Your Jets at the Bye Rant

Senor Weaselo - November 16, 2020November 16, 2020

The minimum word count's still broke, so let's do this: Let's put 5 minutes on the clock and see what I can type out. Ready? Go. The New York Jets are BAD. Forget winless bad, a lot of teams can do that. I'm talking great works of badness in history. I'm

Your “My Eyes, My Freakin’ Eyes!” Thursday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 1, 2020

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I quote from a synopsis of Oedipus Rex, "His self-punishment (blinding himself) reveals that he believes his suffering is deserved". That sounds about right, doesn't it? Perhaps that's a bit dark and melodramatic but on the other hand I might be preaching to the choir. (snorts) Well, this is where

Oh Yeah, It’s Time for a Jets Preview (or, Quarantine in the Underworld)

Senor Weaselo - August 18, 2020August 17, 2020

Scene: The underworld! Hades, the god of the Greek underworld, and Persephone, his wife and the goddess of both the underworld and vegetation, are at home watching the Marble League, because of course they are. Persephone is wearing a Raspberry Racers shirt, while Hades is wearing, out of all teams,

Horatio’s ‘Let’s Try To Get 5 Out Of 32 This Year, Dumbass’ Mock Draft

Horatio Cornblower - April 6, 2020April 5, 2020

This year's NFL draft runs from April 23-25 and will be a somewhat more subdued ceremony than in recent years, in that teams will be drafting remotely. It'll still be on TV, (I assume; I mean ESPN has got to show something besides old Michael Jordan games, right?), and we'll

Your “IT’S HERE! IT’S HERE! IT’S FINALLY HERE!” Superb Owl Open Thread

scotchnaut - February 2, 2020February 2, 2020

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There's much talk of drinkling and fooding in the early thread so I know that everyone is doing it right proper today. The forty-five minutes I spent on the elliptical (god, I hate that motherfucker) won't even begin to justify the calories that I'll be absorbing through the day but

Way Too Many Words on the Jets at the Bye: A Jets at the Bye Post

Senor Weaselo - September 24, 2019September 23, 2019

Can I count those as way too many words? I mean I'll ramble to get to the minimum because this is me. Hmm, what to say considering I've watched about one half of Jets football. The Jets decided to take a page from the most successful team in New York, the

Your “I Think The Banner Pic Pretty Much Covers It” Holiest of Holy Open Threads

scotchnaut - September 8, 2019

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Now that the Thursday Nighter has been wiped from our collective memories by all the weed, booze and pills that it is possible to ingest, let's see if today's slate can make a mark. TO THE GAMES! Rams/Panthers: As Cammer's shoulder goes, so goes Carolina and it seems fine. The Panthers are

Another Jets Preview in the Underworld, 2019 Edition

Senor Weaselo - August 13, 2019August 13, 2019

Right, this. Uh, shit. I haven't been down in a while, being busy and all. Eh, let's start this and I imagine someone will call and yell at me. So! Another year, another Jets preview. Oh, another coach, this time replacing Todd "Not Sally" Bowles https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhIt69v0yzY (I've wanted to use that for a

And Now, A Jets Fan’s Take on the New Unis

Senor Weaselo - April 5, 2019

So, unless you were under a rock yesterday, you might have heard that the New York Jets got new uniforms. They even had stuff going in Times Square during the press conference. The unis look… a-like this. Reactions have been… let's say mixed, to be generous. But hey, we've had a

Your “Fantasy Playoffs Ahoy!” Sunday Afternoon Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - December 9, 2018

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I'm late to the party today so we should go straight... TO THE GAMES! Jets/Bills: I will get this game on the old TV. I will not celebrate that fact. Panthers/Browns: God, wouldn't a Browns ambush go down smooth today? Falcons/Packers: Look for Mr. Rodgers to go nuts today. Now that he's got McCarthy off his

Instant Hippo Thoughts

ballsofsteelandfury - December 3, 2018December 2, 2018

"OW MY HEAD!" "UGH, MY STOMACH!" "YIKES, MY BALLS!" These may be some of the thoughts going through Hippo's head today as he is under the weather and has requested assistance in fulfilling his weekly report to you fine folks. Now, granted, I do not speak hillbilly although I can understand it. Thus, you

Your “The Cavalcade of Sports Continues” Sunday NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 25, 2018

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Let's go directly, TO THE GAMES! Jags/Bills: Had I told you at the birth of the season that the Bills would be matching the Jags win for win after 10 games in you'd most likely say, "I know you're fucking with me but I don't know exactly how." Each team has but