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Author: Don T
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First Pre-Preseason Sunday Open Thread
[Walks up to podium, slight nod towards youse, adjusts microphone exasperatingly, grumbling atmosphere established] Cough. Hi! Good evening. Yeah… I’m also bummed. If only…
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![Aaaaa [harp notes] The Shempiens… Round of 16, Gameday 2](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/20230213_152357.jpg)
Aaaaa [harp notes] The Shempiens… Round of 16, Gameday 2
Hello, individual in the middle of a workday, welcome to Day 2 of the Final 16 of the Shempiens Lïg. Teams play a two-legged…
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A Valentine for the Shempiens – Round of 16, Gameday 1
After an intense Hate Week and the sudden end of the NFL season, here’s Valentine’s Day: the most superficial and fabricated holiday there is.…
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A Lesser Owl, by LongtimeLionsLoser
Note: This is a post by LongtimeLionsLoser /*smoke bomb*/ So, this is my first time writing a post, and I’m already off to a…
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Keeping It Holy – Slave LaboUr Cup Final Open Thread
Buenos días, mes ami(e)s invisibles. This final I call it… Spectacular. France was the class of the tournament, which was surprising. The team is…
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The Dream of Colonial Revenge: MAR v. FRA Slave LaboUr Cup Semi
You know how it is. Some foreigners come to your backyard like they own the place and steamroll over everything: freedom, language, culture, livelihoods……
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Slave LaboUrs Recap and Knockouts Day 1 Mundial Open Thread
Hola, beautiful gente. Your regularly scheduled pachyderm is doing kingly stuff so excuse me while I hijack this spot to talk about an infuriating,…
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Chalk or Destiny: Argentina Slave LaboUr Cup Preview
“Oops, almost stepped on the country with the best fans, with the best insults, the best foods, with the best fútbol player and the…
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On the Offensive – Uruguay Slave World Cup Preview
Greetings, cretins. Line up your toothiest, bity-est takes for the farewell performance of Luis Suárez’s career. More accomplished nags than I will also expound…
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The Cozy Simplicity of Crises: a Wednesday Motivational
Let’s assume, just for a moment, that you are impatient or neurotic (quite a stretch, oh yeah). Imagine you are hungry and you extend…