Your Official DFO-CON 2017 Announcement Post

AFTERNOON - SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA - NONDESCRIPT OFFICE BUILDING INTERIOR [An extremely pale but handsome young man sits at his desk, trying to do anything but work. Sensing a presence behind him, he minimizes his open window to a complicated looking spreadsheet and turns around.] Low Commander: Yeah, so, that'll be done in-- Oh,

NFL Week 1 Bettors’ Guide

Ted Kaczynski: Gambling is the prime dehumanizer of the monetary system! I will NOT-- Door Flies Open: SHHH! Let me do the intro. [clears throat] I’m on Skype with the most notorious inmate of the Colorado Supermax. He's the only PhD on this site to have 100% accuracy predicting NFL games. Ted

Your “All About That (In)Action, Boss!”” Monday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: Tracy Porter has been waived by the Bears. Backup QB news: Matt McGloin has been signed by the Eagles T.J. Yates has been signed by the Bills. The Bills also signed Ian Seau, the undrafted free-agent nephew of Junior and proof the Spanos family wouldn't know a good PR

Your “Vegas Baby!” Monday Evening Open Thread

Banner image via don_t Like the Hall of Fame, this really should have happened while Ken Stabler was alive. Imagine the marketing! NFL News, non-Raiders: Trevone Boykin makes this week's Crimebeat! with an arrest while being a passenger in a car accident. Oof -  marijuana possession and public intoxication. this follows missing the

DFO Poker Club Announcement

I mentioned this on the AFL Beat, but it bears repeating: DFO Poker Club We at DFO are constantly looking for ways to improve the commentist experience. The thing that built this site was the sense of comraderie that existed on the open threads at our former home. We wanted to keep

Balls of Steel’s AFL Beat – AFL Women’s Round 4

You know, the more and more I watch the AFL Women's competition, the more I Appreciate the game of Australian Rules Football Respect the shit out of these women that play this game and expose themselves to injury while maintaining regular jobs Dig the AFL and how it's run. It's really

Everyone on the Internet is wrong: A Balls Wild Card Preview

As you already know,  we have four games this weekend. That much there is no argument about.  As to who will win,  that's where we get into a bit of a gray area.  How gray? Despair not,  dear friends, as I'm here to dispel Wild Card myths.  I'm also here to

TGISF…aka “I Couldn’t Think of a Good Theme This Week, So…..Keira Knightley and ASS HERPES” Sexy Friday Open Thread

**Disclaimer....I am not saying Keira Knightley has ASS HERPES.  As far as I know, she most definitely does not....(please do not sue DTZM) But it was pointed out to me while in Vegas last weekend, though in a subtle fashion admittedly (I'm looking at you Rikki Tikki Deadly and Rev Mayhem),

Meanwhile, at the Luxor

INTERIOR, LUXOR CASINO & HOTEL - MAIN STAGE [A large audience sits in their seats and murmurs in anticipation of the premiere of Las Vegas' most talked about new show. After a few moments, the lights shut off, and the stage begins to fill with smoke.] ANNOUNCER: Welcome, everyone, to the Luxor

TGISF…aka “LIVE FROM VEGAS!!!!” Sexy Friday Open Thread

Well, maybe "LIVE from Vegas" is an overstatement, as this is mostly being written while I'm still on normal standard time....errrrr eastern standard time.  But regardless of being pre-written, by the time this post goes up on Friday evening, I and at least a few of our other imaginary peeps