EXT. COUNTRY CLUB PATIO LOUNGE - DAY Three well-dressed gentlemen sit comfortably in chairs around a circular table. A splendid array of hors d'oeuvres sits in front of them. A waiter arrives with a tray of cocktails and sets them down. XAVIER: [takes a sip of his Vesper martini] Ah, bye week. HENDRICK:
Author: Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
The Circle: Prelude
INT. CORPORATE BOARDROOM - DAY A pair of corporate executives are seated in a conference room. FANDUEL MARKETING MANAGER: Wow, we sure have been taking some shots in the press lately! DRAFTKINGS JUNIOR VICE PRESIDENT: Yup. FANDUEL: I mean, we're staring down the barrel of an investigation by the district attorney. DRAFTKINGS: Yup. FANDUEL: I
American Jet
In American Jet, Rikki-Tikki-Deadly imaginatively explores the incomprehensible depths of madness and captures the insanity of violence in our time or any other. Fitzpatrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 2010s Manhattan. Young, bearded, and well-educated, Fitzpatrick earns his fortune in the NFL by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Fitzpatrick prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no
The Rikki-Tikki-Deadly Memorial “Duchess is Better at This” Weekly Awards
Sorry, I was pretty distracted during the games this week. My ex-girlfriend came over and we played around with dry ice. That is not as sexy as it sounds. Here are a few awards anyways. The Richie Incognito Award for Outstanding Achievement in Batsmanship: Seattle Seahawks linebacker K.J. Wright, who illegally
Meanwhile, in Detroit…(Part 2)
EXT. DOWNTOWN DETROIT, FINANCIAL DISTRICT - DAY A bullet-ridden car screeches to a stop in front of a glittering skyscraper. RQBOCOP emerges with purpose and strides to the front door of the building. LUKE JOECKEL: [holds open door, ushers RQBOCOP through] Go right on in, sir. RQBOCOP enters the lobby and looks at
The Rikki-Tikki-Deadly Memorial “You Couldn’t Even Think of Nine?” Weekly Awards
Well, another week is in the books, and since Duchess won't be able to put together the Nine Circles of Leasts this week, I thought I'd throw together some awards for some last weekend's most entertaining performances. The Calvin Johnson Memorial "That's the Dumbest Fucking Rule Ever" Award: Tyler Eifert. Despite clearly
DFO Insider: Behind the Scenes
Meanwhile, in Detroit…(Part 1)
In September of 2015, the U.S. Justice System declared the NFL's disciplary efforts were in violation of due process laws. In the wake of this historic decision, the league found itself unable to enforce discipline amongst its players. The NFL attempted to force all disciplinary procedures to be settled through arbitration,
Practice Makes Perfect
Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.
Oakland Raiders Sign Feckless Drunk for Unspecified Number of Bottles of Beer on the Wall
A Dog’s Breakfast: The 2015 Atlanta Falcons Season Preview
INT. GEORGIA DOME - DAY Astonishingly handsome anchor steps into camera frame. RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Hi folks, it's Rikki-Tikki-Deadly here, and I'm reporting LIVE from the Georgia Dome. It is absolutely thunderous in here...[presses finger to earpiece] Hey, Angela? PRODUCER: [inaudible] RTD: Yeah...it's too much. Can you get them to turn it down? PRODUCER: [inaudible] RTD: I don't
