Your “OOOOOHHHHHH YEEEAAAAHHHHH!!!!” Tuesday Night Open Thread

WHAT MADNESS IS THIS?! FERMENTEDBEVERAGEHUMANMALEROBERT HAS AWAKENED BOLTMAN FROM HIS DEEP, DARK SLUMBER WITHIN THE BOWELS OF SAN DIEGO COUNTY CREDIT UNION QUALCOMM JACK MURPHY STADIUM, DEMANDING HIS DECREE ON THE DAILY HAPPENINGS OF THE MORTAL WORLD OF THE ACCURSED NFL! BOLTMAN WILL ASSURE YOU ALL THAT FERMENTEDBEVERAGEHUMANMALEROBERT'S MESSENGER MET A SLOW AND

Your Generic Monday Evening Open Thread

I had originally intended to title this one "BeerGuyRob Gets an Anal Probe".  But there has already been entirely too much anal probing in my posts recently.  Plus, "anal" in the title would get us hits from those buttseks freaks searching for their buttseks.  And we've already got enough of

Your “Mastersmania Sunday!” Evening Open Thread

Sometimes, you just gotta go with the classics. By the time this thread goes live, the Masters should be wrapping up, unless there's a playoff, and Wrestlemania should be three hours into its seven-hour run time. I have friends attending each, in differing states of inebriation. Tonight's sports: NHL: Panthers at Bruins

Your “Another Season On The Outside Looking In” Saturday Evening Open Thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZcZwzVLsBsg It's an old episode of SCTV, taped off TV. The old local commercials are ridiculous, and the CBC bumpers are laughable. The Rough Trade appearance is very 1981; I can't figure out why all the guys in the band are bald, but I'm guessing the English majors they date don't

Gravy Boat Ruins Derby Day (Also Whiny Baby German Elton John)

Oh yeah, Man City can also clinch their foregone conclusion Premiership title with a home Manchester Derby win (which would be pretty fookin' sweet for them, if not coming off a humiliating hiding in the Champions League quarters).  That will be on big NBC at 12:30, and everyone will watch. 

Your “All This Coded Language Must Mean Everything’s Fine” Thursday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: Well, Bob McNair thinks offseason is the right time to wade back into his "inmates" comments again. “The main thing I regret is apologizing,” McNair said. It also really helped facilitate the Duane Brown trade to Seattle, as McNair also told the newspaper that when he met with the

2018 Tradition Like Any Other Preview and Afternoon Livethread

We just finished the NCAA Tournament. I bet you're asking yourself, "Where can I get more Jim Nantz? I can't wait all the way to the start of the NFL season to hear his velvety voice!" This is you, right? No? Yes, it's The Masters. Golf's biggest event, and it's most self-serving.

Your “I Need This Validation Of My Prognostication Skills” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: The Patriots have traded Brandin Cooks & a 4th-rounder to the Rams in exchange for the Rams 2018 first-round pick & a sixth-round pick. At least Dreamboat still has Gronk. For now. For statistical purposes, the Rams now have only one third-round pick, three fourth-round picks, and two sixth-round

Your “The Cross You Bear Is Only The Beginning” Easter Sunday Evening Open Thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ha5jJ0sLfUI If all went well this weekend, I am currently driving home from Seattle. If it didn't, I'm eating chicken fingers in my fat pants & watching the Star Wars marathon on Showcase. Speaking of fat pants, the banner pic is from the Sweet Jeϟus Ice Cream Shoppe in Toronto. They have a

World Gawne Mad – Final Four Holy Night Edition

Above is pictured the first-edition cover of a fantastic book, Walter Miller, Jr.'s "A Canticle For Liebowitz."  Be warned, even I found it a tad dark (and square on the nose social commentary, which made it all the more chilling).  But one will also feel like a Jesuit-by-osmosis afterwards, which