The Lady of the Sea of Sin: Part 5

ballsofsteelandfury - June 8, 2022June 7, 2022

Editor’s Note: Please click here for Part 1, here for Part 2, here for Part 3, and here for Part 4. I smiled as I turned around. "What the fuck is the...." The punch hit me like a ton of bricks and took all the air out of me. Some of the Buford might have come out the

The Lady of the Sea of Sin: Part 4

ballsofsteelandfury - June 1, 2022May 31, 2022

Editor’s Note: Please click here for Part 1, here for Part 2, and here for Part 3. "You weren't kidding about those protein bars!" Claudia laughed when she said this, but I could tell she really wasn't amused. It had been a bad night of no sleep, lies, and unspeakably awful farts. Once the

The Lady of the Sea of Sin: Part 3

ballsofsteelandfury - May 25, 2022May 23, 2022

Editor's Note: Please click here for Part 1 and here for Part 2. Mexicali is a LOT different from TJ. For starters, at the border in TJ, they enthusiastically wave you in. If you look carefully, you can see them mouth the words, "Spend your money!" At the border

The Lady of the Sea of Sin: Part 2

ballsofsteelandfury - May 18, 2022May 11, 2022

Editor's note: Read Part 1 here. The asphalt radiated heat back up my thighs as I walked back to my car. It was getting hotter by the minute and I needed to get the hell out of Palm Springs. Rölf's story spoiled what was an otherwise lovely brunch. Fuck

The Lady of the Sea of Sin: Part 1

ballsofsteelandfury - May 10, 2022May 8, 2022

The speedometer showed 80 as I shifted into 4th. I carefully calculated the space and angles and then quickly crossed three lanes to the right and back to the left again. As I suspected would happen, the red car got stuck behind the minivan and the two big rigs.

Sunday Gravy with yeah right: VEGAN Lentil Soup!

yeah right - March 27, 2022March 25, 2022

Good morning everyone! The NCAA tournament will be whittled down to the final four by the end of day today. Wasn't it just last weekend when we had like 32 fucking games and next weekend we only get 2? That's a substantial reduction in the number of sportsball contests, NCAA. Fuck else

BattleBots Beat: The Phil Rizzuto

Senor Weaselo - March 3, 2022March 3, 2022

Welcome back to the Beat! This week, I, how do I say this… like Phil Rizzuto's famous "WW" calls, I wasn't watching. I had a gig. I know what you're thinking. "Senor, couldn't you have had Rikki do this week, or watched on Discovery+?" To the first, yes, but I

A Modester Proposal: DFO Buys the Denver Broncos (and Tuesday Open Thread)

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - January 18, 2022

I have been called many things: Dreamer. Madman. Mrs. Ethel Burstein. But this is not some delusion of grandeur, like that time I thought I could renew my drivers license in less than two hours. No, this dream can come true. WILL come true. DFO is going to buy the Denver Broncos. It sort

Coach Zimmer Takes a Long Walk in the Woods.

yeah right - January 11, 2022January 11, 2022

banner image via [exterior Coach Zimmers' compound in Kentucky] Coach Zimmer walks in the front door of his expansive residence looking forlorn. He tosses his keys on the hall table and removes his Vikings cap. Coach Zimmer: "Hello? Beansie? Maria? I'm home!" A distant squeaking sound is heard and approaches Coach. "EEK EEEK EEEK!" CZ: "Beansie!

25 Questions About….

ballsofsteelandfury - December 20, 2021December 19, 2021

One of the most messed-up commercials we've all seen for a while. Of course, it's by one of the tech companies that are trying to take over your entire life. I speak of the Alexa commercial with the old couple. For those of you that have not

A modest proposal for the 2028 LA Olympics

ballsofsteelandfury - December 3, 2021December 2, 2021

As many of you know, I was born in México. La Ciudad de México, to be exact. That translates literally to "The City of México" but if you really want to understand México and the relationship between its capital and the rest of the country, you should

Cincinnati Bengals Bye Week Update – State of the Steelers

ballsofsteelandfury - December 1, 2021November 30, 2021

First of all, allow me to show off this bad boy: I love me some Cincinnati. I love WKRP. I think Redshirt is one of our coolest commenters. I have fond memories of watching Ken Anderson play back in the day. Unfortunately, the National Football League franchise knowns as