On Labour Day Weekend, my lazy Saturday started with a vigorous masturbation session and only got better from there. On Hippo's JV Footy Open Thread, https://www.doorfliesopen.com/2018/09/01/jv-nfl-2018-kickoff-posting/ he encouraged us commentists to spice up our game-watching activities by making some wagers. Redshirt and I stepped up as UCLA and Cincinnati were playing each other at