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Category: Bastards
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CrimeBeat!: An Existential Quandre Edition
It’s that time again- time to examine the biggest NFL felonies (real or metaphorical) of the last couple of days weeks (gimme a break,…
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MOST GLORIOUS EL BEISBOL CARDINALS (and some NFL thing) Open Thread
That’s right, kids- Uncle Scotchy is…indisposed for the evening. Some people just can’t hold their chloroform. WHICH MEANS that Ol’ Reverend Mayhem is driving…
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Wangs of New York: Your 2019 Buffalo Bills Bye Week Bonanza
[Interior. Press Room at the Meadowlands. JOSH ALLEN is at the podium, answering questions after beating the New York “Football” “Giants”.] ANONYMOUS PR FLACK:…
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Go Home, Fate, You’re Drunk: 2019 Detroit Lions at the Bye
[INTERIOR, STAGE WITH CLOSED CURTAIN. From offstage, muffled and slurred shouts are heard, mostly inaudible but include variations on “Not goin’ outthere!” and “You…
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Huh…..: Your San Francisco 49ers Bye Week Update
DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!??!?!? YES!!!! Friends, I have preached before at interminable length about how we live in The New Time of Wonders. Now BLEERGH!,…
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CrimeBeat!: Blind Squirrel Edition
What a long, strange trip it’s been for Antonio Brown in New England. They’ve laughed. They’ve cried. They’ve grumbled. Yes, Antonio Brown’s lengthy tenure…
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Pissing Up God’s Flagpole: Your 2019 Detroit Lions Preview
[Author’s Note: So this is it. The End. The final preview before the NFL meat grinder spins up to turn convert the bodies of…
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No One’s Chargers 2019 Preview: Top Bolt
INTERIOR – CHARGERS WAR ROOM, MIRA MAR, CA – MIDDAY MAJ. TOM TELESCO: [Walking in] Good morning Tony. COMM. ANTHONY LYNN: Morning Tom. RADIO: Ghost Audience,…
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Tripping Over The Light Fantastic; or A Desperate Plié: Your All-Dancing 2019 Buffalo Bills Season Preview
[Author’s Note: As promised/threatened, this year’s Buffalo Bills Season Preview will be conducted in the medium of interpretive dance. Yes, I know it’s particularly…
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Santa Clara Diet: A San Francisco 49ers Preview
[Author’s Note: In support of DFO’s efforts to maintain its position at the bleeding edge of Blog Innovation, I have chosen to conduct this…