Sundays With Litre, Now with Less Litre!

Your illustrious host for the Sunday evening Open Thread is in Toronto this weekend for the Canada-Jamaica World Cup Qualifier game.

This is important for two reasons:

  1. Canada needs just one point to qualify for the World Cup for the first time since the 80’s
  2. Litre has been running a Twitter account posing as Canadian goalkeeper Milan Borjan’s pants. It should be noted that Borjan famously plays in sweat pants instead of shorts. The Twitter handle is Borjan Pants. Well, Mr. Borjan is aware of it and likes it so much that he sent Litre a pair of pants and has made arrangements to meet Litre at the game!! Please see below:

So, if everything goes to plan, Litre will be good and drunk with members of the Canadian National Team celebrating Canada’s qualification by the time you read this.

All I have to say is that I’m looking forward to the Boots On The Ground post!

UPDATE: CANADIA WINS IN A ROUT! LITRE IS DRUNK AF!

***

The NCAA tourney continues even though all of our brackets are trash. In the DFO contest, Señor Weaselo has a commanding lead and should take this baby.

On the Women’s side, Litre has the lead with 690 points (The Mighty 690!) with Game Time Decision right on his heels with 680 and me with 650 and Spam & teh Hippo tied at 640. All our potential champions are still in play so it’s still up for grabs!

***

Your sports choices tonight are USA-Panama or Honduras-México. Other than that, all you’ve got for entertainment is what we used to call The Gay Super Bowl (The Oscars).

Not sure if it’s PC to call it that anymore, but I think it’s appropriate. It’s like the Super Bowl in many important ways:

  • No real people can attend the actual event.
  • People host parties to watch it.
  • The people at these parties typically have not seen anything related to the show. ( Don’t watch football = Haven’t seen the nominated movies)
  • They’re all distracted by other things (Super Bowl commercials = Red Carpet Fashion)
  • People can and do gamble on the outcome.
  • No one from Cincinnati ever wins.
  • At the end of the night, we always wonder why we bothered to watch again this year.

I myself have not seen a movie in the theater since COVID started. Rikki probably has friends that have been in some of the nominated films but got cut out at the last minute. At least they still get paid.

Spam set up a DFO Oscars pool on ESPN. Here is the link if you want a Gently-Used Fleshlight:

https://fantasy.espn.com/games/oscars-pickem-2022/group?id=73cbf8d8-ae9a-47ac-bebe-2ab99fc21891&joining=true

That’s all I’ve got. Have at it in the comments.

5 4 votes
Article Rating
ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
Subscribe
Notify of
302 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Horatio Cornblower

Shit, I guess that was real.

Good for Will. Chris Rock has become increasingly unlikable.

Horatio Cornblower

I started watching ‘Summer of Soul’ a couple of nights ago, but it was at about 1:00 am, so I didn’t get far. I do need to get back and finish that.

The perils of streaming, I guess.

makeitsnowondem

Spam, how did you do this? I have watched every movie and not come close.

SonOfSpam

I saw 10 minutes of Dune and the asteroid movie. Probably helped.

Horatio Cornblower

Did they just beep out an entire exchange with Chris Rock and Will Smith, or did I walk in at the wrong time?

If there were two good actors involved it would’ve been clearer, but one of them was Chris Rock, so that isn’t the case.

yeah right

He clearly said “Leave my wife out of your shit.” He was angry for real. Trust me he’s not that good of an actor.

makeitsnowondem

No, this was a bit. I absolutely don’t believe it.

SonOfSpam

Maybe? Looked like an actual thing.

makeitsnowondem

The camera angle on the “punch” says to me it was planned but it might have been a bit that Rock went a little too far on.

Horatio Cornblower

See below. I kind of believe it, but wasn’t paying enough attention.

SonOfSpam

I think Will Smith actually just hit Chris Rock.

yeah right

He did! Tried to knock the motherfucker out!

SonOfSpam

Goes to show…it is HARD to knock someone out. Or old Will just can’t throw a punch.

SonOfSpam

Oh, it was open-handed. A slap, like that one show where a kid got slapped and it resulted in a really funny Tweet.

Dunstan

Alright, back at the Fortress of Dunstantude, and ready to hit the patio for a cigar. I guess I should let Spam predict my beverage. I haven’t actually decided yet, but I gather he’s on a roll.

makeitsnowondem

I’ve never seen anyone do this well this deep into the program.

yeah right

Not sure what they’re doing with the top 5 fan favorite thing that they’ve shown twice to a very lukewarm reaction from the live crowd.

makeitsnowondem

It’s for casuals. I don’t know why they’re doing anything for casuals.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Don’t forget to celebrate that Sharky finally got a pick correct

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I assumed it was Sill

SonOfSpam

I’m Bizarro Sharkbait

WCS

Stop. With. The. Music. Acts.

makeitsnowondem

If they hadn’t performed “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” there would have been riots.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

But not effective riots

SonOfSpam

I did…stuff with John Travolta. Anything to win the gently-used goodness.

Also, gonna miss the next one. For some reason I picked Belfast for screenplay, but I feel like that stupid Haim girl movie’s gonna win. Picking Belfast is gonna case me some troubles.

Horatio Cornblower

“Picking Belfast is gonna case me some troubles.”

Eammon de Valera, 1916

makeitsnowondem

Jenny Bevan should be in the Movies Hall of Fame. Muhammad Ali-level talent.

makeitsnowondem

The Long Goodbye is harrowing.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s why I prefer the Irish goodbye.

yeah right

The Chandler book? Fucking loved it.

rockingdog

Last funny;

(Interview to be a hot dog vendor at a baseball park)
INTERVIEWER: how loud can you yell ‘hot dogs’?
ME: (eyes go completely black) HOT DOGS

yeah right

Could have easily gone without the country for the record.

Horatio Cornblower

Oh that’s good.

SonOfSpam

“My wife calls her vagina ‘Gobi’ probably because that was her college roommate or something.”

The Maestro

That is a nuclear burn on ol’ BS there.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I had to look it up but it was worth it.

Horatio Cornblower

I need to see ‘Coda’

This acceptance speech alone is very moving.

I dare the Academy to cut this guy off.

makeitsnowondem

We just watched it earlier today and it’s so goddamned good.

yeah right

That was fucking amazing. In tears over here.

Horatio Cornblower

My daughter is taking a class in ASL, so I imagine we’ll be watching it soon.

SonOfSpam

How would he know if they did?

Horatio Cornblower

I just thought of that as I hit reply.

“Play the music as loud as you want, assholes; I’m gonna keep right on signing!”

rockingdog

I saw it
It was pretty rocking

Brick Meathook

Down the street from me, early this morning:

comment image

makeitsnowondem

Gentlemen.

Horatio Cornblower

Wrong place, fucko.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Look who’s come to brag about their Oscar picks….

DID YOU BRING THE MSPAINT ART!?!?!

yeah right

Always a pleasure good sir.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I look forward to fading quickly

yeah right

Yeah that one for one thing was my only win.

makeitsnowondem

I’m not in the game but I’m now 5-2.

yeah right

I knew you were all over that. It was pretty cool.

SonOfSpam

I think I’ve said “C*ntmeg” before when Ms Whitman was running for governor.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do purple people get a tax break?

King Hippo

and DUE THERE LIVES MATTER smh

yeah right

One for one! Shit I’mma break out the cabernet now.

yeah right

And now the 2nd and last event of the year that I watch live and in real time.
Growing up Ma and I were all over the movie action and I’ve been watching ever since.

yeah right

Mute button at the ready of course.

yeah right

She was good.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That gws – richo game, woof

rockingdog

LOL another Penalty kick for USA???
Hahaha
Yea it’s over for Panama
4-0

rockingdog

Hahaha wooooofff
USA goalie almost gave panama one…
Yikes 😬

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Zack Steffen with a nice David “Calamity” James impression just there.

rockingdog

BOOM Boom BoooMMm
3-0 USAAAaAaaa!!!
Hahaha it’s Rockingggg!!!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Paging @rockingdog…

rockingdog

Make it 2-0!!!!
Yooooooo!!!
USA are Rockingggg!!!! 💯

Last edited 2 years ago by rockingdog
rockingdog

Boooom
Pulisic put it in!!!!
USA 1-0

That’s Rocking!!! 💯

WCS

That escalated quickly.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t have any friends that have been in Oscar-nominated films since the live-action Lion King (a friend did one of the hyena voices). I do have a neighbor who was nominated himself, for writing Chocolat.

rockingdog

And it goes to VAR….
Oh my…
Penalty kick???

Last edited 2 years ago by rockingdog
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Penalty kick, eh?

comment image

King Hippo

It’s uncanny how many times I run through in my head the disgraced Louis CK’s “optimistic” is a just a nicer word for “stupid” bit.

Well, maybe something nice will happen. Why the FUCK would anything nice ever happen??

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The worst part about what Louis C.K. did is that now I can’t enjoy his comedy anymore.

Wait, no. That’s the second-worst part.

rockingdog

USA vs Panama
Looks like the crowd is Rockinggggggg

yeah right

I’ve seen about half of this years nominated movies. Last year was a lot easier to stream them all but there’s that in theater dynamic this year and many of this years films aren’t available to stream..
Most years I’ve seen all of the best picture nominations and most everything else.

Still not ready to sit in a theater with strangers yet.

Coda will probably win based on the “Feel good” factor.
I loved West Side Story and Spielberg may get director.
Being the Ricardos was really fun and JK Simmons was fantastic as Fred Mertz.

That’s all I’ve got this year.

yeah right

Oh, Nightmare Alley was fantastic but not exactly Academy material.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m irritated that The Green Knight didn’t get nominated for anything. Oh well, maybe the upcoming sequel The Grey Knight will get more recognition. I hear Ben Roethlisberger is attached as the lead.

litre_cola

That was insane. I have no voice. Been drinking for 3 days straight.

King Hippo

Don’t let the post-nap shakes stop you. Can’t have Canadia thinking youse a pussy or sommet.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[runs through clubhouse with a scrap of sweatpants material wrapped around his wing-wang] – liter_cola

The Maestro

I have the biggest fucking boner right now.

Doktor Zymm

Why stop now? Welcome!

Don T

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

I’ve seen Dune and Power of the Dog this year. Based on this I like Power of the Dog to win Best Picture, Best Actor (Cumberbatch), Best Supporting Actress, (Kirsten Dunst), and best cinematography. I expect to win Best Screenplay Adaptation From a 60-Year-Old Novel, Best Remake Of A Very Confusing Movie Starring That Guy From Twin Peaks, and Best Supporting Actor, (Sandworm #3)

TheRevanchist

Dune was… not really a disappointment. Or good. And the casting was questionable. CGI was a little too much at times.

Well, maybe Dune was a disappointment.

Horatio Cornblower

I liked it. I’m not sure it screams ‘Best Picture’, but I thought it was a good flick.

Dunstan

I thought Dune was fine but not great. Well-shot and performed, but some poor choices in what they chose to focus on from the story. Pretty much all the great political stuff from the book got cut out so they could give us a standard-issue Chosen One narrative.

Which, knowing me, will mean the Academy will give it Best Adapted Screenplay or whatever.

rockingdog

Found a funny;

for years my dad has argued that what the world needs is “the travel taco” i.e. a taco with sealed edges to keep all the filling from falling out while you’re on the move. and for years my mom has patiently explained the concept of burritos.

Game Time Decision

I read that thread today. Very funny

Horatio Cornblower

That thread was both funny and heartwarming. I was a nice break from all the cynicism, and I hope that guy achieves his dreams.

Last edited 2 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
scotchnaut

“Canada gets to its first World Cup since ’86? I haven’t felt this good since 1983!”

-Winston Smith

King Hippo

see also: every NC State supporter

/Hippo was 9

Redshirt

(yawns) That was a nice nap. Let’s see how #15 Saint Peter’s is doing.

…oh

King Hippo

On the bright side, at no point in time was I suckered into turning the teevee on. Basketball is the worst of all sportsball.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I feel like this clip sums up the game perfectly. It would have been awesome as hell if he (they) pulled it off, but they came up short. Way, way short.

https://mobile.twitter.com/CBSSports/status/1508200522611781633

1 2 3