The Man With The Mop: Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - January 9, 2024January 9, 2024

The NFL wastes no time chivvying its fans on to The Next Thing once the gratuitous bro-hugs-on-the-sidelines shots are finished- sometimes not even that long. I can't be certain, but within ten seconds of the game-clinching Tuaception Sunday night it seemed like NBC was blaring ads about HOT PLAYOFF ACTION.

Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Clinching Scenarios

Senor Weaselo - January 3, 2024January 3, 2024

As we get to the final week of the 2023 season (even though it's 2024), we see that there are a fuck-ton of clinching scenarios in play here in Week 18. In keeping with old traditions, here's the guide to all of them: AFC:The Baltimore Ravens have clinched the top seed

Stay On Target…: Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - January 2, 2024January 2, 2024

Once again, it All Comes Down to This. And that's kinda awesome. By my count, there are eleven (11) games with meaningful playoff implications, including five involving a "win and in" scenario. I can't say I've ever looked forward to a Colts-Texans game, but here we are. Moreover, because the NFL isn't

Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Dashing Through the Road…

Senor Weaselo - December 27, 2023December 27, 2023

So, as we mentioned last week, Christmas Eve, or Gigsmas. A time to play all the things. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you have multiple all the things to play, which is to say give your local church organist a hug and/or the beverage of their choice (okay, I got my

Are…Are We Through?: Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - December 26, 2023December 26, 2023

So we're in the home stretch. 2024 is nigh upon us, and I for one am terrified. Not so much because 2024 promises to be one of the strangest, most contentious and potentially republic-shattering on record. No, I am terrified because 2024 was not just "The Future" but "The Far Future" when

Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: The Definitive Christmas Carol Rankings

Senor Weaselo - December 20, 2023December 20, 2023

106

Good evening. My name is Senor Weaselo, and as some of you know, I play a lot of Jewish events. Weddings, shows, other, you name it. Despite this, as the Lubovitch have found out in disbelief numerous times when they ask if I want to partake in various religious customs and

Simply Having A Wonderful Sh*tsmastime: Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - December 19, 2023

Many of you voiced whole-hearted- dare I say fervent?- support for my Modest Proposal regarding summary roadside executions of rubberneckers. "What is next, wise Reverend? What further Grand Plans for Cultural Improvement can you offer?" I hear you say. Well. I realized today that the American justice system- indeed, all Western juridical traditions,

Your Thursday “Asleep-At-the-Switch” Carpenter Thread

WCS - December 14, 2023December 14, 2023

Ahoy-yoy! I realized I never did a Stillers bye week report, but who cares. They're 7-6, will never beat the Patriots in any meaningful way, the offensive is broken to hell, and are somehow in currenth #6th seed. Tomlin Voodoo is real, ya'll. Just accept this. This season has been so

Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Pre-Christmas Filler

Senor Weaselo - December 13, 2023December 13, 2023

God, do I hate doing page layout for scores. Maestro can probably attest to that, and then argue that a jazz band is actually a sandwich. But seriously, figuring out spacing, then seeing your spacing is shit thanks to things above/below the staff, then re-spacing, then figuring out measures—actually that

It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding): Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - December 12, 2023December 12, 2023

So here we are: mid-December, and it's All Coming Down To This. No more bye weeks. Precious little time for injured players to come back. The Patriots already eliminated from the picture and Darth Hoodie grinding tape of where the hottest MILFs live in The Villages. It's the HOME STRETCH,

Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: The Tim Boyle Memorial Thread

Senor Weaselo - December 6, 2023December 6, 2023

164

Yes, here we are to remember notable Jets quarterback Tim Boyle, unquestionably one of the quarterbacks of all time. Who can forget that pass, and that thing, and also that Hail Mary? We laughed, we cried, we shook our head in disbelief, I shook my head in total belief because

FATHER, I CRAVE VIOLENCE!…Tuesday Open Thread

Open Threads

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - December 5, 2023December 5, 2023

As long time readers of my barely-intelligible howlings will know, I generally have no love, patience or pity for "revenue generating sports" at the college level. The most charitable good-faith interpretation I can muster is that a relatively innocent but stupidly naive concept of the virtues of "amateurism" was corrupted