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Category: Bastards
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DFO Mock Draft: Presidential Write-Ins
You might have heard on the news that there’s an election happening soon for some government job on Tuesday. The two main candidates have…
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Cam Gets His Call
Operator: Charlottesville Telephone Operator Extension 035115, how may I direct your call?….I see, yes sir, I believe he is expecting you….(Phone Clicks)…Alright, you are connected to…
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CrimeBeat!: Death to the Mortals! Edition
Friends, Halloween is upon us. And to be frank, it’s perhaps the most depressing holiday on the calendar for the precise life-space-time coordinates I…
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25 NFL Questions From An Uninformed And Easily Distracted Fan: Week 7
As an homage to the overused sports writing trope of “[X number] Burning, Itching, Throbbing Questions for [X Team/X Sport/X League]”, I present to you…
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25 NFL Questions From An Uninformed and Easily Distracted Fan: Week 6
As an homage to the overused sports writing trope of “[X number] Burning, Itching, Throbbing Questions for [X Team/X Sport/X League]”, I present to you…
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CrimeBeat!: The White Album Edition
Hello and welcome back to CrimeBeat!, the internet’s only source for NFL crime-related news not beholden to donors, party politics or special interests. Brought…
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Stab My Ears with Broken Mirros
I love music. You name it, I will listen to it. Except new country, I’d rather be locked in a closet with Cris Collinsworth,…
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CrimeBeat!: DO YOU SEE THE LIGHT?!?! Edition
Brothers and sisters and those in between, I thank you for joining the DFO congregation on this glorious day. It is a day of…
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Drowning Lessons, A Look at My Shitty Pool
So summer is over at my pool. Boo fucking hoo. I hate the place and wish it sprung a gigantic hole that allowed water…