Poink! Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 30, 2023May 30, 2023

I killed a man today. I didn't mean to. Well, that's not quite accurate. I meant to do him grievous bodily harm; to paraphrase blues legend R.L. Burnside, him dying was between him and the Lord.* But I sure wasn't too broken up about his mortal coil choosing to shuffle off a bit

Shtupping the Light Fantastic! Tuesday Open Thread

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 23, 2023May 23, 2023

Ever get so mentally exhausted that you have to make a conscious effort to blink? And then after a while, that feels like too much effort? I shan't belabor the point. It's better than the alternative, when you don't have enough to think about and your brain starts chewing on itself

Monkey! Tuesday Open Thread

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 16, 2023May 16, 2023

What is up, party persons? Reverend Mayhem here for Budweiser beer. When I sit down in my recliner after a long day at work, the last thing I want is an alcoholic beverage filled with nuance and complexity to stimulate my tastebuds and brain. After all, why am I drinking

Boozles! Tuesday Open Thread

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 9, 2023May 9, 2023

Well shit. We've hit The Doldrums of summer sports early this year. We are in extremis, and our only choice is to eat the men. "But wait, we're in the middle of the playoffs for hockey and basketball!" I hear you bleat, like the pitiful sheeple you are. Yes, technically there are a

Afterglow or Aftermath? Tuesday Open Thread

DFOing Good

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 2, 2023May 2, 2023

108

Good evening, sir and/or madam. I'm sorry to interrupt you on such a beautiful Spring night, but have you heard the Good News of Kaylon Nakia "Poona" Ford Jr.? 5'11, 315+ pounds of Sheer Fireplug Grit. Look at that monster. But a jolly monster. The kind of monster who is friendly

ABSOLUTE SCENES! Tuesday Open Thread

DFOing Good

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 25, 2023April 25, 2023

Hello, you beautiful reprobates! It is I, your beloved spiritual-leader-cum-figurehead-for-social-control! It's almost draft time, and when you open any sports website or (god forbid) turn on ESPN, you can feel the crackling tension build from the Draft Industrial Complex. Draftniks face pressure on so many fronts at this point: 1. Editorial pressure

Final Four for the Final Four: A Recursive Sunday Night Thread

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - March 26, 2023March 26, 2023

Now pinch hitting...for DonT... Reverend Mayhem. Mayhem. Hi kids! Long time no bore-you-with-overly-twee-prose! It's perhaps the best time of the sporting year (Non-Football Division) for your average North American fan. Pro basketball and hockey are in the last sprint for the playoffs, so at least half the teams have Hope. F1 is still

Medical Miracles and Plague Pits: Tuesday Open Thread

DFOing Good

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - September 20, 2022September 20, 2022

Well that was a wild NFL week, wasn't it? I even had to learn some new HippoSpeak to process our beloved Thing He Sent Us. The biggest "news" today is that Cole Beasley, anti-vaxx hero and utter dumbshit, is apparently taking his 'talents' to...uh...Not South Beach. Typhoid Beasley will head to

What We Drank Last Night: Someone Wet My Pants (and Tuesday Open Thread)

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - September 13, 2022September 13, 2022

Welcome again to What We Drank Last Night. In-depth beer, wine and liquor reviews are great, but the average North American has neither the time nor the attention span for "notes of smoked blueberry" and "nuances of toast." WWDLN aims to fill the void of when your at the liquor

Can I Get an Amen!?!: 2022 Buffalo Bills Preview and Tuesday Open Thread

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - September 6, 2022September 6, 2022

2021 PREDICTION: 13-4, AFC Champions 2021 REALITY: 11-6, Divisional Round loss in an instant classic It is dark times for the Buffalo Bills faithful. It's not just Eric from Lackawanna putting his injury settlement on the line picking them to go to the Super Bowl. It's everyone. The Bills are currently 7:2

Rum, Simile and the Lash: MAS*H Edition (and Tuesday Open Thread)

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - August 23, 2022

Casualties! That is the word of the day in the NFL. It's Roster Cut-Down Day (Part II), and in an effort to trim their bloated training camp rosters to a slim-and-trim 80 players per team, we've had a spate of cuts and injury designations. As this is only Part II, there

Rum, Simile and the Lash: The FBI Raided My Snack Drawer (and Tuesday Open Thread)

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - August 9, 2022August 9, 2022

I'm hesitant to write this now (late Monday night) because by the time this posts, some Weird Shit will probably have happened and people will be like "Why aren't you talking about the secret DeflateGate video they found in Donald Trump's underwear drawer?" But needs must when the Devil drives, and