Well, here it is. Our favorite greatest coach ever gets his shot as the new(ish) head man of the Buffalo Bills. The Bills visit Met Life Stadium at 4-4 (2-1) against a surprisingly competent Jets team, who is 5-3 (3-1). I’m not sure I’m comfortable with living in a world where the Jets aren’t hilariously DERPy, but it appears that might be the case.
There’s been a bazillion and nine things already written about this, so I won’t really say too much. I think this game could be entertaining and fun. The Jets, behind Fitzpatrick (insert HAHHVAHHD joke here) and Chris Ivory have managed to move the ball well (and score lots of fantasy points for me in Sill’s Insanity League). Their defense is real. Todd Bowles deserves a lot of credit for having this team actually doing things right. The Bills haven’t been necessarily terrific, and when the lose, they fucking lose. That hasn’t stopped Bills fans from continuing to be the most insane fanbase in the NFL. When did this happen, by the way? Every week, Deadspin has another article on Monday, showcasing continued crezzy behavior from Bills fans. Is this something I was just never aware of? Philadelphia fans, Oakland fans, Washington fans? Yeah, we know those people are fucking nuts. But, Buffalo? Okay, sure, I guess?
Anyway, while it should be a fun and entertaining AFC East game-for-who-gets-finish-not-quite-as-far-behind-New-England, it’s still a Thursday night game, so it will be just terrible. It’s what we deserve. At least Buffalo still has pride!
*Credit to Commentist Entrophy for that magnificent which absolutely deserves more recognition.
Additionally, in the JV footed ball, we have the Battle of the Techs, which is one the most ACC-things possible on the TWWL. The Virginia Tech Castrated Turkeys travel to Atlanta to play the Georgia Tech Yellowjackets. Normally, I love college football night games. Hell, I make time for weekly #MACtion. But, seriously, fuck this game. Fuck Virginia Tech. Fuck Frank Beamer and his weird neck growth. I can’t really say anything about Georgia Tech. They’re a big letdown from last year, I guess? Who cares. The ACC is the AFC South of college football. For some reason, people think they deserve a spot at the big-boy table.
There’s probably hawkey and NBA on somewhere, too.
At least only FUCKING EIGHT OF YOU had a chance to tackle him.
Yes, but it is the Jets.
thank Jeebus we have a whole ‘nuther half of this to look forward to
Things I never thought I’d say:
I am so, so glad I don’t have whiskey right now.
I’ll drink one more for you. Also because I want one more.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/29cafd889ee75ef6dcf01441a927a438/tumblr_nvwytsgExo1uecilno1_500.gif
http://www.candywarehouse.com/assets/item/large/red-and-green-haribo-gummi-bears-132884-im.jpg
This is either a neutral zone violation, or they’re confused about which side to line up on.
Gummi Bears have a reputation for being uncoachable.
http://osiprodeaodcspstoa01.blob.core.windows.net/en-us/media/f951cbcd-1647-4e68-bb18-86798d5c88b4.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rM0r8FcFLqc
http://49.media.tumblr.com/787044f3c66e5ec8a6fb7c54c2fe561d/tumblr_nmp9wobyBS1qf5do9o1_400.gif
I’ll never drop acid at Grandmas again
Greg Roman was the focal point of Niners fans hate
Interesting, I would have thought San Francisco residents would be more supportive of Roman’s offensive indulgences.
LIKE IT’S YOUR PRIVATE PRE-SCREENED SKANK PARTY, LESEAN!
http://www.writeups.org/img/fiche/618.jpg
http://33.media.tumblr.com/183b74e99e01e974b19f76ca8b6bf1e2/tumblr_nwvz8dVTvK1tdhimpo1_500.gif
http://38.media.tumblr.com/63e7e8547ed81d57f13ed6b6d51f4cb4/tumblr_nwvz8dVTvK1tdhimpo3_540.gif
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I think I was twelve when I invented the artificial dog heart.
That’s a University Of Pittsburgh product right there.
GASH THOSE GASHES!
The Bills bench engaging in some timely counted cross-stich
http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/18300000/Eliza-Coupe-happy-endings-18391641-1534-2048.jpg
Who is she?
Everyone shame Sill
Eliza Coupe btw
http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/elizacoupe.gif
Is that Clara with blonde hair?
Why even bother with punt returns? Just give the receiving team the ball ten years behind the spot of the catch because EVERYONE fucks up on punting special teams.
They certainly are setting the game back ten yeara
At the very least, change “illegal block in the back” to “illegal block in the ass” so we can all have a giggle.
Wait, what?
FUCK YO COUCH, BOWLES
Hasn’t that couch been through enough already?
http://media.giphy.com/media/DOb3rFL6d83Zu/giphy.gif
Commercials, refs, and announcers, what do they have in common?
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/webdr06/2013/6/28/20/anigif_enhanced-buzz-5648-1372464749-3.gif
Bukkake?
This game is making me identify with another version of Max
JESSE PINKMAN HAWKIN MOBILE DATA THE ONLY THING MOAR ADDICTIVE THAN METH
I’m sure there’s no possible way Rex will come to regret being out of challenges before halftime.
Lovie Smith doesn’t think so.
Is it me or does the Geico Gecko’s voice sound different?
No, you’re absolutely right. Same with the Honey Nut Cheerios bee.
Sounds like a new actor
This game, where challenges for a 7 yard completion in the 2nd quarter are legitimately useful.
Wow, how the fuck you miss THAT??
http://www.zentaifancydress.com/images/Zentai/Full-Body-Red-And-Green-Fancy-Dress-Lycra-Spandex-Zentai-Christmas-Elf-Suit.jpg
Holy shit. That is VILE.
It’s like if a psychopath did a half and half jersey for this game.
Holy shit thats amazing and horrid.
Nopenopenope
haley’d
Remember when Veterans’ Day was Armistice Day, and actually stood for an event rather than being a jingoistic fetishization of all things military in order to feed the ever-growing MIC?
you old bro
You going all Breakfast of Champions on us?
I’m pushing 40 and I can’t remember anything that didn’t push the ever-growing MIC
There was a time of reflection after Viet Nam, when there were some people that went, “Hey, maybe we shouldn’t be mindlessly building a military for no reason.”
Then, Reagan.
I feel like a special teams play was the only way a touchdown could be scored in this game
There will also be a pick six at some point.
The Jets replace one fumble machine with another. LET’S SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!!
If I ever need to explain “The Aristocrats” joke to someone who doesn’t speak any English, I’m just going to show them a tape of this game.
I really do wonder what it’s like to behold the wonders of the universe and think that it was made by a space daddy in six days 6000 years ago.
I figure it’s like watching an episode of “Star Trek” after somebody whacks you in the temple with a rubber mallet.
Not sure which team wants to lose the most, but I truly appreciate the effort.
Why was he kicking from the hashmark?
IT’S 9-3 YOU IDIOIT!!!
JESUS THE INCOMPETENCE IS CONTAGIOUS.
http://33.media.tumblr.com/167eb70c1d3674840d07e068c34f112c/tumblr_nmrbxidBwc1qf5do9o1_400.gif
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lO8blq8i3L4
Pussy v. Cock: WHO YA GOT?!?!
LOLBills
“Special” Teams
At least it was a different Smith turning it over, Jets fans.
We’re spoiled for choices in that department.
He’s trying to live up to that Stephen Hill Jets-WR-drafted-in-the-2nd-round hype.
that was a fumble
BILLS ST WOO
http://lovelace-media.imgix.net/uploads/269/a77acaf0-e237-0131-bff0-0eb233c768fb.gif?
That was a nice shot of that cheerleader walking back from a pee break before the kick.
As far as I’m concerned nothing happened after.
I’m gonna need fresh underwear
DERPdown
Goddammit.
Well, fuck.
Jets. /takes a bow