As an homage to the overused sports writing trope of “[X number] Burning, Itching, Throbbing Questions for [X Team/X Sport/X League]”, I present to you a list of questions that I, an uninformed and easily distracted NFL fan, had after Week 2. For a point of reference, I went to the
Month: September 2016
Your “Roger’s Got 25 Lighters” Wednesday Evening Open Thread
NFL Speakeasy Stories: Since Forever
Libertine, Downtown. 2:47 am, September 18th, 2016 Since Forever. The words non-mockishly running below the bar name printed on the drink napkins in lieu of a conventional "Establish Year X", Charlie Whitehurst could only chuckle to himself. This place had not been around forever, and he should know. For a Sunday night, the crowd was dead.
Fantasy Advice: Gary Oldman
Thanks to Rikki-Tikki-Deadly and Darkest Timeline Zach Morris' connections in Hollywood, we're bringing in a special guest to provide fantasy football advice this week: star of stage and screen GARY OLDMAN! --- DOORFLIESOPEN: Gary I can't tell how thrilled we are to have you providing our readers with fantasy football advice this week.
Your “Is Doug Flutie Still On Dancing With The Stars?” Tuesday Evening Open Thread
Book of Lions 16: 9-18
An excited murmur ripples through the flock of referees gathered in the Temple of Bleergh as High Priest Blandino takes the podium, a fanatical grin on his face. Welcome Brothers! Once again we gather in His most holy Hall of Holding to pledge our undying dedication to Bleergh. Hail Bleergh! HAIL BLEERGH! Today is a special day, Brothers.
2016 Quotables (Week 2 – Entries)
Amazing performances all around in Week 2. With the Ravens, Texans, and Eagles heading up the list of 'for real' undefeateds, we're shocked -- SHOCKED, I TELL YOU! -- to see the Dolphins, SLURS, and perpetual preseason darling Jaguras still winless. Hope you were watching but, if not (the MRSA/CANO game felt
LA Football: A Local’s View
Not surprisingly, USC fell to the Stanford Cardinal in Palo Alto by a score of 27-10. Somewhat surprisingly, UCLA beat the BYU Cougars in Utah by a score of 17-14. WHAT? Ok, FINE! The ...LA Rams (still sounds weird) played their home opener at the Coliseum against the Seattle Seahawks. And somehow, thanks
A Cannon Sounds
Balls of Steel’s AFL Beat – Finals Week 2 (Semifinals)
Imagine my surprise when I woke up on Friday morning and saw that the Western Bulldogs were within a point of the Hawthorn Hawks at Half Time. I thought, "Damn, the Doggies actually have a chance!" What happened afterwards, what happened the next day, and much more on Welcome to Balls
Your Monday Night Football Open Thread
/Inside DFO Headquarters Monday Morning Me: Guys, I'm at a loss here. The Bears and Eagles played just last night and now they're playing again tonight! How do I spin this? How comes no one is talking about this? Hippo: [shakes his goddamn head] What are you talking about? Me: The game. Tonight. It's
