[BOOK FLIES OPEN]: Andrew Luck Knows How to Read

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BrettFavresColonoscopy - April 26, 2016April 26, 2016

It's been a busy past few days in NFL News: Josh Norman signed with the [REDACTED]s and shortly thereafter admitted that he tried and failed to go crawling back to the Panthers; Sam Bradford demanded a trade and said he wouldn't show up to OTAs in protest of the Eagles'

Diary of a Panic Attack Pt. 1

WCS - April 25, 2016April 25, 2016

Sup, kiddos. I used to suffer from the occasional panic attack episodes (meaning 1-4 over the span of 2-3 days) every year, year and half growing up. I didn't know what they were, nor did my parents ever really see fit to have it looked into. It's not their fault; I

Your “Thank God It’s Almost Over” Friday Open Thread

Beerguyrob - April 8, 2016April 8, 2016

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Not much on the NFL front today; remember - it's three weeks to the draft. Everybody's plotting and machinating in advance of picking the person everyone expects them to take. Except Jimmy Haslam - he's out trying to find another magic draft hobo. Too bad there's no direct rail link

Your Slimmed Down Easter Monday Open Thread

Beerguyrob - March 28, 2016March 28, 2016

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Did anyone else have a paid stat today? WHOO HOO! Gub'mint jorbs are the bestest! With that tack comes a slow news & sports day. With Easter (or, for that matter, any kid-centred holiday) comes your usual reminder that parents are the worst. Thirty-one days until the draft! Which means, a month of

Not Even Daddy (TWSS) Yet Blues

WCS - March 26, 2016March 26, 2016

Alright, you cockstains, I’m looking for some help. As all are most likely aware, I’m about to be a dad for the first time. I am fucking terrified, as I’m sure you other parents were the first time (PHRASING) were, when the realization finally hit home that you’re about to

Your “C’mon Tournament – Start Now!” Open Thread

Beerguyrob - March 14, 2016March 14, 2016

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Free agency – hungover from the weekend edition. It sure seems like everybody in charge binge-drank last week, because the signing news today sure seems like someone is holding my hair while I puke: The day’s highlight is Eric Weddle signing with the Ravens, in their attempt to have a more hirsute,

I Couldn’t Think of a Better Title Night Shift Thread

WCS - March 4, 2016March 4, 2016

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...so I gave you a Far Side cartoon, instead. Well, it's now March. March means spring is closer. It also means it's time for the greatest sporting event over the year*, the NCAA Tournament. While we're not quite there yet, it's tantalizingly close. Smaller conferences have begun their tournaments, and the

Down the Rabbit Hole with BoS

ballsofsteelandfury - February 27, 2016

Yeah Right's air guitar post led to this. So, if you have anyone to blame, it's him. When I was growing up in the 80s, I was incredibly lucky to grow up in Los Angeles, where I was exposed to many forms of music all reaching at that time what many

Superbowl #Content from Ben Blank, Uproxx Chief Creative Officer

WCS - February 5, 2016February 3, 2016

I'm not here to talk about that thing that's happening over the weekend. I'm here to talk about #content and #branding! That's what we're really interested in. People love #content, and they love #brands! Are you #upforwhatever? Here at Uproxx, we sure are! Whatever the cost, whatever it takes! Readers don't

El Contador escoje el ganador del Super Bowl

ballsofsteelandfury - February 1, 2016February 1, 2016

Hello! I'm Cyrill Figgis, otherwise known as El Contador. So, Ms. Archer told me (more like directed) me to write up a Super Bowl preview. I didn't really want to because I don't really follow sports, but she sorta forced me to... /shudders Anyhoo, even though the Vegas Police Department thinks I've been

Tuesday Night Holyshittheresalotofbasketball Thread

WCS - January 19, 2016January 19, 2016

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It's so much fun to see Dook having a "bad" season. It brings us great joy. Of course, those dickblocks will probably land a four-seed in the NCAA Tourney, and roll all the way to the national championship, because we're not allowed to experience joy for too long. Anyway, there's an

MLK Day Night Thread For #ALLLIVESMATTER

WCS - January 18, 2016January 18, 2016

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Don't you love when white men solve racism on their own? It's a beautiful thing. Now, if they could only get around to paying that child support... So now that football season is officially over (NANANANANANNA I CAN'T HEAR YOU NANANANANA), we're really shifting into other things. I am uncomfortable with