Your “No Problems Here – What Are You Talking About?”

NFL News: Tony Romo will miss Friday's Chiefs-Seahawks game because his son was born last night. Good for him. Little Jones McCoy Romo joins older brothers Hawkins & Rivers in the Romo playpen. I'm guessing the name is a tribute to JERRAL, and an unsilent thank-you for the bonus money

Your “Today I Settle All Family Business” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: Le'Veon Bell will return to the Steelers on September 1st: It's looking a tad more serious in New York, as reports are OBJ may miss the season opener at the Cowboys due to the ankle injury he picked up against the Browns. The MRI has revealed only a

Making Ezekiel: Your [DFO] Law and Fantasy Football Mailbag

By far the most common question submitted this week was about where you should take Ezekiel Elliot in your upcoming drafts.  The second most common question submitted was if it is ethically proper to take Zeke in the draft.   I'll take the second question first:  If you want to

YA BETTA SUE SOMEBODAYYYY: Your [DFO] Law and Fantasy Football Mailbag

Nazis! Suspensions! Nuclear War! Trades! What a week for questions about law and fantasy football!  Unsurprisingly, most of your law questions were about our Ululating Sack Of Wet FartsDear Leader and the legal ramifications of his relentless drive to make this world an even more terrible place than it already

Your “So Damn Tired and Uninspired” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

I just don't have much in terms of creativity today, so I apologize for going to my weekend well to tie something into the Miami QB situation: NFL News: Break out a fresh bag of "Feline Pine", because Jay Cutler is going to start this Thursday. At most, he plays the

Your “The Lesson Learned Is ‘Not To Care'” Monday Evening Open Thread

Well, I believe I speak for the majority when I say, those were some real Week-1 preseason games. Oh, and fuck Dean Spanos with a rusty shiv. μαλάκας! NFL Notes: The Lord giveth, and BLEERGH taketh away: A week after signing a new five-year deal, Devonta Freeman is in concussion protocol. He'll sit

Your “People Tell Me That I’m Gonna Lose You” Sunday Evening Open Thread

So, the first weekend of the pre-season ends tonight, with the Seahawks going down I-5 & then onto I-10 to visit some team called the "Los Angeles Chargers" in a stadium named after a business with less credibility than the University of Phoenix. As has been my standard in covering these

Your “Multiple Games = Multiple Disappointments” Thursday Evening Open Thread

NFL Notes: The pre-season schedule begins in earnest tonight, with 7 games, "highlighted" by a game of musical QB chairs in Chicago between the Bears & Broncos. Elway could come out of the box & be as effective. Hell - mid-stroke Kubiak would be better than most of what we'll

Stadium of Leaves – Nobody’s 2017 Chargers Preview

This is a collaborative post from the sick and horrible minds of Old School Zero and Low Commander of the Super Soldiers. You have been warned. [Up in the owner’s box of the vast, expansive, huge, massive, otherworldly large, Brobdingnagian, 30,000 27,000 seat StubHub Legal Scalping Center, DEAN SPANOS sits alone and looks out over the

Your “Meanwhile, Back At The Legion of Boom…” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Notes: Kam Chancellor agreed to a three-year extension. Three years, $36 million - with $25 million guaranteed. Look forward to Seattle in 2017 having a great defence, and Russell Wilson having to run for his life because they can only afford tackling dummies on the O-line. Injuries have forced

Tina’s DFO Erotic Friend Fiction #9 – “Special Sauce”

Tonight's Episode: "Special Sauce" The young man sat on the NYC Subway, riding along, lost in thought.  Rehearsals had been cancelled and he unexpectedly had the whole day to himself.  As he sat, thinking about all of the things he wanted to do today, a commotion started on the far end of

Your “Daylight Upon The Horizon” Thursday Evening Open Thread

Two big highlights of the day: All teams have their main training camps opening today or tomorrow; and The Hall of Fame Game is one week today. Funnily, the increasingly shorter days seem a little bit brighter. NFL News: Problems on the elite front: Joe Flacco, depending on which story you read,