World Cup Previews

2018 World Cup Team Preview – Poland

SonOfSpam -
28

Poland enters the 2018 World Cup as a mystery wrapped in an enigma cloaked in bowling shirts. The Polandites qualified impressively, winning their group by 5 points over Denmark. However, their form since then has been spotty, and their recent World Cup history is as impressive as their screen-doored submarines

World Cup 2018 Japan Preview: A Monstrous Mess

Wakezilla -
29

Japan is a really cool country that everyone should visit in their lifetime because it has just about everything a person can ask for. It's an ancient culture that is on the cutting age of technology. And they have a ton of weird shit--including sea creatures that eat from their ass.

2018 World Cup Team Preview – Colombia

ballsofsteelandfury -
25

Quite a few of us resident DFO Lesser Footy enthusiasts have Colombia as our sleeper of the tourney. Therefore, we've decided to split up the preview amongst us, roundtable style. Without further ado, *** Balls Colombia invented the butt-lift jeans.  Seriously. Some places call them "levantapompis" or "magicola". Just know that if you see any

World Cup 2018 Tunisia Preview: Not My Favorite

blaxabbath -
149

FIFA Rank:  14th.  So, right of the bat here, a country you may have mocked as even having a national soccer team is actually better globally than the Jets/Browns/Colts/Cardinals/Bears/Bucs/49ers are in the NFL. World Cup Group: G (along with England, Belgium, and Panama). Hey, How’d They Get Here?:  Direct from the FIFA World Cup

World Cup 2018 Panama Preview: The Dirtiest Players in the Game

Wakezilla -
27

Panama is an interesting team (on paper) because their World Cup tournament could go one of two ways. The first way is what most people are predicting: the oldest and arguably least talented squad in the tournament is going to finish last and will be lucky to score a goal.

World Cup Previews: England

The Maestro -
20

I'm fully prepared for disappointment once again as a fan of England football; however, at least this year's edition of failure might well come with a slight dash of hope beforehand this time. The 2014 World Cup was one of the worst outings ever for the national team; a single point

World Cup 2018 Team Preview – Belgium

King Hippo -
24

Ah, the misty water colour memmmmmories....Belgium gives Hippo all the feels.  Big Rom and Roberto Martinez, together again?  It's the last really hopeful period in Everton Lesser Footy history (before Martinez' fatal flaw at the EPL level - defensive indifference - kicked in, along with many, many defeats in the dying

World Cup 2018 Team Preview – Sweden

ballsofsteelandfury -
30

Whatever happened to the Swedish Bikini Team? I mean,  yeah,  they were really American models that were put together for an Old Milwaukee advertising campaign in the early 90s, but still... The eternal question remains: how hot are real Swedish girls? Um, yeah... so the answer is VERY. But this is a World Cup

2018 Copa Mundial Team Preview – México

ballsofsteelandfury -
30

As I type this,  México is playing Scotland in a friendly match in the Despedida for El Tri. The French would call it the Au Revoir or Bon Voyage game.  It has become tradition to play a last friendly before the World Cup at home to wish the players good

World Cup 2018 South Korea Preview: So you’re saying there’s a chance

Wakezilla -
41

*Scene opens to a pitch black room. All you can see is black and the sounds of an older man grunting* Old Man breathing heavily: Oh yeah, that little black dress is getting a little uncomfortable. Take it off, baby. *The sound of pumping Vaseline can be heard* OM: Oh yeah, almost there,

World Cup 2018 Costa Rica Preview: Mangoes FOAR All!

King Hippo -
20

Costa Rica is a delightful Central American nation.  Friendly people, tropical weather without the bullshit Carnival Cruise tourismo atmosphere to trigger the shit out of one's white guilt.  I thoroughly enjoyed my Divorcemas trip there several years ago.  They have a saying for how the peoples live - "la pura