STANLEY CUP WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Enjoy the golf.
No, just kidding. Today marks the start of the year’s second golf major, our national championship, the US Open. It’s second of the four annual biggest events on the golf calendar, and has an earned reputation as being the “toughest test in golf.” That is most definitely the case this year, as the US Open returns, for the record, ninth time to historic Oakmont Country Club, located just outside of my hometown of Yinzburgh, PA.
For me, this is where the fun really begins. There’s none of the snooty attitude that Augusta National carries with it. This is supposed to be challenging, and the best test there is. It’s also the most democratic field in golf: anyone who wants to try, can sign up for local qualifying. Make through that, you’re on to regional qualifers. Pass that, you’re into the sectionals. If you finish in the top 35-45 (depends on the year) in the sectional round, you’re in the Open. Tony Romo infamously tried this twice in the early 2010s, with typical Romobylian results.
The proverbial favorites are again listed as those expected to raise the trophy Sunday evening. World Numbers 1-3, Jason Day, Jordan Speith, and Rory McIlroy all have wins around the world in 2016. Others mentioned as contenders are Dustin Johnson, 2013 US Open champ Justin Rose (provided his bad back allows him to play), and Masters champion (and successful WCS pick) Danny Willett. Let’s also not forget this is Phil Mickelson’s 26th attempt to win the national championship. It’s the only major he has not won; he’s been runner-up a record six times. If it is Phil’s week, he’ll become just the sixth player to complete the career grand slam.
Oakmont is known for it’s ridiculous rough, and it’s lightening-fast greens. Whomever wins will need their short game and putter on point. The weather is also expected to have a major role. Thunderstorms and showers are predicted all through Thursday, and early Friday. This will soften the course, and essentially end the hopes of guys like Luke Donald, 2003 winner Jim Furyk, and 2014 champ Martin Kaymer. All three all world-class players, but, just don’t have the driver distance to make up for a soft course.
The coverage begins at 10:00 EST on FS1, and then at 17:00 on Fox. I honestly don’t have any intuition who will be adding “US Open Champion” to their resume Sunday night, so I’m going cheap, and saying Rickie Fowler.
Germany has perhaps the widest range of foreign names of any country in the world.
Today, my Spanish announcers are calling it Alemania.
Despite what you may be thinking, this is not due to their legendary love of beer. They don’t really make ale in Germany anyway.
What it means is “land of the Alemanni,” “a confederation of Germanic tribes on the upper Rhine river. First mentioned by Cassius Dio in the context of the campaign of Caracalla of 213, the Alemanni captured the Agri Decumates in 260, and later expanded into present-day Alsace, and northern Switzerland, leading to the establishment of the Old High German language in those regions.”
This land was in what is now the upper Rhineland and Alsace, which is why the French also call Germany a name derived from the Alemanni–Allemagne.
Language is fun!
Oakmont.
The only Open golf course with a turnpike running through it.
YINZERS GON YINZ
THIS POLISH GOALIE I CALL HIM THE WARSAW GHETTO, BECAUSE HE’S GOT A WALL IN FRONT OF THE NET!!!!!
Yes dear, that’s lovely.
But when I asked you to tend to the flagstick I had something else in mind.
#wouldpen
If Poland gets a point out of this game, they should throw a parade. Germany is playing really good and look like they’re about to break out.
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/07/13/article-2690694-1F9DB1B100000578-964_306x423.jpg
http://theoriginalwinger.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/sexy-soccer-20121.jpg
Apparently Crosby edged Kessel by 3 points in a non-transparent Conn Smythe media balloting. What I want to know is, how many members from the Toronto media get to vote and how many of them placed Kessel 3rd or not on the ballot.
I demand a recount and transparency!
Germans looking to annex 3 points from Poland. Poland has benched their starting goalie and Kapustka. The goalie is said to have a calf strain, so that makes sense. But Kapustka? I thought he was Poland’s best player last game. I get that he’s young, but, why not reward him for last game?
Maybe they are afraid that the German Blitzkrieg will render him Katput-ski.
After the Gleiwitz incident they were justified.
Gun is too near poop stain. Will not go bang.
He always carries a shit stain?
I think you misunderstood my joke.
Maybe he was just listening to the wrong radio station.
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
“Grossmutter gestorben!!”
This made me laugh so hard.
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/062011/1308916332_dog_vs_girl_car_race.gif
I like this better than NASCAR.
I want to see those two dogs take on two Kangaroos.
This is the best round of Mario Kart Double Dash I’ve ever seen.
I like this.
I would have liked it better if the chick in the VW(?) would have hit a rock and face planted…but we can’t always have everything.
Go Team Dogface.
If NASCAR ran it, the winning pusher gets to fuck the other driver.
Did that gif stop giffing on your screen? I HAAAAAAAAAAAAATE that.
My dad is alive and came back after 5 hours of being gone. I still have no idea where he went
Glad to hear everything you’re old man is back and safe. Does he not carry a cell with him? Did he tell you where he was going? How old is he?
Did you see a card that looked something similar to what’s on the car? I hear Classi is touring
He won’t win, but, it’ll be interesting to see Tiger Woods play
Wake, unrelated, but I saw your question on getting a next gen console in the open thread this morning and wanted to put my two cents in.
To me, it really comes down to 2 things:
1. Do you play games with friends? If so, get the console they own so you can.
2. Do you care about Halo? Yes? Get a Rex-box. No? PS4 has and will continue to have more and wayyyy better exclusives. See Naughty Dog, all.
I’m just a casual gamer. Why is Xbone considered a better entertainment system? I sold it to my wife that way. Ps4 can still show Netflix and shomi and those kinds of stuff, right?
Also, at E3 MS just announced a new version of the XBOXone which is smaller, has no power brick and does 4k output. It will also play new 4k Blu-Ray discs.
http://www.cnet.com/products/microsoft-xbox-one-s/
What I was trying to say is that you may want to wait and get a better media center/game system, especially if you own or plan to get a 4k tv.
A little light reading on the subject: http://www.usgamer.net/articles/xbox-one-vs-ps4-finding-a-spot-in-our-living-rooms
Full disclosure: I’m a pretty avid gamer. I own a PS4, and think that it works flawlessly for any entertainment functions beyond the actual gaming experience, but so did my PS3, save for some longer loading times. I only know one person who owns a Rexbox One, but from my understanding, M$ is trying to hype the voice commands a lot, and they don’t work as well as they should. The true difference is what I talked about above, and the “entertainment” aspect is really negligible in my opinion. You’d be fine with either.
But yes, as ArmedandHammered says, there will be new versions later this year, as well as a slim for the Rexbox, but unless you own a 4K TV, or have plans for one in the future, you’ll be fine with the ones out right now, but they will be much cheaper when those are released.
Heh. Xbone.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-N_lh2_E-8C0/UUiiOeaxVFI/AAAAAAAAAdQ/R58ZoQgMp-Y/s1600/gif-crash-cars-Russia-453913.gif
Dustin Johnson will win because apparently Wayne Gretzky has been giving pointers.
http://fansided.com/files/2014/04/paulina-gretzky-golf-digest-photoshoot.jpg
A swinger!
Didn’t want to thread-jack, but I want to make a public service announcement:
Due to unforeseen conditions, I will probably be posting last week’s AFL Beat sometime late tonight. Also, don’t forget to PUT THE TIP IN!!
http://www.averagemarrieddad.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/just-the-tip.jpg
I always assume you are gonna try to stick the tip in. I would be more surprised if you don’t
Obama doing immigration sweeps again?
http://www.wnd.com/files/2016/01/obama-cries.png
THAT’S NOT MY FINGER!!!
I still hate you all, I just liked that pic
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/062011/1308850259_dog_driving_a_car.gif
Alison Brie on imgur. Fuck imgur
http://i.imgur.com/0BTcr.gif
http://31.media.tumblr.com/a77486a88b8aae21f28c6c6a34b3eab8/tumblr_mrtp3iNLGE1qdlh1io1_400.gif
I think she needs to enter the concussion protocol… and not drive anymore.
Not sure they could differentiate from her baseline and a concussion state.
You know who sucks?
http://www.stuffking.com/images/Family_Guy_Your_Mom_Navy_Shirt_POP.jpg
I saw the ball sitting on the tee and I just couldn’t help myself.
It was a good drive, straight down the middle.
The fairway was a lot tighter than I expected.
http://www.drollnation.com/gallery/2012/08/funny-car-drifting-animated-gif-drollnation-com-17340.gif
I have like 1.5 liters of whiskey and it is only noonish. I should do some day drinking
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/012012/reverse-1327515854_zebra_bites_girl_in_car.gif
I like that Zebra
Really hoping Lefty gets the win and pulls off the career grand slam.
He and Jimmie Johnson are the only sports related things San Diego can be proud of for the foreseeable future, and while I don’t really care about either sport they’re involved in, I think it helps to at least quell the STOMP STOMP CLAP from plunging us into eternal darkness.
http://iruntheinternet.com/lulzdump/images/dog-driving-car-swerving-bad-driving-1398041594d.gif
Check dat ass shakin’
http://www.best-gif.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/funny-gifs-Car-twerking.gif
HE’S OK! But still stupid.
http://iruntheinternet.com/lulzdump/images/gifs/crazy-car-crash-russia-guy-okay-miracle-13860953542.gif
These crash test dummies are OK too.
http://www.ohmagif.com/gif/0811/car-crash-and-spin.gif
These crash test dummies are not OK.
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/112011/1322508191_family_guy__peter_lockedhis_keys_out_of_the_car.gif
I think I liked about three of their songs….. not sure, it’s been a while. On the other hand metered and gauged crash test dummies are pretty cool.
I blame Moose for that accident
My dad is the most angry person you ever met, but he needs steroids so he doesn’t die in his sleep. I am just assuming he didn’t tell me he was heading to Chicago today
I have worn pants far too long today, i should turn off my computer and nap for a couple hours
I am not lying when I worry my dad might be dead somewhere because I have absolutely no idea where he is and he is sick all the time
I don’t know what to say. I hope everything turns out ok.
He should be ok. I am just being ultra paranoid. We talked like 5 times this morning and he never mentioned a trip though
Posting test. Have I finally replaced the-no-longer-works Imgur?
Slight breeze.
And that’s a 747.
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/GIF/2014/07/Funny-GIF-Half-a-car.gif?gs=a
Well, damn it.
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/032012/1332441334_dog_driving_car.gif
Well, we know how they got to the airport.
http://www.best-gif.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Funny-gifs-Please-dont-forget-your-parking-ticket-for-mother-Nature-or-your-car-will-be-move.gif
My dad decided to fuck off to Chicago without telling me or just spend 3 hours at the store. I am hoping he is not dead but I have no clue where he is
I still had this search tab open. I feel I shouldn’t waste it
http://img001.lazygirls.info/people/avatar/avatar_alison_brie_gillian_jacobs_LnjZk9SO.sized.gif
http://67.media.tumblr.com/25809427515b37e3760d3b18aef37c08/tumblr_mqdicviQFW1qasw9eo4_400.gif
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6q29pxe641qmm8t3o3_r1_500.gif
http://i43.tinypic.com/xnwwmu.gif
That’s the gif I was looking for earlier.
Last night it was 95 degrees with 100% humidity. Today it is like 55 with a stale humidity level of a hockey rink. I am home
Catherine Zeta Jones in Entrapment is always awesome to see. It was also sadly her peak. I could spend like 3 hours talking about how great a peak it was. I almost want to now
Use plenty of pictures and no one will complain.
I think Spieth has a great chance. He just needs to build a big enough lead that he can choke on Sunday to his heart’s content and still have a big enough lead to win.
What about Rory Macklemore?
/dying
http://i.makeagif.com/media/6-16-2016/ZY-qY6.gif
http://golf.swingbyswing.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Rodney_Dance_Caddyshack1.gif
Poland-Germany later today.
No history between those two.
I am pretty sure they forgot all about that stuff by now
In the second half the Russian National team will assault the goalie from behind.
I used to go to a lot of soccer games at UCONN where I was one of the chief hecklers.
Try to hide your surprise.
During one game we were criticizing the other team for playing “German style”, which at the time involved packing the box and doing nothing interesting. At least that was my understanding; at the time I knew far less about international soccer than I do now, and that’s not a lot.
ANYWAY, after a barrage of “German-style” chants one of my friends yells “Oh for Christ’s sake, just cut a deal with Russia and go ahead and attack Poland.”
“. . . . which at the time involved packing the box and doing nothing interesting.”
-Horatio’s wife describing the first time they slept together
Aw, that brings back memories of the time I heckled the Caltech goalkeeper so hard their coach yelled at me.
The line that ruined golf for everyone
Hey! Let’s dance!
http://i.imgur.com/SQZ82eP.gif
http://golf.swingbyswing.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Chevy_Drink_Caddyshack2.gif
http://bavatuesdays.com/files/2012/01/knight_golf.gif
I played golf yesterday with a guy like this. Took him 25 seconds to address the ball, and then he would shank it right every time. At least I very quickly shank my shots. IT’S CALLED GOLF ETIQUETTE!
I very quickly shank my fellow prisoners; you need to be consistent.
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–MP_CSTZU–/180bqah1j6e2ypng.png
http://d32swstyppi9nx.cloudfront.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/id-keep-playing.gif
I like that Danny Noonan kid.
Man, the last time the English crushed the Welsh like that Edward I was in charge.
Motherfucker.
I thought we were going to beat the other country in my ancestry for once.
http://zntent.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/6992280-catherine-zeta-jones-wallpaper.jpg
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-P0eI_sVadc8/VOSxOwGXsdI/AAAAAAAA1n4/O-bc6jtUoMA/s1600/Entrapment-1999-Catherine-Zeta-Jones-5.jpg
/I’ve never seen that first woman before. I have no clue who she is honest.
“It’s not sexual, just a really big fan.”
“Really cuz in that picture she is wearing a bikini”
Tits.
Just trying to drive traffic to the site.
Sorry. I have been up 5 hours. I should have posted something. Summer Glau
http://img.ifcdn.com/images/e53d787395b7111046f8309558ae54fe43d8caa548f9036ec3b57bfa8ed91b69_1.gif
re The Video: What’s up with that bitch’s chin?
Also Tin Cup is a great movie
Yeah, it is already being delayed for weather at 9 am