Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 41)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - July 29, 2016July 28, 2016

The scene: The launch pad on the Island of Professor Po, where Doktor Zymm, Yeah Right, King Hippo and Steve the Ninja all await takeoff in their rocket. Doktor Zymm (into the microphone): Mission control, start the countdown. Mission Control (via the radio): Affirmative. Starting countdown at five minutes. Doktor Zymm (into the

Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 40)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - July 22, 2016July 21, 2016

The scene: Space! The final frontier! This is the voyage of the unnamed rocket that is currently propelling Professor Po past the stratosphere. But what of our intrepid DFOers, last seen valiantly clinging to the rocket as it sped towards space? Welp, they fell off. Yup! Sorry about that. Burned

Not a BattleBots Preview: Let the Wars Begin… Again

Senor Weaselo - July 21, 2016July 21, 2016

Evening all. If anyone wants to know who I'm picking this week on BattleBots, I've got Razorback over Ghost Raptor, Warhead over Complete Control (which they're showing an audio clip of which is making me nervous), Son of Whyachi over Poison Arrow, and Tombstone over Escape Velocity, and if you

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Live On Periscope: The Oracle Talks Free Agent Signings

Don T - July 21, 2016July 21, 2016

Kinda OK video of a well-lit, plain kitchen; the audio is loud and clear. Door Flies Open: …right there on the big toe. But in the end, odontology is more art than science, I’ve been told. Over here? Lemme just set the phone facing *Loud thud* I AM STANDING HERE AT

Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 39)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - July 15, 2016July 15, 2016

The scene: Inside Professor Po's secret base, where the DFOers are scrambling madly down the hallway as the entire facility rumbles ominously. Doktor Zymm: Hurry! If zis is vat I zink it ist... Yeah Right: What do you think it is? Doktor Zymm: I believe Perzy is launching a mizzile, or perhaps a

BattleBots Way-Too-Late Recap, Way-Too-Early Preview, and Prediction Standings

Senor Weaselo - July 14, 2016

SAAAAAAN FRAAAAAANCIS… oh right, they're in LA this year, silly me. So, we are now officially into the knockout rounds of this year's BattleBots tournament. 32 robots go into the Box, one will eventually come out with the electronics of broken machines on one wheel and the Giant Nut on the

A Selekshun Uff Phrases From Recent Posts Zat Vould Make Goot Werner Herzog Moofie Titles

WhyEaglesWhy - July 14, 2016July 13, 2016

My Pitiful Human Experience The Familial History of Schizophrenia Your Absent Stepfather Lost To Iceland This Wonder Site of Dreams and Wishes Roving Packs of Ham Beasts The Dark Blood Ritual of Penance God's Ongoing Quest To Drive Me Insane The Last Time We Had To Suffer Tormenting My Dreams With His Insipid Chant The Most Existing Thing Kroenke's Mustache An Independent

Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 38)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - July 8, 2016July 15, 2016

The scene: A dorm at Miskatonic University, many years ago. A young Percival Po, in a white suit and black, open-collar shirt, a bouquet of flowers in his hand, timidly knocks on a dorm room door. Zymm's Roommate (opening the door): Yeah? Whaddaya want? Young Po (nervous): I'm, ah...supposed to pick up

BattleBots Recap: Preliminary Rounds and Bracket Preview

Senor Weaselo - July 4, 2016

One round of the 2016 BattleBots tournament is in the books! Or zero rounds, depending on what you want to call it. 48 robots had 24 fights to show what they could do to their opponent in the BattleBox to take their first steps towards the Giant Nut. Here's a

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Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 37)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - July 1, 2016June 30, 2016

The scene: A jail cell in the depths of the base on the dreaded island of Professor Po. The three DFOers being held captive by him are in it. King Hippo is testing his considerable might against the steel bars, frowning in vexation at their unyielding strength. Covalent Blonde

Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 36)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - June 24, 2016June 23, 2016

The scene: A beach on the Jungle Island of Professor Po. Doktor Zymm's yuuuuge RV drives up onto the sand out of the ocean. [DOOR FLIES OPEN] Doktor Zymm (stepping out of the RV): Vell, zis vas a bit of zerendipity. Otto's Brain (bouncing down the steps after Zymm): Sure was! Finding

Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 35)

Beastmode Ate My Baby - June 17, 2016June 17, 2016

The scene: An island jungle. Covalent Blonde is running through the foliage, carrying Yeah Right piggyback, with King Hippo lumbering behind. King Hippo: Keep running, you guys! They're gettin' closer! Covalent Blonde: We could be going faster, if I didn't have to carry Wounded Knee here. Yeah Right: I