Ask me no questions, I will tell you no lies

blaxabbath - May 16, 2018May 16, 2018

INT. FOX SPORTS STUDIOS -- WESTWOOD, CA A producer mimes a countdown from five and, when reaching one, points a finger to the FS1 personality standing in front of a green screen. Erin Andrews: And, finally, in news related to the perpetual carousel that is NFL coaching hires, New England Patriots Offensive Coordinator

The Candidate

*Not A* Sponsored Post

blaxabbath - May 14, 2018May 13, 2018

Any executives in the room? Anyone responsible for human resources, HR? How about anyone from a workplace that is always looking for good people? You know, fits in. Would be a good match for the culture. Maybe someone young? Fresh blood. New ideas, ya know? Ever try LinkedIn? It's like Facebook but for professional

Howdy Pardner

Offseason stories

blaxabbath - May 2, 2018April 30, 2018

INT. ARIZONA CARDINALS PRESS ROOM -- DRAFT CLASS INTRODUCTORY PRESS CONFERENCE Josh Rosen: ...so, while I was a little emotional at the time, at the end of the day the draft is behind me. I’m excited to be in Arizona, to be a part of this organization, to be surrounded by such professionals,

War Room Conversations: Round 2

DFOing Good

blaxabbath - April 27, 2018April 27, 2018

104

INT. ARIZONA CARDINALS WAR ROOM – DRAFT DAY 2 The Cardinals' leadership is in conversation about what moves to make with the 15th selection of the NFL Draft's second round (47th overall). Steve Wilks: Gentlemen, while I'm as pleased as anyone about our first round decision to move up and draft Josh

2017 Quotables – Super Bowl (Results)

blaxabbath - February 9, 2018February 9, 2018

Another great season of Quotables. Kudos all around. You know, I thought the submissions these last couple weeks had been quite weak but you all really came through. So thanks for making me look good. You submissions are here. Results below. We'll see y'all back here for some -- well, realistically,

2017 Quotables – Super Bowl (Submissions)

blaxabbath - February 6, 2018February 6, 2018

Out with a whimper, here are the last of your 2017 Quotables. A special thanks to Unsurprised for his contributions this week. Make me proud.

2017 Quotables – Pro Bowl (Results)

blaxabbath - February 2, 2018February 2, 2018

Look, I didn't feel like writing up any text on Tuesday and I sure as hell don't feel like doing it today. Send me a meteor, a meteor, a meteor, or a Steel Reserve -- that's how MY week is going. Oh, what's that? You all don't tune in to Quotables

2017 Quotables – Pro Bowl (Submissions)

blaxabbath - January 30, 2018January 29, 2018

Sorry folks, park's closed. Moose outside should have told you. As you may have surmised, this is not Blax. Well, it is, but it's not. Blax chose the gifs for your enjoyment and for your submissions. I, on the other hand, am Balls and I am providing the wordy words while

2017 Quotables – Conference Round (Results)

blaxabbath - January 26, 2018January 26, 2018

Look, I was in Vegas for one night (Wednesday) and I think I'm still hungover. So I'll grind out some judgmental results here but you're not getting my special brand of wittiness and insightful commentary this Friday.

2017 Quotables – Conference Round (Submissions)

blaxabbath - January 23, 2018January 23, 2018

(Yeah, Swoop does not silhouette well.) I know there's a lot anti Eagles-fan (present company always excluded) hate floating around here after the behavior of Philadelphians on Sunday. And that hate is understandably valid. I think we've all been a little spoiled by dealing with Broncos fans and Seahawks "fans" in recent

2017 Quotables – Divisional Round (Results)

blaxabbath - January 19, 2018January 19, 2018

One of my favorite things about the postseason is that this is when stars are made. I mean, say what you will about Blake Bortles, he's an NFL quarterback for a conference championship game participant. What happened to Dak and Zeke since flaming out to an 0-1 playoff record in 2016?