TURDSDAY NIGHT FOOT FETISH

Well, here it is. Our favorite greatest coach ever gets his shot as the new(ish) head man of the Buffalo Bills. The Bills visit Met Life Stadium at 4-4 (2-1) against a surprisingly competent Jets team, who is 5-3 (3-1). I’m not sure I’m comfortable with living in a world where the Jets aren’t hilariously DERPy, but it appears that might be the case.

There’s been a bazillion and nine things already written about this, so I won’t really say too much. I think this game could be entertaining and fun. The Jets, behind Fitzpatrick (insert HAHHVAHHD joke here) and Chris Ivory have managed to move the ball well (and score lots of fantasy points for me in Sill’s Insanity League). Their defense is real. Todd Bowles deserves a lot of credit for having this team actually doing things right. The Bills haven’t been necessarily terrific, and when the lose, they fucking lose. That hasn’t stopped Bills fans from continuing to be the most insane fanbase in the NFL. When did this happen, by the way? Every week, Deadspin has another article on Monday, showcasing continued crezzy behavior from Bills fans. Is this something I was just never aware of? Philadelphia fans, Oakland fans, Washington fans? Yeah, we know those people are fucking nuts. But, Buffalo? Okay, sure, I guess?

Anyway, while it should be a fun and entertaining AFC East game-for-who-gets-finish-not-quite-as-far-behind-New-England, it’s still a Thursday night game, so it will be just terrible. It’s what we deserve. At least Buffalo still has pride!

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*Credit to Commentist Entrophy for that magnificent which absolutely deserves more recognition.

Additionally, in the JV footed ball, we have the Battle of the Techs, which is one the most ACC-things possible on the TWWL. The Virginia Tech Castrated Turkeys travel to Atlanta to play the Georgia Tech Yellowjackets. Normally, I love college football night games. Hell, I make time for weekly #MACtion. But, seriously, fuck this game. Fuck Virginia Tech. Fuck Frank Beamer and his weird neck growth. I can’t really say anything about Georgia Tech. They’re a big letdown from last year, I guess? Who cares. The ACC is the AFC South of college football. For some reason, people think they deserve a spot at the big-boy table.

There’s probably hawkey and NBA on somewhere, too.

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Senor Weaselo

Hooray, we’re a quarter of the way through this shitshow!

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Only a quarter? I really have to reevaluate my life decisions.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Recovery Whiskey

Just the tip

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

They are trying to make me kill myself, aren’t they?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

BARELY HOLDING ON THE TEAM’S GREATEST EMBARRASSMENT

Sill Bimmons

BLEERGH MUST NOT BE TEMPTED

Doktor Zymm

Guys, I think there’s a problem with the M&Ms on the TV. They should look like this :
http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/christmas_m-ms_5132.jpg

Where are the Ms? Why are they moving so much? How distasteful would it be to make this into a racist joke about candy coated chocolate?

Senor Weaselo

Damn, now I want M&Ms.

Recovery Whiskey

So which ones Taylor?

Gratliff

Holy shit. Kalisto went over Ryback with a top rope Salida Del Sol in the championship tournament. Mood instantly improved.

Sill Bimmons

comment image

Recovery Whiskey

This game is like the Republican debate between Jindal and Santorum.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am red-green colorblind, normally that means nothing and I see colors fine. The exact shades of red and green they chose on a green field, on the wide shots they all look the same

entropy

The easiest way to tell them apart is the Jets suck, the Bills blow. Hope this has helped.

Recovery Whiskey

How can you survive in the wild? Identify green eggs and ham?

Smithchez

I’m sure the NFL loves you saying the uniforms give you a headache, PHEEEL

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

Holy shit, I just got home, logged on, and saw the highest honor you guys can bestow, short of calling me a prick and telling me to go fuck myself. Thanks for using my drunken scribble as a post image.

Seriously, thank you.

This game, however, looks worse than my scribble. Onward to drinking!

Senor Weaselo

WOO DRINKING! And congratulations.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

FUCK YO SCRIBBLE! THE CRIMSON SCOURGE WILL TRIUMPH!

entropy

These uniforms are fucking awful. It’s like a fucking kindergartner lost all his other colors and just said, “fuck it, I’m going with red and green.”

THE CRIMSON SCOURGE WILL NEVER DEFEAT THE KELLEY GREEN HEROES!!!

Beastmode Ate My Baby

WOO DRUNKEN SCRIBBLING YEAH!

entropy

There it is!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

If you need someone to call you a prick and tell you to go fuck yourself I am always on board for that

entropy

There are billboards around town that keep me humble that way.

bourb0nblues

BOO POINTS

blordinaryfagicmox
Sill Bimmons

haha jest

Smithchez

The ref performance so far is on par with that of the teams on the field.

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

It’s nice to know everyone is on board with the “stop the offense at all costs” plan.

Redshirt

Come on, turnover. I want a 0-0 tie!

The old Lull em to sleep then pounce offense.

Sill Bimmons

Ofence?

Yes after five series the greatest gaining play is a pass to a FB…and then that screen happened.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Way to fuck up Puntathon 2015, refs.

bourb0nblues

NAWT EVEN CLOSE PHEEEL

Senor Weaselo

After reviewing the play, both teams forfeit and the Patriots will be credited a win.

Sill Bimmons

Dumb challenge PedoRex.

Smithchez

Womp womp, Rex.

blordinaryfagicmox

comment image

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I turned on the game finally instead of just streaming because a game and 2 liveblogs was hard to navigate. My nfl network is static filled. Soundwise, picture is perfect

Redshirt

This game makes me want me to watch my favorite video game character get killed by Astro Boy on Death Battle.

HOW DID MEGA MAN RUN OUT OF METAL BLADES?! ITS IMPOSSIBLE!

King Hippo

THE SPIRIT OF LOVIE COMPELS YOU!!

the winner will he determined by whichever defense gives up the least net yards.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

BOOO! SHITTY SPOT

Smithchez

That’s right, Eric. Make no attempt to stretch for the first down.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“You’re an embarrassment to Eriks everywhere!”

– Magneto

http://www.geeksandcleats.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/erik-lescher-x-men-nazi-scene.jpg

Sill Bimmons

A DFO DIVIDED AGAINST ITSELF CANNOT STAND

Gratliff

Puntkakke, Ryback match, or re-watching the new Super Smash Bros trailer?

Senor Weaselo

Could be worse, could be black into gold.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I hope Balls of Steel finds a way to work that into his Bedtime Stories saga.

blordinaryfagicmox

Two threads?
comment image

This will feature 3 hours of commercials isn’t?

MOAR TIME TO DRANK

Smithchez

Night of a thousand punts! How the fuck you doin, boys?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

GETTIN OUR DRANK ON! THE CRIMSON SCOURGE! WOOOOOOO

Old School Zero

I’m really into men

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

GIVE ‘M THA FOOT!

blackroseMD1

This game is going to end 3-2 isn’t it?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Well that’s a shame, we’re down to an expected punt total of 40.

Sill Bimmons

I DO NOT LIKE MULTITASKING LIKE THIS

Old School Zero

HOW THE FUCK

Senor Weaselo

First… down?

blordinaryfagicmox

These jerseys?
comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Still on pace for those 60 punts…