I'm not sure why this team has fallen to me to preview over the years. Rikki covered them in the initial year of the site, and I think did a damn fine job half-assing it. Me - well, I didn't even muster half of that half-ass when I did the
It's very quiet, what with everyone travelling to Dallas & not wanting to tip hands ahead of Thursday night.
The John Lynch standard: don't hit women. As opposed to the "see if they're cops first" maxim followed by his teammate Warren Sapp.
Trying not to interfere in the case,
Well, when I started this, I had them pegged at 4-0. Then they shit the bed versus the Bills and I had to retype my intro. THESE FUCKERS JUST KEEP LETTING ME DOWN!
Coming off their bye this week, they host the Jay Cutler distracted Miami Dolphins, which should be an
They know what they did.
I hope Dan Quinn wakes up screaming every night at 3:28 AM, sweating in anguish over how the Falcons let down 96% of the football viewing public, with Dreamboat's stupid, ugly face as large as Godzilla standing over him, roaring in triumph. After all, TAWMMY's
I've said it before, and I'll say it again:
No, wait - that's not it.
That's the ticket.
It really is a delightful story, one of the few to come out of this somewhat disastrous 2016 season. The Atlanta Falcons, a team most pundits predicted would finish around 8-8, have surpassed all expectations
Today's topic - the Atlanta Falcons.
(posted with permission)
It's been my curse to have to follow the Falcons for DFO this year. Since I volunteered to do their season preview and their bye week update, they have done their utmost to ensure it has been a royal pain-in-my-ass to do so.
First of all, let's kick this mother off right:
The Falcons are 6-4 and on their bye this weekend. Let that sink in for a moment - the Falcons, a team that last year started 5-0 and then promptly decided that competency was for losers. The Falcons, whose one shining moment was
Because I'm sensible (and also busy on Thursday nights) I didn't watch the Jags-Titans game last night. But I did see some highlights this morning, and woof. Man, these Color Rush uniforms are just god-awful, and especially so for Jacksonville. Do you think it's some elaborate game that Nike's playing
INT. GEORGIA DOME - DAY
Astonishingly handsome anchor steps into camera frame.
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Hi folks, it's Rikki-Tikki-Deadly here, and I'm reporting LIVE from the Georgia Dome. It is absolutely thunderous in here...[presses finger to earpiece] Hey, Angela?
RTD: Yeah...it's too much. Can you get them to turn it down?
RTD: I don't