What Kind of Circus Features Kickers? Your 2019 Chicago Bears Preview

BrettFavresColonoscopy - August 27, 2019August 27, 2019

Awesome Photoshop courtesy of Low Commander of the Super Soldiers Ah, the NFL offseason, always filled with optimism, Dan Snyderschadenfraude, and this year, a veritable Who's That? of placekickers taking a ride on the Chicago Bears carousel. Do you remember how last season ended? I wonder if anyone in Chicago has? Let's take a

New Chargers Helmet Design Proposals

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers - January 27, 2017January 27, 2017

It's been a strange couple of weeks in San Diego. There has been talk of clearing the land on the site where Qualcomm Stadium used to stand, following BOLTMAN'S exodus, in order to make way for a bid at attracting a new sport to San Diego: MLS Soccer. The plan

Halted NFL Product Endorsements

NFL Sponsors

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers - June 30, 2016

With 69 days until the NFL season starts, it's time to get back to focusing on what's important in football: #brands Through extensive research, bribes and the occasional sexual favor (I said I was sorry, Horatio!) the team here at DFO have uncovered these products that were expected to be launched

Hillary Clinton Gets a New Campaign Adviser

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers - June 9, 2016June 8, 2016

[BROOKLYN, NEW YORK: HILLARY CLINTON'S CAMPAIGN OFFICE HEADQUARTERS] ROBBY MOOK: ...and that's why I'm no longer allowed at the Costco on 118th Street. But enough about my day off! As your Campaign Manager, I want to be the first to congratulate you on officially being declared the presumptive nominee! HILLARY CLINTON: Thank you,

Roger Goodell Has A Quiet Day At The Office

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers - March 16, 2016March 15, 2016

345 Park Avenue, New York [Roger Goodell is sitting alone in his office in a massive black leather desk chair, humming the NFL Red Zone theme music as he fills out paperwork. For once, the curtains are open and the sun shines brightly into the usually gloomy, marble-columned office. The intercom

Andy Reid Arrives Late to Practice

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers - September 11, 2015January 9, 2018

[Kansas City Chiefs Locker Room] Jeremy Maclin: Hey Coach Culley, thanks for feeding us this morning. These catering companies here in KC really know how to put together a great spread. Sure is a lot better than those smoothies we were getting everyday back in Philly. David Culley: My pleasure. I wanted

Mad MaKSK: A Furious DFOde

Old School Zero - August 12, 2015October 31, 2015

[Photoshops and writing help from Mike Wallace And Gromit] (A hot summer sun is rising over the wasteland, and while the misery of life after the end remains, something is in the air--today is different, and feeling this shift, a brainless beast emerges from its cave) THE BEN: HAAARF! THE BEN HAVE