2017 Carolina Panthers Horrible Preview

Or should that be "2017 Horrible Carolina Panthers Preview"? Yes, that seems more apropos. Sooooooo, two years removed from almost running the regular season table, an NFC Championship and a (disappointing) Superb Owl appearance, are the Panthers going to suck again this year? Yes.  Yes they are.  And here's why... - 2015 Carolina Panthers -

Your “People Tell Me That I’m Gonna Lose You” Sunday Evening Open Thread

So, the first weekend of the pre-season ends tonight, with the Seahawks going down I-5 & then onto I-10 to visit some team called the "Los Angeles Chargers" in a stadium named after a business with less credibility than the University of Phoenix. As has been my standard in covering these

Your “You’ve Worked Like Heck To Get The Week In Check” Saturday Evening Open Thread

I hope you got outside, and it was nice where you live. Rain is forecast for Vancouver tonight and into Sunday, and none of us can fucking wait. This goddamned smoke is killing the summer. The last few days have been humid as fuck, and the reflective properties of the smoke

“This Is The Worst Thing To Happen To Dallas Since 1963”-A Post-Suspension Conversation With A Rational Cowboys Fan

Typical Cowboys Fan:  "What the fucking fuck just happened!?" Rational Cowboys Fan:  "Our star running back has just been suspended for the first six games of the season." TCF:  "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!  WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!??? RCF:  The official reason is that he violated the NFL's Personal Conduct Policy. TCF:  What the fuck does that even fucking mean!?" RCF:  The

TGISF… aka “Taste The Rainbow” Sexy Friday Open Thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fahr069-fzE Roy G Biv was a smart sumbitch.  If you didn't take physics in school, you have no idea what that means probably. Foreshadowing?  Yes.  But we'll get to that, I promise.  First, some final business.... - Sexy Friday has been on a bit of a non-hiatus-hiatus, in a manner of speaking, for the

Your “Multiple Games = Multiple Disappointments” Thursday Evening Open Thread

NFL Notes: The pre-season schedule begins in earnest tonight, with 7 games, "highlighted" by a game of musical QB chairs in Chicago between the Bears & Broncos. Elway could come out of the box & be as effective. Hell - mid-stroke Kubiak would be better than most of what we'll

We aren’t in Le-High anymore.

Current DFO Clubhouse before the Puerto Rican money rolls in. The Commentists are all sitting around drinking their favoUrite libations and imbibing their narcotic of choice when suddenly there is a knock on the door. Through the marijuana haze MTWV peers through the window and falls back asleep. LITRE COLA :I guess

The 2017 Redacteds : We are Not Enthused

It seems that "Kinda like last year, but slightly worse" is not an adequate team preview, even if I tack on "Third in the NFC East." Where is the overexuberant and unrealistic optimism of the typical Redacteds fan, you may ask?  And I would respond that third in the NFC East

Your “Why Can’t I Quit You?!” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Notes: Branden Albert now wants to unretire & play for the Jags. News he might have to repay a $3.4 million signing bonus will do that to a fella. Jags management instead are keeping him on the "reserve/retired" list, having moved him over from the more vague "left team"

Executing Jameis: Your DFO Legal and Fantasy Football Mailbag

ALL RISE! The DFO Mailbag of Law and Fantasy Football is Now In Session (please see the disclaimer at the bottom of the page). Greetings Dick Joke Enthusiasts.  It's your old pal TrollSoHardUniversity.  As some of you know, I'm licensed attorney and a fantasy football mastermind.    Last January, I came