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TGISF…aka “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” Sexy Friday Open Thread

theeWeeBabySeamus

/

, , , ,

No, I’m not planning on linking that song.  You’re welcome.

But I am linking this one (and a bunch of others you’ll probably hate…sorry, not sorry)

–

So what should we talk about?  Nothing?  I couldn’t agree more.  The less I talk the better.  I’m confident you agree.

Here, have another coupla songs about being happy.

Oooops, those aren’t terribly happy I guess.  Funny how something can be so misleading.

Maybe next time I should be more discerning and actually do my due diligence before committing myself and getting disappointed.

Oh well.  It happens.

Shall I try again?  Sure, why not.

Now we’re talking.  THAT is freaking happy.  Right?  So why does it make me want to murder myself?  But I did warn ya’s that that one would make a return appearance eventually.  Maybe next time you’ll listen to me.

No, probably not.  No one ever listens.

–

Honestly folks, I’d love to have some wonderful subject/topic to talk to you about this week.  But I don’t.  And I’m not going to fake it.  Plus, at least a few folks are probably worried I’m gonna really muck this up this week.  Their worries are not without merit, if I’m being honest.  I have the same concerns, FWIW.

Thus the no talky talky policy this week.

There will be no theme this week.

No sports or current events, either.

Not gonna lie, my heart just isn’t in it this week.  The Pimp needs a nap.  And then some.

So here, have some photos of some attractive ladies which don’t cross the line.

Maybe next week I’ll do better (but it’s probably wise not to wager in that direction just yet).

–

Kinda tame this week I suppose.

It happens.

–

At least these songs don’t suck.  I’ll fight you if you say otherwise.  I might be willing to fight you even if you don’t say otherwise.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKuqaZ0DQtk

 

Have a good weekend, folks.

Try to be happy.  That’s all we can do.

Love ya’s.

–

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Beerguyrob

Question: Can you hate-drink until you hate drinking?

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...

I have.

1
Doktor Zymm

If I was a coach, and I had to make cuts, and I was a total bastard, I would play the Silhouettes song “Get a Job” while issuing pink slips

0
Duchess

Cutler possibly to the Dolphins with Gase… dear lord.

1
...

Oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes

0
...

I would root for the Dolphins so hard if this happened. A surprise playoff run would be the best way to taunt those mouth-breathing Swerskis.

1
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Since I heard the rumors starting I have been rooting for it

1
Doktor Zymm

I haven’t done any drugs in a long time, that’s both good and bad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGC2pOpohUE

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Horatio Cornblower

Hey, I just came back from seeing ‘The Dark Tower’ and if you’re planning to see it, well, don’t.

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Gratliff

Were you a fan of the books?

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Horatio Cornblower

Loved the first three, thought the 4th was OK, started to get a really bad feeling in the 5th and loathe the 6th and 7th.

I have refused to read the 8th one that he added a couple of years back.

1
Gratliff

That’s unfortunate. I was looking forward to what should’ve been amazing performances by great actors. Then again, Morgan Freeman in Dreamcatcher and Anthony Hopkins in Hearts in Atlantis, so yeah.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Hearts in Atlantis movie adapt can eat the whole bag.
I had this conversation with someone a few nights ago, in fact.

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Horatio Cornblower

Elba is fantastic as Roland. That was an inspired choice. McConaughey is fun as The Man In Black, just not what I had pictured in the book.

The problem is that the movie was significantly less than 2 hours long, had only the barest connection to the books, and it definitely looks like at some point it was a lot longer and they couldn’t figure out how to edit it, so they just threw darts at a board and chopped stuff accordingly.

Putting aside my own hatred for how King ended that story The Dark Tower would have been enormously difficult to boil down to two 3 hour movies. These guys didn’t even try.

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scotchnaut

Didn’t like “The Dark Tower” huh? I always figured you as being a racist.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

How is this working nowadays?
https://youtu.be/nW5j9lyAxOA

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Gratliff

Has to be the full URL.

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Doktor Zymm

Last one before I stop caring and drink a bunch of gin :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nW5j9lyAxOA

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Shogun Marcus

Am i doing this right?
https://youtube.com/watch?v=tZFlKWCX30E

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

I found out who Mudvayne were when I asked a guy about his hoodie, that had chemical symbols spelling out the band name.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

Additional fun fact : I’ve gotten shit faced at the White Horse and didn’t die like that pussy Dylan Thomas

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Horatio Cornblower

Well 19’s apparently still the record.

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King Hippo

Did you at least talk to Boss Hogg whilst there?

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Evening gents and lady.
I’ve just finished a 12+ hour day of babysitting my racist Alzheimer’s uncle.
I’m tired. But it’s over, this time at least, so I’m happy.

Hope you all are too.

/cracks open HRTN freezer vodka
//owes beastmode $5 for royalties now

Dammit.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

Fuck hate, let’s drink!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Ok, fine. If I have to.

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King Hippo

You just have a whole racist checkerboard of kinfolk, dontcha? I really only had the one grandpa.

But he made up for it by being extra super-duper racist.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

It took him more than an hour to drop an N bomb today.
Improvement ftw.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Also, I still gotta go tomorrow to pick up the dead one.
Monday, for the first time in my life, I got to tell him what a prick he is without him being able to say some stupid shit in return. Being dead makes that more difficult.

I got the the last word in, you useless fuck. I win. Bon Voyage, fucker.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

….Or something more loving which a grandson should say.

Nah fuck that. Fucker needed to die 20 years ago. Letting him live this long was some cosmic fucking dark joke on my family.

Not exaggerating.

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Doktor Zymm

Fun fact : the term “getting high” used to apply equally or even moreso to getting drunk

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Wasn’t it for opioid’s first?

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Brick Meathook

I prefer “getting tight” from olden days.

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laserguru

Yeah we’re gonna get loose!

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scotchnaut

#notsurerollson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ht6J5stphHs

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King Hippo

ah, memories of “The Gang Squashes Their Beefs”

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Gratliff

Garbage is different from what I remember
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxkE0Nj4Dgw

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Doktor Zymm

I’m gonna start a band called Rubbish that just does Garbage covers in a bad British accent

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Senor Weaselo

tWBS will be your biggest fan.

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Shogun Marcus

Careful…twbs will murderdeathkill if you mess with shirley.
/I wouldn’t be far behind .

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herodotus450

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Sir Shogun is not incorrect.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lpcdAR9ij0

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

First thought : Is that from Vanishing Point?
Second thought : So many ways that could very painfully go wrong

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yes.
She’s a good rider.

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scotchnaut

“A really good rider would include no brown M&M’s, buddy boy.”

-Van Halen

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scotchnaut

There was a very influential band called Television once upon a time-that’s why I’m posting something by Tom Verlaine. #notsure

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UI83HkmIFcE

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Doktor Zymm

I gots me some Television on vinyl.
I also,once upon a time had a latish pressing of X-Ray Spex, which is apprently worth bank now, and totally lost somewhere in my parents house

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fuck Apple and their stupid fucking Lightning cable. You know why? Cause it shocks me. It’s not a lot of current, but if my arm is resting against it, it stings. It took a while but I finally realized it’s because the damned thing is shocking me.

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Gratliff

It says lightning cable. Right there on the box.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I fucked an apple once; not all it’s cored up to be. They make better weed pipes than jerkin’ tools.

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King Hippo

It was after watching the “Criminal” video, wasn’t it?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Are you from the Big Apple?

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King Hippo

I am drinking a giant bottle of Samuel Smith’s cider, so…

1
Senor Weaselo

Fuck yes.

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herodotus450

Big ol TI 2017 going on right about now

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scotchnaut

I very much like what Jason Statham has done career-arc-wise.

/if you don’t ask me what ‘career-arc’ actually means that’d be great.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Funny how out of everyone in Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, he’s the one that became a star.

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SonOfSpam

Well, Sting did ok for himself.

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Gratliff

Not necessarily
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Gratliff

OUTLAW COUNTRY WHOO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mV_HHL-h6g

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Gratliff

I’m always surprised how long Volbeat’s been around. I always think they just came out last year despite having listened to them for the last 4.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWHPPMcHoLk

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laserguru

I’ve seen these Swedish boys live. Fun times!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mV_HHL-h6g

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Oh, I forgot to mention. Sunday’s Game of Thrones has leaked in case people didn’t know.

::SPOILERS::

It was good.

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Doktor Zymm

I’ve heard Circei is killed by a giraffe and Arya becomes a transsexual, but no one is really sure if it’s just some weird faceless god thing

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Brick Meathook

Rosebud was his sled.

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King Hippo

and it was EARTH the whole goddamned time!!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Rosebud was his wife’s clitoris, he never found it again.

*Maybe from a different movie.

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Brick Meathook

Here’s a fully functioning jet engine built by a high school student:

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When I was in high school I built a bong.

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herodotus450

It’s a sobering thought, for example, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.
/jk obviously nothing could sober me up at this point

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

When I was 16 my mom cleaned my room when I was out and later confronted with a large box of 19 assorted experimental bongs made of various item, black PVC pipe being the chief component. The worst/ best one was the gas mask attached to one of her canning Mason jars. None were electric, gas driven, or used a compressor tho.

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Doktor Zymm

Any full size coolers in the mix?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Unfortunately no, but one of them was long enough that at 6’2″ I could stand up and take a hit.

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King Hippo

I hid porn inside my old junior high yearbooks. Beyond this, I accomplished nothing of note.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I had a couple of boxes of Playboys and Penthouses, but apparently she thought this bounty was of greater concern. Ah, 70s porn.

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Brick Meathook

Oui was the gold standard

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I “liked” that one too, but none of my uncles subscribed to it, so I couldn’t steal it.

That was in the days when Playboy acknowledged that woman had labia.

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King Hippo

So. Much. Bush.

/before two certain Presidents ruined the phrase

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

When the prevalence of fake tits was so much less.

1
King Hippo

a-fucking-men. Natural all the way. Small is totes fine with me, just don’t be bags of contact solution, pleaz.

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herodotus450

Are you Laremy Tunsil’s dad?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It was a hospital type oxygen mask…..

If I was his back and knees would have never let him get through college football.

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laserguru

We used to have the annual “Hash Bash” in Moline Illinois where the bowl was attached to the tube end of a gas mask. The end of the tube worked as a carburetor. You filled the bowl at the end of the tube with hash, lit it to get a good draw then the “point man” would remove the bowl from the end of the tube giving you a full facial hit of hash.

Then you drank a Mickeys big mouth and forgot the rest.

It may have been fun.

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Doktor Zymm

I hit the trifecta of interviewing today, in-person interview in the morning, phone interview at lunch, technical webcam/coderpad interview in the afternoon. Now I am hitting the trifecta of relaxing, drinking, sitting on my ass, and commenting on the internet.

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herodotus450

But, if you had to sort “relaxing, drinking, sitting on my ass, and commenting on the internet” what sorting algorithm would you use>?

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Doktor Zymm

library(fuckoff)

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herodotus450

Not familiar with that one but it sounds like somethign from Torvalds.

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Doktor Zymm

There’s an included function that finds a random comment on the internet and responds with an obscene emoji

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herodotus450

Just need to teach it to use the phrase “liberal cuck” and it will be indistinguishable from 99% of other commenters.

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Doktor Zymm

Turing tests have gotten WAY easier

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herodotus450

“Are you gay”
-The ultimate Turing test

1
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I would have killed myself halfway through the day, or died from panic sweat loss.

0
Doktor Zymm

I’m getting…dare I say, practiced at this shit. Also, not super invested in any of the three companies.

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scotchnaut

#notsure

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxSsol3Zd7k

1
King Hippo

That reminds me of my Rex Ryan time from earlier this afternoon…

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I am offended by this post!

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herodotus450

comment image?la=en&vs=1

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Of course I cannot define it; it is the white vague sense of rage that they tell me I should be feeling. That my way of life is being threatened by those that are different from me, those that have no real power to actually threaten my way of life.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It is easy to be manipulated into transference of my own lack of self-fulfillment and sense of easy entitlement into an anger or at the very least a highly annoyed state that enables me to fixate on almost any hapless scapegoat.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I guess what I’m saying is; great post tWBS and happy fucking Friday peoples of DFO.

1
Doktor Zymm

I think this is one of my favorite comments ever

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, exactly how much have you been drinking already?

0
Doktor Zymm

Haven’t finished the litre of wine yet….so, .85 litres of wine?

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Must be an empty stomach and a bit dehydrated.

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scotchnaut

[looks up to the sky longingly]

If only there were no posts whatsoever.

1
scotchnaut

Sorta kinda wish I wasn’t offended by your response to this post.

1
scotchnaut

Karl Wallinger from The Waterboys #dontknowwherethisthreadisgoing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ua9nXMwrIEs

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Wakezilla

Thoughts/advice needed:

I have a cleaning business in Calgary that pretty much runs itself, despite how bad the economy is hurting. Due to the housing crises in Vancouver (average home is about 1 million), I’ve been thinking about moving to Calgary to put in more effort with the cleaning business and letting it grow. The pro is that I have a significantly higher glass ceiling of making money and I could actually buy a house that doesn’t look like a cardboard box that a homeless dude jizzed on.

The con, I have to live in Calgary, which is awful. I honestly hate Calgary.

Conversely, I love living in Vancouver, but, I’ll never be able to own a house and my income is capped.

Would you move to Calgary, despite not liking the city, but could own a home and make some cash, which is always good? Or would you stay in Vancouver?

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herodotus450

I’d pick Calgary. Calgary is closer to Dog River, right? Plus, an eternally clean house with a horde of sexy maids at your command? No contest.

1
King Hippo

sounds liek someone just wants an excuse to become a FLAMER to me ,, imo godbless

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Pro: You could hang with Litre
Con: I’m the only DFOer who’s ever visited Calgary

2
King Hippo

Having been to Vancouver, it is absolutely the tits. But I must say, you’d grow to resent all the cool young people with no responsibility fun you no longer have, living there in the midst of the insanity of raising a toddler. There’s really no point in it. Move back later when you can enjoy it fully again.

0
Doktor Zymm

Questions to consider :
1) Is the market in Calgary as strong as Vancouver, in a relative sense, is your income/expense ratio really going to benefit?
2) Would this be a permanent or temporary move? How easy is it for you to pick up and go if you really, really hate it and it crushes your soul?

0
Doktor Zymm

Just a point of reference for my comments, I have an awesome condo that I love in Chicago, and likely couldn’t afford in most other cities. I also hate living here, and my home is one of about 2-3 vaugley redeeming points. I’m actually trying to move, but I’m also caught up in a bunch of cost/benefit calculus where I’m probably not valuing my health nearly enough. So…yeah, if you really would hate it, and don’t have an exit plan, then just don’t.

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’ve only been to Edmonton,,,,,, Calgary HAS to be better than Edmonton, at the very least for the surrounding country.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

My 2 cents: Can you make enough in Calgary to be able to afford moving to Vancouver in a few years? It seems that’s where your heart is.

Also, is there a Mrs. Wakezilla? If so, she will be the one making the decision, not you.

0
Wakezilla

: There is a Mrs. Wakezilla and a one year old Wakezilla-ette. To answer yours and Zymm’s question, if I move there, my wife and I would be there for at least 3-5 years (she’s all for moving to Calgary).

@Doktor Zymm: My income/expense ratio would be quite a bit better in Calgary. If my wife, daughter and I were to move to Calgary, we’d be there at least 3-5 years. To give you an idea how much I dislike the city, that sort of sounds like a prison sentence, even though I could pay off student loan/line of credit debt, own a home, etc. Messed up, right?

1
King Hippo

You have a 1-year old, the prison sentence has already been handed down my buddy/guy, eh?

1
...

Having lived ~ 2.5 years in a place purely for work and nothing else, I’d have to say I would not do it again. The impact on my mood and overall well-being easily offset the fact it was dirt cheap to live there.

0
scotchnaut

Not sure where this thread is going so I’m doing a cut from Pete Townsend’s brilliant solo effort from way back when-enjoy White City Fighting

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYJuuRALcWs

1
scotchnaut

Not sure where this thread is going so I’m doing a cut from Brian Ferry’s brilliant solo effort from way back when-enjoy The Chosen One

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idZXHRHEpkE

2
herodotus450

http://
68.media.tumblr.com/ae6c1e51c0fe3a394b3955aad4b3d415/tumblr_ooe93l9YPl1vv6huvo1_1280.jpg

0
Senor Weaselo

I thought freedom was slavery?
/We have always been at war with Eurasia.

2
Wakezilla

TWBS, suggested theme for the future: inspired by what I saw today, Hot chicks driving big trucks.

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1
herodotus450

Probably something about happiness in here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1fzJ_AYajA

1
King Hippo

What, you like butter tarts?

1
Wakezilla

TGISF. My province is still on fire and our air quality shittiness is at an 8/10. To put things into perspective, even China thinks an 8 is bad.

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1
Beastmode Ate My Baby

We’re getting a ton of BC smoke (mixed with PNW wildfires) down here. Went outside to a yellow sky and a hazy street. Looks like the beginning of a damn horror movie out there.

0
Wakezilla

Or a party thrown by Ron Mexico

4
herodotus450

Gives new meaning to the phrase “raining cats and dogs”

1
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

My sister was in China for like 6 months/a year, I didn’t keep count. Now that she is back she claims she couldn’t remember the color of blue a normal sky is because it was so awful every day. And she isn’t back to clear sky ‘merica, she is in Chicago.

2
Unsurprised

We’ve gotten your smoke here further south of Beastmode. It’s not that bad compared to the shit I breathed annually thanks to CA, AZ, and NM bursting into flames every summer, but everyone else is bitching like it’s the end of the world, especially because it’s also the hottest it’s been here in years.

Bunch of fucking crybabies in this stupid town.

0
Unsurprised

Capping off the IT’S DAMN HOT theme is Salma Hayek in From Dusk Til Dawn: https://gfycat.com/DependentPartialGartersnake

1
Horatio Cornblower

By all means, lets build a wall to keep those people out.

And by those people I mean vampires.

0
Unsurprised

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1
Unsurprised

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3
Unsurprised

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0
Unsurprised

Oh. Hello.

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4
scotchnaut

I will never not love this tune…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLeCB7Kn-VE&list=RDMMlLeCB7Kn-VE

1
ArmedandHammered

Wow, the yacht rock playlist.

1
scotchnaut

[stamps foot angrily]

This is a great song that was co-opted by the evil yacht rock people. I had no control over that!

0
Unsurprised

ALL ABOARD!

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3
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

FUCKA YOU DORPHIN YOU DO NOT GET TO DEPRIVE ME OF THIS MAN’S COMMENTARY

http://www.miamiherald.com/sports/spt-columns-blogs/armando-salguero/article165472942.html

3
Unsurprised

I was so looking forward to repeated cries of DOOOOONNNNTTTTT CAAAARRRREEEEE from the booth during especially shitty games.

1
Unsurprised

Yep, it’s Summer

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1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Who needs pics that go

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3
ArmedandHammered

This makes me happy to watch.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tI2ASp0f7GU

2
Unsurprised

Mmmm

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1
scotchnaut

Van is on your wavelength, buddy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6oZK004AWM&list=RDl6oZK004AWM

1
Unsurprised

It’s damn hot. Need to cool down.

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