appropriate grouping, with all three invested in giving West Virginia an offensive reboot.

Offense

Quarterback Jarret Doege, after compiling a 14-12 record as a starter at West Virginia, opted to spend his final college season at Western Kentucky, a parting that made sense for both sides. Doege ranked only sixth and seventh in Big 12 passing efficiency the past two years, throwing a league-high 12 interceptions in 2021. He absorbed criticism for an offense that truly experienced across-the-board problems, including a meager running attack and too many dropped passes. Last season’s 38 sacks were the second-most allowed by any Mountaineers offense ever.
Enter Daniels.
The former USC and Georgia quarterback committed 10 days before West Virginia’s spring game, culminating a transfer process that Brown described as “a two-way interview.” With none of West Virginia’s other quarterbacks separating themselves during spring practice, the need for Daniels became clearer.
“We were looking for a guy at the end of his eligibility that had live experience at the highest level, had been successful, had leadership characteristics and felt comfortable being in a mentor role,” Brown said. “JT wanted to be comfortable, play behind a quality offensive line, have good skill players around him and a good enough defense to have the opportunity to win.”
Daniels is a fifth-year senior with two seasons of eligibility left thanks to the COVID-19 exemption. A stint playing under Harrell at USC in 2019 proved crucial in Daniels choosing WVU over Missouri and Oregon State.
“Graham said JT was intelligent and capable of making all the throws,” Brown said. “He’s humble and hungry, and he has worked extremely hard. Even though he wasn’t on a team this spring, he invested time into his body and throwing mechanics.”
The Mountaineers believe Daniels can rekindle the five-star talent he possessed in 2018 when he won the USC starting job as a freshman. A torn ACL that he sustained as a sophomore for the Trojans stretched into his debut season at Georgia. He went 7-0 as a starter across two years with the Bulldogs, though a lat injury sidelined him during the national championship run that became the legacy of Stetson Bennett.
The WVU quarterback competition that played out during spring — among third-year sophomore Garrett Greene, redshirt freshman Goose Crowder and four-star early enrollee Nicco Marchiol — might only inform who earns the No. 2 job now that Daniels has arrived.
Though three of the last year’s top five pass catchers transferred, including team leader Winston Wright (63 receptions, 688 yards, five touchdowns), Daniels is encouraged by the skill players who are returning. A three-man set of Sam James in the slot with Bryce Ford-Wheaton and Kaden Prather on the outside could be the most dynamic starting group in the Big 12 outside of Oklahoma. James has 144 career catches entering his redshirt senior season, and coaches think his best is yet to come. The 6-foot-3 Ford-Wheaton (81 career catches, 1193 yards and eight touchdowns) is a big, athletic target, and the 6-4 sophomore Prather may have the most potential of them all.
“He’s got an opportunity to be special,” Brown said. “He’s strong, fast and understands route running. He can be a high-end Big 12 wide receiver.”
comment imageWide receiver Bryce Ford-Wheaton reacts after a pass is broken up against Minnesota in the Guaranteed Rate Bowl. (Mark J. Rebilas / USA Today)
Running back is the offense’s deepest position despite the graduation of Leddie Brown, who closed his career with consecutive 1,000-yard seasons. He had the fifth-most touches of any FBS player since 2019, and now the Mountaineers will shift away from the workhorse model to a group headlined by junior Tony Mathis, sophomore Justin Johnson and Clemson transfer Lyn-J Dixon.
Mathis had a 118-yard effort in the regular-season finale at Kansas, started the bowl game when Leddie Brown opted out and finished the season with 72 carries for 312 yards. Dixon, a former four-star recruit, played behind Travis Etienne and Will Shipley at Clemson and averaged 6.5 yards per carry over four years with 14 touchdowns.
Tight end Mike O’Laughlin has 32 catches in his three seasons, though he’s rehabbing from his second major knee injury.
West Virginia’s offensive line, a point of frustration during Neal Brown’s first three seasons, looks primed for 2022 with five starters returning. Sophomore Wyatt Milum, a star in the making, moves from right to left tackle in a swap with Brandon Yates. Senior left guard James Gmiter has 25 career starts and junior right guard Doug Nester has 30 dating back to his stint at Virginia Tech. Junior center Zach Frazier, with 22 starts, is an All-American candidate.
Yates is the only starter whose job could be at risk, though coaches like the improvement he showed over the second half of last season.
The group has experience, continuity and grit, and it also has a point to prove. The sack allowance last season was a problem — even if some could be attributed to Doege hanging on to the ball too long. West Virginia didn’t generate the run-game push it wanted either. Mountaineers running backs averaged 2.1 yards before encountering contact, according to PFF, which ranked 57th in the FBS and seventh in the conference.
“Everybody gave us a hard time last year,” Gmiter said during spring practice. “You’ve got to remember all the things people said. You’ve got to keep your receipts.”
Stat to know: West Virginia wide receivers dropped 5.8 percent of targets over the last two seasons, which ranks 71st in the FBS over that span, per PFF. Their 37 total drops ranked 113th in the nation.
Mountaineers returning production
CATEGORY
PERCENT RETURNING
TOP RETURNER
Passing yards5Greene, 147Rushing yards33Mathis, 312Receiving yards53Ford-Wheaton, 575OL starts92Three with 13Tackles51Loe, 38Tackles for loss55Stills, 15Sacks64Stills, 7Interceptions33Woods, 2

Defense

Dante Stills progressed from Freshman All-American to second-team All-Big 12 to first-team all-conference, so it marked a rarity when the defensive tackle chose to come back for a fifth season.
“His best has been as good as anybody in the country, but he has been inconsistent,” Brown said. “Now he has a chance to write his own story here.”
Stills’ 43.5 tackles for loss rank third in Mountaineers history — five shy of the record. His 19 career sacks are approaching the 26 his dad Gary racked up, which are second-most at WVU. Those numbers haven’t inflated Stills’ ego. Instead, he digested his NFL Draft evaluation and realized there’s much more to accomplish. Stills has better NFL measurables than his decorated older brother Darius — an All-American and Big 12 Defensive Lineman of the Year — who went undrafted in 2021.
“People always see the sacks and TFLs and think, ‘He’s good enough.’ But there’s a lot more to the game that (coaches and scouts) want that I didn’t show,” Stills said.
Just as Stills’ return was a pleasant surprise, the departure of Akheem Mesidor was a stunning turn. A promising defensive tackle who developed over two years in Morgantown, Mesidor was primed to play a featured role alongside Stills when he abruptly transferred to Miami during spring practice.
That void shifts more responsibility onto Jordan Jefferson, the 310-pound junior who started six games in 2021. Jefferson is a true nose tackle who doesn’t offer the same versatility as Mesidor. The staff acquired some help by adding Georgia Tech transfer Michael Lockhart, who chose WVU over offers from Auburn and Virginia Tech.
Third-year defensive coordinator Jordan Lesley will continue shifting Stills around to utilize his inside-outside versatility, and he’ll benefit from an even older teammate who’s returning at defensive end, Taijh Alston. The sixth-year senior, slowed by two severe knee injuries, finally enjoyed good health in 2021 when he produced five sacks and 11 TFLs.
Former Penn State top-200 recruit Lance Dixon is energized for his second season at West Virginia and brings burst at will linebacker.
“I like how they let their wills run out in space and do more things than I was allowed to do at my last school,” he said.
Fifth-year senior Exree Loe, a part-time starter over the past three seasons, can push Dixon at outside linebacker.
WVU lost the Big 12’s third-leading tackler when mike linebacker Josh Chandler-Semedo transferred. But considering how he got exposed at times in the run game, the staff may have upgraded with newcomer Lee Kpogba, who began his career at Syracuse before spending a year at junior college.
“Contagious energy and he’s a great communicator,” Brown said.
The bandit position, so integral to this defensive scheme because it can fill out a four-man front or play off the ball, is still a concern because Jared Bartlett and Lanell Carr haven’t proven themselves. The unit needs one of them to elevate their game or for them to function more consistently as a platoon.
West Virginia was exceptional on defense in 2020, allowing the nation’s fifth-fewest yards per play overall (4.65) and 10th-fewest yards per pass attempt (6.3). Lesley’s crew slipped to 67th and 79th in those stat columns last year. Takeaways became rare, too: The Mountaineers forced a league-low 13.
comment imageDefensive lineman Taijh Alston (left) and linebacker Josh Chandler-Semedo tackle Oklahoma quarterback Spencer Rattler last season. (Kevin Jairaj / USA Today)
It was a topsy-turvy season in which WVU yielded 500-plus yards at Maryland and Baylor but held Oklahoma State to a season-low 285 and limited Oklahoma to its lowest rushing output (57 yards) since 2012.
Six starters from West Virginia’s bowl game are gone, including the unit’s top five tacklers. Ramping things up could be difficult with only one starter returning in the nickel-based secondary, fifth-year cornerback Charles Woods. The Mountaineers imported experience via four transfers and junior college signee Hershey McLaurin.
That will allow the group of freshman defensive backs — Davis MallingerAubrey BurksAndrew Wilson-LampMumu Bin-Wahad and Jacolby Spells — time to develop.
“It’s finding the right pieces,” Lesley said. “They’re new but I think they’re pretty good.”
Stat to know: West Virginia pressured opposing quarterbacks on 23.7 percent of dropbacks in 2021, which ranked only 109th in the FBS and eighth in the Big 12, per Pro Football Focus.

Special teams

Casey Legg appears cemented as West Virginia’s kicker. He ranked fourth in Big 12 field goal accuracy (82.6 percent) last season, converting 19 of 23 attempts, with three of his misses coming from 44 yards and beyond. Legg is perfect on 51 career extra points. He made 13 consecutive field goals during 2021, two shy of Paul Woodside’s program record streak from 1981-82.
Australian signee Oliver Straw could take over the punting duties.
Wright was a multiyear kick returner, so that job is wide open. The staff could use sure-handed receivers to field punts if no dynamic returner emerges.

Opposing scouting report

A Big 12 assistant coach told The Athletic that West Virginia couldn’t overcome subpar quarterback play in recent years.
“I’ve always thought they’ve had a couple really good pieces on offense,” the coach said. “But at quarterback, I thought Doege played below average. Neal Brown is a really good coach, but they were just average on offense even with some good pieces skill-wise.
“They’d bring in that other kid, Garrett Greene, to do some stuff in Wildcat packages, and he’s a good athlete. I always thought Leddie Brown was a really good back, one of the top four or five in the conference. They just needed a trigger man who can distribute and get people the ball.”
The assistant suggested the addition of Daniels, combined with the Mountaineers’ defensive track record, makes them a contender next fall.
“Defensively, they’ve been really good the past several years, one of the better defenses in the conference,” he said. “I just thought they couldn’t really get it going with Doege. If they can replicate what they’ve done on defense and get better quarterback play, I think they can be dangerous.”

How the Mountaineers have recruited from 2019 to 2022comment image
West Virginia’s most recent four classes had an average ranking of 37th nationally and sixth in the 10-team Big 12. The conference-only standings are top-heavy with Texas and Oklahoma ranking seventh and eighth, while four teams — Oklahoma State, TCU, Baylor and WVU — are bunched between 29th and 37th. Lurking at 46th is Iowa State, which has the second-most Big 12 wins during the four-year span, proof that programs that survive on middle-class recruiting can compete.
Brown’s 2022 recruiting class, his best in Morgantown, included four-star Marchiol, the highest-ranked quarterback signee at West Virginia since Geno Smith in 2009. Spells (No. 211 nationally), a cornerback from Fort Lauderdale, is another four-star who entertained offers from big-time SEC and Big Ten programs.
That follows the success of landing Milum, a difference-maker in the 2021 class, who ranks as the Mountaineers’ sixth-highest recruit all time.
Brown went through a sorting-out phase with the 2019 class, a group primarily recruited by Holgorsen’s outgoing staff. This would be the time for that class to shine as upperclassmen, but 10 of the top 15 high school signees have transferred, as did three transfers who subsequently moved on to their third school.
The current staff continues to focus on mining Ohio, Pennsylvania, Maryland and D.C./Northern Virginia for localized talent — all of which are within four hours of Morgantown. WVU has three assistants sharing Florida, the same in Georgia, two assigned to the Carolinas and two who take the lead on junior college recruiting. It takes an organized and savvy approach: West Virginia can sprinkle in the occasional top-200 recruit, but the sweet spot lies with identifying and prioritizing undervalued players that blue-blood programs are merely keeping warm.

In the transfer portal

Even aside from the Daniels-for-Doege swap, it was an eventful offseason for roster turnover.
Among the starters who exited were cornerback Daryl Porter (Miami), linebacker Josh Chandler-Semedo (Colorado), safety Jackie Matthews (Mississippi State) and slot receiver Wright (Florida State). The biggest blow, however, and one that blindsided the staff, was Mesidor, whose entry into the portal March 31 led to Brown staging an impromptu news conference.
“There are things going on in the profession that shouldn’t be out there,” said Brown, who never mentioned tampering though the undertones were clear. “I love Akheem Mesidor. I love the kid. … I hurt for Akheem just because I don’t think he’s making a good long-term decision.”
Mesidor, like Porter, wound up at Miami. Other departures were receivers Sean Ryan (Rutgers), Sam Brown (Houston) and Isaiah Esdale (Rice), linebacker VanDarius Cowan (Maryland), cornerback Nicktroy Fortune (UTSA), tight end TJ Banks (Akron) and offensive lineman Parker Moorer (East Carolina).
As for the arrivals who replenished the two-deep, fifth-year cornerbacks Rashad Ajayi (Colorado State) and Wesley McCormick (James Madison) will compete for a starting role, while Marcis Floyd (Murray State) and Jasir Cox (North Dakota State) are key additions at safety.
Tirek Austin-Cave (Miami) should be a quality No. 2 Mike linebacker, Lockhart can help along the defensive interior, and edge Zeiqui Lawson (Cincinnati) returned to his home state after a year with the Bearcats.
On offense, Dixon and tight end Brian Polendey (Colorado State) should see major snaps.

Schedule

DATE
TEAM
SITE
Sept. 1comment imagePittAwaySept. 10comment imageKansasHomeSept. 17comment imageTowsonHomeSept. 22comment imageVirginia TechAwayOct. 1comment imageTexasAwayOct. 13comment imageBaylorHomeOct. 22comment imageTexas TechAwayOct. 29comment imageTCUHomeNov. 5comment imageIowa StateAwayNov. 12comment imageOklahomaHomeNov. 19comment imageKansas StateHomeNov. 26comment imageOklahoma SateAway

Final assessment

The long-overdue resumption of the Backyard Brawl means the Mountaineers will play nonconference road games at Pitt and Virginia Tech in September. Among Power 5 schedules, that’s a rarity and could set the course for Brown’s make-or-break season. The administration recognizes a slew of positive changes he has enacted behind the scenes, and now it’s imperative that those manifest through wins. Brown’s 11-15 league record, in particular, needs immediate polishing. Considering TCU, Baylor and Iowa State have reached the Big 12 championship game, West Virginia fans are right to expect the same from their program.
The last time a blue-chip quarterback transferred to Morgantown, Will Grier fueled a high-powered offense. If Daniels has a similar impact, and Lesley’s defense continues to be viable, the Mountaineers could factor in the Big 12 race.

King Hippo

When I tried the copy and paste, I imagined my laptop saying “daaaaamn, motherfucker!”

WCS

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Gumbygirl

Casey Legg is an outstanding name for a kicker!

WCS

He’s known as Casey Buttcheeks, because they’re always clenched when he kicks.

Horatio Cornblower

As they say on the Twitter, I ain’t reading all that but I’m happy for you.

Or sorry it happened.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I feel like the “be proactive” one was designed solely for the purpose of teaching people the difference between “weather” and “whether”.

Last edited 2 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Gumbygirl

These people have never been on the Capitol Beltway at 5:30 pm on a Monday.

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Last edited 2 years ago by Gumbygirl