No One’s 2017 “Chargers” Bye Week Update

There has been a fair amount of discussion so far this year of what the new name for the football team formerly residing in San Diego should be. To BOLTMAN, they will forever be the Heretics. To many on this site, various combination of Football/Shitty Clippers and LAwnmowers has been

The Evil Dean

EXTERIOR - RAMSHACKLE CABIN IN THE WOODS - EARLY DUSK [The camera slowly zooms and then pans around the cabin. There is an odd silence, as not even birds or insects can be heard nearby. Upon reaching the back door, the camera moves upward, until it just looking over the roof

Stadium of Leaves – Nobody’s 2017 Chargers Preview

This is a collaborative post from the sick and horrible minds of Old School Zero and Low Commander of the Super Soldiers. You have been warned. [Up in the owner’s box of the vast, expansive, huge, massive, otherworldly large, Brobdingnagian, 30,000 27,000 seat StubHub Legal Scalping Center, DEAN SPANOS sits alone and looks out over the

Fun with Nick Hardwick: A Liar’s Guide for Moving to LA 3 – Carson Drift

Last week, former San Diego Chargers radio color commentator and long time center, Nick Hardwick, announced that he would be doing a complete and total about-face on his decision to call games for the second NFL team in Los Angeles. This is rather surprising, considering the fact that Hardwick had

Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain

FEBRUARY 2017 - MIDDAY - INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA - CHARGERS/RAMS JOINT STADIUM SITE [Three well-dressed men exit a limo and approach a chain-link fence, bordering a sprawling quagmire of mud] STAN KROENKE: The foreman is telling me that this rain may cause a serious delay. DEAN SPANOS: How serious? DALE KOGER: With the high rainfall so far this

A Night at the Opera: BOLTMANIAN RHAPSODY

♫ Set to the music of “Bohemian Rhapsody” from Queen ♫ FANS: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a cash grab, One escape from re-al-ity. Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see… DEAN SPANOS: I'm such a rich boy, I want your sympathy, Because Dad-dy came, I will go, Pretty high; lots of

New Chargers Helmet Design Proposals

It's been a strange couple of weeks in San Diego. There has been talk of clearing the land on the site where Qualcomm Stadium used to stand, following BOLTMAN'S exodus, in order to make way for a bid at attracting a new sport to San Diego: MLS Soccer. The plan

That’s it.

Author's Note:  I wrote this in the wee hours of Monday morning after being rightfully PISSED OFF about Sunday's game.  I've sat on it and spent all of Monday trying to cool down and get some perspective.  I'm re-reading it on Monday night to see if I want to take

Fun with Roger Goodell: A Liar’s Guide for Moving to LA 2 – Electric Byegaloo

After sixteen years of threats, the San Diego Chargers officially filed for relocation last Thursday to move to Los Angeles, a city that has made it abundantly clear that they do not want them. His eyes on smoggier pastures and the false promise of more cash monies, Dean Spanos stomp, stomp,

A Primer For Newly-Orphaned Chargers Fans

Fuck-You-Dean

The San Diego Chargers have returned home, to their original home of Los Angeles.  (Is that how I do it, LA Rams fans?)  Regardless of whether you’re a fan of the Chargers or a normal person, this news can’t be surprising.  San Diego smartly refused to hand Dean Spanos hundreds

ELECTRIC EXODUS – The Final Showdown

SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA - DOWNTOWN - DAY BREAK BOLTMAN: WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN BOLTMAN'S DOMAIN. THE FAITHFUL CHARGED ONES MEANDER ABOUT THEIR PITIFUL, MORTAL LIVES AS ANOTHER LONG OFFSEASON BEGINS. BUT BOLTMAN MUST NOT WAIVER! [Shreds an air guitar solo] IT IS UP TO HIM TO ONCE AGAIN LEAD HIS LEGION