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The King’s Saturday Night Message To The DFO Peoples And Open Thread 2026-5

ballsofsteelandfury

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You thought I forgot about this bit, didn’t you? Well, you probably hoped. Well, nope! As your newly-crowned King of the DFO Fantasy Football leagues, champion of the Freezer Vodka League, and Benevolent Monarch of the DFO Peoples, WE pledge to you, OUR loyal subjects, to share our knowledge and update you on the goings-on in the Realm every Saturday Night in the off-season. Tonight, WE present to you a list of things that Amuse US that start with the letter E (We shall go in alphabetical order going forward) and that OUR subjects should develop an interest in:

  • Eagles (the flying kind)
  • Eggs (the eating kind)
  • Ensenada
  • Ecstasy
  • Equators
  • Equity (the real estate kind)
  • Experiences
  • Elevators
  • Ennui
  • Elephants
  • Eagles (the golf kind)

And now for something completely different…

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1000008458

WE so proclaim:

World Sport Update

The Essendon Bombers take on Fremantle in a couple of hours. Early game tonight!

Elsewhere, the Liga MX playoffs continue with Guadalajara taking on Cruz Azul right about meow.

***

General Sports Update

Does anyone realize that there is a football/soccer team in Canada named after a Toyota? FC Supra du Québec aims to have only Québécois players much like Athletic Bilbao only has Basque players and Guadalajara only has Mexican players. This is their first year of existence in the Litre League.

The regular season for most footy leagues is winding down. Don T gave you a pretty good rundown last week. One note to add: Barcelona has won La Liga after beating Real Madrid (Don T spits on ground) at home. Marcus Radford scored a beauty as featured in the gif above to open the scoring and Ferran quickly followed with a second. 2-0 was the final and many celebrations were had.

***

Other Updates

It’s going to be Memorial Day soon. WE decree that everyone should take a long weekend whether you get the holiday or not. It’s the unofficial start of summer, so it’s important to get it off to a good/fun start.

***

In this space, WE shall share OUR Thing Of The Week. Today’s Thing:

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FB_IMG_1768480830982

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OUR weekly funny:

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FB_IMG_1768480830982

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OUR weekly hot girl pic:

FJ0n-XPXwAEq8de
FJ0n-XPXwAEq8de

***

OUR weekly music video:

***

One last thing:

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

It’s a genuine goddamned shame that the Crusader bastards and their Christofascist descendants have basicallly claimed the phrase “Deus Vult”. Because with regard to the Buffalo Sabres, God wills it.

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2Pack

True to life stuff right here folks…

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yeah right

KROQ here in LA does a rock of the 90’s thing during the week.

I hadn’t heard this in awhile and it sounded really good on the new car radio.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8b88US-6ts&list=RDU8b88US-6ts&start_radio=1

1
yeah right

Present and accounted for.

My replacement car had a battery warning light 10 days after I bought it.
Bought a new battery but that wasn’t it.
It was the battery charging system.
A new alternator in layman’s terms.

Called the dealership, they had me come right in and 2 plus days later I’ve got my car back with a new alternator.

They had the nerve to charge me…

0.00 for the whole thing.

Mad respect.

4
2Pack

Thier reputation means something to them.

1
yeah right

You could tell that.

The team had pride.

0
jjfozz

Took a trip down to the alma mater for my son’s girlfriend’s grad party. So yeah, maybe I drank a bunch of tall boy Miller Lites, and then poured myself a wicked vodka tonic. And yeah, maybe I did my Monkey Walk, but hey it was a fine old time.

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WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MuCz6ghhk_o
To be honest, I’d love to get to the Owl. That would entail winning at least two playoff games!
(edit: whoopsie-doodle)

Last edited 1 hour ago by WCS
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WCS

Vichy Whalers are going to go 13 days without playing a game. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen that. Of course, they started their sweep of the Spawn of Satan Flyers before the Sabres finished their first round series.

Another reminder that Gary Bettman is an intergalactic disgrace.

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litre_cola

Hartford Quebec final.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening. We won our mini tournament today and so drank from the cup of victory.

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litre_cola

Congrats!

/slaps on ass HARD

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yeah right

It wasn’t the athletic cup of victory by any chance.

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Doktor Zymm

Aw, Amex finally remembered to charge me for my November flight

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If it makes you feel better, I ended up with a healthy chunk of PayPal’s money because their fraud prevention people are so frightfully inept.

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WCS

boooo

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Doktor Zymm

Started reading the first Dungeon Crawler Carl book yesterday, fun read for a sorta-apocalypse book!

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh I want to try those!

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Doktor Zymm

Go for it! I just bought the first one to try out, but I share Kindle libraries with my parents and my Dad must have read it before I got to it cuz he bought the rest of of the series

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Horatio Cornblower

Montreal and Buffalo going “goaltending optional” is certainly a choice

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WCS

Particularly Le Habintant.

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Horatio Cornblower

Sacre Bleu!

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Mr. Ayo

Let’s go Game 7!

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WCS

https://www.wpxi.com/news/local/aaron-rodgers-reaches-agreement-with-pittsburgh-steelers-reports-say/S73UWQGV3FG6ZGSIFNYREXLIFQ/

At long last, our long national nightmare enters it’s REM sleep phase…

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Gatoraids

Night Vaaaaxing deserves a quite defense

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Doktor Zymm

Steely McBeam will be opening a psychedelic therapy practice to help with Qaaron’s post-game recovery

1
Gatoraids

until Pete Carroll douses McBeam in jet fuel to prove his theories

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Mr. Ayo

Jet fuel will melt steel beams in Pittsburgh this year. Voodoo magic gone, playoffs gone, losing season incoming. Blue Bunny and A.A. Ron adding a shit sandwich to the end of their careers.

2
blaxabbath

Sevensburg.

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Doktor Zymm

They should put plants all over the exterior of all these new data centers they’re building, better for the environment and way better looking as well

1
WCS

Construct them next to lakes or rivers.

1
WCS

Somehow, just got a call from a man in a wheelchair in Conneaut, OH. Unless Redshirt is trying to see how far we dispatch for, not much I can do there.

There’s crossed wires, and then there’s… that.

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blaxabbath

What population size does your center center serve?

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WCS

~1.3 million

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blaxabbath

My manager texts me Thursday. Says a super’s truck is acting up — they’re all ready to pass mine down in the fleet.

So I’m looking at leasing a model y with the self driving because I will just totally use self driving. But also, I dont take care of my cars. Never have. Got yelled at all by my dad about it. Nothing have I had fewer opportunities in my professional life to do than, “take potential customers out in your truck.”

Anyways, how’s that standard with leases? Cuz the dogs are riding in the back seat. And I spill food/drink/coffee. Or if I’m whizzing in a bottle while on the highway, that’s a hazard.

Cuz I like owning my stuff because I can destroy it. But if I can destroy their stuff too, why not?

Last edited 3 hours ago by blaxabbath
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Brick Meathook

I just spent four days researching and constructing a structured total market investment portfolio for the emerging A.I. market, in all its facets, using ChatGPT and Claude for research assistance and coding help, and when I finally plugged it in and asked for the first security recommendation, it spit out:

Recommended Security
ENRON – STRONG BUY

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SonOfSpam

/uses AI to buy Brick’s suggested stock
//owns 467 shares of Ermine, the soft weasel jockstrap manufacturer

4
blaxabbath

THIS IS the regulatory environment in which Enron shines.

1
Gatoraids

it is rather cheap now

2
ArmedandHammered

Is FJ0n-XPXwAEq8de her name or QR code?

2
SonOfSpam

It’s what she likes to be called upon penetration.

2
ArmedandHammered

Prefer that over “Mom”.

3
Horatio Cornblower

“Eh”

-Oedipus

4
Col. Duke LaCross

Big difference in ads on Peacock between the Derby and the Preakness. Two weeks ago it was Woodford Reserve. Today JAGERMEISTER.

6
Mr. Ayo

Did anybody else learn the new word “zarf” today or just me?

Last edited 5 hours ago by Mr. Ayo
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WCS

comment image

Does “Smarf” count?

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Mr. Ayo

I remember “Barf”

comment image

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ArmedandHammered

And don’t forget Snarf!

0
Mr. Ayo

And also, using “ept” as the opposite of inept is diabolical. Stupid puzzle.

1
ArmedandHammered

Do you mean Narf? that one has been around since Pinky and the Brain?

1
WCS

Seem to be having an uptick in rabies around the County. Several raccoons stumbling around in the daytime. have been reported throughout the County.

What does this have to do with you, reading this? Highly likely nothing, unless you happen to be in this area. I just thought it noteworthy.

2
Gumbygirl

I saw one in Birmingham walking in circles in the middle of the street- foaming at the mouth and everything. I called 911, and the operator said ” what do you expect us to do about it?” Jesus Christ! I dunno, maybe your job?

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Do you really think Allegheny 911 is going to issue a gun to WCS?

1
WCS

Joke’s on them; I bought mine when I was living in East Virginia!

2
ArmedandHammered

At least you can get one shot off with the musket…

1
WCS

East Virginia

1
Doktor Zymm

That’s what happens when trash pandas fall in with the wrong bitey crowd

1
2Pack

Dude.
Forgot the Erotic… E…
You’re welcome for the rebound…

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scotchnaut

Apparently she has legs and knows how to use them.

3
ballsofsteelandfury

Totally should have gone with EROTICA!!

That’s on me.

1
WCS

Terrific… 16 hours again.

At least I brought foodage and got a good sleep. Yinz’re stuck with me for a bit.

4
blaxabbath

Maybe just let the first five or six die. Ease into the day with tapered expectations, as they say.

Last edited 8 hours ago by blaxabbath
6
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3frTHCqzYPI

3
Gumbygirl

I wouldn’t know. Let’s ask the one true king

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6
Gatoraids

liked original video as well

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SF1iLXSQto

and the end of the song is its own special feeling

0
ballsofsteelandfury

Not sure why this posted so early. Maybe because it’s Saturday Night in Italy?

Let’s go with that…

1
2Pack

Works for me…

2
ArmedandHammered

How’s retirement treating you?

3
2Pack

It’s great. I’m gonna fit right in with doing what I want, where I want, when I want.

Zero regrets.

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