Sexy Soccer Saturday Morning/Afternoon Open Thread

Good morning everyone! Today is a VERY busy day of sports action. Not only do we have a full complement of fútbol action, today is also the first full day of college football!

On Thursday, I outlined for you the fútbol games taking place this weekend. Something I did not note, but that Litre_cola was kind enough to point out in the backroom is that this week is basically Derby Week!

Take a look at what’s on tap this weekend:

Yes, the Basque Derby is already over (Bilbao beat Donostia at the San Mamés by 2-0), but you can still catch today’s matches if you have an ex-Yugoslavian family with access to one of those super-large satellite dishes.

As I’ve done previously, I’m giving you the omakase menu of what I think are your best viewing options. As always, times are Pacific and home teams are listed first:

  • 4:30 AM – Southampton v Manchester United (NBCSN)
  • 7:00 AM – Chelsea v Sheffield United (NBCSN)
  • 8:00 AM – Osasuna v Barcelona (BeIn Sports)
  • 9:30 AM – Union Berlin v Borussia Dortmund (Fox Sports 2, TUDN)
  • 11:45 AM – Juventus v Napoli (ESPN+)

(Don’t worry Fulham played yesterday – L_C)

***

College Football Viewing Guide

For those of you that aren’t willing to pay for ESPN+ (and I’m one of them), the college football window conveniently opens at 9:00 AM Pacific. You can see the full schedule of all college football games being broadcast, complete with network listings, here.

Here is your omakase menu of today’s college football offerings:

  • 9:00 AM – Florida Atlantic at D Ohio State University (Fox)
  • 12:30 PM – Alabama vs Duke in Atlanta (ABC) (because I like to see Duke getting beat up)
  • 1:00 PM – Northwestern at Stanford (Fox) (because Alabama will have a 30 point lead by now)
  • 4:30 PM – Auburn vs Oregon at Dallas (ABC) (because Match of the Round)
  • 7:30 PM – Fresno State at USC (ESPN) (because USC won’t cover the spread. You heard it here first)

***

Champions League Draw Reaction

Champions League Draw

This Thursday, the draw for the Group Stage of the Champions League took place. No, we did not get the highly anticipated Group of Literal Death featuring Zenit (Russia), Donetsk (Ukraine), Crvena Zvezda (Red Star Belgrade, Serbia), and Dinamo (Croatia) because we touch ourselves and can’t have nice things.

Also something about UEFA not letting Russian teams and Ukraine teams into the same group because there would literally be murders happening.

We did, however, get a very difficult group F, a difficult group H, and an easy as your mother group G. Seriously, anyone can win that group but not one team would be favoured to get out of any other group. Let’s go group by group, shall we?

Group A – PSG, Real Madrid, Club Brugge, Galatasaray

Have you seen “In Bruges”? It’s a great fucking movie. It stars Colin Farrell and the wonderful Brendan Gleeson as two hit-men hiding out in Bruges while waiting for instructions from their boss, Ralph Fiennes. It is dark and fucked up and funny and I love it very much. Almost as much as I love a fairly obsure Irish Brendan Gleeson movie called “I Went Down”. That one is impossible to find, but if you ever get a chance to see it, please do so. If anything, to find out why they gave the movie that particular title.

Oh, the group? I’m thinking PSG and Madrid go through, but I really hope that Galatasaray wins all their home games and can pose a threat on the road to those two front-runners.

Litre: I hope PSG kicks the shit out of Madrid and that Gala goes through.  Mi mama me hizo guapo, listo y anti-madridista.

Group B – Bayern München, Tottenham Hotspur, Olympiacos, Crvena Zvezda

I grew up knowing Crvena Zvezda as “Red Star Belgrade” when they were part of Yugoslavia (yes, that was a country that existed!). If you ever want to take a deep dive into politics and soccer and the links between them, you would do no worse than reading up on this club. Two notable books that tackle this topic are The Ball is Round and How Soccer Explains the World. If you are looking for a good book to read this long weekend, those are excellent.

Oh, the group? I’m thinking Bayern and Tottenham go through, but I really hope that the Red Star team pulls at least one upset.

Litre: That book is kick ass I also highly recommend it. Bayern and Tottenham will indeed go through. Spurs lost their soul moving in to their new digs. I predict a total of 4 murders at the 3 home games for Red Star. North London hooligans will definitely travel to Belgrade and there  will be battles. With Ryanair, and easyjet it is simple to fly to Eastern Europe for a few pence. 

 

Group C – Manchester City, Shakhtar Donetsk, Dinamo, Atalanta

There are two big questions for this group: 1) Who will finish second behind City? and 2) Will the Donetsk-Dinamo matches be violence-free?

The answers are: 1) Donetsk and 2) No.

Litre: I will bet you a chinese jersey from either team that it will be Dinamo. 

Balls: You are ON,  good sir! Winner’s choice. 

Group D – Juventus, Atlético Madrid, Bayer Leverkusen, Lokomotiv Moskva

Are you one of those people that were told by your doctor to start taking a children’s aspirin each day to prevent heart disease? Did you know that apparently, that’s not a thing anymore? What I want to know is who did Bayer piss off? Did it have anything to do with someone losing a bet on Leverkusen? I bet you it did. Someday, I’ll do a 25 Questions post about the link between Bayer Leverkusen, the aspirin company, and the secret German sex underworld. Stay tuned.

Oh, the group? Juventus and Atletico go through, but I hope that Lokomotiv wins at least one game or gets a draw so that there can be peace in Ian’s household. (Please note that I do not know which team Ian’s wife’s family supports. They could be Zenit supporters for all I know…)

Litre: Bayer deserves this because they profit off pharmaceuticals. Zenit is racist as fuck. Juventus and Athletico will go through, agreed. 

Group E – Liverpool, Napoli, Salzburg, Genk

If you guessed that Salzburg means the City of Salt, you would be a very astute person and factually correct! I know this factoid from having visited an underground salt mine near Salzburg and bringing home some Austrian salt. That’s the second underground mine I’ve ever been in. The first is the old Copper Queen mine in Bisbee, Arizona, which is a town that is full of hippies, hipsters, and other things that start with hip.

Oh, the group? Liverpool and Napoli go through but I really hope that Salzburg beats Genk because that salt was really tasty.

Litre: Redshite and Pizza makers go through. (Did I do it right Hippo?)

Group F – Barcelona, Borussia Dortmund, Inter Milan, Slavia Praha

Have you ever been to Prague? It’s a gorgeous town that was the IT town a few years ago. I don’t know if it still is, but when I went there more than a decade ago, you could still get a flavour of what it must have been like in the days behind the Iron Curtain. The repression was palpable. No wonder all the good porn stars are Czech…

Oh, the group? Barcelona, Dortmund, and Inter will fight until the last Match Day to see which two stay in the Champions League and who drops out. I wouldn’t be surprised if Barça gets kicked out early and Valverde gets fired. However, I just don’t see their exit that early in the tourney. I say Dortmund exit purely on goal differential, which is a shitty way to exit a tournament.

Litre: Other than my addiction for the shitty English side I support Barca. They are a joy to watch and less evil than Real. I always like Dortmund because their tifos are fucking kick ass and their coloUrs are cool.

Group G – Zenit, Benfica, Olympique Lyonnais, RB Leipzig

I read some stupid article where there was a class-action lawsuit in Canada that mirrored an American lawsuit against Red Bull claiming deceptive advertising because Red Bull does not, in fact, “give you wings”. Apparently, our Canadian friends can pick up a free $10 if they file a claim. Of course, like the “free” $125 that was going around earlier this year for Experian, you’re more likely to die by getting hit by lightning than collect the money.

Oh, the group? This is the group that is so wide open that Cherie DeVille is jealous. Put any of these teams in any other group and they don’t get out. Well, except for Olympique Lyonnais and only if they were in the Women’s Champions League. Their Lady Footy team is a powerhouse.

Litre : This is a wide open group. Zenit is soooo racist so they cannot be supported. I would like to see Benfica and Lyon go through. I have been to both stadiums and the home fans were really fun to party with. 

Group H – Chelsea, Ajax, Valencia, Lille

This one might not be termed the “Group of Death”, but in reality it is the most evenly-matched group with quality teams that could contend in other groups. I fully expect Chelsea and Ajax to drop off from last year’s performance while Valencia and Lille are not exactly minnows. I expect them to finish in the top half of La Liga and League 1, respectively.

I say that Valencia and Chelsea go through, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Ajax knocks one of them out and takes their spot.

Litre: I hate Chelsea as much as the Dallas Cowboys. I hope Ajax goes on a nother run because that is fun. The roof in Amsterdam Arena is just big enough to only hit the pitch when it rains, it is lovely. 

***

Litre_Cola’s Obscure team that Hippo bets on!

Today we are going to take a look at CSKA Sofia from you guessed it, Sofia. The Eternal Derby v Levski Sofia is on Sunday and I know Hippo will have a bet on them. 

 
CSKA stands for Централен Спортен Клуб на Армията or Central Sports Klub of the Army. These sports klubs seem to all come from Eastern Europe and you may have seen CSKA Moscow in the Champions League before. They all stem from the army and most fanbases are white dudes that are jacked and really like smoke and flares. 
 
They’ve been the starting point for incredible talents Hristo Stoichkov, Stilian Petrov and Dimitar Berbatov. These are the only 3 guys I can name who played for Bulgaria but I remember when Hristo had a sweet bald head but was till banging in goals. Prior to male pattern baldness hewent as far as to be a star at Barcelona where he collected 175 caps for the Blaugrana. Berbatov was a talisman for Fulham when he came over from Manchester United. He was absolutely adored and is one of the most interesting men in the world. “Berbatov claims that at the age of eighteen, he was held hostage with plans of making him sign for Georgi Iliev’s football team, Levski Kyustendil. Berbatov’s father contacted CSKA Sofia’s boss Iliya Pavlov who set things straight. In 2009, reports emerged that Berbatov was forced to leave Bulgaria, since local mafia threatened to kidnap his family.” 
 
CSKA is incredibly successful and one of two “big clubs” in Bulgaria and the game this weekend is against their arch rival. This year the club have a strange mix of internationals playing for them from Scotland (Watt), Ireland (Carey), England, Portugal (Pinto, Rodrigues) and Spain (Albentosa) . Rules in Bulgaria state that you can carry 5 internationals who do NOT have Bulgarian ancestry but you can only play 3. How the hell do guys with last names like that end up in Eastern Europe when there are lower leagues in their home countries where they would feature. 
 
Sofia is an awesome city, it is cheap, beautiful and still has an edge to it. I was there 15 years ago and Bulgaria is definitely in my top 5 countries to visit. The only worry is gypsies pickpocketing you but that happens everywhere in Europe but in Bulgaria you are in their neck of the woods. I did not get to go to a game but I would imagine it is pretty fiery. 
 
Stadium: Bulgarian Army Stadium or Стадион „Българска Армия
 
They are apparently building a new one but this place would be a party. It hold 23k and as many flares as you can stick on your body.
 
Hooligans? Did you have to ask? They are an Eastern Europe so you know they have high level crazys!. Sector G, the main stand for the ultras of CSKA, is located at the north side of the stadium. Inside the sector, the most influential supporters group is the newly founded ultras group “Ofanziva”, which was formed after the unification of several smaller fan clubs. Another strong group is “Animals”.
 
So many Adidas tracksuits!
See you again next week when we spin the Hippo gambling globe!

***

 

Most hot girl image credits go to the wonderful Futbol Babes Twitter account. Please give them a follow. Also, is it obvious that I have a thing for green-eyed blondes?

I’ll be back later this afternoon with your late afternoon/evening college football action!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Redshirt
herodotus450

Whatever the spread was for FAU-OSU, it was not enough.

Redshirt

Ohio State by 27.5

Spur

It’s the Boise State Broncos Breakfast Bash

ArmedandHammered

I want Dorian to start arriving around half time.

ArmedandHammered

Just checked look like it will miss.

Spur

Morning Folks

ArmedandHammered

Afternoon.

Redshirt

Afternoon, Spur!

(either I’m from EST and not DFO-ST, or I’m from one hour from the future)

Either way, good luck 37 minutes from now. You’re going to need it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What’d you call me?

/actually I guess I am somewhat of a morning person, at least on days when I am not hungover. But today is not one of those days.

Redshirt

If you feel like doing something stupid, just remember: the judge doesn’t return until Tueday.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My brother-in-law got sworn in as a commissioner this weekend (basically a judge for misdemeanor cases). I am interpreting that to mean that I can commit all the misdemeanors I want in YOLO county now.

Redshirt

Just remember, anything over $500 is Felony Theft.

Redshirt

(listening to OSU-FA on radio)

Me: “Is Fields a running QB or a pocket passer?”
Radio: “Fields fakes the handoff and he’s off! 40! 30! 20! 10! Touchdown, Buckeyes! Welcome to Columbus, Justin Fields!”
Me: “Either way, he sounds fast.”

herodotus450

Florida Atlantic is apparently NOT good. They down 14 after 4 minutes and two drives to OSU

Redshirt

Who’s their head coach?

(checks Wikipedia)

Well there’s your problem right there!

herodotus450

Kiffin thought “playing the Fields” meant something completely different.

Redshirt

How do you go from NFL HC to Florida Atlantic HC?

herodotus450

Nepotism coming home to roost?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Shades of Ernest Byner WOO!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That is nostalgic.

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Horatio Cornblower

That’s definitely not Earnest Byner.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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“I guess she likes what I brought.”

blaxabbath

So does Shady have enough pull to only sign with a contender?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

A contender with plenty of cap space, yes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

NC State’s head coach promised to shotgun a beer on the field, to encourage folks not to go to their cars at halftime. I’ve started to really like this guy!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Like, does that slide actually operate any other way?

blaxabbath

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

With all the anniversary stuff I forgot; let’s celebrate the moon landing with Buzz Aldrin punching a conspiracy theorist in the face.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Oh, controversy at Aston Villa! Or Crystal Palace! Whichever!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Man, that Ray Lewis cums joke would have been a lot better here, eh?

King Hippo

be pretty impressive if he could finish twice within the hour (at his age)

Horatio Cornblower

Ray Lewis can’t finish twice in that time, not necessarily because of his age, but because he has to flee the scene and burn all the evidence.

King Hippo

with apologies to rockingdog…

Chelski Chavs React Reasonably

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Pfft, so can my wife.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Kinda the point that we can mimic animal behavior.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Dorian up to 150 mph now.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s one fast portrait.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That’s what we wanted.

blaxabbath

And now South Carolina is in the path? That’s fucking awesome.

I mean…err….thoughts and prayers.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

So Google mixes the Brandon Marshall(s) up too.

litre_cola

Landed. Did I miss everything except Bk being Bulgarian, Norwich being a strip mall, and Balls losing his passport?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Balls had a successful date; artist conception below:

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

A “narf” to pay my respects.

blaxabbath

Tiffany Trump makes Andy Reid look like Mike McCoy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Some people overeat because of a childhood trau……. oh, yeah, got it.

King Hippo

F/M/K. Tiffany Trump, Meghan McCain, Andy Reid?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’d have to marry Andy, ’cause then I’d get free tickets. The other two are a toss up and by that I mean puking.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Marry Andy, of course, and die fat and happy. Kill McCain, because she contributes less than nothing to our society. F Tiffany by default.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I guess.

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Horatio Cornblower

This seems like the correct answer.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

But she’s had Trump in her.

blaxabbath

Kill Andy. Fuck Fat Tiffany. Marry Fat Meghan because I’d rather be her George Conway.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s very much a case of the pot calling the kettle “one of the blacks”.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That place went out of business after it was visited by one Ezra Reid in June of 1934.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Looking at the profile of the first nutjob on that list made me think about what it would be like to be stuck in some shithole in central Indiana or Illinois and it’s kind of amazing that there aren’t more mass shootings and suicides in those areas.

King Hippo

I now want to see a pre-season friendly between Scottish side Peterhead and FK Slutsk. Especially if there is talk of Slutsk getting stretched at the back.

King Hippo

YES! The NOBs make it four, so we can have a bukkake torneo.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Like anyone’s going to be Sitting Comfortably after a four hand shot to the nuts.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Mainz are now down 6-1 in Munchen. Good abstention after all.

scotchnaut

No Big Love for Paxton Lynch. He’s cut by the SeaTruthers.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

As it should be. He can get back to his video games now.

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King Hippo

of all the terrible QB attemps, QuarterPax >> even Tommy Maddox

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

At least Maddox had a good career at one point and was good in college.

Horatio Cornblower

Oh, Sheffield United with a slashing attack, knifing through the Chelsea defense and thrusting in a goal that stabs Chelsea in the heart!

Ray Lewis: /cums

scotchnaut

“Stabbed Thru The Heart In Chelsea” is the name of my one act play about the life of Nancy Spungen.

herodotus450

College football starts in an hour, but I want it NOW!

Horatio Cornblower

I’m assuming that Sheffield United is Ray Lewis’s favoUrite team in the EPL for…reasons.

King Hippo

game recognize game!

King Hippo

My late bet out of irritation at Manure (FK Slutsk) is up 2-0. And y’all don’t think they’s method to my madness. SO MUCH smgdh

King Hippo

In Belarus, Comrade! I bet them because I don’t approve of Slutsk shaming.

King Hippo

3-nil, going into half

scotchnaut

FC Slutsk are total TILF’s!*

*Team I’d Like To Fack

Fronkenshteen

Where’d Eden Hazard end up?

Horatio Cornblower

Real Madrid. Oh yeah, he’s still good:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NqIZOqfE7nM

scotchnaut

Timbuk 3, as always, has the answer-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Id2FyupZbIw

Fronkenshteen

west ham woo?

Fronkenshteen

WEST HAM WOOOO!!!

/Haller again!

King Hippo

good signing, that

Horatio Cornblower

Fun fact, I live about a half hour from the Connecticut town of Norwich, (it’s The Rose City they’ll have you know), and every time I see Norwich in the EPL my initial thought is “how the fuck does that failed mill town afford a soccer team?”

Senor Weaselo

But they have the Navigators! Do they still have the Navigators?

Horatio Cornblower

No, it’s the Connecticut Tigers now. Detroit’s Low A team in the now-wildly-inaccurately-named New York Penn League.

Great seats for $10 and a surprisingly decent beer selection.

scotchnaut

To no one’s surprise, Schefter is saying that Bills McCoy is getting the axe. Move rook Singletary up a bit. That is, if you dare draft a player from Buffalo.

King Hippo

don’t they still have the desiccated corpse of Frank Gore hanging around?

scotchnaut

Of all the 36 year-old rb’s in the league, he’s the best by far. Seriously, I can’t see him getting more than, what, maybe 120 carries?

King Hippo

you would think, but then again…BUFFALO

Horatio Cornblower

Jerry Jones will probably sign McCoy while cackling to himself that he’s really undercut Zeke with this astute football move.

King Hippo

Let’s go Team Knifey!

scotchnaut

If you read between the lines, it’s obvious that Balls had his passport taken away a few years ago.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I see that Dorian is up to 145 mph.

King Hippo

somebody told me this has Hugo potential. Fuck’s sake, I’m supposed to be driving to my fantasy auction Monday am.

bk109

I know, I had a business trip to Miami and Atlanta for early next week, but it got pushed for health and safety reasons…
Edit: If they give me the BBJ, I’m pretty sure we could be in and out tomorrow, but no one wants to risk it

bk109

the Boeing BJ, not the Kraft one (though for the record, I don’t find anything wrong in what he did) … if anything, I find it disgusting at how sensationalized the coverage was compared to an actual dirtbag like Jim “Why yes, I did in fact snort all of the drugs” Irsay, who ACTUALLY did bad shit

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The thing that bugged me so much about Handjob Bob’s thing is the refusal to accept consequences. I mean, while I don’t believe it should be, it is against the law, and I don’t like the message being sent that as long as you are rich and well-connected enough, there are literally ZERO consequences for committing crimes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You mean, how long have I lived in any country?

Horatio Cornblower

I will sacrifice any number of small woodland animals if that things hits Mar-a-Lago full force. Yes, I know it’s insured but my God, the visuals people, think of the goddamn visuals.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The downside to that is if it doesn’t, the cultists will insist that it was going to only God turned it aside at the last moment.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m awake, I’m awake. I intend to watch a lot of U.S. Open tennis today.

King Hippo

I appreciated those “English breakfast” pics on NBCSN. That’ll keep me off food today.

King Hippo

sommet for bk to ask the little wife: Ole makes it past Christmas. Discuss.

bk109

precisely why he’ll get shitcanned early, overcorrecting for last time, plus Mourinho had the “history” behind him, Ole has not…

King Hippo

also THE NERVE of him, supporting youth talent.

bk109

No need, she’s currently in my ear (the downside of BT headsets :D) demanding him basically get drawn and quartered… And claims that he’s a fuckup away from getting shitcanned

King Hippo

Mainz up a goal away to Bayern, because I ain’t bet them for once.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m grateful because of the extra time for GWS injuries to heal, but I wish AFL finals didn’t have a bye week right now.

King Hippo

It’s gonna be hard work, streaming my Wolven Sort against the scum from EZU, also streaming #BFIB doubleheader, watching various and sundry JV fixtures on the telly, and feeding my #HAILGAMBLOR addiction.

/but that why they pay me the BIG imaginary bucks

//also they’s no line on CSKA yet

bk109

Dude, don’t bet on Bulgarian football, up to like a couple of years ago you could actually find the stat lines WEEKS in advance (we’re talking number of corners, halftime results and the like)… Take it from me, I grew up in that alleged country 😀

King Hippo

but they ain’t gonna fix a match against the ARMY side with the terrifying ultras. THINK, man!! 😀

bk109

Ehm.. it’s the (historically) Army team (CSKA) against the (historically) Ministry of the Interiour (Cops, StateSec and the Like) … And how to put it politely, the games have lost their lustre the past decade plus… I should know, lol, I’ve got a free riot shield and a helmet after the Gendarmerie started attacking EVERYONE indiscriminately 😀 … Only thing you need to know is that basically both are mediocre now, with only Ludogorets being slightly better (and with a richer owner who quite coincidentally also controls the media rights for the whole league) 😀

herodotus450

So…. put my money on a draw?

bk109

CSKA are somewhat poorer this year, so … maybe Levski, but that money is better spent elsewhere :p

King Hippo

yeah, I know not to bet against Ludogorets!

/also, since you’re in the Clubhouse, does that make you a Vulgar Bulgar?

bk109

No, a Hangry Oirish, for I cured myself of my Bulgarian-ness 😉
Edit:Not kidding, btw. In fact, I still celebrate the day I relinquished my Bulgarian Citizenship each year… And yes, I make (not buy) cake!

King Hippo

yeah, send that cunt off!!

/I assure you, nothing to do with my wager, just trying to support Lesser Footy colleague Wakey 😀

bk109

Talk about Sophie’s choice there.. On one hand, I applaud any attempt to murder ManUre players on the field, on the other… if the bastards lose, wifey will be angrrrrrry, so instant-migraine…

King Hippo

it helps that maybe the worst imaginary person I “know” is a Saints supporter. And they generally are a bunch of Tory cunts, as I understand it.

bk109

That helps, I suppose… The problem is that on my end, wifey’s fandom is … overpowering 😀 (In fact it took basically zero bribing to get all 4 kids to accept futility, I mean Arsenal, as their team… Just because ManUre makes mommy angry and shouty 😀 )

Horatio Cornblower

Ooh, ooh, I know who that is!

It’s Otto, right?

King Hippo

This was true brilliance. Thanks, y’all.

rockingdog

found a funny:
daughter: can i keep the night light on?

me: and provide the monsters with a beacon to your location? use your head, sweetie

rockingdog

goooo chelsea!

litre_cola

No.

rockingdog

ok.

litre_cola

Agree to disagree.

bk109

… so you supporting Chelsea is a heredetary condition, or it’s just a fortuitous traumatic brain injury?

rockingdog
bk109

Mate, I’m stuck being a chaperone/designated adult, for a summer thing for my 4 kids AND a tonne of kids I’m not legally required to like, sarcasm AND hope are lost upon me (and will continue to be so up until 6PM GMT :D)
Edit: I think this SNL clip (and basically everything post Dark Age) pairs well with

https://youtu.be/DdCYMvaUcrA?t=27

litre_cola

Up at 3 for a plane. Beers with Game Time Decision this afternoon!

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